Hey guys, another light chapter with just a few heavy moments. I do warn that it will be next chapter when things get a bit rougher for Bella. So be prepared for that.

Thank you to Kyla713 for looking this over. Also, many thanks to Packeh, Heather and Nikki for putting up with me and reading this. All mistakes are my own.

Enjoy.

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Chapter 16-

The first night at the lake house was quiet. No hospital noises, no nurses and doctors rushing around. We didn't have to worry about IV machines going off every few hours. It was relaxing to just be in the moment with Bella.

My parents were off doing their own thing, while Charlie was upstairs, from the sounds of it, watching a Mariners game. I had Bella cuddled up next to me, her head on my shoulder as we swung on the swing out on the porch. It was a cool evening, the sun had just begun to go down, and the colors on the water painted a beautiful picture. If I was an artist, I doubt I could ever do it justice.

I held her closer to me, listening to her sighs as we continued to swing. I couldn't help myself, and constantly kissed the top of her head, just to remind myself to let things be and worry about the big stuff later, like the big looming cloud of chemo that hung over us now.

As the sun continued to set, I felt her hot breath on my neck as she kissed me softly just below my jaw, sending shivers up my spine. I pressed a kiss to the top of her head before looking back over the lake, watching the sun finally fall beneath the horizon. We stayed there awhile longer, swinging and enjoying the silence.

"How many more sunsets do you think I'll have?" I turned my head towards Bella, she was facing the lake, her eyes close as a lone tear slowly made its way down her cheek. I brushed it away with my thumb, all the while trying to think of something comforting to say and coming up empty. Because how does one answer something like that, when there's no real way of knowing for sure?

"I think you'll have so many sunsets left, that you'll get tired of the re-runs," I said, trying to lighten the mood.

Bella lifted her head and gave me a small smile. "I sometimes wish that the moment we are born, our parents are handed a paper that tells us how many years, months, days we have left on this earth. I hate the uncertainty. After this diagnosis, the uncertainty will be what I think kills me first before the chemo might."

My gut twisted in nerves and fear and I looked away, trying not to let my emotions overwhelm me. I didn't want that talk; I wasn't ready for it. I looked back over to Bella and took her hand in mine, twining our fingers together before I leaned in and kissed her lips softly. "Bella...I...you..." I was a mess. I sighed, holding her tighter against me. "You and God both need to realize something, and I hope that he can hear me. I can't live in a world where you don't exist. I just can't. I don't even want to think about it. As for God... Well, I'm not ready for him to take you away from me. He can't, I won't allow it. Why are you thinking about this? What can I do to calm your fears?"

I noticed her eyes then; they were brimming with tears ready to fall. "I love you, Edward, I really do. I just... the worry, the unknown...my fears are eating away at me. I feel like I'm falling apart, like I can't reconcile two different parts of me with the chemo looming. I have the part of me that is slowly dying, and the one that wants to fight like hell to live. But what if I don't have it in me? If the part I don't want to win, does? All of these thoughts are turning over and over in my head and I don't know how to deal. What is someone supposed to do when they get handed a cancer diagnosis? Wallow? Cower in fear? Go on like nothing happened? Why doesn't something serious like cancer come with a guidebook full of cheats?"

I wanted to hand her all of the answers that she needed, but I came up empty once again. My eyes looked up to the heavens, hoping that maybe some answer would magically shine down and help me, but obviously, none came. Multiple times, I opened and closed my mouth, and still no words of wisdom came.

The screen door slammed, and both our heads snapped up and saw Charlie standing there, his eyes wet, as if he'd been crying. He walked over to Bella and bent down in front of her, his hands on her knees.

"To hear your fears out loud and know that they coincide with mine is like a bucket full of ice being poured over my head. I'm your father, it's my job to protect you, but I couldn't protect you from this. Life's mysteries and unknowns are such bullshit, Bells." My eyes widened hearing Charlie curse. "I wish I had each and every answer, or better yet, that I could go through this for you. I wish so many impossible things, but I know that my daughter can fight with the best of them, that she can beat this cancer with a K.O. in the first round. I know that she will not give up, even when the going gets really tough."

Bella was sobbing once he finished, so Charlie stood up and pulled her into his arms, holding her. "Want to know what else I know, Bells?" She nodded and looked up at him. "I know that I will get to walk you down the aisle, and that we still have so many more memories to make. I know that I will get to say my daughter is a cancer survivor and you will outlive me by many years. So please enjoy your time here at the lake. Push all these negative thoughts aside, which I know is easier said than done. Just be, Bella. Relax." Charlie kissed the top of her head before pulling her back into a bone-crushing hug and whispered something in her ear that I couldn't make out, but I noticed the smile that lit Bella's face.

