Chapter 2: In which they talk
A/N: Chapter 2—and it is a doozy! Most of my chapters are ~1500 words, and this is almost 3 times the length. I would really appreciate reviews of this chapter. If you review, you will receive a preview of the next chapter!
Thank you so much for reading! It is exciting to know that so many people like my little story.
As always, Arrow does not belong to me. I'm just playing around with some ideas.
O ~ F ~ O ~ F
"Ok. That was a lot of fun."
"Should we talk now?" Oliver isn't sure why he is suddenly so eager to talk about the status of their relationship. Laurel could easily testify to the fact that he isn't good about talking about his feelings, he is much more likely to bottle things up, and even drink himself into oblivion to avoid dealing with his issues. But things with Felicity are different. It is Saturday right now. They have to go to work on Monday. Felicity is his EA, he needs her there, not to even begin to think about all their nightly responsibilities.
"You're volunteering to talk? Aren't you more into sulking silently?"
"I don't sulk. I'm…serious, contemplative even."
"Seriously sulky. Why don't you just admit to a character flaw?" Felicity reaches up with her hand and rubs Oliver's jaw as she speaks. Felicity, still deliciously naked, is leaning on her side, her head propped on her palm. Oliver has never seen her like this before. Incredibly relaxed, tousled, slightly smudged make-up. While Felicity's work clothes are sometimes less than professional (those short skirts that have tortured him for years) she always looks put together. Even when she was kidnapped by the Count, she had make-up on and her hair up. Oliver likes how Felicity looks now, like he knows her in ways that no one else does. He gets her at work, at the Foundry, and now in bed.
"I have many flaws. I just don't think that the fact that I think before I speak is one of them." Oliver stops. Suddenly, he can't help but think about his many character flaws. He remembers when he went over to Laurel's apartment after he got back. He called himself damaged, then. Oliver wonders if he's better now, good enough to be with Felicity. Laurel, Helena, and Sara were all damaged. Laurel was traumatized by Sara's apparent death and how her family fell apart. Helena lost her fiancé because of her father. Sara went through hell, just like he did. He's been with other girls since then, but it has never gotten serious, where he has had to display all the broken parts. Felicity already knows him so well, in some ways she knows him better than anyone else, and that will obviously accelerate their relationship. He can't lie to her the way he can lie to so many other people in his life. Since the beginning, his attempts at lying have just seemed preposterous to her.
Oliver considers all of his flaws. Most obviously, he is a murderer. He has tried to be better, to honor Tommy's memory, but there is still blood on his hands. He regrets so many of the things that he has done, and also the things that he didn't do. He should have been able to protect his mother. He should have protected both Shado and Sara — he could have saved them all so much pain. He should have given Slade the Mirakuru cure instead of letting rage overtake him and attempting murder. Obviously, he is impetuous. He can't always control his temper, he is secretive, he is obsessive, he is single-minded to the point of ignoring the people that need him.
The more Oliver thinks about himself, the more he wonders about what Felicity sees in him. She doesn't know everything, but she knows enough to understand the kind of person he is. She is such a good person. The entire reason she originally joined their crusade was to help Walter, simply her boss who asked her to look into some things. Oliver realizes that
"Are you making a comment about my issues with word vomit? I thought you found it charming and adorable? Not that you said that I am charming and adorable, I just assume. Because you know, if you don't find that particular habit to be charming and adorable, then I don't know how we can be friends, let alone anything more."
"I find it charming and adorable. I find everything about you to be charming and adorable." Charming and adorable — that is the perfect way to describe Felicity. She isn't hot, not like Laurel or Sarah. She isn't even beautiful, not like a model or something. Rather, she is cute. Amazing in bed to be sure, but cute. It is evident here in her brightly painted apartment, and her enormous collection of nail polish. He's never seen her do it, but almost every day she has different colored nails. She must spend hours color coordinating and painting them. She's completely adorable.
Oliver leans over Felicity, smoothing her hair away from her face. "You are completely adorable."
"Ok. Well not that this hasn't been fun, and very sexually satisfying, but I was promised a conversation." Felicity sits up in bed, keeping the sheet up to her arm-pits. She is smiling, and she looks happy. Felicity grabs an elastic from the bed-stand and uses it to quickly tie her hair up in a pony tail. While she does, the sheet slips down a bit, and Oliver grins. He has never been shy about his body, but he assumed that Felicity would be.
