Assuming Kim
Jack did as he said he would. He called in sick at 6:00 am and emailed his professors saying he's sick. We have the whole day, which is why he spent the night. No, we didn't do anything. Don't look at me like that. I swear!
We stayed up all night talking, watching movies, eating popcorn and drinking soda. Jack calls it pop, which is weird. Must be a Michigan thing.
So here we are, snuggled up in my hotel bed, and yes we're clothed. I'm telling you, this is strict friendship, most at Jack's request...
We just finished the Hobbit: Battle of the Five Armies. I won't spoil it for you if you haven't seen it, but it's intense and a tear jerker at the end. I usually don't cry. I almost did, but Jack saw it and pulled me tight. I focused on his body and his scent, forgetting about the movie and my near tears. He didn't say anything because it was a movie, but I think he may have been close to crying, too. Jack's a huge Tolkien guy, believe it or not.
I look at my phone and I realize it's 9:41 am. "Jack, maybe we should shower and get ready to do stuff?" That came out really awkward...
"Uh, Kim..."
"Separately shower and decide what we're doing today." I clarify.
"Gotcha." He nods in understanding. "Fair warning, I will use your hair products." Jack's hair is too good for hotel shampoo...
"Alright, but be ready to smell like strawberry..." he cuts me off.
"Strawberry kiwi." I can't help but burn up. He noticed such a small thing and he didn't have to even think about it. How has he been single for three years?
I realize we're still locked in our sad movie hug when Jack lets me go. We get out of bed and he hits the shower.
He's in for maybe two minutes before I hear his muffled voice.
I go to the bathroom door and hear him singing. Jack sings in the shower! This isn't any song, but Johnny Cash's the Ring of Fire. Maybe I'm just being a lonely teenager, but I like to think he's singing it for me. Yes I said lonely. My love life isn't great, alright?
Oh God... Am I using Jack? Am I taking all of his time because I'm lonely? But if he's lonely too, this is good, right?
My thoughts are broken when Jack the door opens and Jack walks out. He's dry but his hair is still a little damp, allowing droplets to streak down his neck and chest. Oh fuck.
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Assuming Jack
I left all my clothes in Kim's room? This has to be a joke. I tie a towel around my waste and hold the knot. I even left my clean boxer-briefs in my backpack with the rest of my clean clothes.
I open the door and Kim's right there. Was she listening to me singing? She's just standing there. Biting her lip in that way.
She holds up my backpack. "You forgot you clothes." She says, her eyes ever so slowly gliding down my body. I look down to see she's following a water drop rolling down my chest.
"May I have my backpack, please?" I ask with a chuckle. Her eyes get wider when my abs get tighter with my laughter. I have THE Kim Crawford all bothered? I didn't think that was how this worked.
"Oh, yeah." She snaps out of it and blushes something fierce. She hands me my backpack and I slip back into the bathroom. A moment later I'm dressed and out.
"My turn." She smiles and disappears into the bathroom. I hope she just means to shower. I had a hard enough time not kissing her in the hot tub last night. Her soft hot skin on mine had my brain swimming. Her lips were glistening from the water and I could hear the softness in her breath. How had I, little town Jack Brewer, affected Kim Crawford like that?
The way I felt last night, and the way I KNOW she felt, I don't think I'm some kind of act or right off to her anymore. What I can't understand is why she gives a fuck. I still don't get who I am to a celebrity worth millions. She doesn't care about the money, but I'm still a nobody.
I'm still standing where she left me by the bathroom door. Then I hear her sweet voice. It's loud, passionate and string, her soulful voice. She's singing I'm The Man by Aloe Blacc, but the way she sings it sends shivers up my spine. I think I get where she's going with this. Kim Crawford is serenading me from the shower, telling me I'm still strong.
She comes out after a while, fully dressed unlike I had been first. "Hi." Kim says with a smile, steam rolling out of the bathroom behind her.
