As I sit at my desk lost in thought I am still no clearer as to whether Christian actually likes me or not. He is good at hiding his feelings, yes he likes me working for him but what does he actually feel for me as a person. Why am I feeling totally insecure at the moment? Is it because of Christian's angry words earlier, Mia's taunts last night or the thought of not seeing Hannah for two days? I throw myself into my work and lose all sense of thought, at least then I can forget.

After a couple of hours exhaustion hits. I go to Christian's floor to let Andrea know that I am leaving for the day and then I make my way to Escala; it is closer to the office and also means I can sleep for longer.

It doesn't look like Taylor or Mrs Jones are around so I go straight to the fridge, it is always so well stocked. I find what I am looking for and as I am about to take it out of the fridge I hear Mrs Jones.

'Anything but the lasagne, that's dinner for you and your brothers later.'

'But Mrs Jones, you know I can't resist it and they don't appreciate it as much as I do. I will do anything for your lasagne it's the best in the world'

'Don't try and flatter me it won't work. Sub or omelette for lunch?'

'Sub please. Though I will make it if you're busy, you weren't expecting me.'

'I'll make it. I've missed looking after you and I don't make as much mess.'

'You wound me Mrs Jones. Where's Taylor?'

'He was supposed to go with Mr Grey but Sophie was taken ill so he is with her. What are you planning to do this afternoon?'

'Sleep. Christian wouldn't let me go to Portland. He said I looked too exhausted so I had better do what he says. At least when I wake I'll be ready for beers, pool and your lovely lasagne.'

'Oh you are so charming. Your room is ready for you as Mr Grey said you might be staying the night. Here's your sub, enjoy.'

'Thanks Mrs J, you are a star.'

'Do you ever stop?'

'Not where you're concerned.'

'It's a good job Taylor isn't here.' She says as she leaves to get on with her chores.

I sit at the breakfast bar eating my lunch. Once I'm finished I go to Christian's study and check out a few things on his computer. An idea comes to mind. I call Christian but his voicemail kicks in so I leave a message 'Hi Christian, I'm at Escala, Mrs Jones made me lunch and I'm about to go to sleep so that I'm ready to thrash you at pool. See you soon.' I say then click off. Wow I've managed to trace him just like Barney showed me. He must be in a car travelling as he's heading away from WSU. Maybe he's on his way back to Charlie Tango which means he'll be back in a couple of hours. Feeling happy I go to what I consider to be my room and as soon as my head hits the pillow I'm asleep.

When I wake it's just before 6pm, I feel so much better after a good sleep. I check my phone, there's a voicemail from Christian. 'Hey little bro, I was driving so missed your call. I'll be home in about an hour, we're just leaving and I plan to land on Escala. By the way I didn't tell you earlier but I love you, don't ever doubt it.' Oh, he does love me. I grin to myself. I jump out of bed and pull on some jeans and a t-shirt. He must be back now and he will have left me to sleep.

I wander into the great room; it is empty so I go to Christian's study. He's not there either. On my way out I bump into Taylor.

'Hi Taylor, how's Sophie?'

'She's getting better thank you.'

'Have you seen Christian?'

'No, Mr Grey is not back from Portland yet.'

'Are you sure? He left me a voicemail; he should have been back at least two hours ago.'

Taylor goes straight to his office and I follow him, he makes a few phone calls. I hear him mention Barney, Welch, Andrea and then a few names I don't recognise. He then turns and gestures for me to sit down.

'Matthew, what time did Mr Grey leave the voicemail?'

'About three I think, I'd been in his study and called him because I wanted to trace him. He had left WSU and was driving north, I presume back to Charlie Tango. He called me back but I was asleep.'

'You know how to do that?'

'Yes, Barney showed me how to.' I say.

Taylor's phone rings and he answers it, it's Barney again, he can't get any trace from Christian's phone meaning it must be out of charge or there's no coverage where he is. Taylor tells him the information that I just gave him and then clicks off. The phone rings again immediately, it's someone from the airport authority; a search is underway for the helicopter as it has failed to turn up or make radio contact. I sit in the chair opposite Taylor and put my head in my hands.

'Matthew, would it be easier for you if you waited in the living room.'

'No, I want to know. I should have been with him.'

'So should I. I'm going to call your father.' He says and I just nod at him. The call is brief, dad is going to bring mom and Mia here and he'll call Elliot. Taylor stands and goes to leave the room. 'I'll be a few minutes; I'm just going to tell Mrs Jones. Can you answer the phone if it rings?'

'Sure.' I say almost in a daze. I sit staring into space, not really knowing what to think. I can't believe that Christian is missing. Taylor returns, he makes some more phone calls. Still I sit there, not really listening but not thinking either.

'Matthew, have you called Hannah?' Taylor asks. I shake my head. 'You need to call her, it will be on all the news feeds soon and it is best that she hears from you.'

