Chapter 38

I don't own Lucian

Holy Shit! You guys! 70 reviews on the last chapter? I am truly speechless right now. THANK YOU!

About the cliffhanger, it isn't my fault. Back when I wrote this chapter I tweeted about having a cliffhanger or not and everyone agreed with me to go with a cliffhanger. So that one isn't on me! ;)

Lucy's POV

"What are you doing here?" Ian asks taken back by my presence.

I push up from the couch to stand on my feet bringing me closer to his height. Taking a deep breath I look him in the eye.

"We need to talk."

Ian nods his head in agreement, "we do. Where's Brea?"

"She's laying down for her nap." I tilt my head over to where she is.

Not wanting to waste time I get right to the point.

I cross my arms over my chest looking at my husband. "What's going on Ian? Why have you been acting the way you have?" I try to keep my tone even and voice lowered. The last thing I want it to do is wake Brea up.

Ian opens his mouth several times to speak up only to close it every time and shake his head. I roll my eyes at his reluctance to talk.

"Fine I'll be blunt. Why do you keep pushing me away when it comes to sex? You were all over me the other day and now you recoil from me. Am I not enough for you anymore?" I whisper faintly, my emotions start to get the best of me.

"No! What, no Lucy. That's not—that isn't what this is about. You know I love you and I will always want you."

"Do I? The way you've been pushing me off of you doesn't seem like you want me at all."

"I do Lucy! I truly do want you. I want nothing more than to make love to you right now." He exasperates.

"Then why don't you?" I shout at him furiously. He is being difficult and it is just pissing me off.

"Because!" He runs his hands through his hair aggressively like he always does when he is frustrated.

"Because. Really, that is your excuse?" I scoff and push past him to grab Brea's car seat. Ian lightly grasps ahold of my bicep to halt my movement.

"Where are—." Ian starts but stops when there is a knock on his trailer door followed by the door opening up a second later.

"I'm sorry to interrupt but you're needed on set for your next scene, Ian. They are starting much earlier than planned." Ari says sheepishly having clearly overheard our fight.

Ian glances back over at me with a torn expression; unsure of what to do.

"Go. I'm leaving anyway." I pull my arm out of his grasp and continue back to where Brea is sleeping. I know I am going to pay for interrupting her nap like I had the last time this happened but I am not staying here for an hour.

Carefully, I pick her up and move her over to the car seat and buckle her in with as little movement as possible. I tuck her blanket around her along with her goose in hopes of keeping her asleep. I drop my iPad in my purse, toss Brea's bag on my shoulder followed by my purse on my forearm, and then head out without another word spoken to Ian.

It is just after six o'clock in the evening. At the moment I am in the laundry room washing Brea's ungodly amount of onesie and adorable outfits she keeps spiting up on and getting dirty during the day causing her to go through half a dozen ensembles nearly every day. Brea is downstairs in her play pin in the living room since that is where I had been cleaning before coming upstairs to swap the laundry over.

"Hey," Ian's voice murmurs softly from behind.

I jump, slightly startled from his sudden presence. "Hi," I reply curtly before returning my focus to the laundry in front of me.

"We need to finish talking." Ian trails off hesitantly.

"I tried talking, remember? It was you who didn't want to talk back." I retort as I continue to fold the pair of jeans in my hands.

"Will you please turn around?" Ian asks softly. I sigh knowing what is going on between us is simply stupid. I turn around to face Ian like he asked and notice his slightly disheveled appearance. "I'm sorry Lucy, for everything. I love you, you know I love you."

"Then what is going on with you? Why don't you want me sexually?" I finally speak up in a broken voice.

"It's not that I don't want you Lucy because I do. God I do, but I can't." He shakes his head solemnly.

"Why not?" I press further.

"Because I hurt you! I swore I would never hurt you and I did. I was selfish when we made love that first night once you were cleared. I was too hyped up on us finally making love that I got carried away and it was too much for you. When you told me you were sore the next day and we couldn't have sex it threw me." Ian shouts in frustration.

Ian runs his hand through his hair pausing for a moment while I stare at him in shock.

"I shouldn't have gotten that carried away and in result of my desires you were hurting. You had just given birth for god's sakes and I—." Ian shakes his head in defeat.

"Why didn't you tell me? Why did you keep pushing me away every single time I came on to you? I thought you didn't like my body or something when I was dressing up for you."

