Touch My Heart Chapter 11, a days of our lives fanfic

Touch My Heart - Chapter 11

A/N: Well, hello again! It's been a while! I have a surprise for you! We have a new writer that joined us in our little writing adventure! Jen, Amber, Christina and I would like to welcome Michael Edward McFee who has just joined it with us on Touch My Heart! This is so exciting! I'm fangirling! Welcome to the FallenAngels Mike! We're so glad to have you with us! Now, here's Chapter 11! Leave some love! - Roxy.

This chapter is by: Roxy, Christina, Jen and Mike. Unfortunately, Amber was not able to write in this one. She just started taking class' and has also been very busy with work. We wish her all the best and hope to see her back for the next one! Oh, and here is a little spoiler: Prom is coming soon! (wink)

(Will's POV)

The feeling of having my beautiful sunshine, my Sonny, in my arms was amazing enough, but to have him ride out his pleasure, trembling at my touch, moaning out my name while in my arms, well, that might just be the best feeling I've ever experienced. So far, anyway. This subtle genius of a man keeps introducing me to all sorts of new emotions that just when I think I've reached the pinnacle, he does something to surpass all that I felt before. This must be true love. The very weight of that admission made my stomach flutter and dampness return to my eyes. I would be so broken if Sonny ever left me. This, too, was something I've never felt before. Until now, relationships had been fleeting for me; they were a way to pass the time and satisfy my raging libido. But this with Sonny was so much more...I needed him to fill the emptiness that had kept me feeling like half a man for so long.

Sonny continued to shake a little, so I covered his face with soft kisses until his body calmed. We took a deep breath together, almost as if on cue, and looked deeply into each other's eyes. I was about to say something, perhaps remind him of how much I loved him, when he pulled his gaze from mine and buried his face as far as he could into the crook of my neck. We did just experience something incredible together, so I understood Sonny's need for silence. Instead of talking, I cleaned my hands on his abandoned towel and softly rubbed my palms against the bare skin of his back. That's when I started to feel Sonny tremble once again.

"Sonny, my love, are you okay?"

He didn't budge and kept his face hidden. Was he upset by what just happened? Did he already regret what we shared? I had to know.

"Baby, please tell me that you're okay", I begged trying to pull back to look him in the eye. He fought pretty hard to keep from looking at me, so I finally conceded, "You don't have to look at me if you're not comfortable, but please let me know that you aren't hurt or confused about what we just shared."

"Will", he mumbled into my shoulder, "W-was that...", and he didn't finish.

"Yes, it was. Wait - haven't you ever...I mean, have you never made yourself feel that way before?"

I felt him use his hands now to cover himself even further, clearly embarrassed and more than a little unsure. I took a deep breath and let the realization of this sink in. This was Sonny's very first time.

Tears started to fill my eyes at the significance of this moment. I had to see my sunshine; I had to be able to look him in the eyes to let him know how special I felt. So, I demanded it, hoping Sonny wouldn't recoil and retreat from me.

"Sonny", I said firmly, "look at me now."

He slowly moved his hands from his face and lifted his head. He would have been looking right at me except Sonny had his eyes closed tightly shut. "Son, open your eyes sweetheart", I whispered and he complied. The depth I saw in those perfect brown orbs made me gasp, and he started to moved like he was going to hide again, "Don't you dare. There is nothing I love more than looking into those beautiful brown eyes."

His lips turned up just slightly at the corners, and he nodded.

"I need you to listen to me, my love, okay? No looking away."

He nodded again.

"What just happened was what you thought it was; you had an orgasm."

I watched his face flush to a bright red, but he kept his word and didn't look away.

"Sonny, this is something that two people share when they really care about each other. You wanted me to touch you, right? It felt good didn't it?", I hoped for an affirmative response. I was pretty sure of the answer considering the outcome.

"Yes", he whispered, "I-I know what happens to men and women from my biology class. I've been taught about sex."

"Okay, but biology doesn't teach you about two men or two women; it doesn't teach you about making yourself feel good; it doesn't teach you about all the other wonderful stuff you can do with your partner."

Sonny shook his head in agreement.

"Sonny, what just happened was beautiful, it was incredibly special and you should never, ever be embarrassed. That is what you're feeling, right?"

"It just happened so fast, and I couldn't stop it. You felt so good, but then I was afraid I did something wrong."

"No, my love", I brushed away the frown lines from his forehead, "What you did was perfect."

His eyes opened wide, "It was?"

I couldn't help but chuckle, but at the same time, I felt so overwhelmed with emotion. A tear or two escaped my eyes as I held Sonny's intensely, "Yes. It was. And just so you know, I plan on making you feel that way many more times in the future", I concluded with a wink.

Sonny smiled broadly, clearly free of his previous doubts, "But...", and he paused as if he were trying to formulate the right words.

"Listen, this is us, okay? We take things at our own pace. There is more we can do together to show our love, but we only do that when we're both ready, alright?"

He nodded his head in relief. I must have read his hesitancy just right. Sonny reached up with his fingertips and brushed away the few tears that had escaped my eyes, "I love you."

Hearing those words from him, initiated by him, made my heart swell and truth be told, my body start tingling again. Sonny had found relief through his release, but I hadn't. And no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't tame my excitement for him, "I love you too, Sonny", and then I kissed him hungrily.

"Will?", he asked when I let him come up for air. I felt that twinge in my chest once again. I just told him we'd take things at our own pace, and here I was, practically mauling him minutes later. I met his eyes apologetically. "Do you want me to touch you like that, too?"

My heart jumped for joy, "Yes, Sonny, I do...but only if you want to. I'd never make you do something if you didn't want-"

He silenced me with a kiss, "I want to", he said simply, and I thought I was going to lose it right there.

And that's why when the front door of Sonny's house slammed shut, we both started scrambling frantically to make ourselves presentable. After everything that had been going on between us, I had no doubt that Alex would have to check on us. It was just his way. He couldn't leave anything alone...and though right now I found it frustrating, pulling us from this post pleasure-filled bliss, I was also envious that Sonny had people around him who cared so much.