"Now, it's been a long day and I'm old, so I'm going to bed," Charlie told us just before a yawn overtook him. "Esme made you tea, Bells. Hopefully, it will help you sleep. I'll see you guys in the morning."

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My eyes blinked away the sleep as I stretched, my arms searching for Bella, but came up empty. I immediately bolted upright in bed, panic quickly taking over me. I looked toward the window, noticing the sun was just beginning to rise and the first morning light slowly filling the room. Our bedroom door was slightly ajar, the cabin silent.

I got out of bed and quickly got dressed, not at all bothering to take a shower. I headed downstairs, my eyes constantly searching for Bella. I finally noticed her sitting out on the dock, and I was immediately worried that it was possibly too cold for her. I didn't want her getting sicker.

Quietly, I made my way out to her. I sat down next to her and followed her gaze. She was looking out across the water, her knees pulled up to her chest.

"I wanted to see the sunrise," she said. "I couldn't sleep."

"You could have woken me up, Bella, I wouldn't have minded," I told her as I sat down next to her.

"I know, but you needed your sleep. You do so much for me. I wanted you to get some rest." She finally turned her head and looked at me, smiling and leaning in to kiss me.

"But you need your sleep, too."

"I have a feeling that I'll be getting a lot of sleep soon, so I might as well see the sunrise when I can." Her words constricted me. I wished she wouldn't think like that, but I guessed it was to be expected; that depression, anxiety and insomnia would set in.

"Bella, you're going to get so many sunrises, sunsets, rainy days, snow days and everything in between," I told her, emotion wavering in my voice.

"You and I both know there is no way of knowing that."

"We may not know it, Bella, but we can do our damnedest to make it possible." I grabbed her, pulling her into my arms. I moved her hair to the side and kissed her neck, up her jaw. "I love you. I love you so fucking much, that sometimes, I can't contain it. I'll watch you and can't help but smile. I'll check on you just to make sure you're still with me and breathing. I am scared, just as much as you are, maybe more. I'm a doctor and I should miraculously be able to hand you some meds to make this better and take it away, and I can't. It kills me that I can't. No one, especially you, should have to go through this."

She kissed me, long and slow, and then nuzzled her head on my shoulder. "I don't mean to be so sad. I don't want to feel like this. But it's so hard to be in the now like my dad said I should, when all I can do is worry about the future. A future I'm not even sure I'll have."

"You will, Bella. You'll see. You will," I said, squeezing her to me. "Now, let's go get breakfast. I have plans for us today that involved a lot of energy to be expended." I wiggled my eyebrows, hoping to be teasing. Bella slapped my shoulder and shook her head.

"My, my, my. My girl has a dirty mind. I simply meant a hike up to a special place I know of." Bella hid her face, a light blush seeping through her cheeks. "But don't worry, we'll get to that soon, too."

We then stood up and made our way back to the cabin, which was no longer silent. Mom was bustling around the kitchen, flipping pancakes. Dad was sipping coffee with Charlie as they listened to some radio sports broadcast. We walked in and all three of them smiled.

"About time you two showed up. My stomach is trying to eat itself," Dad said, laughing. "And Bella sits next to me. I called it first!"

Bella laughed, and it was such a pretty sound. I think my dad knew that she needed that. I watched as she sat down next to him, and he leaned in to hug her and tell her good morning.

"Edward, honey, can you please take Bella this strawberry banana smoothie for now?" Mom asked and I nodded, grabbing it and heading toward the table. I set it down in front of Bella before going and grabbing a coffee for myself. I couldn't help but smile as I poured it. My family was spoiling her, and I loved it. I loved that they cared that much.

"So, I was thinking, Bella. How about a barbecue tonight? Charlie and I are going to head into town in a few. Any requests?"

"Mint chocolate chip ice cream?" she asked, blushing.

"Well, that is a given. It is my job to keep you supplied of all your sweets, after all. But I was thinking along the lines of actual food, sweetheart."

"I know, Carlisle, just had to make sure you knew." She winked at my dad and smiled. "But you guys get whatever you want. All I ask for is cheeseburgers," she told them, and Charlie shook his head, grumbling that it was no surprise there.