"Hi." I smile back. This is the first time awkward has actually felt... good. "So what's the plan?"
"We can call Jerry and Rudy, see if they want breakfast?" Kim suggests.
"Yeah, that could work. Jerry doesn't go to school. Sam's still in highschool, so she'll have to catch up to us later." I inform her. "Jerry's sleeping, no doubt, but I can drag his ass out of bed."
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"I'm glad we all got together, guys." Rudy beams around the table. "I uh, I have a business proposal for you two." Rudy says and I look at him with suspicion. "You guys have had time to grow and hone your abilities. Kim's gotten really close to you, Jack. I've never seen her closer to anybody, and she told me about you saving her. Both times."
"Where are you going with this, Rudy?" I ask, feeling oddly tense.
"Where ARE you going with this?" Kim asks. Is she out of the loop, too?
"I should have asked you first, Kim, but I already drew up the paperwork." Paperwork? "Jack and Jerry, when we leave tomorrow morning, I want you two to come with us."
"WHAT?!" Kim, Jerry and I shout at once. We sheepishly look around to see the rest of the diner watching us.
Rudy digs into a case I didn't notice he came in with. He slides two files across the table to us. Upon opening the folder, I see that they're contracts.
"You want me and Jerry to sign on under you to be Kim's bodyguards?" My mouth is dry and my heart is pounding.
"That's what I'm saying, Jack." Rudy leans on his elbows and smiles. "Will you guys sign on with Gillespie Protections to serve and protect Kim Crawford?"
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Assuming Kim
I really wish Rudy would have let me know he was planning to offer Jack and Jerry a job! It would have given me time to prep for the heart attack I'm probably going to have.
Jack is speechless, his jaw threatened to drop through the table.
"Hell yeah! Got a pen?" Jerry asks, making grabby hands at the pen Rudy produces. Um, okay... But what about Jack? What will he do? He can come with me. We can keep this thing, whatever we have, going. The paychecks would easily pay for his tuit... He's going to turn it down because he's in school. My chest tightens as I watch Jack staring at the contract. I can't help the fact that I'm going to cry in 3... 2... 1...
Jack sighs loudly and I screw my eyes shut as my first tear drops. I can't believe I'm crying over a boy met not quite four days ago. Come on, Kim!
"Give me the pen." My heart stops. Did he just... I open my eyes as he signs the black line. "I'm in." He says, looking right at my watery eyes.
"Jack," I say with a shaky voice I hardly recognize. "Can I... can I talk to you for a moment?" Jack nods and we both leave the table.
"What's up?" his voice his hesitant. "Are you firing me already?" Jack chuckles.
I laugh a teary laugh and Jack's eyes drop. "Jack, don't change your whole life just for me." I think he saw me losing it, and he signed it out of guilt. I can't live with that. "I can't have you spend so much of your life around me if it isn't truly, absolutely what you want."
"Kim, this IS what I want. Rudy set the contract so I start in thirty days of signing. It gives me time to put in my two weeks, finish the semester and enroll online so I can stay in school. I can even put in my thirty days notice to get out of my lease without penalty."
"Jack, you barely looked at it! This is a huge change!" I really don't want you to do something you'd regret. I can't be happy if you're not." I say, my voice shuddering.
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Assuming Jack
I close my eyes and clench my fists. I'm not mad at her for thinking the way she is. I haven't told her enough about myself to be mad at her for it.
"Kim, I NEED to leave. I'm tired of this town, I'm tired of my work and I'm tired of everything about me." I tell her through gritted teeth. "I need to start new. I can't start soon enough."
Kim's eyes are soft and she looks like... she's pitying me. "Nope. Nu uh. Stop that face." I say sternly, pointing at her. "You don't have to pity me. I work too hard for that shit." I shake my head.
"So you re not coming just for me? You're doing this for you?" I can hear the pure joy in her voice.