"Yes. I promised, and now we'll talk."
"So, I've thought about this a bit. And I have a list of things that we need to figure out."
"You have a list?" Oliver laughs a bit at this.
Felicity leans over to the night-stand again and grabs a notepad and a pen.
"You have a prink sparkly pen with feathers?" Oliver snags it from her hands, and tickles her face with the feathery end. "Everything about this pen suits your personality. It is the way I see you—bright and shiny and adorable, but also incredibly practical, capable of so much. You are so brilliant Felicity, you deserve every happiness."
"Stop it, you sweet talker. Here is my list: We have to talk about what this relationship is going to be; whether we're going to be public about this relationship, and who is going to know; work, and the role I am going to continue to play as your EA; how this could potentially impact Team Arrow, and what we're going to tell the guys; and finally, a contingency plan for what is going to happen if this doesn't work out." Felicity reads all these items off her list, tapping the notepad with her pen. She draws in checkboxes next to each item, so she can keep track of their conversation.
"That is a very comprehensive list. You know that I'm someone much more interested in the here and now, and not long term planning, right?"
"Yeah, I've noticed. But we can't make this work, this can't be anything if we don't have a plan, so you have to be serious. We both have to be serious about this."
"Ok. Let's not have this serious conversation in bed. I'm too easily distracted. Plus, I'm starved." Oliver climbs out of bed, totally naked as he searches around the floor for his boxers. He finally finds them, underneath Felicity's underwear and pulls them on. He pulls on jeans, and decides to keep his shirt off. "I'll wait for you in the kitchen, ok?"
"Yeah, thanks." Felicity gets out of bed as Oliver heads out. She considers putting on his shirt, like girls always do in the movies, but she figures that she might as well wear a shirt that fits—she does have her entire closet. She grabs a tank top and a pair of sweatpants out of her closet and pulls them on. She reties her ponytail and heads into her living room. Oliver is incongruous with the rest of her apartment—he is too much. He's standing at the counter in the kitchen, making a couple of sandwiches. She associates him more with wielding a bow and arrow than a butter knife. Nevertheless, he looks cute and at home in her small apartment.
"I raided your fridge and I found what I needed to make turkey sandwiches. I found brown mustard, which is one of my favorite things to put on a sandwich, and I figure you would not have it in there if you didn't like it. So I took the risk and put it on both our sandwiches."
"Everything looks great. Thanks for doing this. I never really associated you as having lots of skills in the culinary arts."
"Not many. But I know how to fend for myself. You should see some of the things I ate on the Island. My first meal was a pheasant I killed myself. I snapped its neck, and it was disgusting."
Felicity walks over Oliver, and puts her hand on his muscular forearm. She doesn't say anything, she just wants to bring him comfort, and remind him that he can always talk to her, about anything. Oliver once told Felicity that she could tell him about her day, and in the past few years they have gotten close enough where they talk to each other, always. She doesn't have to say anything specifically, it is enough for him to know she is there for him. "Its alright. In the past few years, I have learned that while I can't forget, I can move on. Having you, having all the people in my life, that's what makes it all better."
"Ok. Let's eat. I'm excited to taste your sandwich making skills." Oliver places both sandwiches on plates and carries them over to the living room. Felicity sits down on one end of her teal couch, and motions for Oliver to join her. They sit facing each other, Felicity with her legs crossed and Oliver has his legs out, propped against her coffee table.
"I like your apartment. It suits your personality."
"Thank you. I'm hardly ever here to enjoy it, but it is a nice place to hang out when I get the chance. No more distractions, mister. Let's start with the easiest. What are we, and what we both want from this relationship."
"I'm not the guy I used to be. I want to be in a relationship with you, Felicity—with you."
"Well, ok then. I'm thinking that means an actual relationship. Not just sex, or friends that have sex sometimes. I think that means dates and cuddling, and being my boyfriend. Booty calls are great, but it can't just be that you show up at 1 AM, looking to sneak into bed."
"Felicity, stop. I know what being in a relationship means. I've actually been in quite a few." Oliver chuckles at the end of the sentence, somewhat nervously. He does not want this conversation to turn into a discussion about his sexual history—he is not going to come out looking good at the end of that.