I jumped from the bed, pulling my boxers and jeans back up to my waist and buttoning them quickly. Sonny ran to his dresser, where thankfully, he had set clothes out for himself before he showered. I watched in awe as he meticulously pulled on his boxers followed by his t-shirt, then his socks, making sure the seam near his toes was just right, then his pants and finally his flannel shirt. He was just finishing up with the last buttons when we heard a knock on his door.

Sonny looked at me and panicked, "Will, your shirt!", I had been watching him so carefully that I forgot to put my own t-shirt back on. I grabbed it from the bed and threw it over my head haphazardly.

I walked over to Sonny quickly and took him into my arms, "Breathe baby", and I felt him take a deep breath, "I'm sure your brothers just want to make sure everything is alright with us, okay? You take the lead, and I'll help you if you need me to. I love you, you know."

He smiled at me sheepishly and nodded. He brushed his lips against mine ever so softly and then went to answer his door.

(Alex's POV)

"I wonder if they finally worked things out?", I asked Joey with a hint of worry as I was just about to unlock the front door.

God know how longs it's been since Sonny's been so happy. He's finally in a place where he feels comfortable enough to finally open himself up to us in a way that he never has before, and I don't want whatever that's going on with Sonny to jeopardize any progress that he has made so far. It's a miracle you know? And I'm pretty sure that this little miracle has a name. He's called Will Horton.

"I sure hope they did. I don't think I can take another day of watching Jackson's moping around like a love-sick puppy", Joey said as he walked right passed me and took off his jacket.

"It's Sonny now, remember?", I said with a slight giggle and closed the front door shut.

"Oh, yeah! That's right! Sonny...", Joey said while rolling his eyes, "Can't forget that now, can we? We don't want Sonny bunny to have a fit if we don't call him by his little pet name."

"It's not a pet name, it's what he wants to be called, Joey. I think it's kinda cute!", I pointed out, taking off my own jacket and placing it on the coat rack.

"Whatever, man. I think it's weird", Joey said as he pulled off his jacket and dropped it on the bench, "I'm hungry! What time is dad coming home?"

"No idea, but I was thinking we could order out tonight? I could go check up on Ja - I mean Sonny and see if Will would like to join us for dinner. We could make it a movie night or something?", I asked and started walking towards the stairs, but Joey grabbed my arms to stop me.

"You sure you wanna go up there, Alex?", he asked and looked at me strangely.

"Why not? I'm just going to ask them what they would like?", I explain.

It was just a simple question, right? I can't understand why Joey is making such a big deal out of this.

"Well, maybe because they're still...", he paused, "Making up?"

"That's insane. Sonny wouldn't...Will would never...", I started saying but then stopped when I realized what Joey was getting at, "Oh God! Would you stop thinking like that?"

"I'm sorry, Alex. But you need to get it through your thick head that Sonny is in a relationship now and he's going to want his privacy, you know?", Joey said and smiled, "Alone time?", he repeated, making sure I got the message the second time around.

"I get that but...He's not ready for what you're implying, Joey. Sonny's inexperienced."

"Where you not there on Sunday when Sonny practically had his tongue down Will's throat in front of us? Inexperienced my ass!"

"What are you trying to say, Joey?", I asked, "Just come out and say it!"

"Well, maybe Sonny isn't as innocent as everyone makes him out to be. Or maybe he's got a great teacher teaching him the ropes", Joey said with a wink.

Just as I was about to say something to Joey, Sonny's came fumbling down the stairs in a hurry.

"Well, well...", Joey hummed, "Speaking of the little devil", he said looking at Sonny with a grin.

Sonny stood there completely dumfounded with no idea whatsoever what Joey's talking about. Soon after, Will came down and stood next to Sonny with his face totally flushed.

"You two look like you've both been caught with your hands in the cookie jar", Joey pointed out and laughed.

Will gave Sonny a look and it wasn't just any look. It was a look like "Oh my God! They know and we're so busted!". Sonny turned over and smiled at Will who was trying to hide his face behind him.

"Well, don't just stand there, come and sit down, we're ordering take out", I said trying to cut them both so slack. I know that Joey can be very persistent at times when it comes to making a mockery out an awkward situation. He thrives for it.

"Yeah, uh...yeah", Will breathed out and took Sonny's hand and pulled him across the room and they both took a seat at the table. Neither of them spoke.

I chuckled slightly, because if you could see the look on their faces, well...It says, "I'm so guilty!"

So, I decided to make small talk, hoping to lighten the awkward silence that consumed the entire room, "So, what are you having? We decided on pizza", I informed them.

"That's fine", Will said, and Jackson nodded.

"Alright, so pizza it is! I'll place the order", Joey offered and left the room to place the call.

Will reached over and wrapped his arm around Sonny's shoulders and smiled. It took that as I sign that they both must have worked things out, "So, you to good?", I asked without prying for details.

To my surprise, Sonny was the one who answered first, "We're good", he said and looked over at Will for his approval.

Will lifted his hand up and cupped Sonny's cheek, "We're great!", he repeated and kissed his cheek softly, "Oh and by the way, thanks for orchestrating your little plan with Joey. It totally worked", Will said gave me cheeky grin.

"Oh, yeah", I chuckled, "Sorry about that. Just trying to help. But if you don't mind me asking, how did you find out?", I asked curiously.

"Well, for starters, I was walking by the student council office when I got your text and over heard a few students talking about the meeting being cancelled. So I put two and two together and figured it out."

"Oh, I see", I said and lowered my head hoping that Will wasn't mad at us for butting in his business.

"It's fine. It's actually nice to know that you care enough to push us back together. Sometimes, a little push is all you need to make things better. Thanks man."

"Wait, you're not angry with us for sticking our noses into you're relationship?", I asked, surprised over Will's reaction.

"Why would I be? You just helped us work things out. I'm very grateful that this was all it took to get my Sonny here smiling again", he said and squeezed his arm a little tighter around my little brother, "I should be the one who's sorry for making you help me with my homework and having to listen to me go on and on about basketball when I know nothing about it."

