Gravity
Disclaimer: I don't own anything or anyone from The Vampire Diaries.
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June 12th 2017
Monday 1.15am
South Hill
"So Damon, what's your story?" I roll my eyes at the flirty bartender in front of me. Klaus chuckles from beside me and I send him a glare, still pissed off that he told her my name.
"I don't have a story." I reply bluntly.
Klaus scoffs mockingly beside me but I ignore him.
"Oh come on, everyone has a story."
"Yeah Damon, everyone has a story." Klaus nudges me with an amused smirk on his face.
"Yeah well not me." I huff and finish my bourbon. "Can I get another?" The girl, whose name I have already forgotten seems disheartened by my lack of interest as she turns around to refill my drink.
"What are you doing?" I snap at Klaus in annoyance. "I'm not interested."
"Oh come on Damon, when was the last time you got laid?" He challenges me. "She's hot and is clearly into you."
"Not interested."
The barmaid returns at this point, sliding the glass along the bar towards me. I pay her quickly, turning away but unfortunately she doesn't seem to take the hint.
"So...does your girlfriend always let you out of her sight or is this a special occasion?"
Wow very subtle.
"He doesn't have a girlfriend." Klaus answers for me before I get the chance to reply.
"I find that hard to believe." She stares at me with a flirtatious smile.
"Just because I'm single doesn't mean I'm available." I stress while sending them both pointed looks. I look back at the now slightly disappointed barmaid. "You're a pretty girl but I'm going to be upfront about this - sorry but I'm just not interested." I turn to Klaus. "Stop trying to hook me up with girls - it's not going to happen." I grab my drink and walk away from the bar feeling more than a little annoyed. Klaus and Stefan just don't seem to understand the fact that I'm not interested in hooking up with random girls.
I head towards the thankful empty dart board and start to play on my own. I feel footsteps on the old creaking wooden floor behind me but I don't bother to turn around.
"You ready to admit it yet?"
I throw the dart hard against the board, watching as it hits with a thud.
"Admit what?" I reply gruffly.
"That you and Elena are dating." I hear the humor in his voice but I'm not impressed so I ignore him. "Oh come on, Damon, how can you keep denying it? You two are literally going out on dates like two times a week."
"We're hanging out. That's what friends do." I answer sharply. "Is this a date?" I snap.
"Oh don't give me that bullshit, Damon. What's the big deal? Just admit it. You love her, she clearly still loves you."
"It's complicated."
"Do you love her, yes or no?" He questions me bluntly and I down the rest of my bourbon.
"Of course I do." I mumble quietly. "I'll probably always love her. It's not a simple case of me loving her or not. She's got a completely different life. We've always been from different worlds, now more than ever."
"I don't know Damon..." He eyes me warily. "If we were back in those high school days I would have agreed to you. However nobody is standing in your way now, she's a big girl who no longer lets her family control her. Your relationship wouldn't have to be a secret anymore."
"It's really not that simple."
"It seems pretty simple to me. You're pretty much in a relationship with the girl already but without the added bonus of sex. You're depriving yourself for the sake of what? Self-loathing?"
"I'm not self-loathing." I huff.
"Yes it is. So she goes to college, so freaking what?! Plenty of people do the whole long distance thing and it's not as if she's miles away. It's a two hour drive to Whitmore, less without traffic. You've been driving up there enough lately to know that for yourself."
"Are you really going to preach about the success of long distance relationships considering that was the reason you and Caroline broke up?" I fire back, immediately regretting it when I see his face drop. I silently curse myself for bringing her up, especially since this is the first time we have hung out properly and happily since he beat up my brother over the damn girl.
"That was different." He frowns. "Caroline never loved me the way Elena clearly loves you." I swallow hard at that and look down at my glass. "Damon…she comes back to our fucked up boring town every weekend just to see you."
"She didn't come back this weekend." I reply but immediately realizing how unfair that comment is. The only reason Elena didn't make it back to Mystic Falls this weekend is because she has an exam on Monday morning and she's locked in her dorm room studying.
"I may not go to college but even I know its finals week." He rolls his eyes and I stay silent because he's right. "Have you asked her what her plans are for the summer?"
