Chapter 24:
Michonne had thought about the decision she was about to make for hours on end. She had thought about all possible consequences, and she knew that only a small amount of good would come from her next move, but she was hoping that it would pay off in the long run.
A cold breeze ran through the safe zone, as it was in the early hours of the morning. Rick had left her for the night; after returning from his task of warning the others of what Tobin saw, the two of them spent the rest of their time together in her bed. She loved to lay beside him, listening to him talk about any and everything, and she also loved to lay beneath him when they were done with words.
It was because she had only just been with him that night, that guilt brewed in her stomach for what she was about to do, but she wouldn't be able to just continue on with the days otherwise.
She descended the steps to the basement that housed Negan, encountering Bruce, who wore a frown from the minute he saw her.
"Nobody's allowed down here", The man announced, looking her from head to toe.
She nodded, "I know, but Rick was meant to come and check on him but he had an emergency at home, so he sent me instead"
It was a risky lie, but Michonne knew that the man was not one of Rick's closest confidants, so she imagined he wasn't up to date with everything that had happened with Negan.
Bruce looked unsure, beginning to shake his head, "I don't know about that. He's said time and time again, no one's allowed down here, and I'm not trying get my ass in trouble-"
"...Would you rather I went and got Rick?", It was a bluff that she hoped he wouldn't call.
He seemed to mull over that other option, and quickly came to a decision, "Go on"
"Thanks", She stepped past him and into the home. The lights flickered on, and she left the door ajar as she approached the cell door.
Negan groaned, rolling over on his mattress, "What the fuck-"
He squinted at her, trying to get his eyes to focus as she planted herself at the entrance. She wasn't sure what she felt seeing him, but it wasn't anything good.
A light chuckle left him as he laid on his back, staring up at the ceiling, "Well ain't this something?"
She didn't speak just yet, instead she was trying read his reaction, and subsequently, his mood.
"I wasn't expecting to see you anytime soon. Not after that speech your fucking cowboy gave me. Does he know you're down here?", He glanced at her, then shook his head, "Nah. I doubt that. I highly doubt that. As much as I can't stand that little prick, I'm sure he'd kick up one hell of a fuss if he knew you were down here"
The man loved to hear himself talk, and she was sure it was probably the most he had said in a few days. She gathered herself as she slowly inhaled, "...I wanted to thank you, for everything before… this"
He turned his head to look at her.
"You didn't have to do the things you did, but you did. I think about that person that you were back then, a lot. I've seen glimmers of that person here and there… and I think that side of you isn't completely gone, just buried under piles and piles of shit…", She huffed, her eyes meeting his, "I think being in here… not having to make lifesaving decisions, not having to fight for people you care about and having time to reflect, will give that side of you a chance to show itself again"
He sat up, turning to face her with his legs stretched out in front of him.
"For as long as you are the way you are, I won't be able to be happy, because I'll feel like I need to protect you, but it gets harder and harder to stand by someone who only cares about himself-"
"I care. I fucking care", He spat back, "You claimed you care but you've fucking cut my hand off, you've knocked me out-"
"To stop you!", She hissed, stepping closer to the gate, "The other Saviors aren't your enemy. Rick, is not your enemy. I am not your enemy. You are, and you will continue to be your own worst enemy for as long as you believe that you can survive in this world by stealing and killing-"
"That's the only way we survive in this world 'Chonne! Wake the fuck up and take the daisies out that tight ass of yours-"
"No, because it's that kind of attitude that puts you and everyone around you in danger. If everyone else adopts that kind of attitude then it sets the tone for what's to come, and we cannot start life again with that kind of mentality because then there will be none", She fumed, staring at him with angry eyes, "There's a chance for us to rebuild something here, so I will not let you ruin that for anybody else, and I will not hesitate to kill you if you try"
To anybody else, it would have seemed that the man was unfazed by her threat, but it was little subtleties in his body language that told her different, "You'll kill me?"
"I will", She affirmed, her tone stern.
He smirked, reviving his arrogant attitude, "Oh 'Chonne. That's cute. You and your piss stain boyfriend are a match made in heaven then, huh? Fighting to save the world together. Real fucking cute."
She ignored him, "I won't be coming back down here, but I will if I have to"
"Oh, I bet you fucking will", He mocked, "And I'll be right here waiting for you"
She spun on her heel to leave, glad to have finally gotten her thoughts off her chest.
"Hey!", He called, causing her to stop. She backed up, watching him quickly retrieve something from beneath his mattress, then make his was over to the door. He held out the picture she had given him of the two of them, "Take it"
She didn't unfold her arms, instead she just stared up at him with narrowed eyes.
"This is probably the closest you'll get to that man you knew", His gaze travelled to her neck for only a second, "...I'll take it back if he resurfaces"
Her gaze dropped back to the Polaroid, and she snatched it from his hand before leaving without another word.
