Theme 25: Trouble Lurking
Kagome heaved herself though the well as the swirling colours began to die down. To her dismay, Inuyasha had not come to meet her. She sighed heavily and tucked a piece of hair behind her ears.
It was still light out now, but soon it would get dark. Biting her lip in worry she made her way back to the village.
She found Sango waving her boomerang outside while Miroku kept watch in conversation with Shippo on his shoulder; Inuyasha was nowhere to be seen. She waved "Hey guys!"
They looked up "Lady Kagome, you've returned" Miroku smiled as Shippo leaped into her arms "Kagome, I'm so glad your back!"
"Me too" Kagome smiled.
Sango stood "I'm pleased to see your arms have healed considerably" she said.
"Yeah" Kagome waved them a little "The doctor says to keep the bandage on for some time, and my leg only needs a little rest, but not as much as before, I think I can walk more on my own now"
"Inuyasha will be pleased" Miroku said.
As the topic of conversation switched, Kagome adopted a less cheery voice "How is He?"
Miroku followed in kind "Not himself as usual" he answered "I worry for him, the night of the hidden moon is tonight, but he has not made any of his usual preparations, I fear he does not know and yet will not allow me to advise him. I have not been able to find him all day"
Kagome closed her eyes for a moment. As this new Inuyasha had a habit of going off on his own without telling anyone and did not go to any of his usual places, Kagome had placed one of the shards on him so she could sense him when he was gone.
She found him quite a bit away; the shard wasn't moving so she suspected him either asleep or just still. "Found him" she said.
"Kagome, are you sure you want to deal with this yourself?" Sango asked gently "If you wish, Miroku could be with him instead?"
Kagome shook her head "No, I...I need to do this myself. Besides, maybe this might help him, stir up some memories, and the old Inuyasha never liked too many people round when he was weak, I think this Inuyasha will be the same."
"It's kina weird how we keep calling him 'this Inuyasha' and the present Inuyasha'" Shippo piped "Its still Inuyasha isn't it?"
Kagome didn't know how to answer him.
X-X-xx-xx-xx-xx-xx-xx-XX
Sesshomaru was deep in Inuyasha's memories, for the first time, voluntarily. The more he learned about the dynamics between his Half-brother and the Miko Kagome, the less he understood. Inuyasha's memories were a swirl of contradictions, memories buried so deeply he could barely sort through them. But as he lowed himself to be consumed, they came to him.
He was Inuyasha, 50 years ago. In the heat of a battle, but it was not a battle for protection or even strength, his blood burned with the desire to protect. The village around him burned as dozens of fire Youkai ran amok, but he ignored him, he had to get to her.
Kikyo. She stood in the centre of the fray, firing her scared arrows and destroying her enemy. Kikyo, the priestess of the scared jewel, her eyes were steady and calm.
He couldn't let her die.
She strung an arrow, but as she was about to fire, a Youkai charged at her and she was distracted, and she misfired, into the eye of her younger sister Kaede. Her calm broke and she cried out in anguish, dropping her bow ad running to her fallen sister.
Youkai charged, sensing weakness, but Inuyasha was there. He sliced them apart before they even had time to register his existence.
She cradled her sister, weeping.
Later, after the battle was over and Kaede was getting medical treatment, Inuyasha found her by the river, in deep contemplation. He approached her and sat by her side.
Her face was unreadable as the day he met her, when he tried to take the jewel and she defeated him. Instead of killing him, she looked at him with those unreadable eyes and left, sparing him.
He tried to search for the right words to say, how could he convey the depth of his fear, his sorrow and his desperation when she was concerned, when he realised she could be hurt? How could he comfort her at a time like this? Instead he asked "How's your…uh…sisters eye?"
His brusque words were met with an answer "I've done a terrible thing to her. I'm entirely the one to blame"
Inuyasha listened, it wasn't often Kikyo spilled to contents of her heart to anyone, but she tended to do it more to Inuyasha than others. He still did not know her reasoning, instead, as always; he listened, "If only I hadn't been so careless"
He turned his head "Come on, don't blame yourself too much" he said "Things like this are bound to happen when you're fighting all the time"
Kikyo was still so young herself. She was so mature and strong that sometimes people forgot that she was still only fifteen.