"Yeah, Joey kinda figured it out when you didn't know who Koby was", I laughed, "But I'm glad things are good between you two. You're good together."

"We are", Will admitted and looked at Sonny, "He's perfect", Will whispered and made Sonny blush furiously.

Sonny then leaning forwards and whispered something into Will's ear. I didn't hear what he said, but what ever it was, it made Will squirm all over his chair, "Son...", he moaned, "This isn't the time to..."

Suddenly, Sonny grabbed Will's face and kissed him hard and Will didn't try stop him either. They were making out right in front of me like I wasn't even in the room, "Uh, guys", I said trying to get their attention, but nothing. They didn't even acknowledge my presence, "Hello? I'm the room here?", I said a little louder, but I still wasn't able to reach them.

Then, just as I was about to scream, Joey walking back in and made his grand entrance, "Gross! Get a room you two!", he screamed out and finally caught their attention.

Will broke away from Sonny and the both sat there panting, "Shit! I'm sorry", Will said first and Sonny just sat there and looked at me, "We got...I was just...Shit!"

"Yeah, yeah, save it, stud! PDA's are for BCD. Not the kitchen table. Unless it's your thing, then that cool. I hear many couples are into being exhibitionist's. It could be fun, but I would suggest that you wait until the house is empty and...", Joey started off, but I stopped him before he got in to great details.

"Joey! Shut up!"

"Don't you dare tell me to shut up", Joey replied angrily, "I was just saying that I would rather not be the voyeur when I walk into a room. That's all."

Will and Sonny sat there with their mouths half-opened and stunned by Joey's remarks. It took a few seconds for Will to respond, "Look guys, I just got carried away. I'm sorry, Joey. Alex, I didn't mean to make you watch us making out like that. God! This is so embarrassing", Will said and covered his face.

"Will, don't worry about it. It happens. Well not really here, but it does", I said to put Will at ease.

But then Joey had to out in his two cents, "I guess we better get use to it, if you two keep going at it like bunnies."

"Bunnies?", Will asked, "We don't...I mean, we never...", Will started saying, but Sonny stopped him before he had a chance to explain.

"We don't have sex!", Sonny blurted from out of nowhere. The boy doesn't have any clue that this wasn't the proper time to make such an affirmation.

And to make things worst, Joey stop at it.

"You sure about that?", Joey asked looking at Sonny who still had no idea why Joey was looking at him that way.

Before we knew it, Sonny was confessing what just happened between him and Will in his room.

"Will touched me and I...", Sonny started saying but Will totally freak out and cut him off.

Will looked mortified.

"Sonny!", Will screamed and frightened my little brother. He shook his head from side to side and looked over at Joey, "Look, we never had sex, okay?"

"Well that's a relief!", Joey said and grinned.

Will immediately became flustered and Sonny was obviously getting upset. This conversation was quickly spiraling out of control.

"Alright, I think it's time we changed the subject here. Why don't you two go back upstairs and talk about what happened earlier, cause I think you both need to come to an understanding on what you can and can not say or do in front of people, and you", I said and pointed directly to Joey, "You and I need to have a little chat!", I got up from the table and grabbed Joey's arm roughly and pulled him towards the living room.

"Ouch!", Joey hissed.

"Come on", I said as I dragged him out of the kitchen and into the living room, but stopped in front of Sonny and Will who were about to head on upstairs, "You and I will have a chat later", I said and pointed at Sonny, "Oh and by the way. Maybe when you're trying to get dressed in a hurry, trying not to get caught with your hands down Will's pants, maybe you should try putting your shirt on straight, you know? And you", I said and turned over to Will, "You might wanna try zipping up your pants if you don't want people thinking you two just had sex. Just a suggestion."

Sonny frowned and lowered his eyes like he had done something wrong, when the truth was, he hadn't, "I'm not mad, Sonny. I'm just disappointed that's all", I said to reassure him that I wasn't angry. That last thing I want is for Sonny to think I'm mad at him.

But that didn't do me any good. Sonny didn't acknowledge me and left to go up to his room.

Out of all my brothers, I thought that Sonny would have been able to come to me and have a talk about this before something like this happened. I knew deep down inside, Will would never do, or force Sonny into doing anything he wasn't ready to do. But it would have been nice to at least have a warning before it happened. And to be honest, I really wasn't mad at them. I guess I wasn't ready to head about my little brother is being sexually active for the first time. In the end, I just wanted what was best for Sonny and that includes Will being part of his life.

I took a deep, agonizing breath and turned over to Will before leaving the room, "Will?"

"Yeah?", Will hesitantly answered.

"I'd like to talk to you later as well, if that's alright?", I asked.

"Sure, it's alright. Just come up when your done", he offered.

"Yeah, okay", I nodded and left the area to have a private conversation with Joey.

(Sonny's POV)

"Why was Alex disappointed in me? Did I do something wrong?", I ask myself as I turn to leave. I can't get the look of shame on his face when I told him that I let Will touch me, out of my head. I just don't understand why that's a bad thing? I read it was ok if I wanted it, and I did want it, so much.

And Will? He looked like he was embarrassed by me. I don't ever want him to feel like he is ashamed or embarrassed to be with me. He should talk to me if he ever feels that way, and I'll stop what ever is making him uncomfortable.

I take another slow step and frown. Maybe I shouldn't have told, maybe that made Will mad. I groan, and now my brothers want to talk to us.

I take the third stair step and look down at my dragging feet. This is going to be a long climb up to my room. I felt like a child that had been chastised for being happy, and that's not fair.

I take the fourth step, maybe I should have talked to Alex before I let Will touch me. Maybe he's right? Or maybe he would have talked me out of it and that's not fair to me and Will. He's too protective of me and I don't think I like that any more.

I take the fifth step, Will is my boyfriend, my brothers have no right to try to tell me what I can and can't do with him. I'm not a little kid any more, they need to understand that!

