As I stand on the runway, waiting to enter the Olympic stadium for the last time, I wonder if I will step on the world's stage again. The gold medal weighs heavily around my neck, a testament to the skill I had to bring to bear inside the hostile climate of my idiotic teammates. Tonight, we have no national loyalties beyond our team jackets, however, and I see none of those hotheads near me. They've either flown home already or are far enough away from me to not taint this odd feeling of melancholy in my chest.
"You're too serious, Shintarō," Seijūrō says, touching me on the arm lightly. He's still not good with physical touch, but I know he is trying to lift me out of the funk I'm in. "When we walk into the stadium, look up at the crowd and hear them chanting our names."
"Don't be foolish, no one is shouting our names. This night isn't about us, it is about every Olympian who has made it through to the end."
"There is a small group; I can guarantee you that."
"How? I wasn't able to get tickets for even Kazu and Akira?" I ask chuckling, not the least bit surprised that he was able to succeed where I failed.
"I realized something the other night while we played with the Point Guard Poker Players," he answers, staring straight ahead. From my position, I can see lights reflecting off his golden eye, but it seems at peace. "We wouldn't have made it this far – I'm speaking of all of the Kiseki no Sedai, mind you – without the support of our friends and loved ones. I made some calls and appropriated The Akashi Foundation box for tonight. I wanted us all to be together again, if only for this one moment.
"Your father, he'll be –"
"Incensed, yes, indeed and that makes tonight even sweeter." He laughs and for a second I see a twinkle in his eyes that says he's going to be alright.
"Who else is up there?"
"Besides Kōki, Kazu, and Akira? Your parents, Tetsuya, of course, and Satsuki, Rinnosuke, Junpei, Yukio –"
"Who?"
"Kasamatsu. You'd think you'd know your husband's friends better than that, Shintarō, I'm disappointed in you," he scolds, smiling. "And then there are Tatsuya, and Reo's partner, Hiroshi. I don't believe you've met him yet; he's… much older than Reo. He teaches at Dokkyo University School of Medicine in Mibu. He wasn't what I expected when I learned that Reo had settled down, but he is exactly what a man like Reo needs, I suspect."
A spotlight flares to life in front of us without warning and I am monetarily blinded by the intense blue-white light. I clench my eyes closed, but even through the tightly shut lids, my eyes burn. I feel Seijūrō's gentle touch on the small of my back and he moves us forward. The crowd in front of us surges onto the track in time to the music and we are swept along. After a few seconds, the spotlight dims and I can open my eyes without pain. Seijūrō is still propelling me along, his other hand shading his eyes.
"We're clear," I say and he nods, dropping both his hands. I look up into the crowd, a million small flashes of light twinkle from cell phones like the stars that can't be seen with all the light pollution tonight. "Don't they know that their flashes won't do any good?" I ask.
"More than likely," he responds, "but they forget when they are caught up in this moment."
The band strikes up, playing the Olympic fanfare and we continue to march toward the seats designated for the athletes, coaches, and trainers who have remained for this last celebration. There seems barely any of us, compared to the opening night. Athletes from other countries swarm around us. Two men from the Japanese soccer team stop us and ask for selfies. A line forms behind them and soon we are enveloped by athletes from around the globe asking for pictures with the NBA stars. I smile through all of them, hoping that I won't disgrace my station as a star.
Soon enough we continue walking, but that feeling comes back, convincing me that this night is nothing like the first; it is so incongruent from that first time we walked this circle. Where I had been nervous yet arrogant then with the USA flag imprinted on my chest, tonight I feel deflated as if somehow the victory and medal are hollow because I did not earn them with the team of my choosing. I'll be glad to get back to New York and wear another set of colors proudly again, for not only did they pick me, but I picked them.
"Hey, doesn't this feel like something huge is ending?" Kagami shouts in my ear as he and Imayoshi swim through the crowd to walk beside us.
"Ending?" I ask, annoyed that he and I agree. Just to be contrary I take up a different position. "Four years and we'll be at it again. You should play for the United States next time."
