As Leo drove the Shellraiser down the subway track, he listened to his brothers babbling cheerfully. It brought a huge smile to his face. All of them—himself included—had almost been different turtles since April's suicide attempt. Now, it felt like the old days—listening to them banter, to Mikey being Mikey, Donnie as nerdy as ever, and Raph engaging in his favorite activity: picking on his brothers.

"Dude, it's gonna be so sweet to un-mutate all the crazy mutants that are running around! No more Squirrelanoids! They'll be cute lil' squirrels again!" Mikey crowed, for the fifteenth time.

"And Mr. O'Neil and Timothy—they'll be human, too!" Donnie said. It wasn't like him to repeat things the way Mikey did, but deserved to be excited.

"Wait—could this turn us into humans?" Mikey asked excitedly.

"No, shell brain," Donnie said, smacking his forehead. "It's a retro-mutagen. That means it undoes stuff. We'd just be regular turtles again."

Suddenly, Mikey said, "What's wrong, Raph?"

Leo glanced over his shoulder. Raphael was frowning.

"I could have Spike back," he muttered. "But—that would be wrong. He's got a mind now, like us. I wish—ah, forget it."

Leo was surprised. Raph had hardly talked about Spike in months. After Leo's last encounter with Slash, however, he thought that unmutating the monster he'd become wouldn't be such a terrible thing. But Raph was right. It would be wrong, no different than killing him, and perhaps worse.

"Whoa," Mikey said. "Dudes—I just thought of something."

Here we go again, Leo thought, waiting for the next batch of nonsense to come spilling out of Mikey's mouth.

"Master Splinter could be a human again."

The thought startled Leo so much he slammed on the brakes; the Shellraiser skidded to a halt. "What?"

The four of them exchanged awed expressions.

"I can't—I mean, Sensei is—well, come on guys, he's Sensei," Donnie said. "Do you think he wants to be human again?"

"Who wouldn't?" Mikey said. "I mean, we can't actually go to pizza places as mutants."

"Geez, Mikey, it's not like being a mutant totally sucks shell!" Raph snarled. He turned to Leo. "Why are we stopped, Leo? Let's go home."

Leo slowly started the Shellraiser. The thought of Splinter being human—it was joyful and profoundly upsetting at the same time. Splinter could have a real life again.

A real life without mutants and aliens. Without them.

Leo's stomach tightened. Splinter would never do that, would he? Human or mutant, he was the same person. But even if he stayed…Splinter being human, being able to have normal relationships with other humans…

Relationships.

Leo knew why Raph was so angry. It was the same reason that Leo had been so frustrated by Donnie and April's relationship. All of them, whether they admitted it as much as Mikey or not, wanted to see what it would be like on the other side of that fence. Being human meant being able to have a family. Having children. Being able to pass on the ways of ninjutsu to the next generation.

Raph was right—it wasn't horrible being a mutant. There were far worse things. But the thought of Splinter becoming a human filled him with fear and uncertainty—and envy.

So much envy.

"You know," Donnie said, "when I told Sensei that I'd figured out the retro-mutagen, he got this look on his face. I couldn't figure it out. I'm guessing that he's already thought of this, guys."

"But he hasn't said anything," Leo said, feebly grasping for something to convince himself that Splinter didn't want to become a human again.

Mikey spun around on his swivel chair. "Dudes, this is Master Splinter we're talking. He doesn't say anything unless it's philosophical and confusing."

"Well, I guess—I have enough to fix two or three more mutants before I need to make more," Donnie said thoughtfully. "I'll ask him if he wants me to give some to him. Wow. I bet that would actually make him really happy."

"Totally," Mikey said, his voice thick with awed envy.

"But—I mean," Raph sputtered, "this is Splinter."

"I don't really follow," Donnie said.

Of course Donnie wouldn't. Donnie probably liked the idea of being human as much as Mikey did, and liked the idea of Splinter being a human again as well. Donnie, who already had April…

Leo felt a pang of foolishness. Was he really this petty and vindictive? He glanced at Raph, and could tell at once that Raphael felt the same way that he did on the subject.

I'll add that to the list of three things that Raphael and I agree on, he thought. Now there will be four.

Hooray.

They didn't say anything else to each other the rest of the trip home. Leo couldn't wait to get out of the Shellraiser so he could go to the dojo and lose himself in peaceful thoughtless waves of meditation. He didn't want to think about any of this.

When they pulled up in front of the old turnstiles and got out, Mikey and Donnie ran ahead, cheering out their victory. Raph and Leo lagged behind; Raph refusing to make eye contact and Leo not necessarily wanting to pursue it.

Splinter emerged from the kitchen. "My sons," he said, smiling broadly. "What good news!"

Glad to hear it worked so well, aren't you? You just can't wait to leave us in the mutagen dust, Leo thought bitterly, immediately feeling foolish and guilty for thinking such a thing. This was Splinter, as Raph had said. And if they could count on anything from Splinter, it was loyalty to them.

"My place is with my sons!" Splinter had said in his final defiance against the Rat King.

My sons. Ninjutsu masters did frequently refer to their students as their children. Heck, Splinter even called April his 'child.' Leo vaguely wondered why it was that Splinter had never encouraged them to call him 'father.' Did he really think of them as his sons the way he thought of Miwa as his daughter?

Did he love Karai more than them?

He really needed to go meditate, and fast, before he lost it Raphael-style. This was more than he could take. He'd be able to sort it out when he wasn't as tired, when his mind was clear.

"This is indeed a joyous day," Splinter said, his smile not dissipating. "All of you—follow me."

Drawing a deep breath to steady himself, Leo joined the train and followed Splinter over to the entrance to Donnie's lab.

"See for yourselves," Splinter said.

Leo couldn't quite see, but then Mikey nearly jumped out of his shell with a triumphant whoop. "APRIL!"

Almost forgetting everything else, Leo joined his brothers in running over to where April sat. He thought his heart was going to explode with joy. His April—his sister, his best friend—she was back, she was back!

Like Raph and Mikey, he gave her a huge hug. "I'm so glad you're okay, April."

"Thanks, Leo," April said. Her voice was weak and shaky, but she was awake.

Suddenly, Leo realized that he, Mikey, and Raph were the only ones by April's side. He turned around, perplexed. Donnie stood several paces away, biting his lip, with his face twisted up with a mixture of sorrow and anger.

Donnie, you shell brain, get over here, Leo thought. Your girlfriend's awake.

Then, without saying a word, Donnie turned and ran from the room, slamming the door behind him.

April burst into tears.

Just when everything should have been simple—it kept getting more complicated.

I might need to meditate for a few dozen years.