Yes, yes, I know... I'm still missing the when/what/where... but I need to take them out of that gala and then we can all talk quietly... or something like that...

Chapter Eight

The room was dark, only a small glowing light came from the outside. On the bed, a small form breathed in and out laying sprawled, without a care in the world. He walked inside slowly in a trance like way. The soft breathing sounds attracting him to the little person Sam had just introduced, or tried to.

Sam.

He looked at her and she was still by the threshold, the hallway light casting a weird shade over her. But he could still see by her position that she was nervously chewing her thumb; something he had seen her do whenever the pressure was extreme. She was frowning and her breath was being held. He nodded at her in trying to make her at least breath, she gave him a nervous smile and exhaled, closing her eyes to get in control of herself. Yes, he might have a few inklings of who was the kid and she knew it.

Hearing now she too was breathing, and moving. He turned around and resumed his walk. He heard the door closing and stopped for a minute, the sound of it too loud for the silence surrounding them. He stopped for a second, checking that the little thing didn't wake up.

"She won't wake up. She sleeps through the night…" he looked at her in wonder, he knew she had nightmares, both of them had. Hell! Probably the whole military force who had seen the horrors of wars had those. And those were loud… remembering horrors in dreams, was never quiet. She smiled self depreciative, "yes, even if I don't."

He nodded, he still couldn't find his voice… too many options, too many horrors. And then it hit him, 'she'. He closed the final steps and looked at the now clearly defined girl. He could see her little, very tanned, arms free from the bed sheets raised awkwardly above her little blond head. Her face was turned to the side and he thought he just might have seen the cutest little thing. Her pouting lips were so familiar to him that it was painful.

"It's not … she's … " Sam attempted again. "See, this is why I didn't want to talk yet. I can't find my words right. And, supposedly, I've had those ready for forever now."

"She's beautiful, Sam," he told her, his finger slowly tracing the contour of Naysa's face. Sam's eyes filled with unshed tears.

He turned around, conflicted with his own feelings. Even if the kid wasn't his…he knew it was Sam's and he knew she must have been through hell to bring her, to raise her. He knew Sam enough to comprehend she would never get rid of a child, even if it wasn't his. Oh, people often told him he was a pessimist, but truth was, he always liked to paint the whole picture… and in this picture, it didn't look that good, not for him, not for her.

"I wasn't raped," she managed to say, after seeing all the expressions passing through his face. And then, she saw it, the pain. The feeling of utter betrayal. "Don't you dare, Jack O'Neill!" She almost growled, "don't you dare to believe not even for a second, that I would betray you on my own free will… not after all we've been trough"

"I didn't say a word"

"But you thought it. I still can read you, just like you can read me…" she sighed, "Jack… I wasn't raped. I don't know, I'm not sure how or why it happened just when it would complicate things for me the most, but," she rubbed her head, "I guess the treatment I went through when I was here, finally worked…"

"I don't understand…"

"They named me Malachi, some called me Neria…" she added, in a tone of voice that clearly detached her from the situation, "I learned later that those mean messenger of God, and Angel of God…they called me like that, because, I 'fell' from the skies." She licked her lips, he knew sharing this with him, even if was just a few bits, was costing her a great deal, he walked closer to her to find a way to reassure her, but he didn't really know what to do. "When, it was obvious I was carrying her, they started to call her Naysa. It translates like miracle of the Goddess or something close to that," she gave him a half smile and reached for his hand. He quickly took it and gave it a small press, to show her he was there for her. "They thought, I was a savior of sorts… even if at that moment, I could barely save myself"

He knew by the way she was looking at nothing at all, she was remembering. He didn't understand what exactly, but he knew it was something from the past twenty months since she was lost.

"Do you see?" she stopped and asked him.

"I… I'm not sure, I'm following you, Sam," he added softly. She crooked her head and sighed when his palm contacted the side of her head. "But I'm listening, I'll listen to you my whole life"

"Remember before I went? When I was still attached to the White House, and to the SGC and to Nellis?" he frowned, "when we were planning?"

"Yes… what…"

"We were planning, remember? And, I saw that glint of hope when we talked about it, so I went to a facility. And started a medical treatment to help me get pregnant, apparently, it worked."

"Wait, are you seriously telling me… she's mine?" he asked looking back at the girl. Sam nodded once, biting her lower lip. "She will be one soon, I will know exactly when the moment I finish calculating where I was when she was born."

He debated with himself for a moment, he didn't know for sure if he wanted to embrace her; or to wake up the tiny piece of himself from her dreams; or if he wanted to know more and ask everything that he was missing; or if he wanted more time to process the whole thing. He scrubbed his face, not over two hours earlier, he was just a man trying to go by and hoping for a miracle and now, he had two. Sam was alive, and they had a daughter. Then he looked at his wife, the nervous way she was suckling her lower lip, the small frown of concern. And his heart took over in a blink of an eye.

He grasped the hand he had in his, and tugged it strong enough to bring Sam's body in a collision course with his. He wrapped her in a tight embrace and he kissed her. Somehow, she had made it… and she needed reassurance they would be okay, and he just needed her to be okay. The rest was logical for his heart. Even if his mind took a longer time to understand it.

When the need for air became stronger than their need to get reacquainted with each other's lips, they came apart panting lightly and resting forehead to forehead. He closed his eyes and raised his head, chuckling.

"You are amazing, you know that, right?" he told her in awe; then he planted a kiss on her head. "When? How did you know you were pregnant?"

"Well, I did mention the whole thing was weirdly managed, right?" He nodded.

"I figured you didn't know when neither Teal'c nor Daniel, knew about the chance of me having her."

"What do you mean? Why they should've known?" he frowned.

"There's something odd, in this whole thing. When I reached Atlantis, I first thought the nausea and dizziness had come from the travel and adjustment. But, then… after the second month, I couldn't blame it on it any longer, it couldn't be the food either… so I went to the medical bay… Jack, they knew… it was appointed on my Air Force record… they knew I was pregnant, they knew I was coming back. I was scheduled to return, four days after the mission."

"What the…"

"I couldn't be changed out of it, because of the knowledge required. But it was supposed to be a quiet one; I should've known better due to the result of our quiet missions as SG1… reality was, I was …" she sighed, and pinched the bridge of her nose, "I wasn't paying that much attention to the details, I wondered since the whole thing happened, if it was my fault. If I could've done something to change the outcome… I wondered if I was the one to blame, because I was with my mind in her, I was thinking of seeing you again, and going to medical checkups with you, and rearranging the spare bedroom as a nursery."

"Oh… Sam"

"I needed you to know, I told them that I needed you to know about her. They told me, that's all I'm supposed to let you know until the meetings and reviews happen, Jack… I'm sorry"

"Who's they?"

"All of them… I know, Hayes did his best to try and bring you into the loop, I know he tried to make them understand you needed to know, but sometimes, not even he can pull that far. We should go back to the party, then you can leave"

"You want to return there?"

"No…" she shook her head, "I want to be here with you, but if we stay longer, they will come searching. We should go back and at least, enjoy we have each other tonight," he nodded, "I should probably fix my makeup first." She grinned and disappeared behind the bathroom door.

He walked again to the bed, the soft glow of the moonlight, allowing him to see the little one. HIS little one. There were many things in desperate need of explanation, he wanted to know everything that had happened, everything that had led to him not knowing his own daughter. Everything that had kept him away from his wife and mourning her…

And then the bathroom door opened, and he turned around to find her smiling at him from the threshold and he knew, he didn't really need all those answers, as long as they both were back with him.