On the way back to the hotel, Gabby and Ayesha decided that if they had to have a nap they wanted to stay together. Camilla said it was fine if they wanted to stay in her room. She was clearly sensing some unspoken tension coming from Bianca at having to pull short their first full day in the park.
"Would you like that Gabby?" asked Bianca hugging Gabby, who was still riding on her lap.
"Yes!" exclaimed Gabby.
Marissa grinned at her girlfriend. She certainly was doing a great job at covering her disappointment.
…
Once they got to their hotel room, Marissa helped Bianca from the wheelchair to the bed.
"So how do you really feel… be honest." asked Marissa, bending down to unlace Bianca's shoes.
"I can still do that, you know." Bianca said light-heartedly.
Marissa looked up at her girlfriend with a no nonsense expression on her face, she wasn't going to tolerate Bianca trying got avoid the subject.
"Bianca…" she warned.
Bianca sat back with a sigh, as Marissa pulled off her shoes.
"Be honest…" muttered Bianca, "I'm fed up with the wheelchair… I'm frustrated about what an effort it is to get in and out of those rides… and I'm annoyed that I can't seem to function for longer than seven hours without needing a break... Is that honest enough?"
Marissa squeezed her right knee.
"You're getting stronger everyday… and you're probably still a bit jet lagged, I should have let you sleep longer this morning."
"No, we needed to get up." said Bianca. She slid further up the mattress so she could lay her head back on the pillow. "I'll get over this… I just like a bit more control of things."
Marissa took a seat beside her on the bed.
"How is you're leg?" she asked reaching over matter-of-factly to begin unfastening the flies of Bianca's jeans.
When Bianca didn't answer Marissa looked up to find her girlfriend watching her with a smirk and an amused twinkle in her eyes.
"I can do that as well, you know?"
Marissa laughed at her own actions, she hadn't thought about it when she started.
She grinned back awkwardly.
"Well, obviously I can't keep my hands off you." she said "…And you do need your brace off."
Bianca was laughing too now.
"True." she said, lifting her hips so Marissa could pull her pants free.
While Marissa worked at ripping open the Velcro straps that fastened Bianca's brace she was aware of Bianca sitting up slowly and leaning in; the distance between them so close she could feel the heat of her girlfriend's breath on her cheek. Her blood rushing as Bianca moved nearer, Marissa did her best to ignore her girlfriend obvious desire.
"You are supposed to be resting." said Marissa, finding it a struggle not to meet Bianca's eyes.
There was the seductive sound of Bianca softly parting her lips close to her ear.
"I'm not doing anything." Bianca whispered.
Marissa took a deep breath and pulled away from Bianca.
"Come on… I need to check your leg." said Marissa finally finding the strength to look Bianca in the eye. Her girlfriend looked heavenward briefly in defeat.
"You can't blame a girl for trying." she said with grin.
"Not right now, okay." said Marissa, trying hard to keep her mind on the matter at hand. "God… you're incorrigible!"
"Um… you're the one who couldn't wait to rip my pants off." protested Bianca.
Marissa shook her head. Her girlfriend was impossible… it was great to see that spark still there after everything but a part of her suspected it was just another way for Bianca to distract herself from the issue of her current condition.
"So…" said Marissa trying to get back on track, "Your leg? Can you bend your knee?"
Bianca followed instructions and bent her left knee with little difficulty.
"Lift your leg." commanded Marissa.
Bianca obeyed, although this took a little more effort and concentration.
"Wriggle your toes."
Bianca did as she was asked.
"See my leg is fine." she said.
Marissa blew out a sigh.
"Almost, you've caught you toe again."
Bianca sat up straighter to see blood on her bandaged big toe.
"Damn, I must have knocked it when I got out of that little car." she said with an annoyed pout.
Marissa pulled off the bandage.
"It looks alright. The bleeding's stopped." she said examining the nail.
"Well, that's good."
Bianca pulled her foot close to get a better look.
"I'll grab an antiseptic wipe and a new Band-Aid." said Marissa, getting up from the bed to rummage in her purse.
"Thanks." said Bianca, wiggling the toe nail to see if it had come any looser. She imagined if she could still feel she would probably be in agony while she did that, but now there was nothing.
"Do you need to see a doctor?" Marissa asked, handing Bianca the medical kit as she settle back into the edge of the bed.
"It should be okay." said Bianca.
"You've got a new bruise as well." said Marissa, noticing a purple patch at the back of Bianca's calf.
"Yay." said Bianca turning her leg to see what Marissa was talking about. The bruise was no bigger than a bottle cap. "I'll live." she said, turning her attention back to her toe.
Once her wounded toe was re-bandaged Bianca sat back on the bed with a wide grin as she looked to Marissa.
"So what now?" she asked. "Are we done with my leg?"
Marissa was aware that Bianca was still flirting with her, but she was still worried about the new mark on Bianca's left leg. Frankie had warned than small bruises like that could be caused by muscle strain.
"I want to check you over just to be sure." said Marissa, reaching to massage her way up Bianca's left leg.
Bianca dropped back into her pillow, watching Marissa's careful progress as she felt her way slowly along the length of her leg. Bianca wasn't sure why, but she was finding the slow movements of Marissa's fingers, and the pure concentration on her face, terribly erotic even if there was no sensation at all from her touch.