I shrug. "Not really…but she's made it pretty obvious she'll be back in Mystic Falls. I suppose she doesn't have much choice what with Ric and Jenna's wedding. She's maid of honor, she has to be here."
"She has to be here on the day of the wedding." Klaus replies. "You know she barely came home for the last three years, right? Every summer, she would stay on campus. I know this because Caroline used to always whine about it. Sure she'd visit the odd weekend, sometimes maybe even a week, but never for the full summer."
"Maybe that's still the case." I frown, because she's never actually mentioned it either way. She always talked about not being able to wait to just enjoy the time off, she's even planned some things for us to do together but that's not to say that she'd be coming back to Mystic Falls for the whole time. I just assumed that she would but...
We could road trip to the beach from Whitmore. The movie she's desperately been waiting for the summer release date and she wants to drag me along to, doesn't have to be seen in a screen in our cinema in Mystic Falls.
I take a deep breath and throw the next dart in an attempt to end the conversation.
I suppose I'll find out by next weekend what Elena's summer plans are.
"You need to do something, Elena." Bonnie nags at me as we finish packing up my car. "It's your 21st birthday!"
"I'm not saying I don't want to do anything. I just don't want to turn it into a big deal when it's not." I slam closed my trunk with a loud sigh. I glance back at the dormitory building behind us with a feeling of relief.
Summer has officially started.
I had my last exam yesterday; Bonnie finished hers this morning and we can finally relax for nearly four whole months. Caroline unfortunately doesn't have her final deadline until next week. We offered to stay with her but she pretty much shooed us away. Secretly I think she's relieved she has to stay a little while longer, she still hasn't even told her Mom that she's pregnant.
I think if Caroline had it her way she would hide away in our dorm room for the whole summer and then finally make an appearance back to Mystic Falls around Christmas, new-born baby in tow!
"It is a big deal!" Bonnie brings me back from my wandering thoughts. "Remember Caroline's? She pretty much threw a rave and invited the entire campus."
"Well we can't exactly do that now in Caroline's condition can we?"
"Just because Caroline got herself pregnant doesn't mean you still can't go out and have fun." Bonnie replies pointedly as we both jump into my car. "Unless…you already have something planned with another Salvatore boy?" she teases curiously.
I tut loudly. "No."
"Nothing?"
"He hasn't even mentioned it." I start the engine roughly. It's not that I'm mad Damon's hasn't brought up my birthday…I just…I kind of hoped he would have suggested us doing something by now.
"You haven't seen him all week though? Maybe when you guys meet up next he'll bring it up. Plus he's a guy, guys always forget birthdays." Bonnie offers me reassuringly. "You probably just need to remind him."
"Damon knows when my birthday is." I reply confidently. That's one thing I'm sure of. He often drops jokey comments about how soon he won't have to go to the bar for me to get me a drink.
"Maybe he's planning something?"
I stay silent because the thought has crossed my mind but I quickly pushed it back. The last thing I wanted to do was get carried away with excitement or ahead of myself. Damon doesn't owe me anything.
No expectations equals no disappointment.
"He's not my boyfriend anymore, Bonnie." I hate the way my voice gives away how disappointment I sound. "He doesn't owe me anything. We're just friends."
"Right." Bonnie rolls her eyes. "You guys are pretty much dating, you know that right?"
I frown defensively. "We're friends."
"Friends who date." Bonnie fires back. "There's nothing wrong with it, Elena."
"I know that." I huff in annoyance. Trust me, the last thing that's going to stop Damon and I dating are other people's opinions. We've learned from that mistake. "But we're still not dating."
"But you want to be?"
I swallow hard before nodding slowly. "Fine, yes. You got me. I do want to be with him but it's not about what I want."
"Oh come on."
"It's not, Bonnie." I reply sadly. "Damon's been through so much. Everything is going to be on his terms and I'm more than happy to do that."
"I think you're wrong." She replies bluntly and I tense.
"What?"
