"If I thought I could get away with it I would wrap my fingers around Trevor Langen's throat and squeeze the life out of him." Alex said as she walked into her apartment and removed her coat. "He had some nerve to do what he did today."

"Alex he was only doing his job." Olivia said shutting the door behind her "You can't get mad at him for that."

"Really" Alex growled as she spun to face Olivia "He accused you of beating on me. He accused you of raping me and I can't get mad at him. I think you need to schedule an appointment with Dr. Mathews again. If you're defending him we need you re-evaluated."

"Alex let's face some facts here" Olivia said as she headed for the stairs "You and I both know all he needs is too put a little doubt in one jurors mind and he's done his job. By pointing out that I have punched the wall inches from you head and caused a bruise on your face is enough to do just that."

"That's all you have to say." Alex almost mumbled amazed to hear something to of that magnitude coming out of her mouth.

"Yeah it is." Olivia almost snapped as she stormed up the stairs and slammed the door.

Alex stood in the living room and took a deep breath. Olivia had been distant almost to the point of being rude since she took the stand. She knew what the issue was and had silently hoped and prayed that they could wait till after the trial to address it but like everything else in her life she wasn't that lucky. Taking a deep breath she headed up the stairs to have what was going to be probably one of the most important discussions that she never knew she needed to have with Olivia.

"You never once failed me." Alex said opening Olivia's door without knocking deciding to go straight to the point.

"Who are we kidding here?" Olivia growled as she punched the bag again grimacing at the pain that shot through her from the force of the punch. "I should have shot her the second she pulled the weapon on me the first time. We both know that New York has the statue where I do not have to give a warning or order if a weapon is pulled on an officer. I could have shot her, been cleared of it, and you would have never had to endure this, but I didn't."

"Olivia it's a normal reaction to not want to take someone's life."

"Really" Olivia said spinning in her spot to face Alex "Had I done it she would have never been able to get in here and torture you some more. Another prime example of how I failed you."

"Stop it." Alex ordered taking a step closer.

"Stop what, pointing out the facts." Olivia said jerking her gloves off her hand and throwing them on the bed.

"NO, BLAMING YOUR SELF." Alex screamed.

"Who else is there to blame?" Olivia asked as she closed the gap between them "certainly not you so that only leaves one person, me."

"No, the only person to blame is Jess." Alex said reaching out and placing a hand on Olivia's arm. She hadn't felt that much tension and anger radiating off Olivia in a while. She wanted to pull her hand away out of habit but she'd be lying if she said that she didn't enjoy, actually more than enjoy it to be honest it turned her on, knowing that she had the ability she had to calm Olivia with a simple touch. "Not you. Olivia I have never blamed you or felt as if you failed me. Not Once."

"Alex."

"Shut up and listen." Alex whispered taking a small step till she was almost pressed against the detective so she could whisper in her ear "If it wasn't for you I wouldn't be alive. I know without a doubt that she would have killed me that night she broke in. As much as I wanted to stay silent to protect you I knew if I didn't you would spend the rest of your life hunting her down and killing her. To the point that you would ruin everything that you have worked so hard for and you wouldn't have cared. I couldn't let that happen. So I screamed, I screamed to not only protect you from yourself but so that you could also save me from her. You did Olivia. You have saved me in so many ways and some that you will probably never know."

"Alex." Olivia choked out as she pulled back and stared into Alex's eyes. Every fiber of her being was telling her to stop but no matter what she pushed those voices to the side as she slowly leaned forward and brushed her lips across Alex's.

Alex moaned as Olivia slipped her tongued into her mouth and began dueling for control with her, something that she was more than willing to surrender to her. She ran her fingers through Olivia's hair and pulled her even tighter against her. It felt as if she could feel the detective's heartbeat through her clothing and their hearts was beating as one. Suddenly she had, no needed, to feel the detective's flesh under her fingers.

"Alex" Olivia said gasping for air as she pulled away when she felt her undoing her shirt. The blush covering Alex's cheeks and her kiss swollen lips almost broke what little restraint she had left.

Alex's hands were shaking as she pulled Olivia's shirt free and began unbuttoning it. Never in her life had her body been wound so tight by a simple kiss. She truly felt as if she would die if Olivia didn't touch her and knew without a doubt that she wouldn't last more than thirty seconds the second that she did.

"Alex" Olivia whispered again as she carefully took her hands in hers praying that it wouldn't send her into a flashback. As much as she wanted to push Alex against the wall and take her, oh hell who was she kidding, she would gladly shove her hands in Alex's pants where they stood and take her, she be damned if she sent her into a flashback because of it. Which is why, she quickly released her hands when she felt Alex struggling to against her.

Alex struggled to free her hands from Olivia's grasp and smiled when she was successful. Before Olivia could even register what was happening she had her hands back at Olivia's buttons and was once again attempting to make short work of them. She was almost to the last button when Olivia grabbed her wrists again.

"Alex." Olivia said a little more forceful as she grabbed at Alex's wrists again. "Alex."

Alex stopped and finally looked at Olivia. She smiled when she saw Olivia struggling to maintain control of not only herself but the situation as well. The simple thought that despite how bad she wanted her, and it was more than obvious in her eyes, she would rather kill herself than to push Alex past her point or into something that she wasn't ready for. That right there made what she wanted to do and say even easier.

"Make love to me." Alex whispered.

A/N: Yeah I know I am a tease but you guys love me right?