A child by human years and a baby by his, and yet at the tender age of seven, she'd been thrust into a world where she did not belong to herself alone, one where her every action could mean the life or death of another. Sometimes, when Inuyasha watched her, staring off into the distance, he was reminded of how small she really was and he felt it really wasn't fair.
She really didn't deserve this.
She looked at him "Inuyasha. Are you unable to be yourself unless you are fighting?"
His eyes flicked back to her "You asked me something like that before?"
"Wouldn't you like to stop fighting?"
He turned to her "Huh? What do you mean?"
"Stop fighting all the time, stop and become human?"
"Me? Become a human?" why would she suggest something like that?
"It's possible. It's true you are half Youkai, but you are also half human. If the Shikon feel into the hands of a Youkai, they would definitely become stronger. However, if it was used to turn you into a human the jewel would be purified and it may even cease to exist."
He thought about it. She was right, it was possible. But then, that would be giving up his dream, his lifelong goal. To become a full Youkai, wasn't this what he had vowed to himself as he was a child being chased down, constantly running for his life just because he wasn't normal? And also, he would have no more reason to come here. Somehow the thought was painful. His heart was so full of emotion he couldn't understand it.
"And then what?" he asked "What would happen to you?"
"My duty is to protect the jewel" she said "Without it, I could live the life of an ordinary woman.
He was waiting in a tree, impatient as ever, his ears twitched in the wind.
Why was he here, why was he waiting? He had better things to be doing, like getting the sacred jewel, that was the whole reason his was in this backwater village in the first place and not out getting stronger. The plan had been to kill the priestess holding it and to make his wish. Simple.
Only, it wasn't so simple.
Inuyasha's heart was like stone. It was a block that couldn't be moved. Years of pain and betrayal had made him this way from the moment his precious human mother took her last breath and could no longer protect him. Now he protected himself, he learned very quickly that no one, no one cared for Hanyou. He was alone and the only person who he himself should care for was himself.
And yet…
"Inuyasha?"
He looked down and saw her. The priestess of the jewel of the Four Souls. Kikyo.
She was dresses in her Miko garb, her hair swirled around her as the wind blew, and cherry blossoms completed the picture. Inuyasha's stone heart skipped a beat. He looked away.
"Inuyasha?" she called again "I know it's you, come down here."
He stood and leapt down with inhuman grace. In her arms was her bow, she'd been out exterminating Youkai in a nearby village. Inuyasha's heart tugged at the thought of her in danger, and then he put away those feeling behind that block. No, he could not give in.
Kikyo looked at him with the sad eyes, but they were so kind, "Were you waiting for me?"
"Keh" he spat. Yes, but she would not, could not know that.
"I'm returning to the village" she said, "Will you accompany me?"
How could she be so lax? He was a Hanyou, wasn't she scared, wasn't she disgusted? Every time they fought, she always won and she always let him live. That had been the first thing that caused him to take notice of her. Miko weren't supposed to let Hanyou live. But she did, the priestess Kikyo.
She had a bleeding heart that wanted to believe in everything to their last moment, even him.
He grunted and got on the boat, tethered nearby.
As sat down and they continued their journey in silence as he rowed it upstream.
He struggled not to look back at her, to contain the way his heart trembled, he felt so pathetic, she couldn't possible return this feeling, so why have it in the first place?
"Inuyasha" she called "You haven't been around lately, I was worried"
Worried? For him? "Keh, aren't you grateful I wasn't around to try to take the jewel again?" he spat.
"I enjoy your company Inuyasha" she said "And I miss you when you're not here" and then said nothing more, leaving him in confusion. What did she mean?
They reached their destination and tethered the boat. He stood and Kikyo rose the get up, but as she was leaving the boat she tripped and fell against him.
They gasped as they both felt a rush of something inexplicable. She looked up at him, big brown eyes usually so guarded for a moment he saw a chink in her armour, her eyes yearning for something, something deeper, something so similar to what he felt, that his wall fell and he was rushed with emotions so new yet powerful he dropped the row staff in his arms and embraced her tightly.