In a matter of 5 steps, I have went from confused, to sad, and now to angry. I can't believe that Alex would speak to me that way much less do it in front of Will.

I take the sixth step, I can't wait to have Will back in my arms. He makes me feel happy, and safe. He will take this anger away, he always does. That is, if he's not angry or upset with me?

I take the seventh and final step, and I slowly raise my hand to the knob and open my bedroom door. I am so scared now, that I've upset Will. I have so many emotions boiling up inside of me, I don't know what to do or think. Why do things have to be so complicated? It's just Will, and he's the love of my life. Why can't I have that without my brothers butting in?

I open the door and walk into my room and plop down on the bed, my face buried into the crook of my arms. I think I want to cry, but the tears don't come. I know the boys are downstairs lecturing Will and it's all my fault.

I hear the 'thud, thud, thud, of someone coming up the stairs, and brace myself for the conversation that's about to happen. I just hope Will is still happy being with me.

My doorknob turns and Will appears. He has a slight smile on his face, and that tells me that he's ok. I sigh in relief. We need to talk too and I need to understand why what I did was wrong.

(Alex's POV)

With my hand still grasped tightly around Joey's arm I flung him forwards as we reached the couch at the far end of the living he collapsed on the couch, I could still see my brother's pained expression, as he started rubbing his arm with his free hand; and I was about to say lay into him, but he got his words out first.

"Ouch! You know Big Brother, that hurt! What the heck is wrong with you? You can't have it both ways Big Brother. You want me to treat Jackson...and yeah, I know he wants to be called Sonny...but to me he's still Jackson..If you want me treat Jackson like I would anyone else then you can't be angry at me when I do...Jackson and Will were...well they were doing something upstairs together, so like the dutiful brother I am, I teased him about it...and why the heck shouldn't I!?"

That question startled me. Joey was right. All he was doing was treating Jackson...Sonny..I've got to start calling him Sonny..All he was doing was treating Sonny like a normal younger brother who was just caught 'fooling around' with his significant other. But it wasn't that simple and I knew that. I also knew that Joey knew that too.

"You know that it isn't that simple Joey. Sonny is different. And yes I know...you feel like we all spend so much energy on Sonny..and maybe not enough on you.."

I was interrupted by a rather red-faced younger brother who was staring at me with incredulity written all across his face, "Now you stop right there Alex! This is not a jealously thing! I am happy for Jackson! He is finally finding himself! He has finally found himself someone he could open up to! Maybe I'm a little jealous of Will, because Will did something in a matter of weeks that we tried for years to do. But I'm happy for them! You might want to ask yourself why you are jealous; why you still want to treat Jackson like a baby?"

I was about to explain to Joey that I was only trying to protect Sonny like I always have. It was my duty as a big brother to protect my younger siblings. I only wanted the best for Sonny. But I didn't get a chance to do that. Joey had interrupted me yet again to say something that I would have to think long and hard about.

"Alex..I'm going to call for Pizza..thanks for the shove and the talk".

I saw Joey rise up from the couch and head towards the kitchen where he had left his phone. He then abruptly turned around and said, "I am a little jealous Alex. I'll get over it. But you need to ask yourself why you reacted the way you did when you found out Jackson and Will were being intimate with each other...Solve your own problems before you try to solve mine...okay?"

That statement shook me; to the core. Joey was right. I did have some issues of my own to deal I walked towards the stairwell leading upstairs I resolved not to let these issues get in the way of making sure Jackson...Sonny...making sure Sonny was okay.

(Will's POV)

"Babe?", I asked as I walked into Sonny's room, but he didn't answer me straight off.

He was sitting on the edge of his bed looking into thin air. I don't know what I was expecting after what just happened down stairs, but I was hoping that things wouldn't be this awkward with Sonny.

I slowly approached my confused boyfriend and took a seat next to him. I didn't know what I was supposed to do or say, but I decided on going with what was in my heart, "You wanna talk about what just happened, babe?", I asked again and hoped this time, Sonny would open up to me in a way he never has before.

He was my boyfriend...

We should be able to talk about things like this...

Or at least I hoped we could...

"I'm sorry...", he weeped and looked up at me with tears in his eyes.

A small smile came across my face as I wrapped my arms around him, "It's okay, babe", I said as I kissed the top of his head and pulled him closer, "You have nothing to be sorry about. I was just caught off guard with your forwardness."

Sonny pulled away and looked at me with worried eyes, "I shouldn't have told them, Will", he whispered softly and buried his face in the crock of my neck.

I could see he felt awful about what had happened, and I get that. But sometimes, things aren't that easy. Sometimes, some things are better left to be kept private and I needed to make him understand that, without making things worst for him.

"No, you shouldn't have, but it's okay. Alex and Joey will get over it eventually, but...", I started saying and paused cause I wanted to make sure what I said next came out right, "But some things are meant to be kept private, Sonny. What we do in our private time should be kept just that, private. Do you understand that?"

He shook his head in agreement, but I could still see in his eyes that something else was bothering him. It was more that telling his brothers about the things we did in our private time. It was something bigger and much more complicated for Sonny.

"Babe? What's wrong?", I asked as I got off the bed and got on my knees before him.

"It's nothing", he answered.

"Listen, babe. Whatever it is, you can tell me about it. I'm not going to get angry."

It took a few minutes to convince him other wise, but finally he spoke, "Will? Are you ashamed? I mean, to be with me?", he said in a whisper.

His words cut right through me like a sharp blade right through the heart. My Sonny thought I was ashamed of him? How could he ever think something like that? I couldn't help but wonder if I did something to make him feel this way?

"Sonny, I would never be ashamed to be with you, okay? You're the most important thing in my life. What would ever make you think that?", I asked as I dragged myself a little closer to him.

"It's just...You got angry when I told Joey about, you know? About us touching each other. I - I just thought you were ashamed of me. That's all", Sonny said and lowered his eyes.

