I updated pretty fast this time! Be aware, this drabble is canon pairing, but still Zutara.

MagicalBender: Katara is indeed badass, which is basically the reason I love writing her!

NollasBlack: I'm doing good! And you? :)

Katara knew being a mother wasn't going to be easy. She knew that it would be incredibly challenging and difficult. But she also knew that she would fall instantly in love with that child from the moment it breathed its first breath, that she would feel nothing but a mother's fierce passion for that child.

What she was not expecting was this feeling of regret. Not regret for having the child, never, but for when she had decided to have it, and as guilty as she felt admitting it, who she decided to have it with.

She loved Aang, she really, truly did. He had become her best friend, her companion, her husband. But they were so young, and this was so new. He had wanted a child so bad, and he was so eager to get married, but Katara was beginning to feel less like a woman, and more like a baby-making machine.

She felt terrible to even think something like that. Aang was the last airbender, of course he would want to have children as soon as possible! She didn't blame him for wanting a child, she just regretted agreeing to be that child's mother.

Neither one had been prepared for the life of a parent.

Katara hated herself. She hated how she irrationally blamed Aang for her own feelings. She hated her selfishness and self-pity. She hated her inability to be a good mother. She didn't know how to do this. She was only nineteen for heaven's sake! She was supposed to be having adventures, enjoying her youth, her prime time. Not worrying over a baby, changing diapers, and staying home while her husband had fun. This wasn't fair, and Katara hated herself everyday for feeling so helpless.

No matter how much Aang coddled the baby and spoiled it with attention, he was never the one stuck with the responsibilty of being a mother. He was still the same free spirit that he had been those few years ago. He wasn't ready to be a father, and Katara didn't think he even knew the seriousness of his duty.

So here Katara was, sitting in the empty courtyard of the Fire Palace, clutching a newborn Kya to her chest and listening to the faint echoes of her husband and her friends laughing around the dinner table. Her heart constricted, and she gently hushed the cooing baby in her arms. A pang of regret and jealousy swept through her. She should be in there with them, having fun and being careless. Five years ago, she had not imagined this to be her fate.

Kya reached up for Katara's hair. She fisted it in her chubby hand, and giggling, yanked on it. Katara bit her lip. "Hush, Kya. Stop that. Please stop." Her voice cracked.

And suddenly, it was as if a wall broke down. Katara shut her eyes as the tears fell, faster and faster. She choked on a sob. The baby, very sensitive to her mother's emotions, immediately ceased her giggling. Kya whimpered and let out a high pitched squeal. Katara panicked, trying hard to hold back a hiccup, and shushed the baby. But it was too late, and she began wailing, fat crocodile tears leaking down her infant face.

"No, please, don't cry." Katara whispered uselessly. Everything came crashing down on her at once. Her exhaustion, stress, frustration, regret. She hunched over and joined her daughter in her crying, desperately whispering idle comforts. "Stop, no more crying. Stop."

"Katara? What's wrong?" And then Zuko was there, pulling Kya from her arms and laying a hand on her shoulder. "Katara, why are you crying?"

She blinked through teary eyes, and her tiredness made it impossible for her to feel any humiliation or embarrassment at him finding her in this state. She bit her lip and took a shaky breath until she was sure her voice would not falter. "I'm just tired. And she won't stop crying."

He studied her for a few moments, rocking the baby in his arms until the crying settled down. Finally, his piercing gaze softened, and he took a seat beside her. One arm pulled her in gently until she was leaning against him, crying into his shoulder, and the other was cradling the baby.

Katara cried and cried, letting out all the anger and hurt until she was too exhausted to cry anymore. She was glad Zuko hadn't asked her the real reason she was upset, but she suspected he already knew. She was grateful because he understood her self-loathing. What was the point of making her say out loud the selfish things in her head and add to her growing list of regret? He would never allow her to do anything to potentially damage herself further.

Eventually she gave into her exhaustion, and she fell asleep against the twenty year old Fire Lord. Her friends, her husband, never came out to check on her, but he did. Later, in the morning, when she would wake to find herself back in her room with Kya safe in her crib, Katara would, not for the first time, imagine an alternate life. A life where she was happy and content. Where there was comfort in place of regret. Where instead of a baby named Kya with pale skin, light brown hair, and grey eyes, there would be a baby named Kya with ebony hair, tan skin, and bright gold eyes.

Author's Note: Although it's overall Kataang marriage in this drabble, you can see Katara is not happy with it. I wanted to do more of a realistic approach to the series. I do think that Katara loved Aang, but I think she loved Zuko as well. Katara's love for Aang is more out of obligation and familiarity, while her love for Zuko is stemmed from understanding and passion. Zuko seems to just get her in a way Aang never will. He understood how she hated herself for her thoughts, and he was able to recognize when she just needed someone to be there instead of someone to preach and reprimand, which Aang would undoubtedly resort to.

Hopefully you guys were satisfied with this drabble, especially since it was more on the serious side this time. Plus it was kind of sad. Oh well.

Please review! I hate when author's beg for reviews, but I'm really needing the motivation to keep writing right now. Mostly because of my busy schedule, but your guys' reviews really help!

Love you guys,

MI3

Quote of the Day: "One's real life is often the life that one does not lead." ~ Oscar Wilde