Thanks to the 200 people who have favored this story. I'm still powering through, but between The Royal Reunion and the fact I still haven't figured out where I'm going with the Elsa suitor thing, or when to end this, it's why updates have been coming slower.

If Anna, Kristoff, Joan, Christian or Olaf were at dinner, there was no chance it would be quiet for more than 10 minutes. Their all-time record had been almost four-and-a-half minutes about two-and-a-half years ago.

But they weren't at dinner with Elsa and Caspar. As her committee, they did insist they had to see how they got along at dinner – at least Anna and Joan did. Then again, Elsa pointed out that they'd probably be too bored, and that they had other more entertaining distractions anyway.

It wasn't like Elsa and Caspar didn't talk or have passion. They spent the whole afternoon in a heated debate over what books would make it into their hypothetical study. By the time they finished going over the work of Lars Christopher Anders, they were almost too worn out to make it to dinner.

Since they didn't debate and square off over 'fun' topics and activities, according to half of the committee, it was easier to convince them they'd be bored watching them at dinner. Now that they'd gone nine minutes without a word, the committee would probably say it was right. Then they'd have a lot more things to say.

As much as Elsa loved the things they said, sometimes it was nice to take a break from hearing them. It wasn't a lingering side effect of 13 years of solitude, either. But between the chaos of family and the madness of being Queen, quiet moments and companionable silence was a rare, valuable commodity for Elsa. Especially with another person.

Kristoff and Christian were the closest who came to giving her that. Yet much of Kristoff's time was with Anna and the kids, plus they'd worn his love of silence down over the years anyway. By necessity, Elsa and Joan had helped do the same with Christian as well.

However, Caspar had proven to be someone she could get loud and excitable with – if only about 'nerdy' stuff, by Anna's standards. Then they could rest their voices, set things aside, and sit together in peace and quiet. To fulfill Elsa's lingering love of peace, quiet and solitude, while still giving her the companionship she was now used to.

To Anna and Joan, that wasn't the kind of sweeping, epic love they thought Elsa was entitled to. It wasn't even the kind of slow burning love Anna had with Kristoff. They did recommend Caspar to stick around because Elsa liked him, but they still insisted Elsa needed grander love. Otherwise it would be like she was settling and marrying for convenience after all.

If Elsa wasn't holding out for spectacular, conscious altering love, then what had been the point of waiting all this time?

To be honest, there were times Elsa asked herself that as well. However, this should not be one of those times.

But it was the last quiet time she was going to get, as it turned out.

"Aunt Elsa, Aunt Elsa!" Joan's voice rang, seconds before her and the rest of the family barged in. They were supposed to be with the rest of Caspar's family, though – at least two of them.

"We tried, Aunt Elsa, we really did! We're sorry!" Christian pleaded, right as Elsa noticed the chicken feathers on his coat. And the food on Joan's face. And the little bump on Anna's forehead. And the traumatized look on Kristoff's face.

"Oh, it was that bad?" Caspar asked knowingly.

"That's the word you want to go with? Really?" Anna asked disbelievingly.

"What….what words would you come up with?" Elsa asked, at a loss herself.

"Liar! That's one!" Kristoff directed at someone – technically forgetting his place below the Queen and someone who was born a prince. "You said it'd be fun to watch over your niece and nephew! What does fun mean where you come from? Can you look that up in one of your books?"

"Did they misbehave that much?" was all Caspar could ask. "Even with my sister there?"

"It's not that! They were just too, too…too much!" Joan called out. "We couldn't keep up! Look at us, does it look like we did?"

"Elsa….is that how bad I was? When I pestered you during work and…..in those years?" Anna questioned. "I have never been sorrier than I am now."

"They were too much for you?" Elsa finally let it sink in.

"Their mom has them now, but we don't got much time," Christian warned. "Please let us hide here before they seek us."

"Why did you even bring them anyway?" Anna turned to Caspar. "We're a love expert committee! If we were babysitters, we would have put it on our charter! But it was the next to last thing we cut out!"

"It wasn't my idea, okay? My mother made them come!" Caspar cracked.

"Your mother the queen?" Elsa clarified.

"She figured if your family bonded with my niece and nephew, and they liked my sister, you'd have a special reason to like me," Caspar confessed. "It sounded smart the way she said it. Since you love your niece, nephew and sister so much. I love them too and they are lovable! The kids are just….rambunctious sometimes."