"Hey! Looked at me", I said and lifted his beautiful face so I could looked into his eyes, "Look at me, babe", I said again, and this time, he lifted those precious chocolate-brown eyes and stared right at me, "I am so proud to be with you, Sonny. You have no idea what it means to me that you've chosen me to be your boyfriend. You're so amazing, and so...", I took a deep breath, "Perfect!"

"Will, I'm far from being perfect", he said, pushing the compliment aside.

"That maybe true, but you're perfect for me."

Sonny smiled, "Will..."

"Wait! Let me finish", I said, cutting him off, "I knew from the moment we decided to be together that this, what we have between us, wouldn't be easy. I knew what I was getting into when I decided to pursue a relationship with you, but some people might think that I'm taking advantage of you in someway."

"But you're not!"

"I know, but not everyone is going to see it like that, babe. People are quick to judge. And I don't even want you thinking that I'm ashamed of you ever again. What I'm simply trying to do, is make things easier for us", I explained.

"By hiding what we do in our private time?", he asked.

"No, Sonny. Keeping our private time a secret, is not hiding it. It's keeping it just between us, so that it's something we share only together. Something precious."

"Like what happened earlier?", he innocently asked.

"Exactly! What happened between us earlier was amazing and precious, but it was meant to only be shared between us. Not with Alex and Joey."

Sonny nodded, "Alex and Joey told me that it wasn't okay to have someone touch me like we did earlier. No exception", he admitted, "But I wanted you to touch me, Will. I liked the way it made me feel."

"I know, Sonny, but Alex and Joey were right."

"They were?", he asked and looked at me confused.

I nodded, "No one, and I mean no one should ever touch you like the way that we did earlier if you're not one hundred percent sure that you're okay with it. What we did wasn't wrong, but it was something very intimate that only people who love each other share together."

"I love you, so does that mean it's okay for us to touch each other like that?"

"Yes, Sonny. It's okay, but only if you are sure that being touched like that is something you want and agree to. If at anytime you don't feel comfortable with it, then you have to tell me to stop. And I promise, I wont be angry, Okay?"

"Okay", he said and smiled, "I love you, Will."

"I love you too, babe, and when we're finally ready be together, I don't want it to be just sex. I want to make love to you and only you.", I said back to him just as we heard a knock on the door, "Shit! That must be Alex waiting to kick my ass", I said and giggled, "You ready to talk to him?", I asked and waited for Sonny's approval before letting him in.

He shook his head, "Yeah, I guess."

"Alright, her goes nothing", I said as I lifted myself off the floor and answered the door.

(Sonny's POV)

"Babe?", he asked as he peeks his head in, and tries to get my attention. I'm not sure whether to throw myself in his arms and apologize or stay right here and see what he has to say. I opt to stay in the spot that I'm in and wait. I sit up on the edge of the bed and stare at the wall. I'm not ready, I take that back, I don't want to have this conversation.

Will closes my bedroom door, and walks into my room very slowly. He looks a little scared too. When he reaches my bed, he sits down and wraps his arm around my shoulder. I buried my head into the crook of his neck and smell his essence. He's amazing.

"You want to talk about what just happened, babe?", he asked. The tears that I was needed to release finally came. I am so overwhelmed that they start free-falling down my face.

"I'm sorry...", I say into his neck, then lean up to look into his crystal eyes. They ground me when I'm upset.

He smiles and wraps his arms tightly around me and lays a kiss into my moppy hair.

"It's okay babe", he said and kisses my forehead. I lean into the kiss and his lips linger there longer than necessary.

"You have nothing to be sorry about. I was just caught off guard with your forwardness."

I'm so confused right now. I lean back, and wipe a few tears away from my eyes, so that I can see him better.

"I shouldn't have told them", I wailed and buried my face again into the crook of his neck. He's making me feel warm and his touch is electric.

"No, you shouldn't have, but it's okay. Alex and Joey will get over it eventually, but...but some things are meant to be kept private, Sonny. What we do in our private time should be kept just that, private. Do you understand that?"

Will looked into my eyes and smiled.

I sighed, maybe he wasn't as upset with me as I thought. I nodded my head, saying that I understood what he was saying, although I'm not quite sure that I did. I'm not sure what's private and what's not, but we'll talk about that later.

"Babe? What's wrong?"

He says and slides off of the bed and got on his knees before me. He takes my hands in his and kisses each of my fingers.

"It's nothing", I mumbled, tears are threatening to come again and I blink a few time to prevent them from falling.

"Listen, babe. Whatever it is, you can tell me about it. I'm not going to get angry."

He kissed my eye and smiled at me. I sit there for a bit, debating on how to ask him if he's ashamed to be with me. That would be the worst feeling in the world, and I'm not sure I can handle it. He's sitting patiently in front of me, giving me the time that I need to get my thoughts in order and ask my question.

"Will? Are you ashamed? I mean, to be with me?", I whispered.

I knew my voice wouldn't hold up because I'm so nervous and scared that the answer will be "yes".

Will's eyes go wide and he gasps loudly as his hand leaves mine and rests on his chest.

"Sonny, I would never be ashamed to be with you, okay? You're the most important thing in my life. What would ever make you think that?", he asks as he slides closer to me, his hands resting again on mine in my lap. He adjusts his posture so that his back is straight, not slouched, so that he can get closer.

"It's just...You got angry when I told Joey about, you know? About us touching each other. I - I just thought you were ashamed of me. That's all", I shrug and look down at my hands. Tears drop from my eyes to our conjoined hands and he cocks his head to the side, deep in thought as his eyes pierce mine.

"Hey! Looked at me, babe", he said and tilts my head up a little so that we're staring at each other. His eyes are beautiful and I could get lost in them. And I do, for a moment, until he begins speaking again.

"I am so proud to be with you, Sonny. You have no idea what it means to me that you've chosen me to be your boyfriend. You're so amazing, and so...Perfect!"

Me? Perfect?

"I'm far from perfect Will", I said. How can he say that. Until I met him, I didn't have any friends except for my brothers, I couldn't talk because I didn't have anyone to talk to. Now that I have Will, I have a best friend and someone to talk to. He's perfect, he made me who I am right now.

