A/N: I know you guys probably thought that I had forgotten about the stories but I promise I didn't. Apparently my work thought I would be a great training officer and was assigned an officer to shadow me. In turn meant I was no where near a commercial or had a moment to my self to plan or write out the chapter.

Alex strummed her fingers on the bar as she waited for the elevator to take her to her floor. Just as she was getting ready to leave for work she had received a call from Abby. She didn't think twice on seeing her number on the caller ID since the trial was set to start first thing Monday morning. Without a second thought she had answered the phone thinking that they were going to have a last minute session over the weekend. Instead what she got was the shock of her life. Abby was seething on the other end demanding to know what the hell was Olivia thinking by visiting Jess. At first Alex was positive she had heard her wrong. Why would Olivia visit Jess in jail. Then she had pointed out how she was staring at the sign in log herself. If Abby hadn't texted her an image of the sign in log she wouldn't have believed her no matter what she said. Now she was patiently waiting to find out exactly what was going through Olivia's mind when she pulled what had to be her stupidest stunt to date.

"What the hell were you thinking?" Alex yelled as she entered the apartment and slammed the door shut behind her seeing Olivia laying on the couch watching TV "Are you trying to set her free? Because of your stupid stunt she can walk free now and terrorize me even more. Is that what you wanted me living in constant fear?"`

"What?" Olivia asked jumping to her feet.

"Don't what me." Alex almost growled as she stormed toward Olivia "You know damn good and well what I'm talking about. You going to see Jess today. You of all people should know the value of staying away."

"What is that suppose to mean?" Olivia growled back.

"I mean I understand you have had two head injuries and had to recover odds that most people don't recover from but it affected your behavior not your damn memory. So please tell me what the hell possessed you to jeopardize a case and go and see the suspect when you're a victim yourself."

"It is impossible for that man to keep anything to himself." Olivia stated as she spun on her heels and headed for the kitchen.

"Oh Jesus don't tell me that Elliot was in on it too." Alex said following behind Olivia "We could play you off because of your head injuries but him there's no way."

"Wait El didn't tell you?" Olivia asked stopping and spinning on her heels so fast that Alex ran into her.

"No he didn't tell me." Alex said once she had gained her balance again "I didn't know till you just mentioned him. But did he drive you there? Was he right by you? Hell did he encourage this little escapade of yours?"

"NO he didn't drive me there or encourage me or anything else for that matter. He met me there at the end of my visit and if he didn't tell you how the hell did you find out."

"Hello you have to sign in when you see a prisoner." Alex growled as she watched Olivia spin on her heels and continue into the kitchen "It's a matter of public record now that you went to see her."

"It's the victim not the perp contacting each other so there's no witness tampering. You don't have to worry about that."

"Oh really so when the defense attorney puts you on the stand and asks you why did you visit his client. What will you say?"

"It doesn't matter." Olivia answered as she shrugged her shoulders.

"Yes it does." Alex stated as she slammed her fist down on the table "Why did you visit her? What will you say when her attorney asks you why did you visit his client."

"Leave it alone Alex." Olivia growled.

"NO I want to know."

"I went for you." Olivia shouted as she spun and threw the glass she had in her hand past Alex and against the wall "I went for you."

"Me?"

"Yes you." Olivia sighed as she took a deep breath and ran her fingers through her hair trying to calm her anger. "I wanted to get her to take the plea deal. Not make you have to tell everyone what happened to you. What she did to you."

"I'm sorry that it embarrasses you that I am a survivor of rape. I'm sorry that everyone will hear how weak I am. Everyone will know how I was treated and will look at you with sympathetic eyes because they know you are just taking pity on me. But you want to know something Olivia I'm not forcing you to stay here and right there is the door if it's such an issue for you." Alex said as she stormed out of the kitchen and started to make her way upstairs.

"You don't get it do you." Olivia almost shouted back as she grabbed Alex and pushed her against the wall "I didn't do it for me I did it for you. I don't want you to have to sit on the stand and have to relive every horrific thing that bitch forced you to do. Its not because I don't want anyone looking at me with sympathetic eyes as you call it it's because I want to protect you."

"Don't play the noble one." Alex said as she pushed her away and the tears started to fall from her face "You did your job just go. You don't have to pretend anymore. I'm sorry if you're ashamed to be with me or can't stand to touch me because of her."

"Damn it." Olivia growled as she grabbed Alex by the collar and pulled her to her "I'm not pretending and I stopped doing my job with you a long time ago. I'm not ashamed to be with you and I don't give a damn about what she did to you in the manner you are talking about. It doesn't change how I look at you or see you. I promise you it doesn't drop my level of desire for you any. There's not a moment that goes by that I don't look at you and have to fight the urge to jump your bones."

"Olivia please?" Alex pleaded as tears streaked down her face.

"Please what baby." Olivia whispered as she carefully wiped the tears that were falling from Alex's eyes

"Please don't do that again." Alex sobbed out.

"Ok but I need you to know and understand that I did it to protect you. Not because I'm ashamed of anything but because I will move heaven and earth to protect you."

Alex nodded unable to find her voice.

"Good." Olivia whispered in an even softer voice as she cradled Alex's face. She knew Alex didn't realize it but for the first time she referred to herself as a survivor and she didn't have a flashback no matter how heated their argument had gotten. Not only was that something that hadn't happened since her first injury but it was also a sign that the healing was beginning.