"Or you could play for Japan," he counters. It's always a game with him, whether there is a ball between us or not.
After a few moments, Murasakibara lumbers into line with us, shoving chips into his mouth one after another.
"That's the beauty of the Kiseki no Sedai," Akashi says just loud enough for me to hear. "We can grow and become more than ourselves, but at the same time, we never change who we are inside."
I nod, unable to give voice to the thoughts swirling in my head. I wish Kazu was here with me, he'd know how to translate all that is going on inside me. Akashi doesn't mind my silence though and keeps pace with me, even when Aomine runs by, goading Kagami to chase him down the hundred meter markings on the track.
As we walk, I trace Kazu's name on my outer thigh over and over again in English letters. It's a newer OCD tick I've picked up, born out of the necessity to practice my letters and continued because the repetition is soothing. I'm not sure if anyone has noticed this new pattern of behavior yet, but I hope no one will.
The announcer introduces Kise, as he and his band take the stage, and I can't help smiling, knowing that we are all here together.
"Four years is a long time. Do you think we'll all make it back to the next Olympiad?" I ask.
"My Emperor's eye doesn't work like that, my friend. Who knows where we'll be next week? The team physician says I'll need surgery on my ankle. I'll miss the rest of the season."
"Seijūrō…"
"It's not the end of the world, Shintarō. As a US citizen, I have options, but Tiga was right, in his awkward, juvenile way. This is an ending, but neither of us knows for how long."
I pant as we walk, thinking about all the injuries and tragedies that have filled our five small lives. First, Kise's knee, then Murasakibara's elbow, now Seijūrō's back then ankle. It's only a matter of time before something gives for Aomine, for me. At least Tetsuya is safe. I take solace in that, but it doesn't stop the swelling panic trying to choke me into submission. I look up, spinning in circles trying desperately to find Kazu in the crowd of a million people. I stumble, pitching backward.
"Whoa, there, Midorima-kun," Imayoshi says, pushing me back to an upright position. "Your boy told me ta watch out for ya tonight; said you might have a bit of a panic spell and I guess he was right. I never woulda believed him if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes. I ain't him, but I'm here for ya tonight in his stead."
"He knows me too well," I grumble as other athletes from a multitude of nations filter by, unknowing or uncaring about our conversation.
"He loves ya so much, it only stands ta figure he'd know ya this well. Don't be mad at him. I wasn't supposed ta tell ya he had me watchin' out for ya."
"As long as you say nothing, I won't either."
"Deal, Midorima, deal. Are you gonna be okay now?"
"I feel like I haven't taken my medicines," I admit, knowing that he's asking not as a friend, but as a mental health professional.
"And did ya?" he asks, opening his eyes a sliver to peer into mine.
"You have eyes," I blurt out and his lids snap shut, cutting off whatever stupidity I was about to say. "Yes, Kazu handed them to me and he watched me swallow them so I would specifically remember I took them if I panicked tonight."
"That his idea or yours?" he asks, a grin spreading across his face. I shiver.
"His."
"He's one smart cookie," he says, cackling and he turns away from me. "In my professional opinion, there is nothin' wrong with ya that wasn't wrong before ya came in here. You'll survive the night."
As we come around the bend, Aomine and Kagami are waiting for us, rough-housing gently as Kiyoshi Teppei, Hyūga Riko, and Mibuchi Reo stand beside them, amused smiles changing to wider ones as they spot us.
"Where's the rest of your team, Gold Medalists?" Hyūga-chan teases.
"I don't know," I answer truthfully answer her. "I don't really care about them."
"I don't care at all," Seijūrō says flatly. "We are all together and that's all that matters."
"Well, said, Sei-chan," Mibuchi concludes, nodding his head. "But let's not keep the lady waiting. We're all here now and we can take our seats." He gestures toward the stand and the line of athletes climbing the stairs. I look at Seijūrō's ankle and back up at the two sets of stairs.
"Don't doubt I can do it, Shintarō," he tells me.