"That maybe true, but you're perfect for me", I sighed, "Will...", I began speaking again, but he's having none of that.

"Wait! Let me finish. I knew from the moment we decided to be together that this, what we have between us, wouldn't be easy. I knew what I was getting into when I decided to pursue a relationship with you, but some people might think that I'm taking advantage of you in someway."

I gasped, he thinks this is his fault?

"But you're not!", I rubbed his shoulder and down his arm, my hand comes back up and rests behind of his neck. He smiles a sad smile.

I cock my head to the side, trying to understand what he's saying, "By hiding what we do in our private time?"

"No, Sonny. Keeping our private time a secret, is not hiding it. It's keeping it just between us, so that it's something we share only together. Something precious."

He reaches up and cups my cheek, I lean into his touch and give him a small smile.

"Like what happened earlier?", I asked.

"Exactly! What happened between us earlier was amazing and precious, but it was meant to only be shared between us. Not with Alex and Joey."

I think I understand now. He doesn't want to hide me, he loves me so much he wants to protect me.

"Alex and Joey told me that it wasn't okay to have someone touch me like we did earlier. No exception, but I wanted you to touch me, Will. I liked the way it made me feel", I said, jumbling my hands together. I'm looking into his eyes and they're giving me the courage to talk to him right now about this.

"I know, Sonny, but Alex and Joey were right."

"They were?"

I thought that it was okay?

"No one, and I mean no one should ever touch you like the way that we did earlier if you're not one hundred percent sure that you're okay with it. What we did wasn't wrong, but it was something very intimate that only people who love each other share together."

"I love you, so does that mean it's okay for us to touch each other like that?", I asked, still not quite sure if what I did was wrong or not.

"Okay", I give him a huge smile now. We can still be together!, "I love you, Will."

"I love you too, babe and when we're finally ready be together, I don't want it to be just sex. I want to make love to you and only you", he said as we hear a knock on the door.

I'm not sure what he means by that though. I might asking him about that later.

"Shit! That must be Alex waiting to kick my ass", Will giggled, and it was like music to my ears!, "You ready to talk to him?"

I sigh and nod my head, "Yeah, I guess."

"Alright, her goes nothing", he says with a bigger smile and lifts himself off the floor and answered the door.

(Alex's POV)

"Hey, can I come in?", I asked when Will opened the door to Sonny's room.

"Yeah, sure. Come in", Will offered and move over to the side to let me in, "I'll let you two talk. I'll be down stairs if you need me", he informed Sonny and left to go down stairs.

"Thanks, I won't be long."

I closed the door shut and walked over and took a seat next to Sonny, "I'm sorry for being an ass down stairs", I admitted, "I never wanted to make you feel uncomfortable in any way."

Sonny shrugged his shoulders, "It's okay."

"No, Sonny. It's not okay. I shouldn't have made you feel like what happened between you and Will was wrong. Don't get me wrong, I'm not thrilled that you two, well...you know? But I'm not angry that you two are being, well..."

"You can say the word, Alex", Sonny hinted.

"Yeah, I know. It's just going to take some time for me to use to the idea of my little brother being in a...a...", I tried saying, but for some reason, I couldn't get the words to come out of my mouth I tried. Honestly. But it felt like once I said those words out loud, that I would have to admit that my little brother was indeed in a sexual relationship with his partner, and that was something that was hard for me to come to terms with under the circumstances. Good thing Sonny was there to help me through it.

"A sexually active relationship?", Sonny finished.

"Yeah, that", I giggled cause it was kinda funny hearing my bother say those words out loud.

"So, you are not angry at me? You said no one was to touch me like that ever?"

I remember the talk I had with Sonny when he first started to show interest in Will. Both Joey and I explained it to him that no one was to touch him in anyway sexually. I wasn't sure if he understood what we were trying to tell him at the time. Sonny's communication skills we're very limited at the time. He simply nodded and most looked confused as to what we were saying. But after our conversation today, I know without a doubt, that Sonny understood the message loud and clear. And I'm happy about that.

"No. I'm not mad, Sonny. I'm just disappointed. I was hoping that you would have talked to me about something like this before it happened."

"I wanted to tell you, but I was embarrassed", he admitted, "I thought you would be angry at me for wanting Will to touch me when you said that no one was allowed to."

"Oh, Sonny. When I said that to you, it was only to protect you. All I want is for you to be happy and I don't want anyone every trying to hurt you in any way. Listen, I'm going to tell you something, okay? And I don't want to make you uncomfortable either. Is that alright?", I asked and waited to make sure that he was alright with the next part of our conversation before I started.

Sonny nodded and looked at me sheepishly.

"When two people love each other, they sometimes decide on taking things to another level, and that's where sex comes in."

"Another level?", Sonny questioned and raised his eyebrows.

"Yes, Sonny. What I mean by another level, is that some people want to engage in other activities that goes beyond, touching and kissing."

"Like having sex?", he asked in a whisper as if he was trying to make sure no one would hear him.

"Yes, Sonny. Sex is something that couples do when they feel like they have found the right person to spend the rest of their lives together. Having sex with someone is a very big deal and it's not to be taken lightly. Some people do it for pleasurable purposes only, while some wait until marriage to finally give themselves to each other."

"Have you ever. You know? Had sex?", Sonny asked.

"Well...uh...", This was kinda awkward I thought, "No, Sonny. I've never had sex. I've never been in love, so it's something that I've never really thought about actually", I answered, hoping that this would be enough to satisfy his curiosity, but I was wrong.

"Do you wanna have sex?", he continued.

"Talk about being direct!", I laughed, "But to answer your question, yes. I do want to have sex, when I fall in love and find the right person."

Sonny nodded, "I think I wanna have sex with Will."

"What?", I snapped.

"I said, I think I wanna...", Sonny repeated, but I cut him off.

"I heard you the first time, Sonny."

"Then why did you asked me again?", he was confused.

"Never mind. I was just surprised by what you said. That's all", I took a deep breath, "Did you talk to Will about this?", I asked.

