I didn't give up on her. I couldn't. Not totally, at least.
I constantly went after her, harassing her with my kindness. She would either ignore me, or push me away. Physically and mentally.
One day I remember with perfect clarity. It was towards the end of winter, January something, because there was still a lot of snow on the ground. We were in eighth grade. That I definitely remember.
I entered the library. Elsa was sitting where she had been that morning her words had physically made me sick. She wasn't reading. In fact, I hadn't seen her pick up a book since the accident.
I peaked around the bookshelf, my eyes trained on her. There was something wild and untamed about her...and yet she remained reserved, sitting stiffly with her emotions concealed behind whatever facade she had hastily thrown up.
She caught sight of me, her sharp eyes pinning me to the ground like icicles. She didn't say anything, merely looking at me.
"Elsa," I whispered. Something briefly flashed in her eyes. Some wisp of her former self appeared, like a ghost of someone drifting across her features.
Somehow, that gave me something—some bit of confidence I had been lacking. My mouth opened and the first words I could think of tumbled out:
"Do you...wanna build a snowman?"
She suddenly stood up, slapping me across the face.
"Get away from me."
"Elsa-"
"Get away-"
I cut her off in the worst way possible, at that time. I kissed her.
It wasn't nice. In fact, it was horrible. It was violent. It was sloppy. I hated that kiss. It was like that sour kiss somehow tarnished the previous moments out lips had locked.
Neither of our eyes closed.
She slapped me again, forcing the kiss to break.
"Elsa," I breathed. "Please...don't shut me out..."
Elsa was flushed, her hand pressed over her mouth. Her eyes shone with disgust, hatred, but above all, agony. This was the last thing I wanted. I didn't want for her to get hurt. I wanted to be there for her to help her. Not...not this.
"Don't shut me out," I repeated. It didn't sound at all like an order; I was begging.
The hand that she was holding against her lips dropped suddenly. She glared at me whilst smirking, a mean feat. The look was so heinous, and it didn't belong at all on her beautiful, beautiful face.
"You were never given an invitation in, in the first place," she hissed at me, her words oozing poisonous venom as she finally replied to my previous statement. "Now leave before I make you...freak."