'That was a long five minutes.' Mom says when I finally stop in front of the steps.
'Sorry.' I mutter.
'Don't be darling; you looked like you were enjoying yourself. It was good to watch you. It took me back to when you were small and you wanted to play out here and you used to beg me to watch.' Mom says.
'It felt good mom, like it was before I had anything to worry about.' I say going to sit on the step next to her.
'Darling boy, don't worry about anything. Dad and Christian will sort out everything over the next few days. Your businesses and money will continue in the hands of the people that are in place now. You just have to concentrate on getting your strength back and being fully fit. Enjoy your time away from everything and everyone. You'll have enough pressure on you trying to get into university without anything else that's going on.' Mom says and she leans against my shoulder. I put my arm round her to pull her into a hug.
'Where's Hannah?' I ask.
'She watched you for a while and then went to phone her mom.' She says. 'Darling, would you be upset if she went back to live with her mom?'
'Yes.' I mutter not even wanting to think about it.
'They miss each other. Hannah is putting a brave face on it at the moment.' Mom says gently.
'Mom, I wouldn't stop her. It might even be for the best whilst we're still at school, though if it happens I'd like to spend the weekends together, either here or at her house if her mom will have me.' I say.
'I'm sure she will and of course Hannah is welcome here. It might not happen but I thought I should warn you just in case.' Mom says.
'Thanks mom. I'm sure you would have been pretty strict with us anyway on school nights.' I say smiling at her.
'Extremely, if she does move back home you'll probably have more freedom to come and go. I don't want your grades slipping though.' Mom says.
'As if mom. I mean I have to beat Christian and I'm sure he must have hit almost full marks in everything he's such a perfectionist.' I say.
'You've always wanted to beat him in everything. Even when you could first talk you would always say 'I want to be better than Christian' what is the obsession with beating your brother?' she asks.
'Mom, you know how competitive he is. He never lets anyone win at anything. Elliot and I can thrash him at video games but at everything else he has the upper hand and he knows it. There's ten years between us yet when it comes to competing he has always treated me as an equal so it's only now that I have any chance and even now I'll have to wait until I'm fully fit. He never even let me win at scrabble and I was only just learning to spell the words and he would come up with words I'd never even heard of, I never stood a chance and yet I always went back for more.' I say.
'You adored him though. It was lovely watching you growing up always wanting to be with him. He only ever really showed his softer side with you, occasionally with Mia. At times I thought he would never let anyone get close to him but with you he never had a problem. He's always been different with you.' Mom says.
'I know and I need to respect him for that mom, that's why I'll let him dictate to me about security and the media. He's only doing it to protect me. It does help when he explains why though, before he never used to and I just thought he was trying to control me. Hopefully we'll get along better now that I know where he's coming from and why he's been so over protective. It always used to frustrate me before and I would always be pushing in the opposite direction. I would just make him so angry that he would scare me. I know I've argued back a bit in the last few weeks but he still intimidates me.' I say.
'It's his way of showing he cares about you.' Mom says. 'I think he'll try and be a bit more reasonable now you know everything.'
'Hopefully.' I mutter.
'Matt, dad said last night that you were bullied at school. Why haven't you said anything before?' mom asks gently.
'Because Christian would have had the boy strung up and made the situation worse. Mom I coped with it. I learned to stay out of the way and sat on my own most of the time. It was one boy in particular that was the worst, he was Hannah's ex-boyfriend who was killed by the bus. A few others joined in with him occasionally. Let's hope they don't ask me for a job in the future.' I say with a smirk.
'Or even your brother. They will be lucky to find a job in this city.' Mom says.
'I better go and shower, I slept in these clothes last night.' I say.
'Did you sleep well though?' mom asks.
'Yes thanks. Considering I was on my own I had a great night and again I felt really relaxed when I woke first thing.' I say as I stand and help mom up off the step.
'Good, I'm so happy that you sleep well there.' Mom says quietly and I go and hug her. 'I know I have to let you go but I'm going to miss you so much.'
'Mom the others have all moved out and gone on holiday before.' I say.
'I know but darling you're the youngest. It just feels so much harder letting you go.' Mom says.