It wasn't enough. Kikyo was such a powerful Miko, many Youkai had been felled by her strong reiki, yet in his arms she was just a small woman who he felt needed to be protected too. He wanted to protect her. He wanted to wrap her up in his arms so nothing could ever harm her.
Suddenly, his mind caught up with his actions and he prepared to pull away when she reached up and returned the embrace, her head resting beneath his chin. Her heart was pounding too, in time with his.
And he made his decision "Kikyo. Kikyo I will become a human. I swear I'm not just saying this, I will become a human" he was going to be by her side forever, he wanted nothing more. Even if he was weak, even if he was hated, as long as this woman would open her heart to him as she has opened his, he could accept anything.
"Inuyasha" she sighed.
"So you can become a normal human too, and be my…"
"Enough" she said softly "Stop that's all I need to hear"
But he wanted to convey it to her "Kikyo, I truly am in lo…" but she reached up and kissed him, and then, nothing else mattered. Their hearts were connected. He had what was more precious than any power, he had her.
The scene changed, it was 50 years later and Kikyo was different, she was an animated body made from bones and dirt. And yet to Inuyasha, she was still his Kikyo, she had not changed, she still had his heart.
As she waited for her soul collectors to fill her with human souls, he listened as she told him how Naraku's human side still longed for her and his stomach filled with bile and jealousy.
She looked at him; her once sad yet gentle eyes were now cold and harsh.
"I don't care how you feel about me now!" he approached her "But I swear I won't let Naraku have you either!" he grabbed her arms and snarled "Only I can protect you from him!" he embraced her.
Even as she struggled and cried "Let me go" he held tighter, trying to recreate the time when their hearts had once been one, trying to each that part of his heart that he'd given to her so long ago, that he knew she still possessed.
Suddenly she stopped struggling, and returned the embrace and he felt it, their hearts as one.
"I will slay Naraku myself, so you won't have to fight anymore. I will protect you."
"Inuyasha" she sighed and for a moment, he had his Kikyo back again "Kikyo" he murmured.
The moment passed and he felt her pressed a knife to his neck. "Kikyo" he gasped. She laughed cruelly "Another example of how men are pathetic fools. You have this belief that once you embrace a woman, she belongs to you."
No that wasn't it! "Listen" he tried to explain, but she pressed the knife closer "Don't move. I've learned something from you just now. As long as the heart of the weak and pathetic Onigumo beats within Naraku, there will be an opportunity for me and that will give me the chance I need to totally destroy Naraku"
Inuyasha's eyes winced in pain "Kikyo" he gasped. Why, where was his Kikyo with the bleeding heart, the one who had been willing to give him and Hanyou a chance, how wanted to believe even in a heartless thief. His kind, gentle and completely misunderstood Kikyo?
Her soul stealers lifted her into the sky.
"Kikyo" he cried "Don't go!"
She only stared sadly at him till she could not be seen anymore.
Inuyasha looked up at the sky and made a vow then and there. He was never going to let go of Kikyo, his heart was hers. For too long he'd been confused by so many things, but not anymore. He had chosen and it was Kikyo whom he loved. He would kill Naraku and then descend into death with the woman he loved.
Suddenly there was a sound from behind him, he turned. He'd been overheard?
From a tree, Kagome stepped out.
Inuyasha felt his heart constrict in pain 'Kagome, so she was watching'
Kagome. The one who set him free from his seal, the only person in so long to truly understand him, the first to truly care for him no matter how he treated her. The only person in the world whose importance was almost in the same level as Kikyo. She was a sense of warmth and kindness to him and he loved her too.
But still, he had made his choice.
Her eyes were filled with pain and betrayal there was a white shock, but he refused to look away. She deserved to know the truth of his heart.
Sesshomaru opened his eyes, steadying himself from the force of Inuyasha's emotions. His love for Kikyo was so ingrained in his memories with was like water to earth. It was a part of Inuyasha.
He was willing to become human, ridiculous; Sesshomaru could not understand his decision for such a lowly reason. A human Miko.
But something else was even more confusing. Kagome.
