Lord, help me. I think I actually failed a class.
"Hey, Al, c'mon, it's okay. I'm right here, alright? Nothing's gonna happen to me. I haven't done anything wrong, and neither have you, and neither has Arthur. We'll all be fine, okay? You know Gilbert wouldn't hurt me, right?"
For the past hour Alfred had recounted his dream, his worries, his mission, and his thoughts on Arthur while Matthew sat in front of him and listened quietly. The sun had already come into sight and people were beginning to bustle around town, while the drunks that had collapsed last night were beginning to stir awake and wander out, dazed.
"Mattie... can I ask you something?" Matthew tilted his head, but slowly nodded.
"Sure, Al, anything," he said, laying a comforting hand on his brother's arm.
"Did... did you- do you know that when Gilbert was watching over you he was instructed to do the same thing I'm doing now? I mean... he was supposed to do whatever it took to get you to talk." Alfred rubbed his eyes and gave a bitter laugh. "Every time I think about it I get more pissed off. You should have let me shoot him. He was using you, taking advantage of you, and you protected him. I mean, do you ever think he married you... out of guilt?"
Matthew slowly pulled his hand back and placed it on his lap, starting to fidget. Alfred opened his mouth to try to take it back, feeling an immense guilt take over as he saw the tender smile drop from Matthew's face, but he knew whatever he said, he couldn't erase the thought. It was a long while before he looked Alfred in the eyes again.
"I do- did. Lovino told me what he might have been doing when he first started watching me, and it was weighing on my mind for a long time, so I asked him for a divorce a year into our marriage."
"You... you never told me."
"I didn't want to worry you or turn you against him. Al, you need to stop being so protective. I can take care of myself now," Matthew said, clearly trying to derail Alfred's train of thought. Alfred almost took the bait and told his brother why he needed to be protected, but he shook that urge off and pursued the topic at hand.
"What happened? I mean, you two are still married, so something must have happened." Matthew sighed, noticing that Alfred had ignored his declaration.
"Do you remember when you were ambushed? I- I thought he would take it better than he did. It was a way out that wasn't his fault. It was an easy escape. I mean," he paused, wrinkling his brow as he directed a distant look downwards. "That's what it should have been. He wouldn't feel guilty, he would have done all he could to make up for what he did to me and I would have been the one to pull away. It... It didn't work out like that.
"He was confused, then he was angry, then frustrated, and then he was just... quiet. I told him I just didn't want to anymore. Next thing I know, I hear that you three were attacked, so I talked to him after you left.
"He told me everything; I told him I knew and he just... apologized. He kept apologizing, but he said he didn't want it to end. I didn't want it to, either. Not really. Al, I want you to understand that he's important to me, okay? I know you don't like him, I don't really know why, but I do," he said, raising his eyes to Alfred's.
Alfred regarded him for a moment. There was an intensity in his eyes that his timid nature didn't usually allow. He even met Alfred's gaze with a challenging one of his own. In the end, Alfred let out a defeated sigh, but sent his brother a small smile.
He didn't want to control Matthew, and he couldn't take things away from him simply because he didn't like them, even if that thing was an arrogant, tactless hunter like Gilbert. It could be worse. He could be the one that had married the man. Alfred grimaced at the thought of it, but shook his head clear of those thoughts.
"I want you to be happy, Mattie, and if he makes you happy, then you have my blessing. Just- tell him to stop describing your sex life. I can acknowledge you have one, I just don't want to think about it too much," he said, his face contorting in disgust.
Matthew laughed, and Alfred knew he shouldn't have brought it up. "What's wrong, Al? You jealous?"
He groaned, but couldn't help but to laugh, too.
"Mattie, I can a hundred percent say that I would rather die than be in your... position."
"Al, I can 'a hundred percent say' that you're dying to be in any position," Matthew countered with a mischievous smile.
His brother had been corrupted, Alfred thought briefly with a hint of horror, before acknowledging that his pride was under attack.
"What the hell's that supposed to mean?!" Alfred cried, slamming his hands on the table.
"It means you need it. Too bad you can't find anyone willing enough for it." Matthew laughed.
