You know. I wasn't going to post this. Here I am, all excited that I updated, and I get one review. And I told myself if I get one review, then I will go two days in a row. My Microsoft Word isn't even working for goodness sakes and I'm still finding a way. This means I don't have my LIST. The LIST of all the WHAT IFS. I am WINGING (read: doing a recent one I was going to do next anyways) it here.

So this chapter is all for Kiki, who ACTUALLY reviewed.

It will also be dedicated to anyone who reviews the last chapter. Cookie for you. XD

Oh yes. This has Twilight ripping. XD Oh, I don't own the books mentioned in here. And I couldn't get the What If centered without Word, but I don't feel like you mind, hehee.

Ahem.

What If...

Demyx fell in love with Edward Cullen after reading Twilight?
((as suggested by the brilliant Tayberry))

All was quiet in the library. Zexion counted his blessings as he blissfully read his book (research, if you must know) quietly in his favorite chair. This was a miracle because Demyx was sitting beside him, also quietly reading a romance novel. Zexion decided to risk the silence and peek over at the Melodious Nocturne. His blonde hair gently framed his concentrated expression; he was completely immersed in his fictional world. Zexion frowned as he looked at the scandalous cover of the novel. I hate to press my luck, Zexion thought as he continued to peruse the cover, but when he is calm and focused is the best time to discuss such matters.

"Demyx?" Zexion asked quietly, still loathe to lose the companiable silence.

Demyx blinked, inwardly shaking himself back into the real world. "Yes, Zexy?"

"Why do you read those books?"

Demyx looked confused. "Because I enjoy them...? I don't see the problem--"

"That's not what I meant," Zexion corrected himself, "I mean, why do you exclusively read romance novels? You've never tried to read anything less..." For once, Zexion stumbled for an appropriate word.

"Explicit?" Demyx said, grinning. "I've never heard you complain before about what I've learned from these books, especially when--"

"What I am saying," Zexion said, blushing as he cut him off, "is that I think you should try to find something new. Expand your horizons."

Demyx stared at him for a minute. "All right," he said slowly, "only if you'll read one of my romance novels."

Zexion paused. "....Fair enough," he conceded. "You pick a book that is more worthwhile than your....novels," he said, loathe to even put them on the same level with meaningful fiction, "and I shall read one of them."

"It's a deal."

-------------((fast forward!))--------

Zexion looked down at the romance novel with disgust. The Reckless One, it was entitled. Zexion sighed as he settled down on his bed to start reading. A few hours later, he was nearly completed with the book. He was an extremely fast reader, after all.

"He'd shown her the most exquisite care, given her profound pleasure, and taught her passion. She'd taken all he had to give and offered nothing in return. Except her love, and that she gave in abundance. Now she wanted to please him, to show him her love in the most intimate way possible..."

"My goodness..." Zexion muttered as he read a rather...Ahem...scene. No wonder Demyx renders me senseless every time he--Zexion blushed at his own train of thought. Zexion put down the book, opting for a rest to discover what book Demyx had decided to read.

--------------((to Demyx's room!))--------

Zexion entered Demyx's room to discover that it was as silent as a funeral wake. He found Demyx sprawled on his stomach on the bed, his book propped on a pillow before him. Whatever he was reading, he was nearly done with it.

"Demyx...?"

"SH!!" Demyx said, cutting him off, "Go away! I'm at the climax of the book!" Demyx rolled over to his side, effectively shutting Zexion out.

Zexion sighed before returning to his room to finish his romance novel.

-------------------((in the dead of night XD))--------------------

Zexion couldn't sleep. The romance novel had filled him with...thoughts. That's it, thoughts. That he needed to discuss with Demyx. Immediately.

He has to be done with that book by now, Zexion thought as he summoned a portal to Demyx's room, I wonder what it is?

Upon arriving in Demyx's room, Zexion discovered that he was already asleep. However, Demyx, being a light sleeper, opened his eyes the moment he heard the portal close. "Zexion...?"

"I...couldn't sleep," he said, blushing slightly before crawling into bed with Demyx, who scooted to the far side of the bed, waiting for Zexion to wrap his arms around him.

"Why are you here, Zexy?" Demyx asked, not harshly, but simply confused.

Zexion's blush returned. "I, uh," for once Zexion was at a loss for words, "I finished your book."

Demyx's eyes lightened with understanding before quickly becoming devious. "Really," he said, shifting to a more predatory position, "Did you enjoy it?"