"Kim, I'm a twenty year old single man with an okay job and a degree I can finish with online classes. This job, working with Rudy and protecting you... is the greatest thing that I could hope for. Jerry's coming, I don't even have to think about debt and student loans. This is my break, Kim!" I say meaning every word, shaking her by her shoulders, making her see how great this is.
Kim grabs my shoulders too, and before I could push her back, she pulls herself into me and kisses me hard.
Her lips are soft but she crashed right into me! Oh fuck it!
Kim gasps against my mouth when I dart my tongue out to trace her bottom lip. She pulls back and smiles wide, her eyes dancing. We meet in an open mouthed kiss, warm, wet and wonderful. I'm a little rusty on my tongue game, but Kim seems satisfied.
We hear a click and I see a bright flash. "Ms. Crawford, who's your boyfriend?" We turn to see a lone man with a camera.
"Don't move." I tell her as I turn on my toes and rush this guy. He turns to run but Jerry saw him come in, I guess, because Jerry catches him and pushes him back towards me. With a crescent kick, his camera hits the ground and shatters.
"Get out of here." He looks stunned. "I said go!" I shout and step up to him, making him really head for the hills. "Thanks, Jerry." We fist bump.
"No problem bro, glad to help." Jerry smiles and gives a very flustered Kim a half assed salute. "Ma'am." Jerry leaves us and goes back to Rudy who had watched the whole scene with a smile.
"Rudy made a good call in picking you two up." Kim smiles sheepishly as she smoothes out her hair. "If that guy had gotten that picture out there..."
"It's okay, he didn't." I assure her, ushering her back to the table from our place by the coat racks. "You don't have to worry about everyone thinking you're with just some guy." I chuckle as I sit down.
"Jack..." Wow that came out wrong.
"Stop right there, Kim. That came out sounding SO much worse than I meant. Can we talk about that later?"
"Yeah..." Kim still sounds unsure of the whole thing. That did sound rough.
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Assuming Kim
Jack and Jerry signed on to fill out the last two spots on my security detail, and the four of us are on cloud nine right now. We've been doing everything there is to do here in quiet Northborough.
I can't get Jack's comment from earlier out of my head, though. You don't have to worry about everyone thinking you're with just some guy. Is that why he waited so long to kiss me, why I had to kiss him? Just some guy.
"You okay, Kim?" Jack asks me, brushing his hand across mine. We're hanging out at his place, the four of us just hanging out and enjoying each others company. I've only known Jack for about four days now and Jerry for a total of a few hours, but I feel like they're old friends.
"Yeah, I'm fine." I say dismissively.
He stands from his spot next to me on the couch and walks to the kitchen doorway. The look on his face tells me to follow him, so I do.
"Spill." He orders simply.
"You don't have to worry about everyone thinking you're with just some guy." I quote him.
Jack throws his arms in the air groans. "THAT'S what's bugging you?"
"Yeah, Jack, it is." I cross my arms and lean against a counter top. "You're making me a smoothie later, by the way." I throw in with a huff after seeing the blender behind me.
"I sure will. But what I said earlier Kim, don't over think that." Jack says quietly and shakes his head.
"When are you going to understand that you're not average, Jack? When are you going to get that you AREN'T just some guy?" Is this an act? There's gotta be something going on here I'm missing.
"It's takes a lot to clear that hurdle, Kim!" Jack shouts, his hair in his hands. I try to take a step back, give him a little space but that damn counter too won't let me. He's coming closer. God do I feel small when he's so close.
"What are you talking about, Jack?" I can't believe how shallow my voice comes out. Was that even me?
"How was your dad growing up, Kim? How were your parents? Did they shoot down everything you wanted to do and replace it with what they wanted? When you worked your heart out would say 'oh, good job, Kim!' Or did they tear you down and tell you that you never hit the bar they wanted?" Jack's voice was breaking, and my heart was right behind it.