"But you shouldn't," Kiyoshi qualifies. "Don't do more damage to your injury; trust me, I speak from experience." We stand aside and wait for more of the crowd to fill in the seats ahead of us.
"After the ceremonies close," Seijūrō says, "I've arranged for late-night service at the Legends Sports Bar."
"Won't they be crowded tonight?" Kagami asks.
Seijūrō smiles, his eyes wide for effect – I hope. "This will be a… private function. We have the space to ourselves. It is one of the few perks of being me."
"Sei-chan, I'll have to pass." Mibuchi posture slumps uncomfortably as he looks at his hands instead of Seijūrō.
"Why? Will Hiroshi be –"
"No, he'd love it." Mibuchi sighs and looks to Kiyoshi for help.
"The Uncrowned Kings are going to meet up tonight to pay our final respects to Hanamiya," The Iron Heart tells us.
"Shit," Imayoshi says. "That bastard ruined everythin' when he was alive and I bet he's gettin' a kick outta knowin' he's doin' it from beyond the grave too."
"Legends will wait for us to arrive. We will all go and say our goodbyes and then toast him and us at the bar," Seijūrō proclaims and no one argues.
After the ceremony is complete, my parents take Akira – who had fallen asleep after the first hour – home.
Hayama and Nebuya met us at the gate to the cemetery. Hayama has the wooden tub and ladle and Nebuya has a fistful of incense. Our procession moves quietly down the paths to the Hanamiya family plot. As the surviving Uncrowned Kings move forward to the marble marker, the rest of us stay behind, except for Imayoshi. He stands behind them, slouched with his hands in his pockets, his eyes shut but somehow looking directly at the smug portrait leaning against the grave.
Despite the fact that the site is too new to need cleaning, Kiyoshi half-heartedly scrubs away pretend grim. Hayama pats the ground looking for weeds, but he finds none. Finally, they back away and Nebuya separates the incense into two smaller bundles and drops them into the holders before the portrait. Mibuchi ladles water over the grave. We all clasps our hands and bow our heads. I say nothing to the deceased. I didn't like him in life and taking his life to spite those he left behind did not change that fact.
"I wish there was something I could have done to change his mind," Kiyoshi finally says as his hands fall to his side.
"There was nothin' anyone could have done," Imayoshi says, his demeanor changing. "He was broken inside, always had been, and there was nothin' any of us coulda done ta change that fact."
"He tried to change," Kiyoshi insists. "He stopped hurting others –"
"No, he just changed tactics. If he couldn't hurt ya directly, he'd hurt ya by hurtin' himself. He was obsessed with you, Kiyoshi, and all he wanted was ta break the Iron Heart's heart. Trust me, I knew him longer than any of the others of ya."
"Did he...," Mibuchi began, then swallowed hard before continuing. "Were you his psychologist?"
"No, but I referred him ta another good one. I was too close ta the situation ta help. He'd hurt me too many times for me ta forgive him. Are we done here or do we have ta keep starin' at that self-satisfied face? Every time I look at him, I heard him sayin' 'Baka, I finally got ya'll.' I'm hungry and I want ta go." Imayoshi turned away from the grave and began down the path, Mitobe stepping away from us to join him.
I shrugged at Kazu and followed them, since this man meant so little to me, yet those two mean much to Kazu.
Akashi POV
"Is this what it is like to have friends?" Akashi shouts into Furihata's ear over the caterwauling of Aomine and Kagami poorly singing "Eye of the Tiger" on the karaoke machine in the front of the room.
Furihata beams, drunk in public for the first time in many years, and puts his arm around Akashi's shoulders to pull him to his side. "Yes, isn't it wonderful?" he asks, his speech slurred.
That's not quite how I'd phrase it, Kōki, but at least it is amusing. Furihata doesn't notice Akashi's lack of answer because his eyes are already tracking some other antic across the room coming from Kise and Kasamatsu. As his eyes go from group to group to group, he notes the Point Guard Poker Players near their respective Kiseki no Sedai. How did I not notice this before? They are everywhere and somehow I had my own all this time and neither of us knew. That thought did make him smile.
