Hey! Thank you for all the reviews.. I'm writing as fast as I can. So, we should be good for now. (Yup, is still darkish)

Enjoy!

M.

Chapter 3

"General O'Neill!" Somewhere from the group he was intended to join called over. He tried not to look so proud of himself as he turned around and nodded to the man who had called him.

"Ladies and Generals, gentleman…" He added politely. The group was varied, it contained a safe amount of high ranked officers, and their dates, and a couple of high end civilians.

"How are you General O'Neill? You been out of the loop for a while," the one who had called him over asked, his wife frowned in concern. If the concern was real or fake, he couldn't tell.

"I'm good. I've been just too busy," he added, trying not to grimace, this was it. This was the point where his wife used to be able to deter the most obnoxious of them all with her smile and charm. But he noticed the smirk on one of the civilian, the I'm better-than-you look and the gloating glint in his eyes. He had seen that face too many times before, after his experience with one particular place in the universe, that combination always made him remember of Ba'al.

"With… what was that you did?" He grinned.

"I'm in charge of the national deep space and radar telemetry office," he added seriously. Who would believe him that? He wasn't sure, but that was the dumb cover they still hadn't managed to change. His wife used to laugh at him for it.

"Really? Who in his right mind would believe I know what the hell is going on as a result of deep space and radar telemetry? And worse, that I direct it? I mean, the name alone doesn't fit with my profile!" He had complained.

"Well, you can always tell the truth…" She had told him and he snorted. She knew that wasn't close to what he did.

"The truth?"

"Yes, you annoyed your superiors enough for them to find the worst place they could find for you, flyboy," she winked and he laughed.

"You know, that might even work better"

He shook his head to get back the conversation, thankfully he wasn't out of it too long.

"I could tell you how damn fascinating it is," he started conspiratorially. The civilian inclined himself getting closer to Jack

"But you can't because it is classified?" He whispered back, knowing smile in place.

"Oh, no… I can't because I would be lying. I still haven't figured who was the one I've pissed that much." The Generals in the group chuckled, "But you know, I had a long career… maybe they just managed to agree that I needed this sort of punishment," he finished clasping his hands together, the man huffed something out of his breath and excused himself out of the group, but he was replaced by a girl. He was pretty sure she knew him from somewhere.

"General O'Neill, how delightful is to see you around," she commented with a sweet grin. "I've not seen you around in a long time, almost nine months since the last ball…" He inhaled deeply, he had stopped participating in the social life of DC, he only had come to three parties after his wife wasn't there anymore. There was no point, no one to dance with, no one to distract him, no one to protect him ... not this last year, not this year… not any longer. He gulped containing the tears that had threatened to appear, and tried to bring himself back to the present.

"Sorry, what did you say?" He asked, since she kept her eyes fixated on him as if waiting for an answer he never gave her.

"I was saying I remember seeing you on my first ever ball, and you were alone."

He figured then, why she had seemed familiar. After nine months of hoping, that day he had received the first blow that came cracking his reality, he had been introduced to her and then, he passed the whole night trying to avoid her. He knew the whole process was prolonged out of pity, but six months later they couldn't keep going anymore. And she was pronounced dead. Gone…

Hayes, trying to help him out, had ordered him to be there for a ball that same night. He knew the man was feeling guilty and he didn't know why, but he also knew Hayes was worried he would do something dumb.

Yes, he was disheartened, his whole life had turned for the worse again, and yet, everything she represented in his life made him unable to do anything but to sit tight and mourn. He remembered that day vividly, the day he understood she was not going to come back. He remembered how pained his eyes were from crying the whole darn morning, he remembered feeling the need to drown himself in alcohol or hide in the most darkened place he could find.

But he had duties to attend and using Amelia's recommendation, he had placed two tea bags of chamomile over his eyes and he seemed just like someone who had an awful day that night. But he wasn't willing to stay in a group or socialize when he could barely speak without breaking. So, that night he had hid in a corner of the grand salon and when one waiter had passed by, he had grabbed two glasses of champagne out of custom. Since, she always made her bests efforts to be there whenever there was a party he was ordered to, and he had turned around to remember she wasn't there with him, she wouldn't be there any longer, she was gone.

He remembered the burning feeling of missing air as the tears pushed themselves out, even if they hadn't actually left his eyes, and trying to find his breath, he had pushed the extra glass to somewhere. It was this girl.

He couldn't even remember her name, because all he could think was that she was gone. He couldn't shake the feeling of complete solitude even if the girl had talked incessantly the whole night. The only thing he knew was that he kept drinking glass after glass trying to forget. Then he thought he saw his wife, and had blinked furiously, finding the girl still there. He had ended that night, excusing himself and walking home. Yes, walking... because getting to their home was the last thing he wanted to do, getting home to the emptiness that would accompany him to the end of his days wasn't something he was looking forward to.

He still couldn't spend that much time in that house, her things still hang in her side of the closet. Her stuff was still laying around and taking space in the bathroom. Her coat was still hanging in the closet at the entrance.

"We were re-introduced a week later, and you were alone again…" she continued, "I asked around about you, General… my father assured me you were married."

"Yes," he clenched his jaw.

"I don't remember ever meeting your wife? Is she around?" She asked innocently, that sensation of being a worm waiting to be eaten grew up on him again, the pain of thinking of her made him take a deep breath. He cleared his throat.

"You don't remember her, because you haven't met her. Believe me, she's not someone you would forget easily," he finished with a sad half grin.

"Will I meet her tonight?" She added with a smile, he couldn't define for sure as mischievous or seductive… not that he cared for either.

"No"

"It's that because you just pretend to have a wife, to avoid all the single ladies out here to come and look for you?" she chuckled, and the part of the group who didn't know giggled with her. While the other half, only looked immensely uncomfortable.

"No," he almost growled.

"So she left?" She asked out of the blue, he clenched his jaw tightly, "Oh, your reaction tells me I'm correct. Come on, General," she smiled, placing her hand over his chest, "it's been what… ten…twelve months since I was first introduced to you? And you are still alone…" she pouted, "you are an attractive man, you must allow a woman to find you," she batted her eyelashes, and drew slowly her hand down until it was softly over his arm. He pulled his arm away as politely as he could. "And, you know what they say," He didn't and something told him he didn't want to know, "one nail drives out another"

"What is it with people trying to pair me up with someone? Hmm? Let me assure you, I don't need a nail … or a girl… or whatever you are trying to oh no so covertly achieve here." He huffed waving his hand between him and the almost non-existent space she left between them. "Geez! I'm here because I was ordered to. I'm not here to try and pick someone as, apparently, some people think. And what if it's been eight, ten or twelve months and you haven't seen me with anyone? I don't know you… you don't know me, and I should feel flattered you have decided I was worthy of your attention, but I will appreciate if you keep your distance from me, and I will sure as hell do the same!" The girl turned a bright red, and the Generals were looking at him as if he had lost all his marbles at once.

"General O'Neill," a female voice came from behind his back

"What?!" He lost it, he was tired of fencing with girls. Or women… even with Generals who knew quite well what his current situation was and pretended not to.

"Ah, they brought your wife up, I guess?" he turned around, and blinked. Several times... "I'm sorry, General, I just found out about it, I could have imagined, but…" she trailed, she was completely loss of words. The way he was looking at her making impossible for her brain to pick up anything else but his eyes. If it wasn't for all the other people around, he would have pinched himself. But she was there and he couldn't utter a word.