"When you had your first relationship, did you give him everything you had and he just dropped it back at your feet? Did you ask for a day off on your anniversary to have it rain checked?" Who does that? "Did you run away from home because you thought your parents didn't care about you, and you begged them to stop fighting all the fucking time BUT THEY NEVER DID?!"
"Jack..."
"I'm not finished!" Tears are streaming down his face and I can feel them on mine, coming down just as fast. "I left home when I was barely seventeen. I slept on Jerry's couch for four months when we both started for Rudy and we got this place with that other guy you met the other day. My life's a wreck and Donna, Jerry and Rudy are all I have. I'm a fucking mess and I even tried cutting.
"Donna can't handle me. She's pissed because 'I can't get a hold of myself.' She gets distant and I end it! I gave my parents all I had. I gave Donna all I had. AND THEY FUCKING LEFT ME FOR DEAD OR MADE ME FEEL LIKE I WAS DEAD!"
Jack all out screams and he doubles over, his hands on his knees. His face is clenched tightly and starts wheezing. What the fuck is happening?! He's going down!
I'm right at his side, helping to the floor and resting him on me, his head in my lap. "Jack, please calm down. What's happening to you?" His breathing is ragged and laborious. Is he having a panic attack?
We sit/lay here like this for a few minutes when he finally slows his breathing. He pushes out quietly, weakly, "And I know you're going to leave me too."
The hand I've been rubbing through his hair stops. Jack has abandonment issues. After his blow out, I get that now. He was never allowed to feel like he was anything. He was never allowed to have an ego or self-esteem. Any earned confidence was torn away from him.
"I won't leave you, Jack. You saved me from rape! You caught a guy that tried to fucking drug me! You did all that within two days of knowing me. You didn't even know it was me in that Jeep. That guy could have been armed an you gave no fucks, Jack. There's nothing average about you. There's nothing about you I could leave now that I know you." I wipe away my tear that just fell on his forehead and replace it with a kiss.
"I'm sorry, Kim. I shouldn't have just thrown that at you." His voice is still weak, it's rough and yet somehow still soft.
"In a month, it'll be your job to protect me, to keep me safe. You've been the best friend I could ask for these last couple days." I kiss his forehead again. "Hearing you out and holding you during a panic attack that you can't help is the least I can do." This time I go straight for his lips.
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Assuming Jack
I hate panic attacks. I hate depression. I hate feeling useless. I didn't to blow up on Kim. I really didn't want to. But here we are on my kitchen floor, my head in Kim's lap. She's been giving me a head rub for the last hour, kissing me occasionally while she tells me about her childhood. I wish I could have been there with her. I'm going to risk sounding corny, clichéd and all of that by saying I wish I could have met her sooner. I feel like it would have made a huge difference in how I'm seeing myself. I can't really explain why or how, but once it's ingrained in your head that you are and have never been anything other than a giant piece of shit, that feeling is really hard to shake, alright?
I slowly sit up, Kim's hand supportively on my back. "Well that sucked." I say running a hand through my hair. "I wonder what happened to Jerry and Rudy…" We have been in the kitchen alone for a good thirty-five minutes.
The two of us walk into the living room and see no sign of them. There is a note on the front door though…
Jack and Kim,
Went somewhere else to do the other thing at that somewhere else. Call if you need anything
- Jerry and Rudy
"Let's call them back." I say with a groan.
"Do we have too?" Kim looks at me from under her eyelashes, her bottom lip jutting out. Good God, this woman!
"We should, but we don't really have to… Why?" She's gotta have something in mind.
"I have to leave tomorrow and I won't see you for a month. I'm being totally selfish here, but can't we just do our thing?"
"And what exactly is 'our thing?'" I ask crossing my arms, looking at her suspiciously.