Furihata gave him a sudden squeeze, then his arm fell away and he stumbled off to watch Kuroko do magic tricks his students had taught him.
The only other stone sober people in the bar were Midorima and Kazu, and Akashi took a place beside the two as they watched the drunken behavior like the parents they were.
"Kōki says this is what it is like to have friends," he reports, a hint of a smile cracking through the stoic mask he attempted to wear.
"It sucks being the responsible ones," Kazu confirmed. "But a real friend makes sure that everyone gets home safely."
Midorima lifted his cell phone from where it was barely concealed below the table's edge. "I've been trying to arrange rides home, but it seems the whole city is inebriated tonight."
"Don't worry, I have a limousine on call for tonight. They'll take us all home once the spell is broken," Akashi said.
"And what spell is that, Seijūrō?"
Or maybe I should have said when the illusion is broken, Akashi thought. No, he shook that thought away and looked at Midorima's open, curious eyes. When did you get so mature? he wondered. When did I start looking at you as a role model?
"Once we all leave here tonight, we will go our own ways — scattered across the globe — and I have the unenviable task of rebuilding my life."
"Unenviable?" Midorima asks. "It seems like getting to decide who you are for the first time would be liberating."
"I'm terrified."
"Terrified?" Kazu asked, leaning in. "Of what?"
"Of being in control of my life for once. It's all I've ever wanted, my entire life, and now it's suddenly here and I feel very out of control."
Mitobe appeared before the open seat and pointed to it, asking permission to sit.
"Of course," Kazu responded, pushing the chair toward him with his foot. "We were just discussing how horrible it is to 'adult'."
Mitobe slid into his chair and put his half-full bottle of Kirin Draft on the table. He took up his phone and sent a quick text. [Adulting sucks.]
"It's not 'adulting'," Akashi insisted, "I was never allowed to be a child. It's actually being the only one accountable for my actions now, as strange as that may seem. I've been able to pass off the worst things I've done as the fault of my father for so long that I'm not sure how to take responsibility anymore."
"You're right, Seijūrō," Midorima added. "It's more than your emotional and physical age. Being an adult means owning up to your mistakes and making decisions that benefit those around you, not just yourself. I don't think I truly understood that until I became a father."
Next to him, Mitobe began typing out a response but backspaced as he rethought his words.
"I had to grow up fast as the child of an alcoholic," Kazu added, "but I didn't understand what it meant until I had good role models — Shin-chan's parents — to teach me there was more to becoming an adult than just age."
A gentle buzz hit the three phones almost simultaneously. The text from Mitobe read [Same here. I was a parent to my siblings, more so than my own parents.]
Kazu snorted. "And then you moved out on your own and became Imayoshi's keeper. You're a glutton for punishment, Mitobe."
Mitobe tried to hide the rising blush on his face by taking a sip of his beer but sputtered as his face twisted into a grimace.
"Is that the same beer you've been sipping off all night?" Kazu asked, taking the bottle from Mitobe and smelling it. "It's warm; yuck."
Mitobe nodded his head as he wiped the brew from his lips.
"It's an open bar, Rinnosuke, help yourself to whatever you want," Akashi offered.
[It's hard enough to get Sho home when he's drunk, but when both of us are, it is impossible.]
"I'll make sure you get home," Akashi said. "This is a celebration."
Mitobe reached over and took up Akashi's drink, smelling it. Really?
"I've never gotten drunk in my life," Akashi said. "I'm not sure how I would react, so I'm sticking to water tonight. Maybe once I get home…"
[We'll take you up on the offer of help to get home, but I'll stay sober because it is just the way I am.]
"So," Akashi began, clearing his throat. "You are saying I won't understand until I'm a parent?"
"I think what we're trying to say," Midorima began, "is that you can't understand until you experience it; after all, that's what we all had to do. It's frightening now because it is so unknown to you, but now that you are free to build your life with Furihata, you'll learn. You didn't understand losing until Kuroko taught you how. It will be the same thing in your life. Just like on the court, you have to shot before you can know if you can do it. But this time you aren't alone. Depend on Furihata —"
"And allow him to depend on you," Kazu interrupted.