"Yeah. That's the other thing, cheating isn't cute. I'm not Laurel, I'm not someone who can forgive that. If we're going to be in a relationship, then it is only with each other."
"I'm on board Felicity. And you should know, I can take you on some pretty great dates."
"Yeah, when you show up on time." Felicity says this under her breath and takes a big bite out of her sandwich. Oliver grimaces, he does have a tendency for lateness, or departing suddenly. Fortunately, Felicity knows why he is always running off places, and she even runs off with him. "Great, we'll call the first item on my list finished. On to the second, whether we want to be public about our relationship."
"I don't exactly know what you mean by 'public'. Much as you may think that people care that much about me, I'm not sufficiently exciting for the paparazzi to continue following me around."
"Public as in all the people we know. Our families, friends, Queen Consolidated, random people that might see us out, there are a lot of people we have to think about, Oliver."
"I don't want to keep us a secret, Felicity. I'm not ashamed of being in a relationship with you, and I want to give Thea a chance to know you." Oliver reaches over to Felicity, and puts his hand on her knee. He doesn't have words to explain what he wants, that he wants Thea to have more family, and he feels like Felicity can be part of that. He hopes that Felicity can understand how important she is to him, how much he wants this to work. Oliver has never been one for thinking about the future, but he can see a long future with Felicity. Christmases and Hannukahs, Thanksgivings, all the trappings of family.
"I know, and I agree. It isn't every day that a girl gets to tell her friends that she's dating a billionaire CEO who looks like a brooding Greek God. So we tell our friends and our families, and I already said that I want to go on dates. So that leaves the issue of Queen Consolidated."
"Which leads right to our next point, doesn't it. Can I check off point 2 from the list?" Without waiting, Oliver snags the pen and notepad from Felicity, and crosses off the second item with a flourish. He dreaded this conversation, because he has so much trouble verbalizing his feelings, and he was afraid to mess it up. But this is going well—they haven't really disagreed about anything, because at the end of the day, they really want to be together.
"I can't be the girl dating the boss." The words fall out of Felicity's mouth, slightly garbled. She meant to say it a bit more delicately, but what she means is that they have to be careful about what they do. "I don't know if this is going to be news to you, but sexism in alive and well in the work place. If people at work find out, I'll get labeled a slut, or that I'm just sleeping my way to the top, and nothing will stick to you. I worked too hard and for too long to do that to myself and my career."
"I agree. I would never—never—want to diminish everything that you have worked so hard to achieve. I am in awe of you Felicity Smoak, and I would never do anything to diminish your accomplishments."
"Other than make me your secretary? Do you get that I went to MIT?"
"Really, we're going to have this fight, again? I told you before, Felicity. If I need to talk to you about our nightly activities, I can't spend my day traveling 18 floors constantly."
Felicity stands up. They've had this argument before, and she understands why she needs to be Oliver's EA, to be easily accessible to him at all times, but she hates this aspect of her life. She hates that when she goes to her next college reunion, people will ask her what she's doing with her life, and she will feel ashamed about admitting the non-secret part of her job.
Felicity storms around the couch—she is so angry, she needs some space from Oliver. "Yes, we are going to have this argument again. Because while your cover story gets to be that you are a CEO of a fortune 500 company, I'm an EA. I went to MIT! I was Phi Beta Kappa. I graduated summa cum laude! Do you realize how hard I worked, while you partied your way through half the Ivy League. It isn't fair, and I hate it!"
Oliver know she hates being an EA. He knows that feels frustrated and belittled, and like she isn't working up to her full potential. The truth is, he knows that they need to find a workable solution that isn't going to make her quite as miserable. Oliver stands up slowly. "Felicity. I know you hate your job title. I know that you are frustrated that people just think that you are an EA, when you are so much more than that. The truth is, you do about half my job, and I couldn't be the Arrow without you. You have sacrificed so much for me, to make this city better, and I am so sorry. I want to make this better, figure out a better cover."
Felicity deflates a little bit. "I'm mad and spoiling for a fight, and then you act all sweet and understanding, and then you ruin it."
"I care about you Felicity, so much. I want to make you happy, professionally, personally. Whatever I can do to make that possible, I will."
"Still, we have to talk about it, we need to figure it out. I guess for now, while we don't have any better options, I will remain your EA. But I am tired of this, and I need you to understand that I am not going to stay an executive assistant forever. But at work, no hanky panky. We are professionals, and I want to keep the changing nature of our relationship private, at least for now."