"I think you're wrong. You're sugar-coating this whole thing to make it seem like you're doing the right thing by Damon but really it's because you're scared." She accuses me. "You're scared that if you put yourself out there that he'll reject you."
I clench my jaw tightly.
"Well guess what, Elena, he might reject you. He might turn you away and break your heart but at least then you'd know you tried. Instead you're stuck in this weird limbo with him we're you're pretty much in a relationship without any of the benefits. It's not healthy."
"What's not healthy is us both rushing into something we're both not ready for!"
"Whose not ready for it? You've never stopped loving him. You need to tell him before it's too late. You need to finally do something about it." She tells me bluntly and I swallow hard, blinking back unshed tears.
She's right about me being scared. Having Damon in my life as a friend is so much better than not having him in my life at all. I'm scared that if I do tell him I want to be with him and he rejects me that it would ruin what we have right now. It would ruin the easiness and carefree fun that we're having.
It would ruin our friendship and I don't know if I'm ready to give that up just yet.
"So, have you told Dad about the baby yet?" I question Stefan curiously while throwing him the football in the town square. He is officially home for the summer and our Dad is still oblivious to the fact that he is about to become a grandfather.
"No." He frowns as he catches the ball and throws it straight back. "I'm trying to avoid the inevitable anger and disappointment. He'll go ballistic, Mom will cry."
I chuckle slightly. "Don't you just love the irony of Giuseppe's first grandchild also being the grandchild of the sheriff?"
Stefan groans loudly. "Shit, I didn't even think of that." He catches the ball again as I throw it back. "He's going to kill me."
"Yup." I agree, not even attempting to try and make him feel better. "Either him or the sheriff." I laugh and he glares at me. "Has Caroline told her yet?"
Stefan shakes his head. "God no. She's still at Whitmore. It seems avoidance is the only thing we have in common these days." He frowns and I stop. We move from the grass area onto the park bench, taking a seat. I sigh against the warm sun, it feels good.
"You two not getting along?"
"She resents me for getting her pregnant," he rolls his eyes slightly. "She doesn't seem to grasp the fact that it takes two. Apparently it's all my fault."
"That'll just be the hormones talking." I try to reassure him but I know from Elena how dramatic Caroline can be. "She'll come around. Once she accepts that this baby is real and this is actually happening she'll loosen up."
"Or her hormones will get worse and she'll hate me even more." He leans his elbows onto his knees and puts his head in his hands. "I'm too young to be dealing with this."
I chuckle and pat him on the back. "That's what you get for having unprotected sex."
"We were protected." He grumbles. "I should sue the birth control company." He leans back up and squints against the bright sun. "I know that it will get better. I believe that it will get better, but I'm still getting used to the idea that I'm going to be a Dad."
"I'm sure once you have your ultrasound appointments and all those birthing and baby classes it will soon sink in." I smirk as his face pales. I know he's terrified, and I don't blame him, but deep down I know he'll be a good father.
He may still be a college student but when it comes down to it he can be mature. I mean, he pretty much single handed got out me out of a life prison sentence. If he can manage to pull that off I'm sure he'll be able to manage looking after a baby!
I jump slightly when my vision goes black and a pair of hands land on my eyes. "Guess who?" A familiar soft voice whispers into my ear and I smirk.
I grab onto her wrists, keeping her hands firmly in place over my eyes. "Hmm…a surprise stripper?"
"No!" She giggles and I smile at the sound.
"Damn." I squeeze her wrists gently. "A playboy model?"
"Try harder…"
"Hmm. I know. A very beautiful pre-grad creative writing and literature college student who just so happens to be back in Mystic Falls after a long stressful week of final exams and hand-in deadlines?"
"Finally!" Elena laughs and removes her hands from my eyes, walking around the bench to face me. "I was just passing by in the car with Bonnie and saw you. Figured it would be rude if I didn't stop to come say hello."
"Well I'm glad you did." I grin, glancing over my shoulder to see Bonnie stood patiently by Elena's car. "You just get back to town?"
"Yup." She smiles happily. "We haven't even been home yet. We were just on the way over to Bonnie's house now to unload her stuff."
