A/N - Hey guys! So, I got this idea a while ago and loved it. I never got a chance to write it until now, though.
Apollo Changes His Name: Unsatisfied with the name he has been burdened with his entire life, Apollo has changed his name to Pollo.
Artemis: *cracks up*
Apollo: Holy Zeus, I officially have the best name on Olympus!
Zeus: What are you talking about? My name's most certainly the best. I mean, it rumbles. I mean, the sky rumbles. When you say it.
Apollo: Sorry, Zeus, but my new name's just so epic that I just have to make a haiku about it.
Artemis: Please don't.
Apollo: Sorry, Arty! I'm gonna start crafting it now.
Artemis: Oh, great, Pollo.
Apollo: Ooh, it's catchy, isn't it?
Artemis: *cracks up again*
Apollo: My name is Pollo
It's the best name ever, right?
It's so catchy!
Artemis: You seem to have an issue with your last lines...
Apollo: What?
Artemis: Can you count to five, brother?
Apollo: Of course, why? Oh...how about, 'It's so so catchy?' That's five. Right?
Artemis: Yes, chicken, that's five.
Apollo: No, chicken is two.
Artemis: Never mind.
Apollo: Come on, guys, wasn't my haiku awesome?
Hermes: No.
Athena: I agree with Hermes.
Apollo: Oh, come on, guys! #haikulove
Athena: Don't bring any of those repulsive hashtags into this. They are tools for the weak-minded, and they obstruct one's English.
Apollo: Fine. #χαϊκού αγάπη
Artemis: No. Just don't.
Apollo: Boom! Ain't nobody ever thought of hashtagging in Greek!
Artemis: I'm sure it's been done before.
Athena: Apollo, hashtags corrupt any language they are used with.
Apollo: Hashtags are awesome...
Athena: And 'ain't' isn't a word.
Apollo: Sure it is.
Athena: No, it's a contraction gone wrong.
Apollo: But...
Hermes: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.
Apollo: Something funny?
Hermes: Yeah. Hahaha.
Apollo: Oh?
Hermes: Yeahhhhhhhhahahahaha.
Artemis: He's such an airhead.
Apollo: Yeah, sis. I'm not sure what he's doing.
Artemis: I wasn't talking about Hermes, chicken.
Hermes: And I agree wholeheartedly.
Apollo: Someone let me in on the joke.
Artemis: It's nothing you didn't directly bring on yourself, chicken.
Apollo: Why do you keep calling me that?
Hermes: 'Cause it's your relative or something.
Apollo: Excuse me, all I've done is shorten my name to Pollo. Sounds much cooler, right?
Hermes: Yeah, maybe, but I've been taking Spanish classes.
Apollo: -.-
Artemis: Chicken.
Apollo: I'm a god, actually. And I'm not that scared of things.
Artemis: *facepalm*
Athena: Apollo, didn't you know that 'Pollo' means 'chicken' in Spanish?
Apollo: *gapes* What?
Artemis: Yeah.
Apollo: But it can't! It's my name.
Artemis: What, so it therefore can't mean 'chicken'?
Apollo: Of course it can't. Don't be ridiculous.
Artemis: Do you happen to have a Spanish dictionary on you?
Apollo: Nooooooope.
Hermes: I'm a Spanish dictoniary!
Athena: Hopefully your spelling is better in Spanish.
Hermes: Oh, I assure you, it is!
Artemis: Let's see it, then. What does 'pollo' mean in Spanish, hmm?
Hermes: Turkey!
Artemis: *facepalm*
Athena: Incorrect. 'Pollo' translates into 'chicken'.
Hermes: No, no, it means turkey. I've been taking Spanish classes.
Apollo: Guys, it obviously doesn't mean either of those. It means 'totally awesome sun god'.
Artemis: Hermes, check your Spanish dictionary again.
Hermes: I lost it. But trust me, it means 'turkey'.
Apollo: I'd rather be a turkey.
Artemis: Well, at least I don't have to go turkey hunting at Thanksgiving. You've made my job easier.
Apollo: What?
Artemis: Never mind.
Apollo: Oh. Thanksgiving. I'd rather be a god.
Hermes: Then don't call yourself a turkey!
Artemis: Chicken.
Apollo: But Pollo's the coolest name ever!
Hermes: And I'm gonna keep calling you a turkey.
Artemis: Chicken.
Hermes: Hail Lord Apollo, God of all Turkeys!
Artemis: Chickens!
Apollo: *groans* I'm officially changing my name back.
Artemis: No, keep it. Maybe we can have a chicken this year.
Apollo: Arty, I never thought you'd turn into a cannibal.
Artemis: It wouldn't be cannibalism. I'm not a chicken.
Hermes: Turkey, you mean.
Apollo: Neither am I! I'm a god! I'm Apollo!
Artemis: *sighs* Too bad.
Hermes: I'm going to go find my Spanish dictionary now. Bet you a drachma 'pollo' means 'turkey'.
Artemis: Fifty drachmas.
Hermes: Even better. Now, excuse me, I have to run.
A/N - Hey, if you have the time, please remember to drop a review. Have a good day!