"Whatever that word is, double it and it's still not enough!" Kristoff exclaimed. "How are they your niece and nephew?"

"To be fair, you'd have to ask how I'm Elsa's sister too," Anna pointed out. "But still! They're too much for even me! You should have warned us!"

"No one's ever supposed to be too much for the Arendelle princesses. That's what all the research said. Mother even double checked it," Caspar defended.

"You can't do everything with research! And sometimes parents don't always know best! Believe me!" Anna insisted. "You know, if they're too much, you're too little! There's no balance in your family!"

"Anna!" Elsa objected. "He obviously had nothing to do with what they did. He's done nothing but be courteous to me all day. In spite of some misguided opinions," she accidentally brought up.

Getting back on course, she finished, "Do not take out your frustrations on other people's….energy on an innocent person. Especially a guest! Are we clear? That goes for everybody!"

This seemed to snap the family out of their little spiral. Joan was the first one to say, "Sorry, Aunt Elsa. Sorry, Prince Caspar."

Her mother followed suit – about a second later than Elsa would have liked – by saying, "I'm sorry. I was out of line."

"I guess I didn't have to cross a few myself," Kristoff followed suit.

"Sorry," Christian said, although he had the least to apologize for.

"It's all right," Caspar let them off the hook. "Should I….go talk to them?"

"No no, I wouldn't wish them on….." Anna started. "Right, probably too far, got it. We'll just….let you go back to your dinner. You make it as quiet as you want, and be thankful you have that chance."

The family/committee took their leave, hoping they'd live to see Elsa again. Once she and Caspar were alone, the silence returned as well – but Elsa wasn't as comfortable with it this time.

"Did you really want them to come here?" Elsa had to ask. "Or were you forced into it?"

"I, well…." Caspar tried to buy time by pausing and eating some more, but it didn't work for long. "My mother may have done more to convince me than I did."

"What did you really want?" Elsa went on.

"I….may have wanted to have more alone time with you first. Before I brought them," Caspar admitted. "I mean, you would have met them eventually, if everything went well! I wanted you to like me more first, before we got that far."

"But your mother made you think that wouldn't be enough," Elsa concluded. "So you tried to use my love of family to impress me. I don't love seeing my family suffer through that much, though. No matter how judgmental they can be." Frowning, she asked, "Was it possible that you could have said no?"

"My sister's better at that than I am. Mother says that's why the kids are so wild," Caspar revealed.

So it seemed Caspar was a Mother/Parents Know Best kind of person. Someone who lived by someone else's flawed example and not his own. Someone like the old Elsa, if she had no powers and a different gender.

When Elsa knew he was like her in being quiet, restrained and intellectual, she was comforted. But seeing he could also be submissive and unable to stand up for himself, like old Elsa, was….less comforting.

15 years ago, Elsa might have settled for someone like that. But after everything Elsa had become, all the growth she went through and all the bravery and self-worth she'd found in herself….maybe Anna was right. In context if not in tone.

Maybe Caspar was too limiting for her. Maybe there wasn't enough of a balance between them.

He was obviously a fixer upper, which Kristoff's in-laws never considered a bad thing. Obviously, Elsa felt for him and wished he could stand up for himself more, like she learned to do. If she got the chance, she would help him figure out how in an instant. She might just make that chance happen before he left Arendelle anyway.

But part of that felt more like pity and an act of friendship. Not an act of true love.

Elsa already knew she could be very good friends with this man - something she didn't instantly know about the other suitors yet. However, just because they were similar in some ways didn't make them destined for love.

And in spite of everything Elsa owed Kristoff's family – to a point, given their poor choice of words almost 30 years ago – fixer-upping didn't really feel like the kind of love she was looking for, after all this time.

"I'm sorry, Caspar," Elsa shared, though she wasn't sure what the main reason for it was.

"So am I," he still said back. "Perhaps I should….at least check on my sister."

"I'll come with you," Elsa offered.

"No, you should at least finish your dinner. This is my fault, I'll try to clean some of it up," Caspar insisted.

An eagerness to accept more blame than necessary, and to spare others more hassle than they should. Elsa knew that too well. Too much to let him suffer through it with a clear conscience.

But again, it felt more like basic human decency than something that could be overwhelming love.

Darn that committee for teaching her the difference all this time. In the most bumbling, clumsy way possible at times, like tonight. But it was still an annoying valuable lesson.