"Just Bonnie's?" I question curiously, thinking back to my previous conversation with Klaus about Elena's intentions for this summer.
"Mine too." She smiles softly and my smile widens. However her smile drops slightly and she grimaces. "I'm staying with the parents. Jenna told me I could crash at hers for the summer but I know that she's pretty bombed with the wedding plans and work. The last thing she needs is a bored student hanging around all day every day."
"I'm sure you'll find things to do to keep you busy."
"I'm sure I will." She replies with a smile.
"Elena!"
She looks over my shoulder to Bonnie who seems to be getting impatient.
"Well, I've got to go." She looks back down at me. "Are you working tonight?"
"I am. Start at six."
"Maybe I'll pop in for some dinner and a lemonade." She winks at me and bite on my bottom lip to stop my growing smile.
"I'll keep a spot at the bar open for you."
"Great!" she beams before taking a step back. "I'll see you later then!" She glances briefly at my brother who has remained silent through this entire exchange. "Bye Stefan, bye Damon!" she pretty much skips away and I smile and shake my head.
I turn back to my front and Stefan is staring at me with a strange look on his face.
"What?" I ask with a frown.
"You sure you know what you're doing?"
My frown deepens. "Don't start, Stefan."
He holds up his hands defensively. "I just don't want to see you get hurt by her again."
I clench my jaw. "Well that's not going to happen, Stefan." I snap. "I think you have enough of your own problems to worry about right now than to be getting involved in mine don't you think?"
"Fine." He sighs loudly. "But don't say I didn't warn you."
"Honestly, no words can describe that feeling of relief when I walked out of that exam hall." Elena sips on her lemonade which may or may not have a snippet of vodka in it. I can see the relief and joy on her face from finishing college for the summer. She's practically glowing.
"No more stress for the whole summer." I agree. "You need to just relax and enjoy yourself."
"Oh I plan too." She grins. "This is the first full summer I will be spending back in Mystic Falls since we left town."
"Yeah…" I raise my eyebrows at her curiously. "Ric mentioned something about that. How come you never came back before?"
She stays silent for a moment, taking a sip from her straw but her eyes never leave mine. She pushes her glass back slightly. "I guess I never had a reason to until now."
My heart speeds up but luckily I'm saved by the bell, or at least another customer shouting for my attention. I send her an apologetic smile before heading along the bar to serve the impatient lady.
When I get back, Elena changes the subject to how this time Jeremy is the one who won't be coming home.
"Where did little Gilbert end up anyway?" I ask curiously.
"California." She laughs slightly. "It suits his laid back lazy attitude perfectly."
I chuckle and agree. I don't think I'll ever be that kids biggest fan but I know how much Elena loves him. "College?"
"Yup. California Institute of Arts." She pulls a face. "Mom was proud; Dad wanted him to go to med school. Jeremy had other ideas."
"Just like his big sister huh?" I smirk and she shrugs with a smile. "Poor Dad, two creative kids when all he wanted was academia."
She smirks slightly and shrugs. "Well that's his problem. There's a reason Jeremy is choosing to spend half of his summer in California."
"What about the other half?"
"Thailand." She pouts. "So jealous."
"Lucky for some, huh?"
"Yeah his student loans are going to great use." She rolls her eyes and I smile. I sense a touch of sibling jealousy.
"Enough about your annoying kid brother. What are you doing Sunday night?" I ask her curiously. She blinks slightly surprised by my sudden subject change but I couldn't hold it off any longer without completely chickening out.
"Um…I don't think I have anything planned. I'm going shopping with Jenna and my Mom during the day but nothing else."
"Well it's my night off so why don't you come over to my place? I'll cook you dinner."
I swear I see her cheeks heating up, a faint blush covering her face. "Um…yeah." She smiles, "Dinner sounds good."
"Perfect."
I'm surprised when I arrive home to see the living room light on. It's late and my parents would usually be asleep by now or my Dad at work if he's on the night shift.
I close the door quietly, wanting nothing more than to just go straight to bed but apparently luck isn't on my side.
"Elena?"
I cringe, stepping further along the hall and peeking into the lounge where my Dad is sitting in his usual chair, a newspaper in his hand.