For some reason, the Miko appeared on his mind more and more often. Sesshomaru blamed it on Inuyasha's influence.
Sesshomaru was not one who had time nor interest in petty happenings of the heart, he was even more disinterested in Inuyasha's little love issues. And yet, when he thought of the pure betrayal and pain on the Miko's face upon seeing Inuyasha proclaim love for Kikyo, he could not understand how she could remain by Inuyasha's side when she knew his heart could never be hers. Even more so, how could she be by his side, when he was nothing like Inuyasha, and still give so much?
He recalled how shed thrown herself at him when he was nothing more than a half transformed beast and called him back to sanity with Inuyasha's name. He found her recklessness stupid, and yet, something about it would not leave his thoughts. Had he truly been…touched, by her actions?
She was just a normal human; he sensed nothing special about her, so how could she do this?
His thoughts were suddenly interrupted.
What was happening to him! All day, his power was gradually fading and he did not know why.
There was a roar, and Sesshomaru turned.
A hyena Youkai approached growling and snarling. At any other time, Sesshomaru would feel this battle to be an easy feat, but right now…he was unsure.
He readied his claws and struck.
He managed two blows, but they barely scratched the surface. As he looked at his claws, he faltered, the shock so strong he lost his footing and received a blow from the Youkai's claws to his shoulder that tor though his haori and flesh.
His claws were gone, he had human hands.
He stared dumbfounded at rounded human fingernails as the Youkai called his pack.
Sesshomaru cursed, how could he have been so short-sighted not to sense the rest of the them? Even his sense of smell was fading.
Tonight must be Inuyasha's human night, the night of the new moon. Useless Hanyou body!
His silver hair bled into black and his fangs receded into teeth till in moments he stood as a human before a pack of hyena Youkai.
For the first time in all of Sesshomaru's life, he felt truly helpless.
Without his power, he could not fight. He could not wield an untransformed Tetsaiga, and his measly human strength wasn't enough for even one of these Youkai.
A hyena struck for his neck, Sesshomaru raised his wrist as its teeth dug into flesh; the pain was so acute, he felt it even more as a human because he wasn't healing at Youkai pace.
His pride would not allow him to run, but he could not fight either. He had no efficient human weapons as the slayer did and he knew nothing of human strength to use it to his advantage. He was powerless.
"INUYASHA!"
Suddenly an arrow flew overhead and pierced two hyenas, purifying them immediately. Sesshomaru turned to find Kagome rushing out, her bow at the ready. She fired another arrow at the hyena clinging to his wrist and caught him as Sesshomaru fell. He'd lost too much blood.
"Inuyasha!" she cried "Why didn't you hide! Did you really not know about tonight?"
He tried to speak, but found himself too tired, Kagome seemed to realise this as she grew more worried.
"Alright you lot!" she cried, turning on the remaining Youkai "Get back, or ill purify you to the next century and back!"
One retreated, fearing her arrow, two others did not and she shot them both, but not before one managed to injure her.
She cried out and clutched her right arm, her wounds reopened. There was silence after the battle, nothing but their soft pants; hers from exertion, his from blood loss, it frustrated Sesshomaru to have to depend on a human for help, but when he himself was human, there was nothing he could have done.
"Miko" he called softly "Miko, stop wasting time, they may return and you and I are unfit to fight tonight."
His voice woke her up. She seemed affronted by his words, but as usual, with a sigh, she brushed it away and she ran to him. Upon reaching him she noticed for the first time, all the blood, "Inuyasha, you're hurt!" checking his wound her hands shook.
"Come on, it's getting late, I don't think I can drag you back with my arm like this, and I can't leave you to get help. Lets' find some shelter for the night!"
Her words made sense and Sesshomaru inclined his head "There's a cave nearby, often used by bears for hibernation, it should be empty this time of year" he said and Kagome nodded, hoisting him up onto her shoulder to help him walk. Normally, Sesshomaru would hate to close proximity, but now, he was tired.
She found the cave easily enough, but she was so tired she couldn't lay him down gently and preceded to dump him to the ground.
He grunted in pain.
"Oops, sorry" she said, kneeling down and rearranging him "You're really heavy"