You adjusted your sleeves, making sure the bandaging was covered completely. School had been getting more and more stressful, and you finally snapped. It wasn't too bad, just three or four cuts this time. You've had worse, from yourself and from your adventures Underground.

Sans knocked on the bathroom door, reminding you to eat breakfast before you leave. You were staying with Sans and his brother because as much as you loved Toriel, you couldn't stand being coddled and smothered.

You open the door and flick off the lights, adjusting your sleeves again out of habit. Sans was starting to walk away, but saw you fidget with your shirt. The lights in his eyes narrowed a fraction before he continues on his way.

Papyrus had made a simple breakfast this morning, no one really had time to eat anything fancy due to their schedules. You ate your eggs happily, the warmth welcome with the approaching winter. The brothers haven't quite understood the idea of using the central heating because they couldn't really feel the cold themselves.

Slinging your bag over your shoulder, you flinch a little as the strap catches on your arm. Sans made a noise but you rushed out the door before he could say anything. Maybe it was a mistake to live with Sans. You forgot how close attention he pays to everything.

School passed by in a blur, as it had been the past few weeks. Your lunch, so carefully prepared by Paps, tasted plain. Your mind drifting off in class more than ever. You were sure the teacher was going to scold you for day dreaming, but maybe they saw the look on your face and thought better of it. Either way, you were beyond happy when the final bell rang.

The walk home was awful, your exhaustion making you swerve on the sidewalk a little. By the time you threw the door open, your eyes were drifting shut. You tossed your bag by the door and called a faint hey to Papyrus before grabbing a blanket and curling up on the couch.

Even though the television was on, you fell asleep almost instantly. You didn't know why you were so tired lately, you had been going to bed at the same time and eating the same kind of food, but for some reason you were exhausted after coming home from school. You must have slept for a good two hours before the front door closing woke you up.

Sans gave you a guilty smile as you sat up to look at him, you rubbing your tired eyes with the back of your hand. He waved and picked up your bag with a smirk. He teleported it to your room, knowing both of you were too lazy to walk it up right then.

"Sorry to wake you up Kiddo." He came over and pushed your legs aside to make room on the couch for him to sit. You pick your legs up for the sole purpose of putting your feet on his lap after he sat down. He chuckled and pulled some of the blanket over his lap.

"How was work?" You were a little more awake now, arching your back and stretching. Your back popped loudly, making Sans cringe.

"Boring, as usual. I would ask how school was but…"

"It was boring, as usual." You said at the same time, smiling at each other. You settled back down into the couch and watched the TV in comfortable silence.

"Hey Kid… you'd tell me if something was bothering you, right?" Sans was looking straight ahead, at the TV, not at you, but his voice sounded like he was talking to a dangerous animal.

"Yeah, of course I would." You didn't let your guilt over lying seep into your tone.

"Like… if anything at all is botherin you… I'm always here for you. You can trust me with anything."

"I know Sans." You smile and bump his shoulder with your own, hoping to get him off this topic. He seemed to accept your answer and hummed quietly, settling back onto the couch. You were glad the conversation was over, but you had a sinking feeling he wasn't done with the topic completely.

"Why are you home so early, Human?" Papyrus – who still thought Human was a nickname for you – questioned as you walked thought the front door an hour after you left for the day. Your face was sticky with tears, and he instantly rushed to your side. "Oh my goodness! Please, tell the Great Papyrus what is bothering you so!"

"We h-had an assembly this morning… Alex k-killed himself last night…" Saying it out loud made your tears renew. You were never super close to Alex, but you did sit together at lunch when no one else would and he came over for dinner once or twice when you were paired together for a project last year.

Papyrus' face dropped from concerned to despondent. He opened his jaw as if to say something but closed it with a click. Instead, he just pulled you into his arms and let you cry into his shirt. It amused you at first, seeing the skeletons in such casual clothing, but now it was normal for you.

You cried into him shoulder for what felt like hours, muttering random things.

"If I was a better friend, if I had bothered getting to know him more… maybe I could have saved him… but I didn't and now he's gone forever… It's my fault he's gone… I should have been a better friend…" You were rambling, you knew that, but it felt good to get it out of your system.

"It is not your fault, dear one. There was no way you could have known what Alex was going to do. You cannot blame yourself for this." Papyrus comforted you, rubbing your back as your breathing finally returned to normal. "Go sit on the couch. I will make you something hot to drink."

You do as he says, numb. You sit on the couch, not really feeling the cold biting into your toes. Your last conversation with Alex played through your head.