"That isn't it! I can't say no to you Lucy, I just can't. You have this power over me that causes me to give into your every desire. I kept running off because if I were to have stayed one more second I would have caved. Between the lingerie and that sexy dress you had on, God that dress, it was killing me to resist you. I have been pushing you away because I am terrified of hurting you again or something happening that could prevent us from having more kids."

"Ian, I am okay! I am perfectly fine. You should have told me what was going on and I would have explained it to you. We can still make babies just fine, we just have to actually have sex to do that." I joke trying to lighten the mood.

"I don't know. I have no idea how that all works. All I know is I hurt you." Ian looks broken. His face also portrays his defeat.

"Ian," I walk forward to loop my arms around his neck effectively pressing our chests together. "I am just fine. Besides, you didn't hurt me you simply made me sore. I wanted everything we did that night. I love when we get carried away and have an entire night of sex."

"But I still made you sore which is just like you being in pain. Both cause discomfort. How do you know for sure everything is fine?"

"You've made me sore in the past with some of our wild sex experiences over the years and I am just fine and had a baby. This isn't any different." I shrug passively. My fingers toy with the baby hairs on the back of his neck.

"This has happened before?" Ian asks in disbelief. "Why didn't you ever say anything? When? How?"

He continues to ramble nonstop causing me to rise up on my toes to pull his lips down to mine to shut him up. I then proceed to tell him how his impeccable abilities in bed have a way of tiring me out and making me sore on a couple of previous occasions when things had gotten really crazy. After calming him down and getting it through to him that I am in fact okay and will be he is much more at ease.

"I just want to know why it was so hard for you to tell me?"

"I didn't want you to pass it off as if it were nothing. I couldn't make love to you knowing I had hurt you."

I sigh softly. "Can we make a promise right now that something like this won't happen again? No avoiding each other or running around. Just the plain, simple, honest truth."

We kiss on the promise. I snuggle closer in his chest and smile at the feeling of finally being held in my husband's arms.

"So does this mean we are back to ourselves now?"

I nod my head happily. Finally everything is cleared up.

"How do you feel now?"

"Just fine, why?"

Ian doesn't respond verbally. Instead he lifts me up to wrap my legs around his waist and presses me up against the wall in the laundry room. I moan loudly into his mouth when his lips attacks mine. I pull him closer to me and fist his hair in my hands. Ian walks us out of the laundry room and crushes me up against the wall in the hallway.

My hands reach down to grab the hem of his shirt successfully yanking it over his head and down to the floor. We continue to shed layers of clothing as we make our way down the hallway to our bedroom—sliding across the walls on the way.

I throw my head back and moan when his lips travel down to ravish my neck and exposed chest. Ian's hands unclasp my bra where he drops it right outside our room. Next his hands move down to my panties. He rips them off without an ounce of struggle and drops the shredded lace to the floor to join the discarded bra. Pulling away from the wall he carries me through the door to our bedroom. Ian tosses my naked body down on the bed. I stare up at him in lust. My eyes roam his body in desire upon seeing I stripped him of every single article of clothing in our blind kiss. He doesn't hesitate to climb on top of me and allow his hands to run all over my body.

Our mouths connect once more in desperation. My left hand runs down his back whereas my right hand remains in his hair holding his body down against mine. Ian centers his erection to my core for him to slowly penetrate me. I mewl at the familiar feeling of slight pressure then smooth penetration every time his large member enters me. I always revel in the feeling.

"Are you okay?" Ian asks intently, stilling his penetration.

I nod my head happily, "never been better."

I rock my hips up against his wanting more of him. Ian slowly fills me to the hilt and we both moan in pleasure. Our lips don't leave one another's as we make love. His thrust are languid and smooth; very filling. Hands are roaming all over. A light sheet of sweat is building up on both our bodies.

"Ian," I cry out and cling on to him as I experience my first climax. He picks up his pace a tad making his thrusts have a little more force to extend my orgasm.

Ian ducks his head down to my neck where he proceeds to kiss and suck on every inch of flesh his lips come across. I struggle to catch my breath from all these overwhelming feelings I have been craving from him for so long. A loud moan surpasses my lips due to Ian playfully biting my sweet spot on the right side of my neck. He pays a great deal of attention to the specific spot.

Ian's right arm moves down the mattress to slip underneath the small of my back effectively pulling my body up against his. There isn't even a centimeter between our bodies. He continues to hold me flush against his body as his marvelous hips thrust rhythmically. The new angle causes his penis to rub along my clit with ever thrust driving me rapidly towards my next orgasm.