'Mom, I'll be still living here the next year and then hopefully when I have finished university I'll be living next door. I'm hardly going far. Elliot has his house in the city, Christian has Escala and his new house on the sound which is really beautiful and even Mia has her apartment which she uses occasionally but I will only go as far as next door, that sounds a bit pathetic doesn't it.' I say.
'No not at all. If you're happy that's all that matters. Go and shower, I have a few things I need to do before work.' Mom says.
'OK mom, I'll catch up with you before we leave.' I say and kiss her cheek before heading upstairs to the shower. Once I'm clean and dressed in fresh clothes I go and find Hannah. She's not in the house and I find her in one of my favourite spots at the end of the jetty.
'Hey baby.' I say as I sit down beside her and kiss her head. She turns to me and it's obvious she's been crying. 'Hannah, what's wrong?' I ask.
'I miss mom.' She says as fresh tears slip down her cheeks. I wipe them away gently with my thumbs and then take her in my arms. 'Sorry, I'm being silly. We had so many arguments before I moved here and now I finally decide I miss her.'
'We can stop by and see her before we go to the airport if you want to.' I say.
'Are you sure?' she asks.
'Yes of course, I wouldn't have said it otherwise. Did you tell her about me?' I say.
'Yes, I think she was shocked.' She says.
'She's not the only one.' I mutter.
'She appreciated that I'd told her before it goes in the papers. I hope you don't mind but I did tell her that you'd pay her mortgage and make sure she was OK but she said she would manage.' Hannah says.
'Hannah I don't want her to manage. What's the point in us having so much money we don't know what to do with it when your mom is struggling from month to month? Tell her if she won't take it directly I'll order you and mom so many flowers each day that she won't need anyone elses business. The press would probably run a headline that we live in luxury whilst your poor mom lives in poverty. I'm only paying the house off so that she can run the florists still and live without worrying where her next meal is coming from.' I rant.
'Have you finished?' Hannah asks.
'Sorry, I shouldn't have got cross.' I mutter.
'Hey it's fine, it shows you care.' She says.
'Let me take you next door to show you inside the house.' I say standing up and taking her hand.
'Really, are you sure?' she asks.
'Yes, I'm really comfortable being there now. I want to show you and see what you think.' I say as we walk up the garden. I unlock the gate and holding her hand walk towards the patio doors. 'Are you ready?' I whisper nervously. I really hope she likes it. She nods and I unlock the door. I grip her hand tightly through nerves as I walk her into the family room at the back with the piano. I can hardly breathe and my chest is tight as I wait for her reaction. Hannah is very quiet as she looks around the room with wide eyes. I walk her through and then we enter the kitchen, the dining room, the living room, the conservatory. 'Hannah, please tell me what you're thinking? You haven't said anything yet.' I say quietly.
'It's very big.' She whispers.
'That was daddy's study.' I say waving my hands towards the door 'And that other door is mommy's office. Let me show you upstairs.' I add as we climb the wide staircase still holding hands. 'This was my bedroom.' I say as we enter. 'I slept here last night.'
'Oh Matt, were you OK?'
'Yes, I was fine. Come, let's look in the other rooms up here.' I say and lead her out and into some of the other rooms. 'Not that one.' I say walking past the one where mommy and daddy slept. 'I'm sorry, I can't go in that one yet, it's too much.' Hannah turns and hugs me and kisses my cheek. I kiss her forehead.
'You'll get there one day, you've come so far in such a short space of time.' She says gently.
'Hannah, please tell me what you really think of this house.' I whisper. She looks at me in surprise.
'You're worried about my reaction.' She says. I nod. 'Matt, it's beautiful. I loved it from the outside but it's even better once you're inside. It feels so comfortable, I feel like I was meant to walk in and be totally relaxed. It's a strange feeling, really hard to describe.'
'Do you think you could live here eventually?' I ask nervously.
'Durrrh. Of course I could. I feel like it's home already.' She says smiling at me. I grin back at her and pick her up to spin her around. 'There's a lot of pictures of you about.'
'We can take them down.' I say.
'No, I like them. Eventually we can replace them with our children if you want to.' She says.
'Children.'