"You can't keep doing this to yourself."

"I know Alex… but it helps…"

"I know it does but… there are people who care about you." He put extra emphasis on 'you'.

"People care about you too Alex."

"Hehe I suppose…." He hugged you tight, gently holding your wrist so you knew he wasn't mad at you.

Two days later, Alex was dead. If he had waited one more week, one more day even, you might have gotten close enough to him to save him…

Papyrus handed you a hot mug, snapping you from your flashback. His face was still somber, but he tried to smile for your sake.

"I have called Sans, for I know how much he comforts you." He did what he thought was best, but Sans was the last person - or monster - you wanted to deal with right now. You placed your mug aside and ran up to your room, slamming and locking the door.

You didn't want to cut, but the urge was just too strong. You managed to make two whole cuts before a strong hand gripped your wrist painfully. You turn frantically and come face to face with two dark eye sockets and a terrifying grin.

"Don't worry Sans… everything is fine Sans… I trust you Sans…" He ground out the words in a sick impersonation of you.

"S-sans…" Your voice was as watery as your eyes.

"You think this is nothing?" He lifted your wrist to your face, his own boney fingers covered in crimson.

"I… I-"

"I can't believe you! I can't believe you didn't trust m-me!" A tear dripped down his cheek but he angrily wiped it away with his free hand. "I THOUGHT YOU TRUSTED ME! I TRUSTED YOU!"

"S-sans you're hurting me…" You whimpered, genuinely afraid. He let go with a jerk and stood up. With the flick of a wrist, your blade was gone. Looking up, you realized your door was gone too. You went from sad, to afraid, to angry.

"This is for your own good, Kiddo." He stood on the other side of the door, out in the hallway, his left eye glowing blue. You tried reaching out to him only to have your hand meet an invisible door. You stared at him incredulously. "You're under house arrest Kiddo. No leaving your rom unless to go to the bathroom. We'll bring you meals."

"S-sans I'm sorry." You tried to reason with him, but the barrier didn't budge, and neither did the skeleton. His eyes were dark as the night and his grin anything but lighthearted.

"I'll bring you some lunch and bandage your arms. Don't try to escape." He turned on his heel and walked away, not listening to your blubbering. How had this day gone so wrong… first Alex and now Sans…

A sob ripped its way from your throat. Rushing to your bed, you curled up under the covers, not caring if the blood smeared on your sheets. You thought you had cried yourself out after finding out about Alex, but you were wrong.

You heard voices from downstairs, and you strained your ears to hear them.

"I am worried brother… did you now hear what happened today?" That was Papyrus, no doubt. You couldn't hear Sans' response, but you heard dished clinking together. "Her friend Alex, the one that came for dinner that one time? He had killed himself. That is why she came home upset…"

"What?" You could hear Sans' response now.

"I cannot understand why she would hurt herself, but I can understand why she would be in great emotional distress." More mumbling from Sans, then footsteps. You buried your head under your pillow and hoped Sans would leave you alone.

A soft blue glowing filled the room as the force field was taken down. A weight sat on the bed, jostling you.

"Sit up Kid." Sans' voice was softer now. You sat up, not wanting to upset him anymore. He took your arm and wiped it down with a wet cloth before wrapping some gauze around the wounds. When he was finished, he handed you a plate with a grilled cheese and cucumber slices. "Eat up. Papyrus made you your favorite."

"Am I still grounded?" Your voice was weak from crying. You didn't want him to know you were afraid of him.

"Yeah. At least until we know you're not a threat to yourself…"

"Please… I want to go to school…"

"The school called about an hour ago. The counselor said you had a week grace due to the tragedy. I figured you wouldn't want to talk to a human, so I called Alphys over. She'll stop by tomorrow after breakfast, and you're going to talk to her about all this." You could hear the bitterness in his voice.

"I don't wanna talk to Alphys…" You muttered though a bite of grilled cheese.

"Well you obviously don't want to talk to me so I don't know what to tell you." His voice hardened and you felt a thousand times guiltier.

"I'm sorry…" You whimper, tears threatening to spill over again. He sighs next to you and slumps his shoulders.

"So am I kid… so am I." He took your empty plate and stood, his knees popping with the motion. Sans walked out of the room, letting his eye flare blue as a sheen covered the empty doorframe again. He finally looked at you, making a choking noise in the back of his throat. "I'm doing this because I love you. You understand that right?"

You hesitate, which causes Sans' shoulders to slump even more, before nodding slightly. He nodded back, showing he saw you and turned away.