"Whatever we want to do, just us. We'll catch up with them when Sam gets out of school." she offers. If she tries to give Kim a demo tape, I swear…
"Alright." I smile, enjoying her plan. "I'm really tired anyway. Panic attacks always make me feel like I just ran a marathon." I stay where I am because she still hasn't told me what we're doing. she's in the driver's seat. Quite literally, if we go somewhere.
"Want to go start some shit in Westborough?" Kim asks with a wicked grin.
"Westborough? What do you know about Westborough?" I grill her. No…
"Nothing." She says as her eyes dart anywhere but mine.
"Damn it, Kim! Did you go to Westborough without talking to me first?! That place is dangerous! That place is nothing but druggies, rapists, and thieves! The Wasabis used to go patrol the Westborough Mall for practice when Rudy was our sensei."
"I may or may not have gone to the Westborough Mall yesterday to get an outfit for dinner tonight." Kim tries to look innocent, but there lies the proof of her guilt.
"Two things." I start, holding up two fingers, "You didn't need an outfit just for dinner and a movie here." I drop the finger but Kim jumps in.
"But it's really cute." she argues.
"Everything you wear is cute." I'm going to keep going and pretend I didn't let that slip. "Two. I know you can take care of yourself, but you should have asked me. I'm not trying to control you, don't get me wrong." I had to say that before she goes into the 'I'm a strong independant woman' speech. "But I know the area and you don't, that's it. I don't want you getting lost or ending up in a sticky situation, alright? The guy that jumped you at the gas station Friday? That's Jeff. I went to highschool with him. He lived in Westborough before he moved here in Junior year."
"I should have asked you, but I DID take care of myself. I'm a blackbelt too, you know."
"I saw the video, Kim. The security footage was on the news." Her jaw drops and she looks more pissed than anything.
"They put that on the news?!" Kim is definitely livid. "How'd they get the footage?"
"Westborough is Sleaze Town U.S. A, Kim. They recognized you and sold it to E! News for a hell of a payday. They called you a 'singing, acting badass.'" I tell her with a chuckle. "You did kick ass, too. I laughed aloud when you tackled the third guy. I was worried till you went on the offensive." I cringe a little, having realized I admitted I was worried.
"You were worried about me?" she asked softly. Yup, of course she latches onto that.
"Yes Kim, I was worried about you." I say, rolling my eyes. "Jerry pulled up the video while we were working last night. You were there when he showed me, so I knew you were okay. I still can't handle the idea that you could have been hurt." I mouth needs to stop spewing before my mind can tell it to shut up!
"The outfit was worth it." Kim smiles. She's such a girl. A hot, sensitive, badass girl that I don't want to lose for a month.
Kim hasn't been shy about affectionate displays, though we haven't talked about a relationship. She hasn't SAID she wants one, but I'm not blind to signals. I also have so much baggage I need my own handler at the airport. She wants me to see that I deserve her, but I want her to see that I actually don't. It's going to be a rough game of Tug of War, but we'll see who wins. I think this coming month will tell us a lot. I'm honestly really torn between myself and Kim, you know? I'm having a hard time believing she really does want anything more than friendship with me, but friends don't kiss like we did today. Friends don't look at each other like we did in the hot tub and pool yesterday. She's a world famous actor who's working on her first album, too. I'm a line cook! Do you see the difference here that she seems to ignore for me? She swears I'm better than I think, but my personal experience nearly promises I'm going to fuck this up. I need help. She thinks she can be that help, I think. I really wish I had a crystal ball.
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If you guys read my last story and have been following me through this, you've learned I like to play with Jack's emotions and ruin his life in general. This is most definitely true. A lot of the stories I've read have been Kim in some kind of trouble and Jack coming to the rescue. I enjoy having elements of that in here, but I like the idea of Jack needing saving. With that being said, might I suggest to you Possession by code name baron if you aren't following that on here as well?
One last thing, this isn't a song fic, and neither was You're Not Alone, but at the beginning of every chapter I had song suggestions that were my muses or fit with the chapters. Would you like me to do that again with this story?