"And everything will work out," Midorima finished.
[He's got a big heart and a good head on his shoulders.] Mitobe added.
The four men fell silent for a moment and in the break, they heard Kise's giggles cut through the room. "I guess now is as good as any to make a few remarks," Akashi said as he pushed away from the table and signaled for the waiter. "Bring out the champagne. We should have our last toast before everyone passes out."
The bubbly spread throughout the room while Akashi pulled a single bottle of sparkling grape juice from behind the bar. He split it evenly between four glass for himself and the three men at the table. After delivering it personally, he went up to the front and took the microphone away from the stand. He thumped the screen. Is this thing on?
Aomine spared a second glance over his shoulder from his place at the video game arcade game he and Kagami were competing on. "Shit, he's going to give a speech."
"Two more zombies to go," Kagami grunted and the two turned away to finish the round.
"Good evening, everyone —"
"It's three o'clock in the morning," Murasakibara complained. "I'm hungry. Akashi-chin."
You were born hungry, you'll die hungry. "Breakfast is your own problem," Akashi said, laughing. "I'm going to take a moment of privilege, so please take a seat."
Imayoshi looked around the room and saw Mitobe at the far table. He quietly excused himself and went over to the quiet man, draping his arm across those large shoulders. Kuroko appeared in a seat next to Sasuke and Aomine and Kagami left the game for the same table. After a moment, everyone had taken seats, leaving Akashi alone on the dais, microphone held loose in his hands. The room fell quiet enough to hear Murasakibara open the bag of chips Himuro handed him under the table.
Akashi surveyed the room. My true family… and cleared his throat. He smiled, perhaps the first real smile to ever grace his lips. "Thank you. That's really all I wanted to do with tonight, this party, this one last gathering before we spread to the four winds again. I'd call you each by name, but that would take too long and Atsushi would faint from hunger."
He paused as laughter filled the room. "And I can't let you all sober up, then I'd have to worry about your remembering how sappy I sound."
There was a hoot from the back. He wasn't sure who it came from until Reo followed it up with a peel of laughter.
"So, I'll just do this in small groups. My first and foremost thanks go out to the Kiseki no Sedai. Without you and your inspiration, I wouldn't have made it this far. Tetsuya taught us each what it meant to lose and why it was worth it." Akashi raised his glass and took a small sip.
He turned and held eye contact with each member of the Uncrowned Kings present in the room and along the way, did the same with Mitobe, Kasamatsu, and Kazu. "To the Uncrowned Kings and the Point Guard Poker Players, thank you for your support of all of us Kiseki no Sedai. Thank you for holding us up when we couldn't stand, for being there we were at our worst, for believing in us when we couldn't believe in ourselves." He took another sip. "I extend those thanks to everyone who became our friends during those dark days and now continued to stand with us when we came out of the shadows." Akashi took another sip and bowed.
"And finally to Kōki,who lived with all my lies for some many years…" his voice broke as tears began to trail down his pale cheeks. He rubbed at them with the sleeve of his jacket, unbelieving. What the fuck is wrong with me? He held out his empty hand to Furihata, who came quickly to his side. "I love you," he said into the microphone, then let it drop with a squelch of noise as he pulled Furihata into an embrace, burying his face in his lover's neck.
"I love you too, Jiro and I always will."
A chorus of 'awww' started in the back.
"So cute!" Sasuke squeaked.
And then the chant began with Reo, "Kiss him!" And continued around the room to the claps and stomps of the whole party.
Akashi pulled back, one eyebrow raised, enough to look Furihata in the eyes. "We can't disappoint them."
"Of course not," Furihata agreed, taking Akashi's wet cheeks between his palms. He tilted his head just a little and kissed Akashi in front of everyone while a dozen cell phone cameras caught the whole thing.
A/N: Thanks for coming along on this wild journey with me. I'm working on the last few chapters of Gentlemen, Place Your Bets and a new story following the Midorima family. If you enjoyed this, please favorite or review. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!