"Hey! I'm fucking hot, and I could have sex with anyone I wanted to. I have simply decided to wait," he stated matter-of-factly.
"Get real, Al! You're just a prude pretending to be a romantic because you don't know how to use what you've got," Matthew said, laughing harder at the indignation and reddening that showed on Alfred's face.
"And you only take it because you don't know how to give it!" Alfred yelled back, directing attention of several passerbys to them.
Alfred was almost completely sure that that was what made Matthew blush, not his actual comment, but it was still a victory in his eyes. Matthew was stiff under the attention, but still managed to respond in a harsh whisper.
"Then maybe you should be in my position, too!" It was Alfred's turn to laugh, this time.
"Just because you get knocked on your back easily doesn't mean I do, Mattie," he replied cheekily. Matthew huffed and crossed his arms, but didn't pursue the topic any further.
Alfred chuckled lightly, relieved at the playful, lighthearted air that their conversation had provided. He felt as if his problems had been washed away, even for an instant.
"What's he like?" Matthew asked, leaning forward.
"Arthur?" Matthew nodded in confirmation. "He's- pretty great. He knows his stuff and he's smart and funny. Oh! and he helped me get you this," Alfred said, pulling out a larger book from his bag and handing it to Matthew.
"A dictionary? Al, I hope you understand that my vocabulary is far broader than yours," he said, clearly unamused and maybe a little insulted as he turned it around in his hands.
"Just open it, Mattie," Alfred said, rolling his eyes.
"This-" Matthew quickly flipped back to the cover and peeled off the jacket that had been stuck onto it. He took in a sharp breath as his hands began to shake and he pulled them away. He looked up to Alfred with tears in his eyes.
"H-how? I mean, Al! These are expensive! I don't want you surviving off of bread while you're on this mission. Look, I'll pay you back and- why did you use a dictionary cover?"
Alfred, who was actually pretty proud about the disguise he had provided gave him a smug smile. "Don't worry about it Mattie, it was cheaper than I had expected and because the only other thing that I could pass it off as was a Bible and nobody would believe you had one of those."
Matthew nodded slowly, then laughed. "I'll place a glamour on it later so that it'll hold up even after the cover comes off. Thank you so much, Alfred, and tell Arthur I said thank you. Really, I- just... thank you." Alfred smiled at his brother, genuinely happy that he liked his gift and feeling a lot better than before.
"I should get going, Al, and you should probably try to get in a little more sleep before your date. You look pretty awful; not that you don't usually, but you look especially bad today," Matthew teased.
Alfred scoffed. "I'm the pretty one."
"We're twins, Al."
"Then you look like shit, too; I'm taking you down with me, Mattie."
"I do no-" Both boys turned quickly as a figure came rushing at them. Alfred got into a defensive position, but relaxed when he saw who it was.
"Fucking hell, Birdie, you scared the shit outta me! I woke up and you weren't in bed or in the restroom so I asked around, but nobody had seen you and- shit, don't scare me like that," Gilbert sighed in relief as he pulled Matthew to him.
His face was red from exertion, and he was breathing heavily; he must have run around everywhere trying to find Matthew, although Alfred didn't know how much danger he could have possibly been in out here. True, he was a magic user, but he'd been seen too many times with Organization uniform to be considered a threat by the citizens, and not like he'd ever used magic outdoors. He doubted anyone even knew there was a magic user in the Organization, and so close to the leader, too. No, it would have caused too much trouble for Ludwig. If anything, he was in more danger inside the large facility, where he walked a thin line, but he had Gilbert's protection, at least. Seeing him so panicked, so desperate, reassured Alfred slightly. At least he seemed to care.
Alfred saw Matthew stiffen and look to him as if searching for his approval. He gave him a small smile and looked away. This level of affection, relief, and vulnerability in Gilbert was not for his eyes, but he was glad he had seen it.
Gilbert loosened his hold on Matthew and turned to Alfred, finally seeing him. If he was shocked or embarrassed, he didn't show it. He nodded at him, but made no attempt to speak.
"I should probably go now, Mattie. I got a date later and I can't exactly go looking like this," Alfred repeated. Just as he turned to go, he paused, and turned back to Gilbert.