"Yeah. Will said that he would wait until I was ready. I'm not ready yet, but I want to be. Will also said that we wouldn't have sex. He said that we would make love to each other. He said it wasn't the same thing, But I don't understand what he means by that", Sonny explained and looked as confused as ever, "He said that he never made love to anyone, like he wanted to do with me. He said it would be his first time too, because couples like us don't have sex like normal couples do."

"I think I understand what Will's was trying tell you, Sonny. And he's right. Same sex couples don't have sex like regular couples. It's a bit complicated, but it's still possible", I explained without going into details about the act itself, "I think what he was trying to say is that he doesn't want your first time with him to be just about sex. He wants it to be very special and meaningful. But most of all, he wants it to be about love. When you give yourself to another person for the first time, you must trust the other person completely before even thinking about doing something so special together. Because when It's over, you can't take it back."

"I trust Will. He would never hurt me", Sonny quickly came to Will's defense.

"I know, Sonny. I know. Will loves you so much, and I'm sure he would never do anything to hurt you, but...but promise me you will take your time and make sure you think this through before doing anything that you'll both end up regretting, okay?"

"I promise, Alex."

"Good! Well, I guess I should go talk to Will before he has a coronary, right?"

Sonny nodded.

"So, We good?"

"We good", he answered and smiled.

"I'll tell Will you're waiting for him, Why don't you draw him a picture of something while you wait", I suggested to keep his mind of the subject at heart.

Sonny got up from his bed and did just that.

(Alex's POV)

After talking with Jackson, I slowly made my way downstairs to Will. I took each step slowly, since I was still pretty uncertain as to what I was going to say to him at this point. Not that I had reason to be angry. It was obvious from my conversation with Jackson that he and Will talked through a lot. How could I possibly be angry with him when he was being so understanding and gentle with my little brother? Then why did I still feel a tiny bit of anger bubbling up inside of me? Was I just being an over-protective brother? I don't know. It did make me wonder what it would be like to have someone in my life that loved me as much as Will loves Jackson - Sonny. Maybe Joey was right after all: Maybe I was jealous of what they had together.

As I reached the living room, I noticed Will was fidgeting and pacing nervously. Before I had a chance to say anything, Will started talking, "Look, Alex. I know what you're thinking, but-"

"No, Will, I doubt you know what I'm thinking", I cut him off unceremoniously.

As much as I would like to tear into Will for what he and my brother have done together, I simply can't. Not after what Sonny said to me. Not after hearing that they genuinely seem to care about each other.

"Thank you", was all I said, leaving Will totally dumbfounded and confused.

"E-excuse me?", Will stammered his eyes and mouth open wide.

"I said thank you Will", I repeated.

"For what? I don't understand…", he asked as he stood across the room, still keeping his distance.

"For respecting my brother", I whispered. It wasn't easy to do that. Part of me just wanted to scream "he's my little brother! My sweet, misunderstood baby brother, Jackson, and he isn'tready for this…"But I knew deep down that it was me who wasn't prepared for this. I was still holding on too tightly to the boy he used to be but clearly wasn't anymore.

"Okay, but...I...I thought you'd be angry because of, you know?"

"Well, to tell you the truth, I'm not thrilled", I said honestly, "Especially because that could have been Dad at his door instead of me. But I'm not angry either."

"Really?", he asked obviously surprised by my reaction, "Why? You looked so angry earlier, Alex, and I thought for sure you were gonna kick my ass."

I let out a small giggle, "I can't deny I didn't think about it briefly, but Sonny and I talked. You know he wants us to call him Sonny now too?", I smiled and shook my head, "He explained things to me…how you are taking it slowly, talking through everything, going at your own pace, but Will? Can I ask something without making you too uncomfortable?"

I was unsure how to approach the subject. Love wasn't a topic we talked openly about very often in this household.

"I'll try, but I can't make any promises", Will fairly admitted.

I let out a breath before speaking, "Are you in love with my brother?"

Will gave me a questioning look, "Why are you asking me this?"

"Because I need to know, Will. I need to know that you're committed to him and to his needs. I just...I just need to know that you are, Will."

Will looked me right in the eyes, "I'll do anything and everything to make sure Sonny is safe and taken care of. I would never, could never, hurt him, Alex."

"I know that, but you didn't answer my question, Will. I need you to tell me straight up: are you or are you not in love with my brother?"

"I am in love with Sonny", Will didn't even hesitate before answering me.

"Okay...then what happens next?"

"What do you mean?", he asked.

"Well, what happens after graduation when this little 'assignment' is over? Where does Sonny fit into your life?"

There was a very long and awkward silence that surrounded us before Will finally spoke, "I don't know..."

"What do you mean you don't know?"

I was trying to maintain my cool, but it was a struggle.

"I don't know, alright? Graduation is still a few months away, and I can't possibly know what's going to happen between now and then."

I could tell Will was flustered, having to face this interrogation of mine.

"Okay, I get that, Will. But what about my brother? I don't want to be the bad guy here, but if you're not sure then maybe you should back away from him before it's too late."

"Too late?", Will spat at me angrily, "I love him for God's sake, Alex! How could I ever back away from him when he needs me the most?"

"Because I don't want to be the one who has to pick him up off the ground when you break his heart, Will."

Will paused, pressing his eyes closed, "I'm not gonna break his heart, Alex. I would never...I love Sonny so much…"

"Do you love him enough to make him your number one priority? Do you love him enough to stick around after graduation?"

Even though Will was getting emotional, I pressed on.

"What are you asking me exactly, Alex? Are you asking if I'm willing to give everything up for Sonny? Are you?", he moved closer to me and stood defiantly with his hands on his hips, "Then the answer is 'yes'. I would give up my life to make sure that he's happy, even if that means never leaving this hell hole of a place. I love Sonny, so very much and I can't ever see myself not loving him."

The gravity of Will's declaration almost physically knocked me over. I could see so clearly in his eyes the love he felt for my brother. God, I would love for someone to care about me that much.