"You're home late."
"You're up late." I reply harsher than I intended. The downside about coming home this summer is my parents still treating me like a child. They need to understand that as much as I appreciate them for putting me up, I'm not a teenager anymore. I can come and go as I please. I don't have curfews.
"I've had a tough day at work." He replies, ignoring my harsh tone. "I just wanted to unwind a little before I went to bed."
I nod slowly. "Okay, well I'm tired so I'm going to head up. Goodnight."
"Elena," he calls after me and I stop, turning back around. "Can we talk?"
"Dad I'm tired."
"Sweetheart, when was the last time we had a proper conversation? You're still my little girl. I know you're mad at me but I miss you. I miss our relationship." He looks at me with a painful look on his face that sends a wave of guilt into my gut. "Please sit down."
I tense, trying my best to remain calm but follow his instruction and take a seat on the couch. "Dad, you know why I'm upset with you."
"I do." He agrees. "But I also wish you would be a little more understanding to the reasoning behind it. Everything I do is to protect you. It's to protect this family."
I shake my head. "You did it because you wanted Damon out of my life. What better way to do it then making sure he was locked up on a life sentence huh?"
"Elena how can you say that when I'm the one who got him out of there?" He argues. "I know I may have gone about it the wrong way but I had to be careful. If the wrong person found out what I was doing then it wouldn't have taken long for Zach Salvatore to hear about it and Damon wouldn't be a free man right now - that I can tell you for sure."
"But you didn't need to lie to me! You didn't need to manipulate me into thinking it was hopeless." I try to fight the tears.
I am so sick of crying.
"You're right," he admits quietly. "I shouldn't have done that. I shouldn't have lied to you over and over again and I shouldn't have hid what I was doing with Stefan from you either. However at the time I genuinely believed what I was doing was the right thing. You were crushed, you were completely heartbroken. One day when you have kids of your own you will understand why I lied. You will understand how awful it feels to see your child wake up every morning hollow and broken. You were a shell of your old self, you weren't concentrating in school, and you barely spent any time with your friends despite their best efforts. The only thing that you cared about was Damon. It wasn't healthy. I wanted you to concentrate on your education; I wanted you to move forward with your life. I wanted you to go to college and have fun. If you knew that there was even the slightest chance that there was something out there that could have helped Damon you never would have been able to do that. You probably wouldn't be standing here right now. I dread to think what would have happened." He sounds sad and I swallow the lump in my throat as I think back to my senior year of high school.
I was hollow. I was broken.
I felt completely destroyed.
I think over his last sentence. It's oddly a little familiar to Damon's attitude these days. We can't change the past. If things had happened differently we wouldn't be here right now. I almost smile at the irony.
I run my hand down my face tiredly. "This isn't something that I can just forgive overnight, Dad."
"I understand that," he swallows hard. "I know I've hurt you and that breaks my heart. You're my little girl; it crushes me to think that you might hate me."
"I don't hate you."
He smiles slightly. "Well that is a relief."
I offer him a smile, however tiny it might be. "You need to know something." I tell him sternly and he glances at me a little surprised. "I'm an adult now, I'm going to make decisions that you might not agree with but they are my decisions. You can't stop me from living my life the way I want to live it." I stand up, taking in his slightly stunned face. "Just remember that for future reference, okay?"
He clears his throat but nods slowly anyway. "Goodnight Elena."
"Goodnight Dad."
"Come on in." I smile as I open the door to Elena. She returns it with one that is ten times brighter but that is Elena all over. She gives me a quick hug, something I've noticed she's been doing more and more lately when we see each other.
"Hmm something smells delicious." She lets out a noise of appreciation as she slips off her shoes. "When you said you would make me dinner I kind of thought takeout or frozen." She sends me a cheeky smile.
"Hey! I've cooked for you in the past." I remind her pointedly.
"Very rarely." She hits back with raised eyebrows.
"But when I did you always loved it, right?"
"Of course," she grins. "You're an amazing cook…" she smirks. "When you choose to actually do it."