'Ok, I'll call her now otherwise she will be worried. She doesn't know that Christian refused to let me go, she'll think that I am with him.'

'I'll try and get them to hold the press release for another ten minutes to give you time to call.'

'Thanks Taylor.' I say as I go back to my room for my phone. I sit on the edge of the bed and press Hannah's name for the speed dial.

'Hi Matt.' She answers straight away.

'Hi baby'

'Matt are you OK?'

'Yes I'm fine. I'm at Christian's but I needed to call to tell you I'm OK. I didn't go to Portland with him today. His helicopter has gone missing and it will be all over every news channel very soon. I didn't want you to worry about me.'

'Thank you for telling me. I would have been frantic. Matt you must be hurting.'

'I don't know what I'm feeling. Mom and dad will be here soon.'

'Do you want me to come to you?'

'No stay with your dad for now. I'll call you if there's any news. I love you baby.'

'I love you too. Please call me if you need me.' She says and I click off.

I wander back into the great room and towards the kitchen. Mrs Jones turns to look at me and then pulls me into her arms and envelopes me in a hug. My parents must have arrived because the next thing I know is Mrs Jones has let go and mom has taken over. She kisses my forehead over and over again.

'Darling boy are you OK?' she asks.

'I should be with him mom. He was angry with me.' I whisper.

'Hey, shhh. Let's not worry about that now. Dad is in Christian's study with Taylor trying to find out more information. Elliot should be here any minute. Let's go and sit with Mia.' She says as she guides me to the white sofas. Mia looks dreadful; she must have spent the whole car journey from Bellevue crying. I give her a quick hug but that sets her off crying again. I look at mom helplessly and she takes over.

I move towards Christian's study. Dad is stood staring out of the window, whilst Taylor is on the phone and looking at something on the computer. I go and stand next to dad and he puts an arm round my shoulder and pulls me close.

'Dad I'm worried and scared.'

'Don't be. Christian will find a way back. It's just a waiting game now. At least you weren't with him. Your mom is worried enough with Christian missing, if there had been two of you out there I dread to think what she would have been like.' He says and kisses the top of my head.

Taylor interrupts us 'Elliot has arrived.' He says but there's really no need as I hear him before I see him. He's in the living room saying 'Hello' to mom and Mia. Then he's in the study, he nods at Taylor. Hugs dad and then hugs me.

'Hey little bro. Great to see you after so long.'

'You too, I see you did have time to get a tan.'

'Cheeky.' He says and then turns to Dad and Taylor to tell them he has called Ana and she is on her way back here.

As Elliot and I move out of the study Ana is just arriving. She looks so pale and in shock. She is with Kate and two other men. Elliot goes to hug Kate. I go to Ana; I pull her into my arms, kissing her head. She leans into me and I don't let go until I feel her relax slightly. I guide her to the sofas, sitting her down opposite mom and Mia. She feels cold so I switch the fire on and then go to grab a blanket from my room.

As I drape the blanket round her shoulders she smiles shyly at me and whispers a 'thank you'

'Did you eat?' I ask her and she looks at me in surprise. I bet Christian asks her that all the time. I cock my head to one side as if waiting for an answer.

'No.' she says and then adds 'You're so like him.' I smirk at her and then go to the fridge. Mrs Jones is in the kitchen still.

'Are you hungry Matthew?' she asks.

'No, but Ana hasn't eaten. Christian will be mad with her, what can I give her?'

'She won't eat much, just a small bowl with a few grapes and strawberries. As long as she has something.'

'Thanks Mrs J.' I say, grabbing a few of each and putting them in a bowl which I then take to Ana. Sitting back down next to her I hand her the bowl. 'You need to eat these, I've not given you a lot but when Christian gets back if you haven't eaten he will be mad.' I say to her quietly.

'How do you know?'

'Trust me; I'm an expert in making Christian mad. It usually happens at least once a day. In fact he was even mad with me this morning, that's why I'm looking after you now instead of being lost with him.' I tuck a piece of her hair behind her ear. 'Please eat; I'll play the piano for you whilst you do. I don't want him to be mad.'

I go to the piano and start to play. I look at Ana, she nods at me as she recognises the tune and then she eats. When I finish this tune I look at Ana shyly, she smiles at me. I start another, again she nods in recognition. The pattern continues, though at tune six she shakes her head. He hasn't played this one, which means she has only heard him play when he's been angry or upset with something. I put my head to one side in a question and she smiles so I continue with it. When I finish this one I close the lid and get up to move.

'At last, I thought you were going to play those sad tunes all night.' Elliot says. 'This is Jose, Ana's friend, and this is Ethan, Kate's brother.' Elliot introduces. I shake their hands and nod politely before going to the kitchen.