Mom brought in the pancakes, bacon, sausage and eggs. We all began to eat, and I kept sneaking pieces of food onto Bella's plate, hoping she wouldn't notice and keep eating.

"I see what you're doing, Cullen. But I'll be nice this time and not complain. Now give me more bacon." I laughed and placed two more pieces of bacon onto Bella's plate.

Charlie and my dad left soon after, both of them making sure to hug Bella before they left. I then told Mom about my plans and where I was taking Bella. She smiled and said she'd pack us a picnic. As she went about that, I felt guilty we were leaving her there alone.

"I'll be fine. I plan to read a new book I bought. I have a feeling Bella might even like it, so I plan to give it to her when I'm finished. Now, go enjoy time with your girl."

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The hike up to a clearing was a bit long and I could tell Bella was getting tired. I told her to sit down and relax while I set up our picnic. I laid out a blanket, which she quickly stretched out on, smiling as the sun's warm rays hit her face. I placed the food all out around the blanket and set up our plates and drinks.

"You hungry?"

Bella nodded. "I could do with something, especially if your mom made it."

"Are you saying my cooking sucks?"

"Well... seeing as how this wasn't cooked...I can't make a fair assumption," she said, laughing as she rolled towards me. Her shirt slid down a bit, showing off her port. I tried to push the reminder away and stay in the moment with her.

"I've made you sandwiches before, so are you saying those sucked?" I asked, smiling.

"Hey, I can't help it if your mom makes tastier things than you do."

"Ah! The truth comes out now! I see how it is."

"Sorry to disappoint you, Edward." Laughing, she threw a grape at me and then started in on her sandwich.

It was nice to finally see her carefree and able to just be. Maybe now that she voiced some of her fears and worries, her shoulders wouldn't feel so heavy and she could enjoy her time there at the lake.

We ate in comfortable silence, shyly stealing glances at each other here and there. Lots of laughs and smiles were shared. I may have even tickled her at one point. She thought it would be funny to steal my grapes from my plate and I acted like I was mad, but in reality, I was happy she was eating. She needed all the strength she could get.

"It's beautiful here. Thank you for bringing me."

"You're welcome, sweet girl."

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When we returned to the cabin, Charlie and my dad were already setting up the grill. When they noticed we were back, my dad stole Bella and told me to go keep Mom company. I walked into the cabin, shaking my head and laughing. I stopped short with the realization of how good it felt to laugh myself.

"Your dad stole her, didn't he?"

"Yup, he did. Though, I don't mind. I love seeing Dad take to Bella the way he has."

"We love her, Edward. It feels natural to love her as much as we do. Your dad was telling Charlie earlier that she'll always be his daughter as well, even if you guys never marry. That took Charlie by surprise. Though, I think Charlie had a feeling as much. You should have seen them, Edward. Charlie was pulling out old baby pictures of Bella, and your dad was asking for copies. If I didn't know better, I'd have thought they were old gossiping women."

"Mom, it means a lot to me how much you guys love her." I kissed my mom's cheek. "Now, what can I help you with?"

We set about finishing up the sides to the barbecue. Once we were finished, we brought them out and placed them on the table out on the deck. I noticed my father and Bella missing, and only Charlie was manning the grill.

"They're out on the dock," Charlie said and handed me a beer, my gaze instantly finding them. They were both sitting on the side of the dock, feet in the water, Bella leaning into my dad as he placed his arm around her shoulders. The sight made me happy and warm inside.

Charlie clasped my shoulder, squeezing gently. "Your dad, he's a good man. I couldn't be happier with the family Bella has found."

"We love her, Charlie"

"You don't have to tell me that, I see it. Your dad, though, he surprised me, but I'm glad."

Bella's laughter drifted over to us as I watched her throw her head back as my dad splashed her again.

"It's the love that she has surrounding her that is gonna pull her through," Charlie said to me, bringing my attention back to him.

"I hope you're right."

"I know I'm right, Edward. Love is strong medicine in itself."

I sat down and sipped my beer, my eyes never leaving Bella and my dad. Bella eventually splashed my dad back, getting him good, but he just laughed and pulled her tighter into a hug. I selfishly wished that I knew what they were talking about, but I was also aware that whatever my dad was telling her was something she needed to hear. I could see from where I was sitting that she seemed lighter, happier and more in the moment than ever before.

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Thank you to each and every one of you that takes the time to read and review this story. Please know that it means a lot to me.

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