The next day she was up early, and ready for her trip with Carl and Daryl. She was looking forward to returning to the Sanctuary, and seeing Dwight, as well as having the company of Carl and Daryl.
She left her home with small backpack and her katana in hand, and made her way to the Grimes residence like they had planned. While Rick had given her an open invitation to his home, she hadn't yet used it, which was mainly due to his children, for two very different reasons.
Once on their porch, she knocked on the door and stepped back, listening as heavy footsteps moved around the home.
Daryl appeared, swinging open the door, "Come on in, we're just finishing up"
"Alright", She strolled in, closing the door behind her. As soon as she heard the faint sound of a child's laughter she stopped, knowing the youngest member of the family was nearby, "I'll wait here"
"Alright", Daryl didn't bother looking back, instead he walked further down the hall and turned into another room.
Michonne took the opportunity to look around the home from her spot by the door, noticing only a slight difference in the decor from her own home. She heard footsteps trudging down the stairs, and she looked up to see Rick, holding his daughter in his hands. She flashed him a quick smile, "Hey"
"You okay?", He asked, strolling over to her with the girl on his hip.
She nodded hurriedly, her pitch higher than usual, "Yeah. Fine"
"You sure about that?"
Her eyes sailed from his, to the smaller brow set that watched her closely, "Yeah. Fine"
Judith raised her hand and waved at Michonne, speaking behind her pacifier, "Hi"
Michonne's eyes widened, "Oh, hey there, tiny person"
Rick chuckled at her, "Tiny person?"
"Well she is", She tore her gaze away from Judith, "She's tiny… and a person"
"That's true", He peered over his shoulder for a moment, then closer the space between them, giving her a soft kiss on the lips.
She pulled back in horror, hissing at him, "We are not alone!"
He frowned at her, "I know, that's why I checked-"
"Judith is right there!", It felt strange saying his daughter's name, but she didn't have time to think about it.
Rick squinted at her, "Do you think she'll tell Carl? Because chances of that happening are slim, she only knows how to say 'Hi' and 'Bye', so…"
She tried to bite back a smile, but failed, "You know exactly what I mean"
"I do", He grinned, sneaking her another quick kiss, timing it just right, as they soon heard footsteps echoing from deeper in the home.
"Let's get this show on the road", Daryl announced, stomping through the home, "Carl!"
"I'm here", The teen replied, skipping down for states, "And I'm ready"
Daryl was the first out the home, and Michonne stood out on the porch while Rick spoke to his son.
"Make sure you-", He began, shifting Judith from one hip to another.
"Listen. I know", Carl finished flatly.
"And don't-"
"Wonder off. I know"
Rick stared at him, "Good. Be careful"
"I will, bye!", Carl started for the steps.
Michonne giggled as Rick shook his head in despair, "Nice pep talk"
"He shouldn't be a problem", He assured, watching his son for a few moments, before looking back at her, "You think you'll be back tonight?"
"Hopefully", She answered truthfully.
He nodded, his gaze wandering away from her for a moment, "Alright…"
"You might just get an early night tonight", She teased, backing away from him.
"...Maybe I don't want one?"
Her stomach fluttered from his words, but the feeling didn't last long, as she quickly confessed, "I saw Negan last night"
It was if someone had sucked the good mood right out of him, as his expression immediately darkened, "What?"
"I went and saw Negan, after you left", She repeated with less conviction, "I spoke to him"
Rick's gaze sailed past her as he slowly nodded, exposing his clenched jaw, "You went and saw him, after everythan' I said-"
"I'm sorry, but I had-... I needed to, and I want us to talk about this when I get back"
His eyes locked back on hers.
"Please?", She pleaded softly.
He took a moment, as if he were thinking over her request, before agreeing, "We will"
"Okay", She spun on her heel and skipped down the steps, hoping he wouldn't dwell on the news while they were gone.
She had imagined that the news would anger him, and she would prefer it did, rather than hurt him. She was being honest when she agreed to the terms of their relationship, but she had to cut ties with Negan her way, and she planned to explain that to Rick.
Her travels with Carl and Daryl began, and they set off in one of the many cars the community kept. She was secretly hoping to use the trip as an excuse to get to know Daryl better, since the man was so tight lipped, and didn't attempt to stray into conversation.
"If you could eat one thing again, what would it be?"
Michonne frowned at the windshield as she thought, before peering into the backseat to see Carl, "Soya milk"
The teen looked horrified, "Soya milk? That's what you'd have again?"
She nodded, "Yep. It's great"
Daryl glanced at her from the driver's seat, "That's that milk made out of some kind ah' beans, right?"
"That's the one"
The man snorted, "Fuck that"
"Have either of you even tried it before?", Carl and Daryl shook their heads, their top lips curling in disgust, leading Michonne to roll her eyes, "Alright fine, what would you pick?"
