"Alex, I already live with you," Olivia said, sitting up and pulling Alex into a sitting position as well.
"I know, I mean permanently," Alex said, looking anywhere, but at Olivia, "I know you should be cleared for duty soon and I don't want you leaving. So, I was thinking I could buy out your lease and you move in here."
"No," Olivia said standing and starting to pace the living room, "I will not be a kept woman and I will not have you buying out my lease."
"I'm not saying you're a kept woman or you're going to be a kept woman," Alex explained as she watched Olivia pace the living room, "I'm just saying there's no need to go back to your apartment. I can hire some movers who can pack up your items and have them brought here."
"I'm not a kept woman, but you're going to hire a moving company to take care of my move, question, Alex." Olivia said as she stopped pacing and turned to look at her, "Am I going to live rent free here?"
"If you want to, I don't care."
"If I want to, you don't care," Olivia said, through clenched teeth as she almost towered over Alex, but stopped herself for fear of sending her into another flashback, "I'm not some charity case for you to take care of. I can pay my own way."
"Then, fine, pay me some rent," Alex stated, standing up ready to square off with Olivia if need be, "Honestly, I don't care. If it makes you feel better, you can pay me what you pay for your apartment."
"Please, I'm sure what I pay in rent doesn't even come close to what you pay monthly?"
"Actually," Alex said, smiling, "You pay more than I pay."
"How the hell do you figure?" Olivia asked, looking around, "You've been to my apartment; you see the size of it. Hell, I can probably fit my apartment in here at least twice, if not more, and you're going to stand there and tell me I pay more?"
"Yes."
"Really, is this some way to make me feel better for not being able to cover half the expenses? Tell the poor cop that you don't pay that much. Alex, I'm a lot of things and I know I have suffered some head trauma, but I'm not stupid or slow by any means."
"I never said you were or was trying to imply it either, Olivia," Alex said, taking a step closer to her despite the anger she could feel radiating off her, "You happen to be an extremely intelligent woman who doesn't give herself enough credit."
"Then, how the hell can you stand there and tell me I pay more in rent than you do?"
"Because, I bought this apartment."
"You what?"
"When I signed the lease, I had a purchase option," Alex explained, "I had originally signed a six month lease when I moved in. I wasn't sure if I was going to stay here or move from apartment to apartment. You know how it is when you are being stalked and harassed. I really liked the security features they offered, which at the time made me think she couldn't get to me. So, after my six months was up I purchased the apartment. The only monthly outgoing I have here is my utilities."
"So, what I pay the monthly utilities and we call it even?" Olivia asked.
"If that's what you want to do," Alex answered, smiling again, "I will be blunt with you, Olivia; I don't care what you pay or how much you pay. Hell, to be honest, I don't care if you never pay for anything as long as you are here with me."
"Why?"
"'Why' what?"
"Why is it so important to you for me to stay here?"
"Olivia, I love you," Alex whispered as she reached out and took Olivia by the hand, "Because I love you and I want you here with me."
"I understand that, I do," Olivia answered as she carefully moved a piece of hair out of Alex's face and tucked it behind her ear, "But what happens when you decide that I'm not the one for you? What about when you realize that what you really feel for me is gratitude, not love? What then? What am I suppose to do then?"
"What makes you think that what I feel for you isn't love?" Alex asked as the lawyer in her started to come out.
"Alex, there is no doubt in my mind that I love you. I've said it before and I'll say it again, I truly believed I started falling for you when I first shook your hand. I'm not saying that what you've been telling me is a lie either, please understand that. But this relationship was formed under extreme stress and a traumatic event."
"Olivia, both of our lives are filled with extreme stress and one traumatic event after another."
"You're right, but those traumatic events that we deal with is not our own."
"So, now you're telling me that I don't know what I feel," Alex said as she fought to hold back the tears and started for the stairs, "Glad I see how you feel now instead of later. I would hate to repeat the same mistake as I did with Jess."
"I'm not saying that," Olivia yelled as she grabbed Alex and pulled her back to her, "Alex, you have watched me take a bullet, not once but twice, for you and, believe me, I would do it again in a heartbeat. You, yourself have stated that you will be forever grateful and in debt to me for it. The last thing I want is for you to realize down the road that you were never in love with me and then stay with me because you feel as if you owe it to me."
"Olivia, please don't doubt what I feel for you," Alex pleaded as the tears started to fall from her eyes, "I have been in love with you for a while now. I was too scared to say or do anything because of Jess. It is because of what she did that I was finally able to let you know. If you want to take it slow, move back home when you're cleared, I will support you. I will always support you in whatever you chose to do."
"I'm not going to lie to you, I do like staying here. You do have me spoiled now and going back to my apartment doesn't look that appealing. Not to mention seeing a hot blonde that is an outstanding attorney everyday is one hell of a perk."
"But?"
"But, I really do think this is something we should move slow at and examine more."
"Examine how? I know what I want."
"I know you do believe me. We all know what you are like when you have your head and heart set on something, but let's be sure about this. We still don't know if I will be released to duty or much less be able to return to the force. Do you really want to be stuck with someone that you will have to care for, for the rest of your life?"
"If it's you, yes, I do."
"There is some chance that some moron on the jury will set Jess free."
"All the more reason to stay here," Alex pointed out
"What about my temper? What if, one day, I lose it with you, what then?"
"Olivia, if I had ever been terrified of you or your temper you would have never stayed in my apartment," Alex whispered as she cupped Olivia's face in her hands, "I would have hired around the clock nurses for you to have at your apartment or found an excellent rehab center for you to stay in till you were better. Even at your worse, I had never felt safer."
"How about a compromise?" Olivia said realizing that, no matter what she said, Alex would have a valid argument to combat it.
"What do you suggest the compromise be?" Alex asked, knowing that she was winning the battle.
"I want to wait and see what the doctor says."
Alex nodded even though she knew whether Olivia could work again or not, she wanted her there.
"If, and I do mean If, I move in nothing will become official till after the trial."
Alex nodded again.
"Lastly and most importantly, we discuss this with our therapists, both alone and then in a session together. We, well mainly me, need to make sure this is the best thing for you in your recovery and me in my recovery."
"I don't care what the doctor says about you working or not working, I am more than willing to wait as long as you want to before telling anyone you are living here permanently, and lastly I don't need a therapist to tell me this is the best thing for me because I know it is," Alex answered, "But if that's the compromise you want and need, you have it."
"Thank you," Olivia whispered as she pulled Alex to her and kissed her.
A/N: I hope everyone has a safe and happy 4th of July. I need to thank IBME for the therapy suggestion. I actually would have never thought of that but once I read your review I could see the need for it. Thank you so much for that.