I call out when he brings me to my next release. My walls clamp down around him gipping him firmly. My back arches against him and my toes curl at the sensations running through my body. Ian gives one more hard thrust and stills his hips whilst deep inside of me. I smile and hum softly in pleasure when I feel him release inside of me. We lay here clinging together until he has completely ridden his entire climax.

Ian's arms hold me securely to his body as he rolls over bringing him to lie on his back and I snuggle into his side. Our legs intertwine and our bodies mold together like the perfect puzzle pieces they have always been.

"I love you." Ian says softly into the silent room. His fingers comb through my hair soothingly.

I nuzzle my head deeper into his chest. "I love you."

"I'm sorry for the way I made you feel; that I made you think you weren't enough."

Lifting my head up from his neck I turn his face to look at me. "Don't. I know that wasn't your intensions but let's not dwell on that any more. We resolved our issue, there's no need to look back now." Laying my head back down I press a kiss to his chest and snuggle closer to him.

We enjoy our intimate moment for a few more minutes until I speak up.

"I need to go check on Brea, she's been alone in her play pin for a while now." I murmur into Ian's chest. I press a kiss to his bare chest before I start to pull away from our naked embrace.

"I'll go get her, you stay right there." Ian kisses me longingly just prior to getting out of bed.

"Thank you," I murmur back in response. My eyelids repeatedly drop out of tiredness. I didn't get much sleep last night and on top of that Ian's orgasms have a way of making me very tired at times. I snuggle my head into one of the pillows since I no longer have Ian's body to cuddle with. It isn't long until I am drifting off to sleep.

Ian's POV

I feel a huge weight lifted off of my chest now that Lucy knows why I have been pushing her away. I love her so much that the mere thought of hurting her in any way kills me. I'm glad she explained it to me and I know for sure that she is okay. Once she had assured me all was fine I couldn't help myself, I had to make love to her right then and there.

It has been incredibly difficult to push her away this past week. I don't want this to ever happen again.

After I had gotten Brea and brought her up to our bedroom earlier I saw Lucy had fallen asleep. I covered her up with a light weight blanket then returned downstairs with Brea. I had planned on making us something to eat but decided against it and wanted to order in instead. Deciding on Chinese food I order a plethora of options for us to have.

Brea and I play in the living room while I wait for the food to arrive. I see Lucy has gotten her some new toys that Brea clearly loves because she is holding the multicolored toy in her left hand as she shakes it about making it emit noises from the little beads inside of it. In her right hand she keeps ahold of her little goose.

I can't believe how big she is getting. It seems like every day she is growing more and more right before my eyes. Before long she is going to be the same size as Lucy. I think it'd be cute if Brea inherited her mother's small height but Lucy doesn't agree with that. She says being short can be a pain so she wants Brea to be at least 5' 5 and not an inch shorter.

Mochi, Bailey, and Jack were running around the house rough-housing so I sent them out into the back yard since Brea is on the floor.

About half an hour later the doorbell rings signifying our food has arrived. I climb up off of the floor to go get the door. However, once I got up to walk away Brea's happy demeanor disappeared and she started crying.

"Hey pumpkin what's wrong?" I lean down to scoop her up and she is instantly happy again.

I hold Brea in my arms while walking over to the door. I pay the delivery kid and take the bag from him.

"See everything is alright, daddy is right here." I press a kiss to Brea's temple in an assuring manner.

Placing the bag on the kitchen table I lay out all of the food and set the table.

"Now we need to go wake mommy up. What are you doing goofball?" I laugh as Brea presses her open hand against my nose and face. Her hands clasp around my bottom lip tugging on it curiously.

By now we have entered the bedroom to see Lucy still snuggled in our bed fast asleep. I sit Brea down in the play pin we keep in our bedroom so we don't have to keep hauling the one from downstairs back and forth.

I climb onto the bed on top of Lucy who is lying on her side. I lightly shift her onto her back as I straddle her waist. My lips descend down to her neck. I playfully kiss and suck on her collarbone up to her ear knowing how turned on it always makes Lucy.

"Luc, wake up." My teeth graze the skin faintly in a little nip to her sensitive flesh. "Lucy Goose, wakey wakey."