I chuckle and lead her over to the couch. I place my hands on her shoulders. "Sit." I push her down and she giggles. "Dinner won't be long. Do you want a drink? I've got beer, bourbon or water." I cringe slightly. "So it's rather limited."
"Don't worry," She lets out a small laugh. "A beer will be fine."
"One beer coming right up." I head over to the kitchen, quickly checking on the food before pulling out two beers.
"Where's Klaus tonight?" Elena questions me curiously as I pass her the bottle.
"Obligatory weekend trip to the family lake house." I smirk. "He won't be back until tomorrow."
"It must be cramped living here; it doesn't seem big enough to hold the two of you." Elena notes as she scans the apartment with her eyes.
"It's not exactly ideal." I admit. "But it's better than a halfway house and it's definitely better than moving back into the boarding house." I shrug and take a sip from my own beer. "It's a temporary arrangement; I'm planning on getting my own place eventually. I just can't really afford it right now."
She nods in understanding, "but at least you have a steady job now, right? That should help."
"It definitely helps." I nod in agreement. "And since half of the staff are part time high school students, they aren't shy to ask someone to cover their shift when they've received a better offer than waiting tables all night."
Elena giggles slightly. "Winner!"
"I know, right?" I wiggle my eyebrows at her playfully and she giggles again. I smile, glancing back over to the kitchen. "Ah, dinner is almost ready." I head back over towards the kitchen.
"Can I help with anything?" Elena shouts over.
"No baby, you just sit back and relax!" I call back but immediately freeze when I realize the pet name that slipped out of my mouth. I feel my cheeks heating up. Shit. That wasn't meant to come out. I don't even know where that came from.
I swallow hard and continue to move around the kitchen, my back to the lounge area. Hopefully Elena didn't notice, she hasn't said anything but that doesn't necessarily mean she isn't thinking about it. I continue to serve up our dinner and take a deep breath. I turn around. "Dinner is served!" I call out casually and place down both our plates onto the small dining table.
Elena smiles softly at me and takes her seat. She eyes the food with a smile. "It looks yummy."
"It tastes yummy too," I wink at her easily and her smile widens. "Dig in!"
After dinner I decided I would quickly run to our local liquor store and pick up some wine. Elena protested at first, but I insisted we were celebrating the end of her finals and junior year.
She couldn't argue with that one and soon enough we were back on our couch, two large glasses in our hands.
I take a sip and lean back. "I didn't think I would miss wine in prison." I murmur quietly.
Elena glances at me curiously. "What else did you miss?"
I smile. "Good food. Oh man, I missed fast food too." I chuckle slightly. "Those dinners they served us weren't even good enough for a dog to eat."
I feel her shuffle closer beside me, her shoulder touching mine. "I'm sorry."
"It's fine." I tap her arm gently for a moment. "Trust me; the food wasn't the worst part about being in that place." She frowns, a distant look on her face. "I missed hot showers. I mean…the ones we had were supposed to be hot but they never really were – you were lucky if you got a luke-warm cubicle. I missed soft mattresses…it felt so good my first night not to feel like I was sleeping on a slab of cold metal and nothing else. The beds were even worse than some of the motels we stayed in that summer."
She's silent, and I can tell immediately that she's thinking. She's always thinking about something when I bring up my life in prison.
"Damon, can I ask you a question?" She's nervous. I wonder how long she's been holding this in. It's been weeks since we've been friends again and I know that she's been holding back.
"Of course you can, Elena." I try to remain casual. This could be anything but I know that it's not.
"Why did you plead guilty?"
I tense immediately. Oh God. I have been dreading this question from the moment I was released. Nobody knows about what happened the night I was taken back to Mystic Falls, not even Stefan, Ric, or Klaus.
I didn't tell anyone.
I still haven't told anyone.
"Elena…"
"Please." She practically begs me. "I've been asking myself for years, I need to know. Why did you give up? You could have pleaded not guilty…you could have fought. You could have gone to trial and made it easier for my Dad and your lawyers to prove your innocence. Why did you just give up and accept a life sentence in prison?" Her voice cracks and I see the tears resting in her eyelids. "Why did you leave me?"
