Leoni123: Awwww, you're so sweet. Your review seriously got me smiling so big. But just so you know, I don't care about them haters out there. Thank you so much, I'm going to live on what you said about me as a writer for a long time from now on.

I know Emma's reaction with the chair was a bit over the top, but hopefully it will make more sense in this chapter. I'm also thinking about putting the Peterson- family's history in this and things will make sense. We're in the end of the story so in the last chapters here everything will start clearing up and make sense and you'l have the answers.

Breathing more and more heavily I looked around, to the students gathering in the door, to Mr. Samuel, to Tara and to the broken window. I heard someone calling my name, several people were calling my name, Carmen, Tee, Johnny then Tyler, I could recognize their voices but yet they seemed so far away. So distant- as if I was hearing them from the other side of a wall.

"MISS PETERSON." I heard Mr. Samuel's voice and then he stomped over to me, grabbed my ear and started pulling me towards the corridor and then towards his office. The pain of having him pulling my ear was enough to wake me up but I didn't do anything to pull away- even if it hurt a lot to have him pulling my ear.

Several students came walking after, Carmen, Tee and Johnny were trying to make Mr. Samuel let go off me but if he changed something with his grip he only gripped tighter. I heard Johnny say that he'd call Mike and then I was thrown down onto a chair by Mr. Samuel's desk and he walked to close the door to the office.

The rest of what happened would afterwards become a big blur, there were thoughts spinning in my head, questions and what Tara had said about me wouldn't stop spinning in my head and I had gone back in some sort of dreaming state. Mr. Samuel got out papers and was mumbling about the window and what it would cost for him and for me all until the door flew open and Mike came rushing in.

I had a hand over my ear- without seeing it I could tell it had probably gone more blue than its usual color, I felt that it was swollen and it was throbbing and burning. Mike at first looked confused when he came in- I couldn't bear to say anything- I couldn't even bear to see him so disappointed in me so I looked to my other hand that I held in my lap.

I barely knew what happened until Mike held a hand to my back and told me to come with him. I barely knew how- but somehow Mike had managed to talk Mr. Samuel into letting him- and not Mr. Samuel or the school decide how I would be punished. I was happy it was Mike- whatever his methods might be he didn't scare me- like Mr. Samuel did.

The whole ride home I just sat there, looked out the window but barely seeing what we passed. I walked after Mike into the house, Gina was there, she started asking what was going on but Mike told her to go into the kitchen and continued leading me towards the quiet room, where I sunk don into one of the sofa and Mike ran out of the room again.

"Here." He came back with a bag of frozen peas wrapped in a kitchen towel. "Hold this to your ear." I did as I was told, then just sat there and stared in front of me again. "Emma" Mike exclaimed. "What is going on?" I took a deep breath and tried to remember exactly what Tara had said.

"She.. she.. she said my parents..." Mike put a hand to my back, held it there and told me he wasn't angry. Then told me to start from the beginning and tell him everything. "We were given an assignment to write about family, and then in the end it was only me and her left in the classroom. And she… she was asking me if I would write about my rubbish or dead parents. If I was going to write how they left me all alone in the world." I took a deep breath. "And… And I just blacked out, so I grabbed the first thing I reached and threw it towards her- it was that chair and she jumped out of the way so it hit the window instead."

I stopped telling, there wasn't anything left to say- Mike sighed and put his head in his hands. And when I started realizing what was really making me so- not angry- miserable and messed up- about what Tara had said I pulled my feet up in the sofa and hugged my knees.

"And she was right." Mike looked up, then looked to me looking confused. "My parents did leave me all alone. My dad was in the army and he'd leave for as much as almost two years at the time. Only coming home once a year for either mine or Jonas' birthday." After keeping this to myself for so long it made me feel kind of relieved to say it. "And my mum was a doctor, she'd work all day and sometimes for nights and was barely ever home. I was put to raise Jonas mostly and take care of him. He began school one year early so he wouldn't have to be home as many hours a day you know…" I stopped talking. "I did too."

Silence fell over the room. I had explained everything that needed to be explained. When someone said my parents hadn't been as good as they maybe should have- they were actually just saying what I was afraid of even thinking because I didn't want to realize the truth.

"Don't get me wrong now." I continued. "I loved my parents and they loved me. They were just gone all the time and when someone says something about that they weren't… as well as I've told everyone they were- they are just saying what I know is the truth but am too afraid to realize."

It fell silent again, none of us knew what to say- until I thought of the fact that maybe I should appologize for what I had done. "And I' m so, so sorry for what I did today I just- I blacked out and I didn't know what to do."

"It's okay." Mike exclaimed. "You know what?" I shook my head. "I am not going to punish you for this. You had your reason and I think you've learned your lesson. Though if you could tell that jerk of a headmaster that I have if he asks then it would be great- otherwise he might punish you." I let hear a short laughter.