"Take care of my brother, Gil. I mean it. If anything happens to him while I'm away I will kill you-"
"Alfred!" Matthew reprimanded in exasperation as Alfred completely ignored their previous conversation.
"Don't worry, Al. If anything happens to him, you have every right to kill me. Hell, I'd kill me if it wouldn't make it so easy." Alfred raised a brow and looked the man up and down before nodding.
"You're my brother now, I'll try to trust you like one."
Gilbert stiffened, shocked to hear that after months of tension and near, and actual, fights. He recovered from his shock and nodded his agreement, sending Alfred a small smile as he did.
"It's good that you two are getting along, but I can protect myself," Matthew inserted, clearly a little offended at being deemed a damsel in distress.
Alfred laughed and walked away with a small wave.
Lukas was lounging on the couch reading with Arthur bustling around him. It was hardly even 9 in the morning, but there he was, frantically trying to figure out what to wear, whether he should eat breakfast, how he should greet Alfred when he came, and a long list of other things that he was very vocal about in his worries.
"Arthur, I assure you that if he found you appealing in what you normally wear, he won't mind whatever you choose," he said, flipping the page of his book.
Arthur stopped, leaning over the counter. "Was that meant to be an insult?" He called, eyes narrowing, but Lukas paid him no mind.
He shrugged. "It could be."
Arthur scoffed and continued running around trying to get himself ready. "Shouldn't you be out with Mathias, or whatever his name was? I thought you two had set up a date."
"Yes, well, I'm having second thoughts. I think I just won't show up. My brother is coming, after all," he said, examining his nails.
"That's rather harsh. If Vlad was right, and I'd hate to admit that I mildly hope he is, that man might be-"
"The love of my life? Please, Arthur, we're not children anymore," Lukas said, regarding him with his signature cold look, setting his book down on the coffee table.
Arthur huffed. "Fine, but you should at least give him a chance," he countered.
"Why? He doesn't even care for me as of now. Doesn't it seem a little odd to you to ask somebody out when you're not willing to try to lo- like them? Why should I even try to make him change his mind about me?" Lukas snarled.
Arthur was no one to tell him what to do, especially not when he would have a happy beginning, middle, and end. He would have a prince charming that would love him "truly and wholly" or whatever the fuck Vlad had said. Lukas had to put up with an asshole who had no interest in him, but who saw something he could gain from him.
He would have to let himself be used, and hold out, but for what?
"Because he'll help you and your brother. You heard Vlad. The ultimate outcome of your relationship with Mathias is a sense of completeness, and I know you'd never feel complete without him," Arthur replied softly.
Lukas's anger flickered as he considered it. Emil had been his whole life. He had raised him after their parents were killed. He had loved him and protected him up until recently when he had decided to go out into the world and had met someone and torn himself away from Lukas. He knew he should have seen it coming.
Emil was increasingly rebellious, not just about Lukas's authority over him, but over his apparent need to practice magic. The one that Lukas had placed within him at a young age to keep their identity alive. He had grown sick of it. He was sick of the insults, the rudeness, the harassment of the villagers at their knowledge of him being a magic user. Magic and witchcraft were one in the same in the eyes of the fearfully ignorant.
"H-how could he even help?" Lukas asked, quietly.
"You'll have to wait and see," Arthur said, deciding he had everything set, and going up to his room after sending Lukas a reassuring smile that he almost missed.
Lukas sighed, leaning back against the couch and placing the open book over his face.
He absolutely dreaded the thought of a date with Mathias, but he hated the cold looks and distance from his brother even more. He hated representing everything his brother wanted to throw away. He didn't know what Mathias could do to help, or if such an annoying person was even capable of helping anything.
He let out another annoyed sigh. Who even knew if Mathias was the person Vlad had been referring to? He could just be wasting his time and energy, and quite frankly, his patience; He was loud, overly loud, he decided, persistent, and had nothing to say that Lukas would want to hear. His appearance revealed at least that much. Why couldn't he at least get someone who practiced magic and knew the rudiments enough to not tell him he was going to hell.
That was it, he decided. He had no reason to subject himself to such an awful person.
