A/N - I was going to update this on Wednesday, but I didn't have enough time. Sorry. Anyways, credit, once again, to a random demigod for this idea.
One of Hephaestus's Automatons Backfires: Last Sunday, an automaton bird made by Hephaestus backfired, and was loose on Olympus for six hours, causing much damage, before the apologetic god of blacksmiths got it back under control.
Hephaestus: Someone tampered with it!
Hermes: Um, really? Uh...no way! Really?
Hephaestus: I am the god of blacksmiths! You think that something I made could do that?
Hermes: But...someone did something. They were a genius! Somehow...uh, they somehow managed...
Hephaestus: The person who did this was not a genius. More like a self-absorbed prankster.
Hermes: Not a genius? Self-absorbed? Insulting! How dare you - um...I mean, yeah, it was very...non-genius of them, and...
Hephaestus: Wait...
Hermes: *Squeaks* Is it possible to leave now?
Hephaestus: This is suspicious...
Artemis: Hermes, you just blew your cover. And you went too far this time. And I can't believe that Hephaestus -
Athena: No, Artemis, wait and let Hephaestus draw the lines for himself.
Hephaestus: I'm drawing the lines. Hermes...you're the god of pranksters, right?
Hermes: No, really, Hephaestus, that's not a nice way to put it...
Hephaestus: But you are, right?
Hermes: Well...Hephaestus, please...I'm the god of...travelers, merchants, you know!
Hephaestus: And pranksters.
Hermes: Not officially.
Hephaestus: Not officially, but it's become, like, part of your job prescription, right?
Hermes: Um...
Hephaestus: Fine! Hermes, you're a prankster, right?
Hermes: Well...yeah...
Hephaestus: Okay. And why are you so anxious when answering my questions?
Hermes: Uh...am I?
Hephaestus: Yeah, you are. And why did you insist on calling this...person a genius? Why were you offended when I said...they were self-absorbed?
Hermes: Uh...offended? *Squeaks*
Hephaestus: Hermes, it was you, wasn't it.
Hermes: No! No, Hephaestus! No, please! It wasn't me!
Hephaestus: Uh huh.
Hermes: I didn't mean to do any harm, I swear!
Hephaestus: Oh, good, a confession. Well, Hermes...
Hermes: I'll help you in your workshop! I'll build another automaton!
Hephaestus: I'm sure you'll succeed...not.
Hermes: Don't underestimate the power of, um...pranksters.
Hephaestus: Sure. Anyways, Hermes, I believe I have the right to assign you to three decades of helping in my workshop...as a slave. Onlookers, I have the right to do this, right?
Athena: Most certainly.
Artemis: Yeah, you do.
Ares: Do it! Bring it up to three millennia!
Hermes: Please, guys, no!
Apollo: Guys, really...I mean, he has the right to, after what Hermes did to his reputation, but still...
Hermes: People only thought he wasn't the best blacksmith ever! Um...I mean, they only realized he had flaws...oh, great...but fewer than everyone else, of course!
Hephaestus: Nice try. Thirty years as my slave, Hermes!
Hermes: No! Please!
Hephaestus: If you're obedient, maybe I'll cut your term short.
Athena: Good strategy, Hephaestus.
Hephaestus: Yeah. Emphasis on the maybe.
Hermes: I'll do anything! But please, not thirty years!
Hephaestus: I told you: if you're obedient, I might cut it short.
Hermes: Can I still take my Spanish lessons? I'm looking for a place! Por favor, me wanna learño españish! (Auto-translate: This phrase cannot be translated into English. We're sorry for any inconveniences this may cause.)
Athena: Wow.
Hephaestus: You'd better improve if I let you do this.
Hermes: Me wanna improvio! Me will improvio if you allowa me to takear los lessonios of españish. (Auto-translate: -)
Athena: Please, just speak in English. Or Greek!
Hermes: That's not fun.
Athena: At least they're languages!
Hermes: Spanish is a language.
Athena: Yeah, but that wasn't Spanish.
Hermes: Which is why I must take Spanish classes.
Demeter: HEPHAESTUS! Your automaton completely ruined my fields! It murdered so many flowers and innocent other plants! How dare you interfere with my fields! You set me back so many days, -
Athena: Calm down, Demeter. Hermes messed with Hephaestus's automatons. He's responsible. Hephaestus thanked him by assigning him thirty years of slave work.
Demeter: HERMES!
Artemis: Hermes...was that the only automaton you broke?
Hermes: Um...yeah! Of course! I'd never break any automatons...I mean, I'd never break more than one, because, one's like...one's, like, the most I could break...and, um, it's not nice to break more than one...
Hephaestus: Hermes, how many did you tamper with?
Hermes: Just the one!
Hephaestus: Hermes. How many?
Hermes: Well, three...fine, eight...if you count those other ones that I hid around Olympus, eighty-four...
Hephaestus: Eighty-four?
Athena: Oh, great. They'll be wrecking things soon...
Hephaestus: Need to shut this down! Must...track...down...missing...automatons...
A/N - And there you have it.