'Yes, you do want them don't you?' she asks.
'Yes, with you definitely.' I say and kiss her cheek. She turns suddenly and kisses my lips and then deepens the kiss. I groan. I want her badly. I pull away slightly. 'Baby we shouldn't be kissing like this.'
'Shhh. Just kiss me.' She whispers. I move back towards her and find her mouth once more. My hand moves automatically towards her breast and she moans. I open the nearest door and walk backwards towards the bed, my lips never leaving hers. She unzips me and releases my erection. I am so desperate to be inside her to make love to her. Turning I lower her onto the bed and after a quick feel inside to see how wet she is I push myself into what has become my favourite place. I open my eyes and look at her, totally mesmerised by her beauty. I start to move slowly and she matches my pace before picking it up. We move together as one before she finally comes and I release myself into her. I collapse on top of her, kissing her cheek once more.
'I love you.' I whisper.
'I love you too.' She whispers back before looking around. Her eyes widen. 'Matt, you didn't show me this room.' I look up. Shit, how did I get so distracted? I know why but I now roll off Hannah and close my eyes. I open one slowly and Hannah is staring at me. 'Are you OK?' she asks. I nod and breathe deeply opening both eyes and then sitting up. I look round and tears spring to my eyes. Hannah squeezes my hand realizing where we are. I stand and walk to the window to look at the view before going to the en-suite bathroom. Hannah is still sat on the bed watching me as I emerge and walk round the room again. Finally I walk out and she follows me. As I walk down the stairs my phone vibrates and I answer it automatically.
'Christian.' I say.
'Where are you?' he asks.
'Why?' I ask. Hannah has followed me out onto the decking and I lock the door. I take her hand as we walk down the garden.
'Because you sound guilty as if you're up to something.' He says with a sigh.
'I was just showing Hannah round my house.' I whisper.
'Oh, did she like it?' he asks. I look at Hannah and smile at her and she smiles back.
'Yes, a lot.' I say.
'You're happy.' He says.
'Yes very.' I whisper.
'Good. I'm pleased for you. I'm just on my way back to work.' Christian says.
'What did Elliot and Mia say?' I ask.
'Mia was shocked initially but then grinned and asked if she had any chance of getting a monthly allowance out of you like I give her. Elliot had some idea but didn't realise the scale of how much so he wasn't quite as shocked. They're both pretty cool about it all though. I've warned Mia that she has to behave while you're away and the need for security at all times, her and Ana are as bad as one another for security. You'll have to keep Hannah under control and I've warned Elliot about Kate as well though she'll be like the other two. I think Hannah should listen to you though.'
'She will.' I say confidently.
'How can you be so sure, she might get led astray by the others.' Christian says.
'She won't. I just know that she'll do as she's told.' I say. Hannah widens her eyes. 'Yes, I'm talking about you.' I say to her. She smiles at me and nods.
'She's there listening.' He says.
'Yes and she's just nodded at me and smiled so she will listen when it comes to security.' I say to him. I sit down with Hannah on the swing seat. We continue to hold hands as I chat with Christian and she watches the boats on the lake.
'I thought I'd have the most trouble with you two seeing how you were both always so naughty and mischievous but you surprise me at every turn. You're both still so young yet you've listened and taken it more seriously than the others.' He says.
'Christian, we're both so scared of making mistakes and terrified by what it all entails. We have to listen to you and dad so that we can have some normality in our life. We will be careful and always be conscious about security. I realise now why you've always been so over protective and I appreciate everything you have done already.' I say.
'Thanks little bro. It's easier now you realise and we can talk about it all. When I couldn't tell you I would just get so frustrated and angry with you. I'm so grateful that you're both listening to me though. I'll help you get through this until you are ready and strong enough to cope on your own.' He says.
What if I'm never ready?' I ask without confidence.
'Then I'll still be there for you just like dad is for me even now. As long as we stick together we'll be fine.' Christian says.
'Thanks big bro.' I say cheekily. 'Mom actually let me play on my skateboard this morning.'
'Are you ever going to grow up?' he asks.
