Chapter Nine

Finding Peace

The tent flapped softly in the breeze, the noise gently pulling Valina from her slumber. Images flashed in her mind.

…Cullen slumped against the wall, the blade tumbling end over end through the air towards the rage demon, white hot pain in her side, her father crying…

Panic gripped her. She shot up, her eyes flying open. Her hand covered her rib instinctively, but she felt no pain. Her eyes easily adjusted to the darkened tent, and when she glanced down she saw only smooth skin. Her breathing slowed. She could faintly remember hearing her father's voice urging Malakar to help him. An ache had settled over her bones now, and when she pushed the covers aside she noted the new bruises on her skin beside faded ones left from Adamant. When she looked at her hand she found the skin smooth and healed: Dranus or Malakar had tended to her care. She wondered how long she had been out.

Valina grit her teeth as she stood. Beside the mat, some clothes had been laid out on top of her pack. She pulled on the soft leather pants and a lightweight tunic. She lifted her coat, disappointed to see the massive tear from the staff blade, but she knew it could be mended. As she hung it over the pack again she heard a soft ping on the dirt. She crouched, picking up the shining token. She brushed dirt from the face.

Cullen…

She tucked the coin into her pocket when she heard movement outside the tent, the scuff of quick moving feet and a deep voice.

'Please let me see my daughter.'

'I can't. She's still resting.'

'She's been unconscious for almost a day. I am worried.'

'She got stabbed, Ser. Even with magical assistance, it takes time to recover from a wound like that.'

'Don't you think I know that?' Dranus snapped, 'I'm the one that stabbed her.'

His voice remained even despite the mage's rising temper. 'It wasn't your fault.'

'Fasta vass. Vishante kaffas! Festis bei umo canavarum–'

'Dranus!'

'Sorry, Amatus, I just… this is my fault. I should have taken a knife to my throat the moment those creatures stepped on our land. I knew they would want to use me, but I had no idea what they planned and–'

Valina barrelled through the tent flaps, pushing past Iron Bull and into her father's arms. He caught her, a sob wrenching from him.

'Oh my sweet little raven, thank the Maker.'

Her arms tightened around his neck. 'This is not your fault.'

'I put you in harm's way.'

'Dad, what do you think I do every day?' she asked with a laugh, 'because as far as I remember, I've been doing that myself for a while. I'm just lucky enough you made sure I could get myself out of it.'

Dranus smiled at her. They reached for Amira, drawing her tight into their embrace. Relief welled in Valina. Her family was safe, her parents alive despite the depraved plans Corypheus had for them. But even as peace crept slowly through her mind, a spark of uncertainty awakened in her gut. She felt the token in her pocket as if it were burning to remind her of its presence.

She pulled back, looking at Bull. 'Where's Cullen? Is he okay?'

'Bruised, but still standing, which is impressive. Saw that damn demon throw him at the wall. I didn't think he was going to get up from it. He had a go at Cassandra about an hour ago when the Seeker made him stop pacing outside the tent,' he said, pointing past her, 'I offered to hit him with a stick, but he declined. He was chopping some firewood, last I saw him. He's been pretty shaken up.'

Valina glanced to her parents, and Amira squeezed her arm.

'Go, sweetheart. He'll be relieved to see you up and about.'

She kissed each of her parents on the cheek, giving them one last hug before she moved into the tree line. She could hear him chopping before she saw him, the steady crack of wood under the axe. She spotted a few felled trees, then a pile of freshly cut logs.

Cullen's back was to her, his bare shoulders heaving one last time. He swung down, embedding the axe in the tree stump he had been using as a chopping block, taking a break from his work. He wiped sweat from his face with the back of his hand, his shoulders rising and falling with his steady breaths, the muscles on his back dancing beneath his skin as he stretched. A massive dark bruise had bloomed across his back from where he hit the wall, and she swore she could see the imprint of the individual rocks of the cobblestone.

Valina approached slowly, her bare feet making no noise on the grass. He tensed when she placed her hand on his back, trailing her fingers gently over the darkened skin. He turned to face her slowly. Emotions washed over his face; his brow drew tight, his eyes wavering, but a soft smile soon lit his lips, only to be wiped away. He reached for her, dragging her into a crushing embrace, and she melted into his arms. His skin was hot, the musky scent of his body mixing with the earthy smell of the forest, soothing her worry.

He's safe…

Her arms wound around his neck, and he lifted her from the ground.

'Thank the Maker,' he said, pressing his lips to her neck, 'I've been so worried.'

'I was too,' she whispered, 'your back… it must hurt.'

He placed her on her feet, releasing some of his crushing grip. He cupped her cheek with his calloused hand, and she leant into his touch.

'It's nothing compared to what I felt when I saw you on that floor. Valina, I thought–'

'I'm okay,' she said, her hand covering his, 'I promise.'

He bent to touch his forehead to hers, releasing a ragged breath. Her nose brushed his, coaxing him to her lips. She savoured his kiss, savoured the warmth of his mouth, the softness of his touch on her face as if she were a treasure he was too afraid to break.

When she pulled back, she caught his tawny gaze. 'Come with me,' she said, taking his hand, 'I want to show you something.'

Cullen followed her through the trees absently, his gaze riveted on her. He savoured the way her dark hair shone in the light of the moon, the glint of her serpentstone eyes as she glanced over her shoulder at him, savoured the warmth of her hand as she led him through the dense trees. After a short walk, they reached the river's edge. In the distance, towards the mouth of the river, he could see the Voclain estate standing proudly in the darkening sky, stars beginning to twinkle around it. Valina released his hand, and he ached at the loss of contact.