I cringe slightly. I've always felt guilty for never giving Elena a true explanation. I didn't have a choice, I had to shut her out, I had to push her away. If she knew the truth it would have only put her in more danger.
"Elena it wasn't that simple…" I jump to my feet, suddenly needing distance between us.
Elena looks up at me broken and it hits me hard in the gut. The tears have fallen now but she's silently crying. I don't think I could have taken the sound.
"It seems pretty simple to me." Her voice keeps cracking. "You had a choice, to either plead guilty and go to prison for the rest of your life or not guilty…and fight for your freedom. Fight for us and our future." She moves to her feet too and I take a step back. "I know I gave up…but you gave up first, Damon!"
I clench my jaw tight. "You think I gave up first? Everything I did, I did it to protect you!"
"God!" she groans loudly. "Why do people keep saying that?! I don't need protecting! I'm not some naïve little girl anymore! Stop treating me like I'm a porcelain doll!"
I shake my head, my hands tighten into a fist by my sides. "Elena…just drop it!"
"No, Damon!" She steps forward again. "I won't just drop it! I can't keep this inside of me anymore! Why won't you just tell me the truth?" her voice lowers again and I can see the desperation.
"If I tell you the real reason it's just going to hurt you," I reply guiltily. "I don't want to hurt you."
She looks a little startled by my response. "Damon…please…whatever it is, you can tell me!" she steps closer again and clutches my hands tightly in hers. "Damon..."
I close my eyes. I take a deep breath. "Zach threatened to kill you if I didn't plead guilty." I let out an exhale and Elena gasps.
I see her eyes widen, her shaking hands let go of mine and one slowly rises to cover her mouth.
"Wh-what?" she stutters out stunned.
"I did it to protect you." I repeat my comment quietly.
"No." She shakes her head taking a big step back away from me. "No. You're lying…you're…no…"
"Elena…"
"Damon please." A sob falls from her lips and I cringe. "Please tell me that's not true. Please tell me you didn't spend the last four years of your life in prison because of me."
"It wasn't because of you, Elena." I try to reassure you. "Even if I pleaded differently there was nothing to say that I still wouldn't have been sent down anyway."
She shakes her head furiously. "We don't know that! We don't know what would have happened…" another sickly sob leaves her lips. "Oh God." She's crying now and it's breaking my heart. "Why…why didn't you tell someone? You could have told my Dad or Sheriff Forbes! They could have helped you!"
"Zach would have found out, Elena! I couldn't risk it…I would never risk your life like that." I take a step forward towards her.
"But…" tears are flowing fast down her face. "You…Oh god…" she's sobbing and I reach out, my hand landing on her arm. "Don't!" she gasps and steps back. "Don't…I don't deserve your sympathy! I don't deserve anything from you!"
"Elena that's not true!"
"Why don't you hate me, Damon? You should hate me!"
My heart literally feels like it's breaking. She looks so devastated. "Elena, I could never hate you!"
"Why not? I hate me! Oh God..."
"Elena no!" I grunt in frustration. "This is why I didn't want to tell you!"
She's shaking her head. She's not listening. She's probably never going to listen. It doesn't matter what I say.
She's broken.
I've broken her.
"Why did you do it?" She swallows hard. "I…you shouldn't have done that for me…"
I look at her like she's crazy. "Elena, what's wrong with you? Why wouldn't I have done what I did? I loved you! I loved you so much and I would do it all again in a heartbeat! I don't care who it comes down to, whether or not it's me or anyone else in this world! It will always be you. I will always choose you!" I pant breathlessly as the words escape my lips.
There's a look on her face that I can't figure out but God does it look familiar.
It doesn't take me long to remember.
Her lips slamming against mine kind of gives it away when she kisses me.
Sorry to leave it there folks! I hope you enjoyed this chapter…Damon finally told Elena the truth huh? There's still plenty more for them to discuss about that…when emotions aren't running as high of course!
Thank you again for reading and thank you even more for reviewing. I don't think I would be able to keep up this writing momentum if it wasn't for all your feedback and support, on here and on twitter! So thanks again!
Until next time!