As Marissa's fingers massaged just beyond her knee Bianca spoke.
"I do have a bit of an ache on my hip." She said quietly. Marissa's careful fingers suddenly slid up to where Bianca could feel it, gently massaging the area around her left hip.
"Where does it hurt?" Marissa asked.
"I didn't say it hurt." said Bianca softly. "I just ached for you to touch me." Unable to stand it any longer she sat up and twisted her head to plant a heated kiss against Marissa's mouth.
Marissa moaned, a little surprised by the onslaught, but found herself surrendering to the moment as Bianca pulled her down on top of her, never parting their lips.
Marissa stopped herself before she was lying fully on top of her half-dressed girlfriend as she struggled to leave the intoxicating kiss. Bianca was making this so hard for her.
"You are supposed to be resting." she said, her breathing heavy as her body betrayed her.
"I'm lying down." said Bianca playfully, reaching up to stroke Marissa's cheek, and leaning forward for more kisses.
Marissa turned her head away reluctantly.
Bianca collapsed back into her pillow.
"Oh, so it was alright for you to be all randy yesterday… but today what I want doesn't matter!" said Bianca, her voice dripping with distain.
Marissa looked back, hurt by Bianca's sudden unexpected accusation.
"It's not like that!" she protested, pulling out of Bianca's arms. "I'm just worried about…" she began.
"It's exactly like that!" Bianca snarled; anger in her eyes as she interrupted her.
"Bianca!" gasped Marissa, reaching out to touch her girlfriend's shoulder.
"No." said Bianca, jerking back, "You've made yourself perfectly clear, you can't bring yourself to touch me!"
This was a side of Bianca she had never seen before. She looked so resentful.
"This just proves you are tired or you wouldn't be talking like this." replied Marissa stepping away from their bed to sit on AJ's cot. She tried to sound clam and logical to defuse the situation, but her own voice had an edge of bitterness to it, purely in response to Bianca's startling rage.
There was a moment to painful tension and then Bianca closed her eyes and held her head in her hands.
"I'm sorry…" she said after a moment. "I didn't mean to snap…"
"…You're not yourself." finished Marissa.
"Maybe I'm not." said Bianca with a sigh. She looked up to see Marissa watching her with nothing but concern in her eyes.
"Please just accept that you need some sleep." begged Marissa
Bianca looked guiltily back down to her lap.
"Only if you say you can forgive me. I didn't mean to…"
"I forgive you." said Marissa, giving her a small smile in return.
There was another long moment of uncomfortable silence as a resigned Bianca settled onto the mattress and curled onto her side while Marissa sat what felt a million miles away on the edge of AJ's bed.
Bianca closed her eyes, wracked with guilt, wondering desperately where the anger had come from. It was so hard to accept how much things had changed, but Marissa was hardly the one to blame. It just seemed to Bianca that all Marissa had done lately was remind her of her frailty when all she wanted to do was forget. Marissa was only looking out for her when she should really be looking out for herself. Why did it have to be so hard?
Lying there, Bianca tensed when she heard the sound of Marissa getting up from AJ's cot followed by the swish of the curtains being pulled closed. The bed then shook slightly as Marissa came to lay beside her. Bianca sighed, feeling, after her outburst, she wasn't worthy as her girlfriend spooned against her back and held her in her arms.
Bianca felt a soft kiss against her neck.
"I love you." Marissa whispered.
"I don't deserve you." Bianca whispered in return.
Marissa gave her a second kiss closer to her jaw.
"Just try and sleep." she soothed.
Bianca's wild thoughts settled with the warmth of Marissa's embrace.
"I'm sorry." she whispered once more.
Marissa didn't reply, only held her tighter.
…
Marissa lay beside Bianca, relieved when her girlfriend's breathing evened out and her limbs grew heavy. She was finally asleep.
Marissa considered getting up but she was so comfortable lying there with Bianca in her arms she decided to stay as she was.
Her head was still spinning from the fight, if you could call it that. It was the first angry words they'd exchanged… at least as far as she could remember… Marissa wasn't sure how it started. From what she could tell Bianca's angry outburst seemed to stem from her frustration at the whole situation. Her girlfriend was so determined to prove to everyone, especially the kids, that she was fine when plainly deep down she knew she wasn't. Maybe they should have just stayed in Pine Valley and faced the media; this new environment was clearly beginning to take its toll on Bianca while she was still in recovery.
The worst part was, Marissa knew she was partly to blame, too busy fussing over Bianca rather than noticing the real issue. She could have kicked herself at her own double standards. When her name exploded in the press, she didn't want to talk about it or think about it, she just wanted to hide away from the problem in her lovers arms… how was Bianca's behaviour any different? Why didn't she just let her kiss her?
…
Marissa was deep in contemplation when there was a quiet knock at the door.
Bianca moaned slightly in her sleep but didn't stir.
Marissa gently pulled away from Bianca's warm body, covering her with the bed covers before stumbling towards the door. Were the kids back from the stunt show already… or was there a problem with Gabby...
Marissa opened to door to see someone she wasn't expecting.
"What are you doing here!" she exclaimed.
…