'Not just yet. I'm not ready to.' I say. I let go of Hannah's hand and put my arm round her shoulder pulling her close. Christian laughs at me. 'Mom's not ready to let go either, she said it's harder with me than it ever was with you, Elliot or Mia.'
'That's because you're the youngest. She won't be too bad this time while you're on holiday or even when you're in London because she's helping get everything arranged for the wedding but it will be this time next year when you're getting ready for university that it will hit her hard.' He says.
'Do you think I should go?' I ask standing up and walking towards the edge of the lake. Hannah stays on the swing seat and I turn to watch her.
'Yes, I think you need to. You'll end up living next door to mom and dad so it will be good for you to be away for a while.' He says.
'How do you know I'll end up living here?' I ask.
'Matt, you slept there alone through choice and you were relaxed about it. You sounded so happy when you just picked up the phone and Hannah is happy as well, you did sound guilty though. Did I interrupt something?' he asks.
'No.' I say.
'You'd just finished though.' He says. I don't say anything. 'I knew you'd been up to something.' I can tell he's smiling.
'OK so yes we did but please don't embarrass me any further with your probing questions and please don't say anything to Hannah when you see her. I don't want you to embarrass her.'
'I won't say anything, I promise. One question though. Where?' he asks.
'Christian please.' I say. 'It's none of your business. How about I ask you when the last time you and Ana made love.'
'This morning but that's all I'll tell you.' He says and I know he's grinning at the thought. 'OK enough, I don't even know why I'm discussing this with you.'
'Because you started the conversation.' I say walking back towards Hannah. 'To finish off what you were asking earlier yes I think we will end up living here. We're both happy. It's secure and mom and dad are next door, with all my insecurities I was never going to go too far from them.'
'You're getting there though.' He says. 'Matt, why didn't you tell me you were bullied at school?'
'Who told you?' I ask as a delaying tactic.
'Dad' he says. 'He just asked if I knew.'
'You would have lost it and sent Taylor in to sort them out if you didn't come charging in yourself.' I mutter. I sit back down next to Hannah and she leans against me. I wrap my arm round her once more.
'Was it that bad?' he asks.
'Some days were worse than others. I learnt where I could go and where I couldn't.' I say.
'Shit Matt, I wasn't there to help you.' Christian says.
'Only because I didn't tell you. You can't help me if I don't ask.' I say.
'Fair point well made. Will you ask if you have any more trouble when you return.' He asks.
'Yes.' I say rolling my eyes.
'Did you just roll your eyes at me?' he asks. How does he know?
'Yes.' I say doing it again.
'It's a good job you're not small enough for me to punish anymore. I'm calculating your misdemeanours though and will take it out on you when you can kick box again.' He says and I know he's smiling.
'Bring it on.' I say laughing at him.
'You'll be sorry.' He says.
'I won't, even if you thrash me I won't care. I'll just be happy that I can kick box again.' I say.
'I have to go. I'm back at Grey house and I've got meetings and press releases to sort out. We're going to send it the minute the jet takes off and then you're out of the way. Are you happy with that?' he asks.
'Yes, if it has to be done then I'm happy.' I say pulling Hannah closer to me.
'It has to be done. Take care and have a good flight. Call me when you get there, I can update you then on all the developments.'
'OK, thanks Christian.' I say.
'Before I go I need to remind you no sex on my jet.' He says.
'I promise.' I say and kiss Hannah's head.
'Thanks, see you soon little bro.' he says and hangs up so I'm left looking at the phone.
'You and Christian are getting on well.' Hannah says.
'We are at the moment.' I say as I stand and take her hand. 'We need to go back next door and get everything together. Hannah, you will do as you're told about security, won't you?' I ask uncertainly.
'Of course I will.' She says and smiles at me.
'It's just Christian is having problems with Ana realising she needs someone with her and Mia hates having people with her and he reckons Kate will put up a fight as well but I just want you to be safe baby otherwise I will worry about you.' I say.
'Hey, I'd worry about you as well so as long as we both have it then we'll be OK. I promise I'll make sure there is always someone with me and I'll call you if I'm uncertain about anything but will you promise to always have your phone on you in case I need you.' She says.
'I promise.' I say as we head into the kitchen back home.