Lukas sat up and pulled the book off his face, setting it down on the table. Just as he was about to pick up the phone to dial, it began to ring. He raised a brow, but answered, anyway.
"Hello?"
"Lukas! Oh, thank God. I thought I had the wrong number and some poor bastard would have to try to figure out who the hell Lukas was and who the hell I was. Listen, I know we said we'd go on a date, but I was wondering if you'd want to go out today, maybe in, like, two hours?" He said, hopefully.
Lukas scoffed in distaste at the man's false eagerness. He couldn't help but wonder what he wanted from him. He had asked him on a date for a reason, but clearly not a romantic one. Maybe he just wanted a hole to stick his dick into. (Quite frankly, he did seem the type, even for his religious alignment.)
"Lukas? You there?"
"Yes, sorry. Sure," he responded, automatically.
"Great! I'll meet you by the big tree in the center of the market. See you then!" Mathias said before hanging up.
He silently cursed to himself as he realized what he'd said. He set the phone down and groaned. He didn't want to get up. He didn't want to go; he felt tired all of a sudden.
Did he even have to? It was in the cards, and maybe he just wanted to push them further along, but what would happen if he didn't? If he told Mathias he'd changed his mind. Would he ever have to see him again?
The preparations for the solstice were important; he could use it as an excuse. He shook his head clear of any and all worries.
He was placing too much importance into the hands of one man. Mathias was insignificant, if only to help him with whatever that "completeness" Vlad was talking about was. He would gladly give Mathias whatever the hell he wanted in exchange for it, he thought. Besides, he wasn't the end goal.
Lukas agreed upon it within himself: If Mathias wanted someone who was nice to look at to keep around him, fine; If he wanted someone simply because of the taboo of magic, fine; hell, he would gladly even take the place of just someone to fuck. After all, when it was said and done, he was certain he wouldn't have to see him again.
He stood and headed to his room to get ready.
He'd be all three if he had to be.
Lukas left for his date first, but not without more second thoughts. He dressed casually and took his time getting there, stopping to look at things he might need to purchase for the solstice, and even picking up a few so that it wouldn't seem like he went out of his way to meet with Mathias.
When he had finally gotten to the large tree, he had purchased candles, quartzes, and oils, all of which focused on renewal, and was about 10 minutes late. A small part of him had hoped that Mathias had figured he wouldn't show and had just gone home, but when he arrived, Mathias was leaning against the large trunk, not looking in the least bit annoyed when he finally saw him. In fact, he looked delighted (probably because he had shown up at all).
"Lukas! Hey, I figured you might have gotten a little backed up. What's all that stuff?" He said, regarding his bag curiously.
"For the solstice," he replied disinterestedly.
"Oh, that's cool. You practice magic? I have a friend whose brother practices magic, but he doesn't do all that solstice stuff. I'm sure he'd like it if he ever had the chance. He's a pretty chill kid, but his husband's not really about it. Anyway, do, like, all of you guys do that solstice stuff, or just some of you, or, like, what's the deal with that?" He said.
All at once.
Not even stopping for breath.
Lukas blinked his shock away and restored his careless demeanor. "I think it's rather stupid for someone to marry a person who doesn't accept your culture. If his husband wasn't interested in magic, he could have found plenty of others who wouldn't mind. And to answer your question: Yes, I do, and the solstice is ceremonial and signifies a renewal, as well as a prayer to the gods to grant you good fortune. It's best to make the offering, as it grants stability in power. They are the ones who provide it, after all, but not all magic users celebrate specifically on the solstice" he said, watching a small bird hopping about in the distance. His brother liked birds, he recalled in the back of his mind.
"Where do you plan to go?" He said, turning back to Mathias, who was watching him in wonder.
"I-I- uh... let's just walk and talk?" Lukas nodded. "I can carry your bag for you, if you-"
"I assure you, I do not require the same dainty treatment as a woman," he spit back, glaring at Mathias.
Of course, the point was a bit moot, as he had to look up at him and acknowledge that the man probably had a head on him, and quite a few inches in terms of shoulder width. A sharp contrast to his own form, which did look rather feminine when compared.
