And now for something a little bit different! Oh, and Ashley is not my friend's real name; however, she is a friend I had in high school. Thanks for reviewing, Andrea and chocykitty, but if I put anyone else in, it would be Luna.

It was a week after it happened, and things didn't look like they'd changed too much on the outside. I mostly chilled with the boys. But still, things had changed, for me at least. After asking about my sexual preferences, I couldn't stop thinking about it. I needed some advice, but I couldn't ask any of the boys. Luckily, I knew someone who I could ask for help in any situation like this.

For the first time in several weeks, I texted my friend Ashley, and for once, she wasn't busy and came over. My text read: Urgent talk! Over here ASAP!

Ashley texted back: On my way!

I explained to her on the way into my house "You're the only one I know who's had experience with this, and I trust you." We went into my room, after I'd briefly introduced her to the boys (in the case of most of them, under aliases).

"So," Ashley said, her brown eyes gleaming, "What's up?"

"I better start from the beginning." I said. Ashley could keep a secret, and so I entrusted her and only her with the information I gave her. "Did you ever read the Harry Potter series?"

Ashley's eyes widened. "Have I read them? Are you actually asking me that?"

"You don't read." I pointed out.

"Oh, that doesn't count! Jamie's read them too!" (Jamie was her high school best friend). "I mean, I'm not into them now, but I have read them. Not the last couple books, though."

"That's okay." I said. "But set this to stunned. I am living with five boys, that you've just met. But you don't know their real names."

Ashley tilted her head. "Um, you're not going to tell me that they're characters, are you?"

I sighed and smiled. "Ask them if you don't believe me. I know it's unbelievable, especially after that imaginary boyfriend thing in middle school." (Don't ask, I was a kid then.) "Even ask them an identification question."

She actually did do it, asking Draco why Buckbeak attacked him in third year, etc. She made sure Sirius had run away to live with the Potters at sixteen, that James had only started dating Lily in seventh year, that Remus had first been infected with lycanthropy when he was very little. She didn't ask Peter anything.

However, after she'd asked them, she turned to me and asked "Are they cosplaying or something?"

"Not that I know of." I smiled. "OK, boys, time to do some magic. Just do something simple, and yes, James, Sirius, I'm looking at you!"

Sirius exchanged glances with his friends and said "I told you she couldn't keep her eyes off me."

"Save it, Black." I interjected. "Just levitate something with the standard incantation, OK?" They did so with 'Wingardium Leviosa', and it was enough to convince Ashley.

"Hey, Draco," I said, remembering his ability to detect magic. "Is she magic?"

Draco looked Ashley up and down, then shook his head. "No. There's no magic coming from her at all."

The two of us resumed the conversation in my room as I related the events of last night.

"Wait...this actually happened to you?" Ashley asked disbelievingly. When I nodded, she burst out laughing. "Wow, I didn't think that would happen! I mean, you almost lost it to a fictional character?"

"Hey, at the moment, he's very much real!" I pointed out.

"I guess he is the hottest here." Ashley admitted. "The girls at school must've liked him. Shame he lost his looks in Azkaban."

"Keep your voice down!" I hissed. "I'm not telling them about that!"

"Whoa, whoa, sorry." Ashley said. "I didn't know, I didn't know."

"Anyway, I wanted to ask for your advice, Ash." I said, knowing the blood was rushing to my face, making it dark pink and then red. "When I asked, Sirius told me that I was especially...er... responsive to some things in particular. Like being told what to do, provided I'm okay with whatever's going on. I'm asking you because I know you have the most experience. Thing is, Draco is super-jealous of how close I am with the others. And as if that wasn't enough, I don't just have a crush on Sirius. I sort of have a little crush on Remus, too. He's just too nice not to love."

"Tough." Ashley mused, her dark brown eyes narrowed in thought. "We all know that you have to choose someone. Cliché as old as storytelling and all that jazz. It's like that song you wrote in Year Eleven. Remember, it was called 'Two Fictional Guys'?"

I cringed. I wrote my own lyrics to existing songs, and at the time, I had a crush on two different characters. My latest song was one I wrote before Draco came into my head, when I still had a crush on him - "Save A Broomstick, Ride A Wizard", based on "Save A Horse, Ride A Cowboy".

But I nodded. "I know. And that's not the only complication. I'm pretty sure that neither of them can be in a steady relationship."

"Why not?" Ashley asked.

"You didn't know about Sirius' reputation during school?" I questioned. "He was known as the man-whore of the school. The girls couldn't stay away from him, and he took advantage of the effect he had on them. Honestly, I read this one fanfiction that had one of the prefects walking in on him and some girl in a deserted classroom, and the next time they met, he was with another girl."

Ashley nodded. "But Remus isn't like that, is he?" She looked confused.

"Of course he isn't!" I assured her. "It's too bad you haven't read 'Half-Blood Prince' cause that would explain a bit more about why I couldn't date him."

Ashley tilted her head. "Is this something to do with the werewolf thing?"

"Mm-hm." I nodded. "In the books, he refused to acknowledge Tonks' obvious love for him cause he felt that he wasn't good enough for her. And when they had a kid, if you got to that bit...he was scared that he would've passed the werewolf gene onto him."

"So even if he felt the same way about you, he'd try to deny it." Ashley thought out loud. "What about Draco? You said he was jealous."

"Yes, because he was here first, and we were together for over a month." I explained, realizing I hadn't mentioned it before. "Thing is, I broke up with him partly because he was being jealous. But the main reason was because he was trying to push me too far. He kept tonguing me and wouldn't stop until I ran. He even threatened to use the Imperius Curse on me. Not to mention that he was the one who spiked my drink last night!"
"Imperius Curse...don't remember that one." Ashley said, narrowing her eyes in thought.

"It's one of the Unforgivables, along with the Crutacius Curse and Avada Kedavra." I explained. "The Imperius Curse forces the affected person to do what the witch or wizard wants until the curse is lifted. The only person that seems to have been able to fight it at all was Harry, and even he had his problems. The first time it was used on him, he tried to do what he was told and not do it at the same time."

Ashley's eyes were wide. "So if he used that on you, he could do pretty much anything?"

I nodded. "He nearly did use it on the last full moon. I had to use Levicorpus and Petrificus Totalus on him to keep him away from me. Truth be told...I'm scared, Ash. I'm actually scared."

Suddenly, a playful smile appeared on my friend's face. "Don't you get it? It's simple!"

"What?" I said, confused.

"You imagined these characters, right? They came out of your head, right?"

I nodded.

"So, all you have to do is think up a character that will give you the best advice!"

I groaned. "Nice try, Ash, but if I could choose which characters turned up, I'd also have the Trio, as well as dozens of cartoon characters." (My fanfictions vary. I've written Simpsons, Powerpuff Girls, Goosebumps, Animaniacs, Pokemon...I'd even gotten to Hey Arnold, which has an experienced advice-giver, but he's so dense with relationships – he's still clueless about the girl that's been in love with him for half a decade!)

Ashley sighed. "OK, OK. Then my advice is to...well, experiment. Keep your emotions out of it and just try stuff out."

"What?" I understood, but still..."You mean, like I have a friend with benefits?"

"You don't have to tell everyone, if you think it's so scandalous." Ashley giggled. "But yeah. Isn't it the best idea right now? I'm sure you have a Marauder out there that'll be all too willing to help you, sober or not. I'll ask him for you, if you like." She laughed again at my rapidly blushing face.

I thought this over carefully. Would I dare? Could I do it? Should I even be considering it?

I finally smiled. "Let's go."

I just hope no one thinks I'm really that reckless. Don't worry, precautions will be taken. This is nothing light. Please review!