Oliver laughs, "Hanky panky? That's an interesting turn of phrase." It occurs to Oliver that he never laughed quite as much, at least after the island, as when Felicity came into his life. She is so sweet and sincere, and her rants are so adorable, she easily brings joy into Oliver's life. It isn't anything specific, but it is the understanding that Felicity really cares about him, and feels safe enough to be honest.
"Yes, hanky panky. None of that. We'll consider this discussion suspended until further notice." Felicity moves back to the couch, and takes some time to finish her sandwich. Oliver heads into the kitchen, and raids Felicity's freezer, hoping for some ice-cream. Hitting the jack-pot, Oliver finds several pints of ice-cream. He grabs the cookie dough, his own personal favorite, and the mint chip. Felicity ate a pint after he told her about his nighttime activities, so he figures it might be her favorite. Oliver grabs a couple of spoons, but he decides to pass on bowls—it would just be more cleanup later.
Oliver walks back into the living room. "I brought sustenance for the rest of our conversation. What's next?"
"The consequences for Team Arrow. I have some thoughts on this." Oliver smiles at her. Somehow, he doesn't think that this will affect Team Arrow too much. Diggle has known that Oliver has had feelings for Felicity for years, for longer than Oliver knew. Roy probably won't be bothered, although he might resent Oliver for having his relationship stay part of Team Arrow, and that Oliver and Felicity don't have to keep secrets from each other. Things might get complicated with Sara, because of their earlier relationship, but she is already in and out of town. Sara once told Oliver that she wanted him to have someone who brings out the light in him, and Felicity definitely does that.
"Felicity, please proceed."
"Really, this is about the contingency. I have feelings for you Oliver, serious romantic feelings that really make me want to be with you. Not to mention the sexual feelings, because lord knows you are sexy, and we are great together. Great, I mean sexually speaking. We haven't really started a relationship yet, so it is hard to tell if we're going to be good in a relationship. You don't exactly have a clean track record with this. Ok, I am going to stop that train of thought and refocus in three, two, one. Even if our relationship can't work, and we can't be together, I can't lose helping our team make this city better."
"I can't lose you Felicity. Professionally, I mean. We would not have done half of what we have done, saved hundreds of lives, without you. I would never push you out, even if we break up and it hurts to be around you. And personally, I don't want to lose you either. If we do break up, I'm not sure if I could stand to be friends with you anymore, not as close as we have been, but I really want that. You're one of the most important people in my life, Felicity, and I will do everything I can to keep us together."
"Ok. But if we break up, I can't be your Executive Assistant anymore. There is a limit to what I'm willing to do, and what I'm willing to tolerate. One of the actual things that I do as your EA and arrange your social schedule—which I don't need my fancy college degree for, by the by—and I will not arrange dates with other girls."
"Ok. That seems like a good solution. Although, I don't want you to have to stay my EA forever, either way. We'll come up with something else. Felicity, I want you to know that I really care about you, and I am going to do everything that I can to make it work."
"So you've said, handsome. I think you deserve a reward, after having such a long conversation." Felicity moves off the couch, puts their plates in the sink and puts the remains of their ice cream pints back into the freezer.
"What kind of reward?" Oliver's eyes follow Felicity intensely.
"How about you follow me into the bedroom, and find out."
O ~ F ~ O ~ F
"I'm a very lucky man, Felicity Smoak."
"You just like me for my technological skills, don't you." Oliver starts, shocked that she could think that. But he looks at her, and she is smiling impishly, and he realizes that she is just joking.
"I like everything about you." Oliver means it, she's wonderful. Felicity pounces on Oliver, she is all smiles and giggles. She tickles him, and Oliver gives in to the urge and laughs. He has never felt so light-hearted, as he feels with Felicity. For them, there is no baggage, there is no dark and twisty history, where he did some terrible things and broke her heart. Things with Sara and Laurel were too complicated—he was the idiot that slept with and fell in loved with both sisters. This relationship, between him and Felicity, he thinks that it can work out. Oliver isn't really someone for thinking long term, but somehow, it has to be that way with Felicity. He definitely cannot imagine his life without her.
O ~ F ~ O ~ F
A/N: Please review! As a thank-you for reviewing, you will receive a short preview of next chapter!