He would've admired the view a little more if he knew he wouldn't be caught and take a closer look at what Vlad had regarded as his athleticism, but there wasn't a chance Mathias wouldn't notice him staring. Besides, he didn't particularly feel like walking into anything in his distraction and making himself look like a love-struck fool.
Mathias only laughed and gave him a playful look. "I'm sure you don't. You look like you could probably kick my ass with a wave of your hand, without so much as batting an eye, but would you really want to turn down a free pack mule?" He seemed to ask a little hopefully.
Lukas couldn't help the small laugh that escaped as he passed Mathias his bag.
"Anyway, I get where you're coming from with the whole acceptance thing, but I'd like to think that the guy's maybe trying to keep the kid safe. I mean, it's not an easy world for magic users anymore. Heard that a group of them were burned alive just a few villages down.
"Kind of stupid, I mean, not like they don't got kids to lose. Hell, weren't they worse off? I mean, ya can't baptize a magic user. I've seen someone try– it didn't go well– and they're always the targets" he said, distantly.
Lukas couldn't say that he wasn't impressed by Mathias's understanding, and even his defense of magic users, but he didn't let his previous sentiments be swayed too easily. Anyone could lie, anyone could do their research. If anything, Mathias had asked if Lukas practiced magic to know where he should stand on the topic.
"It's rather odd that you know that much. Most don't pay it any mind unless it directly concerns them, and judging from that cross around your neck, it in no part should concern you."
Mathias gave a nervous laugh and rubbed the back of his neck with his free hand. "Well, see, kid I was telling you about had his parents killed by a witch-"
"A Christian witch," Lukas clarified.
"Yeah, uh, and so he was taken in by a family that tried to make sure he wouldn't be in danger again, so they tried to baptize him, but, you know, no go. Ended up sick to the point where they thought he was gonna croak. Took all that nonsense away from him and it was like he started breathing again.
"'Course, it's kinda shitty that they kept him in an environment different than the one he belonged in, but maybe they thought they could purify him, or something," Mathias shrugged.
Lukas gave a small nod. "How do your gods do it, by the way? I mean, there must be thousands of followers. Having to grant each one with powers? Sounds like a pain in the ass."
Lukas regarded Mathias with a small smirk, "What? Your God can't?" He asked in a voice that was almost teasing.
"Probably just not the kind. A little selfish, a little jealous. Also, I haven't totally been the... purest christian" Mathias said with a wink.
"There are different gods and different followings. It wouldn't be the same ones for each faction. The different gods focus on different areas within a single group, as well. Besides, they're gods. They're infinite." Lukas brushed the implication off, noticing his surroundings again. Nobody seemed to be paying him much mind, like they usually did.
No one was pulling their kids behind them as he walked by, or sending him dirty looks. They weren't yelling the same awful things at him that he had grown accustomed to, and he couldn't help but wonder if that was because of Mathias.
Surely they couldn't have been able to pick up on the fact that Mathias had the same religious alignment, he thought, looking back up at the man, who was talking about something Lukas didn't pay much attention to.
He didn't wave at anybody, and there wasn't even a hint of him knowing anybody.
Maybe it was fear, he thought. He was a man of a rather imposing stature. If he was seen with him they could even be considered friends: A threat to him might be considered a slight against Mathias.
Mathias looked at him expectantly before he realized he wasn't listening. He stopped talking and smirked at him.
Shit, he'd been staring.
"Like what you see, dove?" He said with another wink.
"No, I was wondering how someone with such a swollen head could say nothing but stupid things. Is there only air in there?" he asked coolly, before turning away and speeding up.
He felt his heart flip at the name, but didn't let himself show it. He was a little curious as to why Mathias had chosen dove. He seemed more the 'babe' kind of guy, which would have made it easier for Lukas to hate him even more, but this one seemed rather... mild. Nothing he could really be angry about. On the contrary, it was kind of- no.
It was rude for him to have called him by anything other than his name when they had only known each other a few minutes, maybe an hour, total. He noticed he had slowed down and Mathias was almost at his side, as if he'd let him catch up.
He couldn't very well start speeding up again, it would look ridiculous. He just sincerely hoped Mathias couldn't see through his response. Quite frankly, he had no idea what the man had been saying or if what he said had even fit with the given topic.