I felt exhausted after everything that had happened today. I thought a split second about telling Mike that I was leaving. But I decided not to. Take that a day when everything wasn't so… messed up- and I was more awake. I went upstairs and into my room where I more or less fell into bed- sleeping already before I had hit the pillows.

When I woke up again Mike had already told the others parts of what I had told him- well not exactly that but he had told them that there was a reason for what I had done- and that they'll weren't allowed to ask. Yet of course they did anyway. But I only told them that Tara had been talking about my family. Left out most of it- I didn't see a reason for why they'd have to know.

Later that day I sat in my room with the assignment Mr. Anderson had given us. Only yesterday evening I had been so sure about what a family really was but no I just couldn't get an idea of how I should start. I had begun writing something about how I lost my family- but I wasn't going to stand in front of the class and read something that they could make off that I was moaning again so I had thrown it away.

At last I wrote "dear mum" on the top of the paper, it wasn't for the assignment. But in the book I read- de kallade mig Ise- there was a part where the head character writes a letter to her Anorexia to kind of let go of it. And maybe write letters to my family would help me to let go of them in a way- not say goodbye. But maybe, just maybe become a little bit happier with the fact that I had told them everything I needed to.

I wrote a letter to mum that afternoon, then went downstairs and asked Mike for an envelope. I'd write letters for dad and Jonas too, then when I came home I would go to their graves and read the letters out loud. But when I'd finished the letter for mum it was already so late I was too tired to write another one.

The next day- Tuesday was October the ninth. It meant that it was six days left until I had to tell Mike that I was leaving. I was walking through the hallways at school in the morning and heard people whispering about me and what I had done the day before. I just walked past everyone and into the right question, didn't look at any of them or anywhere except where I was going.

I told Mr. Samuel Mike had taken away all of my pocket money until the bill for the window was paid, told him I was also grounded for the next month and he seemed happy with it and let me go. I was surprise by how easy I could lie to him because I had never been a good liar but- well- he believed me- that was enough for me.

I didn't tell Mike that day. So the Tuesday became Wednesday, the day Tracy told me about her plan. She would pretend to be selling something by the door while Jordan helped me climb through a window into the house and then lead me to where Jess was- then I'd talk to Jess, Tracy would take all of the care- worker's attention for all the while until I climbed out again and we left.

I didn't tell Mike on Wednesday either. So the night became yet another day and went to Thursday, then Friday, Saturday and at last Sunday- the day before I'd have to tell Mike- and the day I was going to speak to Jess.

"So are you ready?" Tracy asked me on the way to Sunshine house. I nodded and sneaked to the back of the house and the window Jordan was waiting in while Tracy knocked the door, Jordan reached his hands down to me and pulled me up with help of his friend Mark. I came into a living room- but it didn't look at all like the living room at elm tree house. At Elm Tree House, every room and environment was colorful and warm. Here every wall and every piece of furniture and everything was plain white. No shelves, no TV, no mats, nothing.

Jordan walked in front of me up a set of stairs and opened the door in a hallway- brown. Then I came into a- yellow- room where Jess laid on the bed reading some girly paper. "Jess." Jordan exclaimed and then showed me to go inside the room. I sat down by Jess on the bed but she barely looked up.

"What do you want Emma?" She mumbled and turned the page in her paper. "I don't want to talk to you."

"I want to talk to you. I'm leaving Britain in some while to go home- and then I want to have said everything that needs to be said… Jess… I'm really sorry if… what you did was something that I made you do- I would never have done that on purpose."

"Well guess what then? Then you maybe should have thought a little about that before you said everything you needed to say the last time."

"I just wanted to say I'm sorry Jess…." There followed a long silence. "And I hoped that we wouldn't have to fight anymore cause I don't want to leave this place and think that I run away from anything"

"Emma." Jordan came running. "We've got a problem. Riley's com…" Just in the middle of Jordan's sentence, a man- perhaps in his mid- twenties came into the room, looked to me, then to Jess, then to Jordan, then to me again.

"WHAT were you THINKING?" Mike looked to me and Tracy when we were back at elm tree house in the office with Mike- breathing heavily of anger and looking to the both of us. "Emma, Tracy, I've already told you both- you cannot go to that home- the ones that go there have real problems and need help and that's why noone else is let in there. Emma- I'd told you, you couldn't get to speak with Jess…"

"But Mike- there was something that I needed to say to her." I sounded more whining than what I had planned at first, and whwne Mike began asking why. I just heard hit fall out of me. "Because I'm leaving Mike."

Uh- oh.

Yeah I know, this is a bit fast forward but… you'll have to live with that. I wanted to get it done so I'd have every story I was going to update during the holidays here updated- and this is the last one. So yay :) And this story's almost finished… Anyway, bye until next time