"Indeed," Zexion said, moving ever closer to Demyx. However, he was still curious about Demyx's book. "Did you finish yours?"

Demyx, already switching into romance mode, nodded distractedly.

"What was it?"

"Twilight," Demyx replied before making a trail of kisses up Zexion's neck.

Zexion tried with no avail to stay on task. "Twilight? What's Twi---" Zexion completely forgot what he was going to say as Demyx closed in for a kiss.

------------((the next day))----------

Zexion sat in the cafeteria, eating lunch and researching quietly. I liked that book more than I thought I would, he thought to himself, but I have work to do. I wonder what Demyx's book was about though...I am well versed in the classics of fiction and I don't think I have ever heard of that particular novel. Research forgotten, Zexion became lost in his musings about what Demyx's book could possibly be about.

Maybe a mystery occurs, and the heroine must solve it before twilight? Maybe Twilight refers to a military code, and it is a historical novel...However, his musings were abruptly interrupted by Demyx's entrance into the cafeteria. His cloak was open, revealing a plain black T-shirt bearing the inscription Team Edward.

Zexion was confused as Demyx sat down for lunch and relayed a greeting. "Who's Edward?" Zexion inquired.

Demyx raised an eyebrow. "He's the gorgeous marble beefcake hero from my novel of course! I've already started the second book and I hate Jacob already; I can't believe that---why do you look like that?"

Zexion was startled. "Beefcake...hero? Made of marble? What sort of novel is this?"

"You've never read it?" Demyx all but screeched, before standing abruptly. "You must!" Before Zexion could protest, Demyx had disappeared to get the book for Zexion.

----------------((some hours later))----------

Zexion closed Twilight, clearly in shock. That. Thing. Was Demyx's idea of a novel? I've never read such trash before. The plot is minimal and downplayed, and I lost count of the ridiculous plot holes. He said there was more to this? A series? I need to talk to him. Immediately Zexion summoned a portal to Demyx's room. He found said man sprawled on his bed, reading a book entitled New Moon.

"Demyx."

Demyx ignored him, engrossed in the book.

"Demyx."

Demyx turned over.

Zexion approached the bed and turned him back, ripping the book out of his hands. "This is your idea of a novel of worth?! You have got to be kidding."

Demyx was clearly insulted. "It is!"

Zexion snorted. "It is a preteen romance novel."

"It is a true love story!"

"The vampires sparkle."

"That's their revealing trait, it is essential to the series!"

Zexion just managed to refrain from rolling his eyes. "The plotholes are numerous."

"Like what?" Demyx accused.

"They travel to Arizona's airport in broad daylight?"

"It's possible!" Demyx protested.

Zexion sighed. "The dialogue was arcane!!"

"Was not! How can you say--"

"And so the lion fell in love with the lamb?"

"It is an exemplification of their love! And its improbability!"

Zexion twitched. "And your....hero? This Edward Cullen? She keeps comparing him to marble, how is that a turn on? He keeps refraining from killing her!"

Demyx stood in anger. "Don't you dare insult Edward. I love him."

Zexion threw up his hands in exasperation. "You are impossible. Go ahead. Read your terrible series. I will be in the library, reading something worthwhile."

He stormed out of the room, opting to use the door so he could slam it.

-----------------------((a week later))--------------------

Demyx refused to speak to Zexion until he apologized for his terrible slander of Twilight. This, Zexion had no intention of doing. This is ridiculous. I am not going to apologize about slandering some ridiculous fictional character---

He stopped his own train of thought, sighing slightly. I am lonely though...not that I'd tell him. Just then, a portal appeared in the library. Zexion nearly fell out of his chair when he saw it was Demyx, looking apologetic. Zexion raised an eyebrow, waiting for him to say something.

"I'm....sorry," Demyx said finally. "You were right."

Zexion could barely contain his surprise. "Really?"

"Yes. The last book in the series made me realize how right you were."

"...How?" Zexion asked, still confused.

"Well, Bella ended up having this half vampire child named Renesmee, and Jacob---"

"Never mind," Zexion said, opening his arms for Demyx to come sit on his lap, "I don't want to know."

-----------------------((End!))-------------------

BWAHAHA Twilight ripping makes me happy. And don't you dare try to tell me that they are quality novels; they are not. My ROMANCE novels are better (BTW The one in this story is one I am reading currently XD)

You. Out there. Review. Kthx. XD Let me know you still love!

Last one: The Sickness!

Easy one:

"Number IX," Zexion ground out, "I am not putting on the wingies."

~freaky-hanyou