"A burger", Carl grinned, "And curly fries"
Daryl pursed his lips for a moment, "Some damn ribs"
She sighed, shaking her head at both of them, "Should have known"
"What made you want to stop eating meat?", Carl queried, tilting his head as he looked at her strangely, "Have you always been like that?"
"Yeah. I was all for saving the animals", She sighed, "I had a lot of pets as a kid, too"
"But people didn't eat pets…"
"What you'd consider as a pet and what someone else considers as food, are two very different things. Some cultures wouldn't dare to eat the animals that most others ate. Where you would have drawn the line on what meat you ate before was all relative, but I bet you're not as picky now?"
Carl peered out her from beneath his hair, "We ate dogs, once"
She glanced back at him, "See? And I bet you wouldn't have dreamt of a thing before all this?"
"Never"
"So you're happy as shit eating your leaves then?", Daryl quipped, wearing a crooked smile.
She side eyed him, "Leaves?"
"That's what it is ain't it?"
She opened her mouth to refute his claim, when she noticed something strange in the field they passed, "Did you see that?"
"What?"
"That walker", She turned in her seat to look out the back window, "Just standing there"
"..It's just a walker?", Carl shrugged.
"They don't stand still when they see something. Even if their legs can't move their arms will", She squinted, trying to see where three strange figure went.
Daryl looked through the rear-view, "Rick told me about what happened with Tobin"
"We don't think it's walkers at all. We think they're people using their skin as camouflage, so they could hide with other walkers"
"Really?", Carl's eyebrows sprung up, "From that other group?"
"We think so. It makes sense, I mean, it's gross but it would work"
"It would", Daryl rasped, nibbling on his thumb nail, "Just keep your eyes peeled"
Michonne felt uneasy, to say the least. Knowing there was possibly a hostile group watching there everyone put her on high alert, especially with Carl present. She had many reasons for protecting the teen, and she didn't want to bring the boy back to his father in a state after their first outing.
When they arrived at the dilapidated mall that Michonne had wanted to visit, they parked as close to the entrance as they could, which meant they attracted the attentions of many corpses.
Michonne and Daryl got out first, impaling the walker's closest to them to make room for Carl. The teen soon helped them, using his knife as he fought beside Michonne. She did her best to stay vigilant, looking at every walker she killed carefully, but an uneasy feeling was growing in her stomach, which only drove her resolution to protect Carl, and return him to his father unharmed.
Once they cleared the entrance, the trio used a broken window to enter, and much to Michonne's annoyance, almost every store was cleared out, all but a toy store. She helped Carl fill a little pink carry case with items for his sister, while Daryl waited outside.
"I don't even think she'll play with these"
Michonne glanced at Carl as she removed a toy from its box, "She probably will. It's all bright colours and noisy… kids love that"
The teenager stared at her for a moment, "Where you a nurse… or something?"
She furrowed her brows at him, "No… not a nurse"
Carl continued to stare at her, "...Did you have kids?"
She knew he'd eventually ask, but that didn't make her feel better about answering, "I had one child"
His eyes widened, "Really?...Why didn't you tell me?"
Her brows furrowed once again, "I didn't think that was something I needed to tell you?"
"I told you about my mom", He countered softly.
Michonne stopped what she was doing, sensing he was genuinely shocked by her revelation, "It's not something I rush to talk about with anyone, Carl"
He gave her a slow, understanding nod, but still seemed taken aback.
She inhaled slowly, "I promise, we'll talk about it. When we reach the Sanctuary… okay?"
His eyes lit up only a fraction, but he nodded again, with more enthusiasm. She secretly found it funny that the young boy had managed to worm his way into her heart with barely any effort. She found his boyish charm sweet, and while she wouldn't admit it to him, he held the same good traits of his father. It was as if she had inadvertently adopted them both as her own, which she didn't mind at all.
They left the mall shortly after collecting items for Judith's entertainment, and Michonne almost breathed a sigh of relief when they were back on the road, but she soon learned that she had no reason to.
Only a mile away from the mall where they met with a line of, what appeared to be walkers, stood in the road. Upon closer inspection, she learned that that wasn't the case at all. The all held weapons, and didn't attempt to break the human chain they had created.
"What do we do?", Carl asked from the back seat.
"Get down", Michonne instructed, not taking her eyes off the threat.
"I can floor it", Daryl muttered to Michonne, "Try to drive right through 'em-"
Michonne almost jumped when the bullet shot through the windshield, and she yelled to Daryl, "Go!"
He did as he was told, slamming his foot down on the pedal and speeding down the street. The strangers in the street jumped out the way as the past, still shooting at the car.
Michonne sank down in her seat and looked in the back of the vehicle, "Carl stay down-"
Her blood ran cold when she caught sight of the teenager, slumped across the seats, with a blood pouring from where his eye used to be.