I smirk when I hear her moan in her sleep and feel her hips gyrating against my thigh. With an idea in mind I pull the blanket back from her body and slip my hand down her body to rest between her legs. I flick her clit a couple times then rub my hand around it in a circular motion knowing this should pull her from her slumber. Her back arches in her sleep and she moans softly.

I watch her face and listen to her breathless whimpers as she remains asleep. Deciding I need to take it a step farther to wake her I ease my pointer finger and middle finger into her to slowly thrust in and out of her while my thumb continues to rub her clit.

Lucy jolts awake abruptly completely at a loss for what is happening. A loud gasp breaks through her lips the second my fingers brush across her G-Spot.

"Ian," she whimpers in delight.

"Shhhh just enjoy the pleasure."

My fingers continue their delicious movements. Lucy's eyes are black with lust, they remain glued to mine the entire time. All it takes is a few more thrusts and circular rubs to her clit to send her over the edge. She cries out in pleasure writhing underneath me.

"Wha—what was that for?"

I capture her lips in mine for a sweet kiss.

"I was trying to wake you up so I figured I could try that because I knew it would work and you'd enjoy it. Come on, dinner is here."

It takes a couple minutes but I manage to get Lucy out of bed and downstairs—which she is only wearing one of my shirts and a pair of panties knowing how much I love her in my shirts. The three of us remain downstairs for a while watching TV until Brea's bedtime rolled around. After she was down for the night Lucy pulled me down the hallway into our bedroom for us to have our adult play time as Brea sleeps.

Lucy drags me to the foot of our tall bed. She pushes me down onto the mattress once she has stripped off my clothes. Lucy pulls the shirt off of her body and shimmies out of her panties. Climbing up the bed, she straddled my waist with a pleased smile on her lips. Lucy leans down to kiss me, her lips slowly dance across mine in an intimate kiss.

I lightly squeeze Lucy's hips when I feel her hand fisting my member between her hands. I groan into the kiss the moment Lucy's thumb runs across the tip of my member to swipe across the pre-cum collecting at the head. My member has grown rock hard in her hands, ready to pleasure her.

My eyes trail up and down Lucy's body when she sits up tall on top of me. Lucy rises up to her knees, grasps ahold of my penis, and then she slowly sinks down on my length.

"Ohhh god." Lucy throws her head back in pleasure.

I groan at the feeling of penetrating her hot, tight core. My hands reach up to grasp her hips in my hands. Lucy starts a slow motion of rotating her hips around in a circle before she starts rising and falling up and down on my length.

Our fingers lace together and rest on her hips as she moves them in every perfect way imaginable. I love when Lucy is on top; the sight of her writhing on top of me as she rides me is enough to bring me to my climax alone.

Lucy and I stay up until two in the morning making love to one another. I made sure to worship every single inch of her body and make up for the pain I caused her. When Brea cried out at three I got up to feed her to let Lucy sleep until morning.

Alright so you all know! Now am I back in your good graces? My long time readers all know I always make up for hard times with Ezria/Lucian with sex. For both your pleasure and theirs. Do you guys really think I would have Ian cheat on Lucy! Come one now. You should know me and my Lucian love by now. I would never have either cheat, nor would they get a divorce. I loved everyone's ideas and thoughts. I'm sorry for driving you guys crazy for the past week. Look on the bright side, at least I am doing every other day updates otherwise you would have had to wait weeks before finding out the truth.

As for the truth, I had given you the clues back in chapter 32. Many of you told me about reading the chapter over and over to dissect it only to fall short of realizing what it was. When they were in the kitchen Lucy wanted Ian to pleasure her prior to being cleared. Ian instantly retreated because he can't say no to her thus requiring him to instantly put some space between them. He knew she wasn't cleared and he didn't want to hurt her. The exact same thing here. They had sex, in his eyes when she was sore that meant he hurt her. He had to put space between them to prevent himself from giving into her desires. He knew if he brought it up she would brush it off as if she were fine. He also couldn't bring himself to have sex right away knowing he had caused her previous discomfort.

So know that you understand his reasoning you can see he has been the wonderful husband all along. So Hazan, here is your perfect Ian back!

I'm sorry to tell you Ari that your character did not get to make out with Ian like many thought she had. Hahaha.

Okay well now it's time for the next chapter!

If I am at 1,280 I will update on Friday. If it gets more than that, then it will be on Thursday.

I want to tell Ivana she is the first person to fully guess why Ian had been acting that way. Many of you were close but she figured it out a first.