Albeit one that wasn't the most ideal help right now.

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One week later

Is this how Anna and her family felt around Caspar's niece and nephew? That they were way too much for even them?

If so, Elsa almost cursed herself for thinking Caspar was too little. Because Lanford certainly was too much. At least his activities were.

He always wanted to explore the landscape. He wanted to ride something, where it was horses, reindeer or some other four legged animal that could hold his weight. He didn't want to stay in and rest. He didn't read and he didn't bow down easily.

Elsa had learned to love and appreciate those qualities, and find them in herself as well. But not to this extent.

Yet she kept doing them with him anyway. And not just because it was this week's queenly duty.

When Lanford chopped down a tree, she began to wonder if that….weird feeling in her stomach was how Anna felt when Kristoff split ice apart. When Lanford didn't hesitate to touch and hold her steady during a ride, she didn't find herself cringing at someone other than a family member touching her. When he lifted something heavy, she could have sworn her face didn't look so pale.

If only he would slow down so she could try and think these feelings through.

Elsa was the Queen, so she was within her rights to make him slow down and then some. But she could see the slight boredom and discomfort whenever they just walked around the castle, gardens and library. It was usually enough to make her suggest they go outside after all, and he lit up enough that she felt proud and excited – at first.

Now here they were, hiking across a frozen lake to get back to their sled. Lanford was carrying the body of an elk, which they found already near death during their ride. He mercy killed it and was going to take it back to the castle, for his men to….feast on.

Despite Elsa's love of elk and how many of them were part of her family….the way he carried it on his back, and still marched without delay to the sled was….a noteworthy sight.

Enough that she didn't notice much else. Such as the cracks on the part of the frozen lake she was on. If she had, her powers might have helped her freeze them over. But she was too distracted in more ways than one.

When the ice broke and she fell through it, she didn't feel cold, of course. In a flash, she feared she'd be scared enough to freeze herself over under the water. In the next flash, she saw something else crash through the ice from a distance.

In the next flash, she felt someone taking her arm and lifting her out of the water. It could only be one person.

With some effort, but not a huge amount, Lanford lifted her out and got her into his arms this time. They had been free because he threw the elk down – and through the ice – to come get her.

"You're okay," Lanford breathed his relief. "You're not even shivering."

"You thought I would be?" Elsa questioned, if only to do something other than relax in his arms, bridal style.

"Right, Snow Queen, got it. Wish I'd have remembered that before I threw away dinner," Lanford sighed.

That was what he was focused on too? That still mattered to him? She wasn't shivering or cold, but she still could have been in real danger, on his watch. First he distracted her with his….talents, and then he winds up more concerned about a lost dinner than her?

Then again, he did save her in the first place. He had no problem lifting her and springing to action in the first place.

Then again again, he was sure keeping her in a…..compromising position of action now. One unbecoming of a Queen.

Then again times infinity, being becoming of a Queen got her nothing but 36 years of….pent up need.

Yet Queenly manners dictated that she should thank him, on behalf of Arendelle.

But it wasn't Arendelle that leaned in for its Queen's first real, deep kiss.

And it wasn't Arendelle that kissed her back. Or kept holding her in his arms afterwards as he walked over to his sled. Or kissed her again once they sat down in it.

Yet Arendelle perhaps wouldn't have touched the right strap on Elsa's dress, and started to move it back. But Lanford was.

"What…." Elsa began to snap out of it. "Wait, stop! What are you doing?"

"The cold doesn't bother you, right? So being less….covered up in it isn't a problem for you, right?" Lanford figured. For a split second, Elsa considered figuring that too. A brief, imaginative second.

At least until reality and sanity stepped back in, once the strap was lowered.

"It is a problem! Stop it now!" Elsa commanded. "I am still the Queen, and you are still a prospective suitor! This is unbecoming of both of us!"

"Are you…." Lanford started. However, the chill from Elsa's eyes – laced with slight guilt and shame that Lanford couldn't make out – made him think clearer. So did the noisier wind around them.

"My apologies. That was out of line," Lanford got himself to admit. "You inspired me to lose control and let it go. Maybe I did take it too far, but…."

"There's letting it go and then there's….that," Elsa noted, telling him and herself there was a difference they both should have known.

"Right, of course," Lanford admitted. "So….once we get back and go inside….would there still be a difference then? Just so I know and don't get things mixed up again?"