'Matthew, are you hungry? No-one else wants anything but it's a while since you had lunch.' Mrs Jones asks.

'I am really hungry, is it not a bit rude though to eat when no-one else is.' I say.

'No, I'll make you something. I'm going to get Ana some tea, she looks so cold.'

'Thank you.' I say and make my way back over to Ana. I take her hands in mine, they are frozen. I don't even know if she's aware that I am holding them as she continues to stare at the fire. She has at least eaten a few of the grapes. Mrs Jones brings the tea over and as Ana takes it the cup rattles in the saucer, I take it from her, placing it on the coffee table.

'Do you want your food here?' Mrs Jones asks.

'Yes please, two forks.' I say. Mrs Jones raises an eyebrow but doesn't say anything. She then brings over a large bowl with lasagne and the two forks as requested. I start to eat and place one fork on the side.

Mom and Mia look at me before Mia says with a catch in her voice. 'You wouldn't be doing that if Christian was here' I just shrug my shoulders.

'Ana, this is my absolute favourite that Mrs Jones cooks for me. It's too good to share it all with you but I want you to try a mouthful. Will you do that for me?' I ask gently. She nods and taking the other fork I put a small amount on and then feed her. I continue to eat whilst she slowly finishes her mouthful. Each time she finishes I feed her again, I don't think she realises what she's doing but I'm just happy that she's eating. 'It's all gone now, would you like me to get you some more.' I whisper. She shakes her head. I pick up the teacup and place it in her hands. 'Drink this now.' I say and I'm rewarded with a small smile. She has no words but I understand that, it's easier not to talk sometimes.

Mom stares at me open mouthed before coming to her senses. She gets up and moves to where Elliot is. He drapes an arm around her shoulder. I get up to take my dish to the kitchen and Jose comes to sit next to Ana. I'm not so sure about him and want to tell him to go away. Ana belongs to Christian and she doesn't need other men around her. Mia moves to Ana's other side and takes her hand. I wander round the room, a bit lost as to what I should do. All these people here, yet I still feel so alone.

I move back towards the sofas. All of a sudden mom shrieks 'Christian' and she is running across the room. He's stood in the entrance to the great room. He looks totally bewildered to see everyone.

'Mom' he says as she throws her arms around him and kisses him hard on the cheek. Mom actually starts crying and Christian envelopes her in a hug, holding her close. He rocks her to and fro. Dad shouts 'He's alive' from the hallway, followed by 'Shit-you're here' and embraces both mom and Christian. Mia then makes a move and she is included in the hug with them all.

I move towards Ana, the tears have started to stream down her face. I wipe some away with my thumb, pulling her close and kissing her head 'Shh, don't cry, he's here.'

I hear Christian ask 'What's with the welcoming committee?' as he looks over. He looks up and his eyes scan the room until his eyes lock with Ana's. He blinks and glances briefly at Jose and then at me and his mouth tightens. Oh no, is he angry with me or is it with Jose, does he not like him either. Mom talks to Christian some more, before Elliot goes over and hugs him and then slaps him on the back before telling him it's great to see him.

I wipe Ana's tears again. Christian looks at mom and dad before saying 'I'm going to see my girl now.' They nod, smile and move aside. Christian moves towards us. Ana staggers to her feet and runs into Christian's open arms. He kisses her and they whisper to each other. She is then touching him, chest, arms, waist and he lets her. Jose shakes his hand and mutters something. I don't hear as I'm not listening, I'm lost in my own world. The rest of the family closes in; he pecks Kate on the cheek and shakes Ethan's hand. They all sit down and I move to the edge of the sofa, hugging my knees, and resting my chin on top. Mom strokes my hair before sitting. I just stare at them all. I can't speak.

Everyone is talking, asking questions. Christian is patiently answering them. He pulls Ana onto his knee, still whispering away to her. I feel so alone in my little world, all my family are here and yet I don't feel part of it. I held it together whilst he wasn't here and I'm trying so hard not to cry, especially in front of everyone. I stare at a spot in the distance, keeping myself totally detached. I didn't even hug him like everyone else, that would have set me off.

I hear Elliot saying rather suggestively that Christian needs his beauty sleep.

Mom looks adoringly at dad and says 'Cary, my son is safe. You can take me home now.' She stands and Christian moves Ana onto the sofa so that he can stand and hug mom once more. Everyone starts making a move towards the elevator. I follow automatically. Christian finally speaks to me.

'Hey little bro, you're very quiet. Are you ok?' he whispers in my ear. I look up at him and slowly shake my head.

'Do you want to stay?' Another shake.

'Are you going home in dad's car?' I nod.

'OK, I'll get your car dropped off tomorrow and I will call you.' He says looking concerned. I nod and hug him briefly and follow mom into the elevator. As the elevator descends they all chatter noisily and don't notice that I have no words.

'