'You took me to the lake near Honnleath,' she said as she walked closer to the river, 'remember?'

Cullen remembered every moment that they shared on that pier vividly, every smile, ever laugh. He remembered the surprise that had washed over him, knowing she had finally revealed a hidden part of herself to him, a vulnerable scratch in the heavy armour she wore over her emotions. He remembered the way she stirred his body, the heat of his desire; the need to hold her, to make love to her, had almost consumed his every thought. But most of all, he remembered the husky note in her voice faltering, the storm of emotions in her gaze as she stood before him - beautiful, vulnerable - and the empty smile she had forced onto her lips while he was silent and afraid, unable to even tell her how he felt.

Cullen stifled a cringe at the memory. 'I do.'

'This is my Honnleath,' Valina whispered, 'I used to come here when I needed to think.' She stepped closer to the water, dipping her toe into the lazy flow. 'I am grateful for my father. He did everything he could to ensure I had the ability to defend myself, but I was a teenage girl. I did so much training that sometimes it was nice just to come and sit here with a book and watch the water flow slowly past. I found peace here, something I struggled to find at home.' She crouched down, dipping her hand into the cold water, watching as it flowed around her wrist. 'I would come down here with mother in warmer seasons, too,' she said, feeling a smile quirk her lips, 'when it was too hot to sleep, we would come jump in the river in our nightgowns to cool off.'

She stood, looking back at him.

'This was your safe place,' he said as she approached.

'Just like the lake near Honnleath was for you.'

You are my safe place, he thought, captured in her serpentstone gaze.

Valina reached into her pocket, holding out the token he had given her just days before. Cullen shook himself from his thoughts, glancing down at the shining coin. He wrapped her fingers around it. 'It's yours, Valina,' he said, 'I… I know that, once this war is over, you'll want to… please, if there is any chance it can keep you safe...'

The smile on her lips faltered at his words. 'I'll want to what, Cullen?'

'I had never thought beyond this war, but I find myself thinking about the future, about…' He sighed, bringing her hand to his lips. He glanced down, closing his eyes for a moment as he fought for words. 'I have no right to expect you to...'

'Cullen, do you really have to ask?' She trailed her fingers over his jaw, drawing his gaze up. Her heart skipped at the soft smile that lit his lips.

'I suppose not.'

'You're not getting rid of me anytime soon, Amatus.'

His smile bloomed brighter. 'Good.'

Valina placed a soft kiss on his lips, smiling as she pulled from his arms. She slipped the token back into her pocket, stepping back towards the water. When she stripped her tunic his breath hitched, his hands clenching at his sides as she stepped out of her pants, throwing them. He caught them on instinct, his eyes melting to gold as she turned toward the river. He caught a growl in his throat when she freed her hair, dark strands cascading down her back.

Valina waded into the soft flow, the cold water soothing her weary limbs. She dipped her head under the surface, flicking her hair back. She smoothed it down, turning back to face Cullen. He clutched her pants tightly in his fist, his eyes blazing as they raked over her skin, warming her body wherever his gaze caressed.

'Are you going to join me, Commander, or would you prefer to watch?'

Cullen dropped the garment, untying his pants with shaking fingers. He kicked them off, wading in after her, the cold water sending soft shivers over his skin, but the sight before him had warmth curling through his veins. Although he was captivated by her beauty, his eyes still drifted over her skin, noting the bruises on her arms and shoulders. He had longed to hold her every moment she slumbered, to caress every inch of her sun-kissed skin, to reassure himself that she was safe. He trailed his hands over her shoulders, wishing he could wash the marks away. His brow drew tight as his golden gaze fell upon every new mark, every new bruise.

'The cold water will help,' she said, drawing him deeper into the lazy stream of the river.

'I know.' His fingers brushed over her ribs, his touch a warm brand on her skin. 'Maker's breath, I thought I was going to lose you. I nearly lost myself with fear. I felt like I was slipping again, but I… knew I didn't need the lyrium. I just needed you, Valina. I will always need you.'

'Cullen, I have imagined a future with you too.' Valina cupped his cheeks, pulling his head down. She felt a flutter in her stomach as love danced on her tongue, even though she was unafraid of the words she desperately wanted to say. She claimed his lips in a soft kiss, barely pulling away to whisper, 'I love you.'

'And I love you.'

As Cullen said the words, he felt his heart hammer in his chest so hard he thought it might burst through his ribs. He wrapped her tight in his embrace. His cheeks ached from smiling, and when he met her serpentstone gaze, he dived into the shining depths, finding heaven in her eyes. He claimed her lips, spinning her in the water, revelling in the euphoria that warmed his very soul. He had to fight for the strength to pull away if only to take another breath, if only to see the depth of emotions in her gaze.

'I know we still have a war to fight, but I promise you, Valina, we'll fight it–'

'Together,' she said, eliciting another smile from his lips which she could not help but match, 'Corypheus won't know what hit him.'

'Definitely. You could make another explosive entrance like you did at Skyhold.'

Valina smirked, a wicked glint in her eyes. 'That can be arranged.'

Cullen laughed, drawing her tighter against his chest. They sank further into the water, wrapped in each other's embrace, and Cullen felt his soul settle into the peace it had craved for so long.

…He sounds new, like echoes of laughter on an empty riverbed. Not for sailing, but safer…

To be continued in Part Two, Shadows & Daggers: A Warriors Captured Heart. The first chapter will be added to this story on Friday.