You woke up the next morning to a knock on the front door. It was amazing how much you could hear without your door there blocking the noises out. A stuttering hello told you Alphys was here. Dread pooled in your stomach, and you hoped burying your face in the sheets would make them think you were still asleep and leave you alone.

Someone knocked on the doorframe and the blue glow told you the wall was gone from the doorframe. Someone sat on the edge of the bed, but you ignored them. You could tell it wasn't Sans or Papyrus, and that left one person.

"L-look I, um… I know this isn't the e-easiest thing to t-t-talk about but… y-you really have to every o-once in a while… and um… I, um, k-kinda know what y-you're f-f-feeling so…"

"I don't want to talk." Your voice was muffled by the sheets. Alphys sighed and placed a hand on your arm.

"Y-yeah… I figured you w-wouldn't but, um, you kinda h-have too."

"What's there to talk about? My friend killed himself and I could have prevented it. I cut myself and Sans found out, now I'm grounded. There, can I go back to sleep?"

"Um… t-that's a good start? But it's n-not enough to r-r-really um… help you. Let's s-start with your f-friend?" Man, she was good at this, wasn't she?

"My friend Alex? He killed himself… and if I had been a better friend I would have been able to save him, but I wasn't a good enough friend. He never told me anything was wrong… he had just found out about my cuts and then he went and left me…"

"S-so you feel betrayed?"

"Yeah… If he had just given me one more week… I might have been able to talk him out of it. I might have been able to help him, but now it's too late. He shot himself in the head and left me alone…"

"D-do you um… really feel a-alone?"

"I don't have any friends at school. I'm not very good at talking to strangers, so I never made any friends. I only knew Alex because we sat together at lunch when all the tables were full."

"Is this w-what sparked you to h-h-hurt yourself?"

"Yeah, I suppose. It just… helped me think clearer." You sat up more, leaning up against the wall. You looked at Alphys for the first time and saw she didn't look nervous like she normally did. She was in her element now.

"N-now, why did you p-p-push Sans, um… Sans away?"

"I didn't want to disappoint him… He always treated me with respect. He didn't treat me like a child, like Toriel did. I love Toriel, I really do, but Sans treated me like a peer, not a kid. But I ruined that, didn't I? Now he'll never respect me. He'll never trust me again…"

"Maybe you should… erm… try t-talking to him? I, um… it took a l-long time for me to open up t-t-to Undyne, b-but after I felt so m-much better… about m-myself."

"He hates me now…" You finally let the tears flow again. You honestly thought he hated you now, and the thought made your chest hurt.

"W-what? No! N-no he doesn't h-h-ate you! The opposite r-really. He, um… he's d-doing this because you s-scared him… he t-thought, um… thought you were g-going to k-k-kill yourself too…"

You never knew Sans felt that way… You suddenly felt awful for making him so afraid. You pulled your knees up to your chest and buried your face in your knees.

"How can I make it up to him?"

"Well, you can promise me you won't do that to yourself anymore." Sans was leaning against the doorframe, the lights in his eyes soft and his grin almost guilty.

"I…" You didn't think you could make a promise like that, and he must have picked up on your internal conflict.

"How about this kid, promise to come talk to me whenever you feel like doing that again."

"O-okay. I promise." You figured you would be able to keep that promise.

"See? That w-w-wasn't so bad, w-was it?" Alphys was smiling warmly at you, and you couldn't help but smile back.

She said her farewells a little while later and left, the silence slightly deafening. You were left sitting on your bed, the barrier on the door down.

"Don't ever scare me like that again…" Sans was sitting next to you on your bed.

"I'm sorry…"

"So am I. I overreacted but… I don't know what I would have done if anything happened to you." He let out a shaky sigh and you wrapped your arms around him in an awkward but loving hug.

"I'm sorry Sans."

"I love you Kiddo. You can't leave me like that."

"I won't Sans. I love you too." You smiled at him and kissed his forehead. He grinned back and tickled your side a little, letting you know everything was okay between you two again.

I feel good about this one too! I also feel good about update twice already tis break! I'm keeping up with the every other day thing. I'm starting to chip off some of the requests, but it's still taking a long time. Thanks everyone for the support!

I know I keep writing the reader as a girl, but since I am too a girl, I relate best with a girl reader. I have some chapters where the reader will be a boy, and more where the reader will have no gender, but I implore you be patient with me and don't get too upset that I keep making the reader a girl.

It also seems like the feedback is starting to wane a little. If there is anything I can change, let me know. I'm always looking for ways to improve my writing!

Until next time!

~Starlight