"Well, I'm glad to hear you say that", I said, but I also couldn't help but think about what Joey said about me being jealous of Will and Sonny's relationship, "I want him to be happy, Will. He deserves it after all he's been through, and you're what makes him happy. But you gotta know where I'm coming from here. Sonny doesn't understand completely what he's feeling. We talked and...and he has questions; Questions that I don't have the answers to but did my best to help him make sense of. Honestly, I'm still worried."

"But why? What questions does he have and why hasn't he talked to me about them?"

"Like I said before, Will, he's new to all of this. He's never had these kinds of feelings for someone before. I know that you mean everything to him, but...", I stopped for a moment to make sure the words came out properly. "I feel that Sonny might be worried that he's not enough for you."

"What? Seriously? That doesn't make sense. Of course he's enough for me."

"Did you tell him that, Will?"

"Well, not exactly."

"Then you need to tell him. He needs to know where the both of you stand. Look, I'm not trying to tell you what to say to him or what to do, but you need to make things clear to him that you're here and you're not going anywhere. He needs to understand that you're not going to pressure him into anything, and most of all, he needs to know that you're not ashamed of him."

"Ashamed? Never! Wait - did he say something to you?"

"No, not specifically, but he did tell me that he's afraid that he's not enough for you. He doesn't want you to leave him for someone more 'normal'."

"Oh my god, that would never happen, Alex. He is enough for me. He's so much more than I could even ask for. I've never felt like this with anyone until him", Will finished quietly.

"Then go. Tell him that. Tell him what's in here", I said as I placed my hand directly over Will's heart. I could feel it beating rapidly. And then mine started doing the same thing. I quickly refocused, "You can make him understand, Will. Now go, before I really do kick your ass."

Will met my eyes and smiled genuinely, "Okay, I'm going. Thanks Alex. Thanks for caring enough to make me realize just how much I love him. He is everything to me", Will said as he hugged me.

I wasn't prepared for a hug, especially from Will. Was this really the guy I hated only months ago? It felt weird being in someone's arms like that…Will's arms...

"Okay, enough with the chick-flick moment! Go", I ordered as I gently pulled away from Will, not giving anything away, "Go make my little brother happy."

"Yeah, alright. I'll see you later", Will grinned excitedly as he waved me off, taking two stairs at a time to get to Sonny.

I took a deep breath as I watched him leave the room. Suddenly, I found myself alone, feeling empty, desolate. Geez, I was pathetic…and I was so screwed...

(Will's POV)

I thought a lot about what Alex said to me earlier, about what I would be willing to give up in order be with Sonny. As much as I wanted to get as far away from this place, I knew that deep down in my heart, waiting for Sonny would be so worth it in the end, cause we would both be truly happy together.

However, it's something else that Alex said earlier that really got me thinking.

"Sonny?", I asked, after a long break of silence.

Sonny lifted his head from his drawing and mouthed, "Yes?"

"Are you happy? I mean, with us?", I asked, "Do you like how we are together? Our 'romantic' relationship?"

Sonny looked quizically at me and cocked his head to the side, "What do you mean?", he finally asked.

"Like, the things that we do together. Are you happy with what we do?"

My words stumbled out and I had to look down to my hands to try to avoid any eye contact, out of embarrassment.

"I don't understand the question?", Sonny said as he slowly laid down his pencil.

He stood up and cautiously walked over to the bed, and sat down beside of me. His hand rested itself, as if by some sort of need, on my knee, and he squeezed it lightly. He nuzzled his nose into the crook of my neck, and took a deep breath, breathing me into his heart.

"Sonny, when couples are in love, they do things that we aren't doing. We have played around a little, but we haven't made love", I started, but he cut me off when he laid his amazingly soft hand on my cheek and pulled my head to his, forehead, to forehead and spoke.

"I make love to you every time I see you."

I looked into his beautiful chocolate eyes, and knew he didn't know what I was meaning, so to clarify, "I mean sex, are you happy with us not having sex?"

He kissed me again, "There are other ways to make love with each other than having sex. I'm just not ready for that yet", he shrugged.

"I love this man", I thought to myself, "I want you to feel safe with me Sonny, when the time comes and you feel like you're ready, I want us to share this wonderful moment together. What I'm really trying to say is that we're in no rush to do this, babe. I'm not going anywhere."

"You're not?", he asked almost surprised by my admission.

"No, babe. I'm not. And I don't ever want you thinking that you must have sex with me because you think that I might leave you cause that is never going to happen. I am never going to leave you."

Sonny smiled and pressed his forehead against mine, "I don't want you to ever leave me, Will", he said in a whisper.

"Never! I love you so much, that I feel like I could burst, or sing, or dance, or do all three", I said with a chuckle, "I just want to make sure you're just as happy as I am."

"Are you?" he asked.

"Am I what?", I said confused by the question.

"Really happy being with me, even when I say I'm not ready for sex?"

Does this boy really not know what he does to me every time he looks into my eyes? Every time he holds my hands? Every time he touches me or kisses me? Does he really not know the he holds my happiness in his eyes, his smile, his touch, his heart?, "Sonny, you take my breath away", I whispered as I leaned in closer to him, just close enough for my lips to touch his, "You make me feel like the luckiest man in the world, and I am so in love with you", I whispered into his lips.

He closed the distance and kissed me slowly at first, his mouth opening and closing in experienced rhythm. He broke the kiss and leaned his forehead against mine again, "So, you're happy?", I asked again, closing my eyes, afraid of his answer.

"Yes", he pecked my lips after that beautiful word for good measure, "Yes, I am happy with you."

He smiled that smile that makes me weak in the knees and I knew that I had found the man that I would love forever, "And I promise you, babe. Soon, I'm going to tell everyone just how much you truly mean to me. I just need a little more time, okay?"

I knew what I had to do...

I had to make a decision...

I couldn't keep making the man who I love feel like he's not good enough for me, because if there's anything, he's too good for me.

"Okay...", he whispered softly as we both laid back on bed and curled up into each others arms.

To Be Continued...OXO