Sorry I haven't updated in while, been really busy with school and stuff. Thanks to Jayd Marie for reviewing! You rock thank you so much.

-True Goddess

Chapter 10

If I could find out how
To make you listen now
Because I'm starving for you here
With my undying love

Raven's POV

I shivered on the ground, naked and vulnerable. I felt the sticks digging into my sides. But I couldn't feel, I was just so empty.

I felt nothing without the wolf. I had nothing without the wolf. Now I was empty, a shell of whom I was.

I was barely a wolf.

Now I'm back to average me. I felt my bones shrink back to my old height. I screamed in pain as my bones rearranged themselves.

Paul held me in his lap and rocked with me on the floor as I sobbed into his shoulders.

I shook and cried for three nights as my body got rid of everything that made me who I was. The pain it was unbearable, feeling my bones weaken, my spine shrink back instead of elongating. Phasing didn't hurt at all compared to this feeling the wolf spirit die inside myself.

It was the worst pain possible, literally a part of myself is dying.

I woke up with the pain gone and only a memory of it.

I looked out the window and sighed, I haven't left my room since I came back.

I was too angry to leave, I could have prevented this from happening. I shouldn't have let my anger get to me, I should have listened to them. But I was too stupid and too naive to listen. Now I'm going to lose everything.

Now I couldn't be with Paul, one day I'm going to die. I know he can give up the wolf but I see how much he loves it. The feel of the run, escaping into another body.

It' the escape I miss, it used to make me feel powerful. But now I'm so vulnerable, any little thing can kill me.

I hear the door open and Paul walks in.

"Come on you have to eat."

I glare at him and he just sits next to me.

"You're going to starve."

I stare back at him.

"So… I'm the weak human again! You should hope I die!"

Paul growls at me quietly.

"Never say that again."

I sigh, not promising anything.

"Paul that was the only thing in my life that made me feel alive again. Now I-I might have to go back to him…. And I don't want that. I'm scared Paul."

He pulls me to his chest and I inhale his scent. It was the only thing I kept from being a wolf, my scent is better than most humans.

"Hey we love you, and were going to protect you."

I look up at him and he leans down and kisses me. I sigh and wrap my arms around his neck.

"Are you going to ea…"

Renesmee trailed off and we separated quickly.

"Yea I'm going to eat."

I say blushing fiercely.

"I'm going to."

Paul says taking my hand and we both make our way downstairs.

I sit at the table and instantly hate how everyone is trying to make everything feel normal. Like giving me a mountain of food like they did for the rest of the wolves.

I pushed it away after eating a quarter of it, my human body could never eat that much.

"I'll take the rest."
Paul says barely above a whisper.

I nod and let him finish.

"I need some air."

I say walking out of the house blocking my thoughts carefully knowing Edward's listening.

I take off into the woods and run. I'm not as fast as I used to be, but I was a fast runner even as a human.

My feet hurt terribly because I didn't bother to put on shoes, but I didn't care. My lungs were burning and my legs ached. I realized I made it to the treaty line. I crossed it onto Quileute land and continued running, I didn't know where I was going.

I couldn't control my own body any longer. I saw the woman who stole the wolf from me smiling.

I glared at her and took a step closer.

"You want the wolf don't you?"

She asked.

She closed her eyes and a blue smoke came out of her mouth. A tall beautiful wolf with raven black hair and forest green eyes stared back at me.

I jumped for it and fell off the cliff in La Push.

I don't know what's up with me and cliffs but I seem to use them a lot.

Anyway please review and tell me what you think.

Thanks,

-True Goddess