Mathias laughed good naturedly, raising his hands in surrender as he reached his side. "I didn't mean to offend, I was just wondering why you would be wearing a cross. It just doesn't seem like something that would go with your religion."
Lukas instinctively raised a hand to his hair clip at the mention of it. So Mathias hadn't noticed his distraction, and now he knew what he was talking about. Two birds, he supposed.
"My brother gave it to me. 'A protection charm' he said. I suppose he was worried; wanted people to think I wasn't a witch. He went off on me when he had seen I had worn it upside down. It's a sign of the Antichrist, was it? I just preferred it on this side," he said with a shrug.
Mathias stared at him for a moment before he laughed. A full, heartfelt laugh that made Lukas's heart soar for an instant. His smile wasn't mischievous, or playful, or flirtatious then. It was just, joyful, genuine.
"You really are something, you know that, dove?" He asked, smiling down at Lukas, who blushed a bit, but didn't turn away.
"It symbolizes the rejection of the Christ, yeah," he said with a soft chuckle. "You have a brother? Older or younger?"
Lukas stood a little straighter at the question. He almost felt like a chess piece. "Younger, his name's Emil."
Mathias hummed. "What's he like?"
Lukas opened his mouth to describe him but couldn't find the words to. To him, his brother was everything. He was his most important person and he couldn't find words to express his adoration or to describe why he loved him, either. It was a feeling, and only that. He thought about it for a moment, trying to find words that came close, aware of Mathias's eyes on him.
"Would you like to meet him?" He finally said.
Mathias seemed to draw back at the question, but he quickly regained himself and nodded eagerly. "Y-yeah! I-I mean, sure. Of course."
Lukas gave a final nod. "Good, I was supposed to meet him in the plaza."
Chriiiiist, I hate typing this on my phone, but my dog killed my laptop charger and I haven't had the time or money to replace it OAO. I just went to see how the published chapters looked and I dunno what possessed my phone to clump all the bold together and all the italics together, but I fixed it. Also, I forgot to change eclectic witch to Hereditary witch, but that's done~. I should go check on the updated versions to see what's up, but... I'm lazy right now, I'll check in a bit. Also, this Matthew vs. Mathias business is throwing me off so much. I'm gonna fuck up and y'all are gonna end up reading about Matthew fucking Lukas by mistake and it's gonna be funny and confusing.
Also, I don't know how to squeeze 'Nor' in there as a pet name, so y'all are gonna have to settle for 'dove' because I like it and doesn't have the condescending air of "sweetheart" or the overly tender "honey," "love," and all that other nonsense that my brain refuses to come up with XD.
Side notes:
The upside down cross thing is also kind of a shout out to St. Peter who didn't think he was worthy of being crucified in the same way as Jesus so they flipped the cross upside down. It's considered a sign of humility before Christ, but I won't totally reject this as a sign of disrespect against him as it's considered in popular culture.
I mean, people don't wear it in that fashion with St. Peter in mind or any knowledge of St. Peter, ya know? They wear it upside down with the idea of rejecting the sacrifice and that God and kind of mocking them, too. Kind of "you're not my God." It depends on the person and it has a more "not my god" meaning when given to Lukas, especially to the people.
Reviews:
abcm(guest):
It wasn't belated at all, it was actually early in the morning on the day! THANK YOU SO MUCH! IT MADE ME REALLY HAPPY!
Guest:
That's so nice, thank you! It was actually a pretty normal school day, BUT YOUR REVIEW MADE IT WAY BETTER!
Guest:
Oh, geez, sorry! I just mentioned Christmas to kind of give you guys an idea on what it was like, I didn't mean for any misconceptions. I kinda talked about that later on :D? The extra info was really cool, though OAO! I'm kind of lazy, so I usually just do an overall thing, so the in depth was really neat :0! Especially from someone who practices! My mom and sister practice, too :D! Sorta.. I mean, they dabble, so did my grandma, but nobody worships anything around here XD.
Luckei:
Thank you so much! I just hope I can keep the flow going XD!
That's as good as this chapter is getting, I've been editing it for the longest time, and I'm so sorry.