Part of Elsa really wanted to say no. It wanted to throw aside those other doubts about him and just….throw other things aside. After all this time, she was entitled to it.

"Come on, I saved your life! Whether you could handle the cold or not!" Lanford pointed out. "I should have a….edge over those other guys by now. I've earned it."

Maybe he had, in a way. But that's not what Elsa wanted this to be about it. That's not what she had waited 36 years, and 15 years of freedom, for.

The part of her that actually felt lust after all thought it was. But Elsa's committee wasn't made up of lust experts. She didn't let herself go through with this whole process for lust. She wanted to feel an emotion for someone other than her family, and it wasn't lust.

If she felt a part of that….other emotion that started with l, she could justify it. But with a clearer head….she just couldn't.

"You've earned the eternal gratitude of this kingdom. You will be rewarded….just not in that way," Elsa got a clear enough head to say. "If that doesn't suit you, I could tell the….unabridged version of the aftermath of your heroism. The more hands on version. Regardless of who started it."

Although Lanford might not have been much of a thinker, he did seem to ponder that one. Fortunately for him. "Saving your life is its own reward," he at least said with some sincerity. "Perhaps that's enough heroism for one day."

Now he wanted to take things slow. At the least, the irony didn't make Elsa snap, or feel any other strong emotion, during the sled ride home.

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That was it. Elsa now had two full looks at each of her prospective suitors. And she was no closer to finding a frontrunner. Or closer to feeling less depressed at referring to….the rest of her love life like that.

Individually, all of them had traits she really liked. Maybe close to loved. But each of them had traits that were the exact opposite.

Taking the good with the bad was crucial in love, as far as she knew. Yet for each of them to have parts that were too good, or too bad, or mixed too much in between, was too confusing.

Love shouldn't be confusing in that way. It was supposed to be clearer. It was supposed to be just right.

The fact none of them were out and out villains, or way too good to be true, or way too bad to possibly be good later, was promising. She could learn to like and deeply bond with them all, if she hadn't already. But it wasn't love. Not yet.

Elsa, of all people, should have known that love takes a lot of time. But she'd been waiting and patient enough. And her people and council had waited long enough for her to pick someone too. But if she didn't learn to love at least one of them soon, it would just be picking someone out of convenience – the one thing she didn't want to settle for anymore.

But if she had to learn to love someone, it wasn't love. Or was it the closest thing to love with a man that she could get? If she could really love one of them, wouldn't she know by now? If she didn't, what could she really do now?

These confusing, terrible questions made her resort to an old habit as she wandered around in the garden. To help herself deal with overwhelming, frustrating emotions all alone – an ironically tragic choice of words - she resorted to hugging herself for comfort and control over herself again.

"Aunt Elsa?"

Luckily Elsa didn't lose control in other ways before she heard Joan. Or saw her and Christian coming over.

But their obvious concern nearly made her give that control right back. Especially when they saw her hugging herself. They knew what it meant when she was that distressed.

Elsa kneeled down to get on an even level with them, then managed to let go of herself. This left it wide open for Joan and Christian to go over and hug her themselves, without a word.

She didn't ask to be hugged, but they knew she needed it. It was a sudden touch, but she trusted them to do it right. They were so impulsive, unlike her, but she loved them so much for it without condition.

They just sensed she needed something, even before she could acknowledge it, and gave it to her without knowing why she needed it. Right?

"Did Lanford tell you what happened?" Elsa asked, figuring he'd already bragged about saving her life, if not the hands on part.

"No, what?" Joan asked curiously. Christian didn't look like he knew, either. Perhaps Lanford wasn't taking chances and was leaving every scandalous part out, if he was talking.

Which meant they weren't hugging Elsa because of an adventure gone wrong. They hugged her just because she was their aunt Elsa and she needed them.

That was the kind of love Elsa wished she'd felt from anyone else these last several months. It was the only kind that saved her life over these last 15 years, far more than Lanford ever had. It was the kind of love Elsa did hope she'd find by now with one of these men.

That just right kind of love.

There was still too much time left, and too much at stake – and too much potential collateral damage – to give up now. Yet Elsa still had no idea if it would pay off, even after all this time already.

If it came so close to paying off with Caspar and Lanford and didn't work, what else would it take?

But as Joan and Christian's grips tightened, Elsa figured there'd be plenty of time to ponder those sad questions later.

That only made her treasure her time, and hugs, with those whose level of love she would never doubt all the more.