I AM SO SORRY I know it's been 4 months and I really try not to let it go that long, but the winter was a really bad time for me in the sense that I was super busy, really really really ill, and had way too much to deal with.
If anyone's still reading this story, THANK YOU! 3 Everyone who reads My List of Firsts is important to me, and I mean that. Your comments keep me inspired and driven, and help me not to give up even after I feel like I've let you down by not replying for so long.
This chapter is the aftermath of THE SEDDIE KISS, though if you're disappointed, I promise there's even more Seddie excitement to come.
Without further ado, Chapter 24.
Chapter 24: My First Rescue Mission
I already know what my obituary will read: April 19th, Samantha Puckett was found dead in her bedroom. There is no known cause of death, though if we could read her mind, we'd know it was as a result of pure humiliation.
Except newspapers can't read my mind, so I guess that plan is a bust.
The afternoon we got back from the camping trip, I'd hoped that I would go to bed and wake up and find out so much of that – certain parts in particular – had just been a dream. Yet when I woke up this morning, nothing had changed. I was still Sam, I still had a messy head of blonde hair, my left big toe was still slightly bigger than my right one, and I still couldn't get the memory of kissing Freddie two nights before out of my head. Pathetic. That's exactly how I felt.
I had kissed him, and this time there were no… what was the word?... pretenses, that's it, or at least I think it is… Anyway, there were no pretenses I could hide behind because, unlike the first time, I had actual feelings for the nub. Feelings were inconvenient and stupid and I wanted to drown them in a vat of Jell-O so I could eat my turkey in peace. But instead I was sitting here and gnawing on a turkey leg as if my life depended on it, since I was probably going to pass out from shock and embarrassment if I didn't have a full stomach.
Don't tell me that's over-dramatic because I'm not Carly and I refuse to be dramatic about things. I'm not that girly.
Shoving my plate in the sink and the bones in the trash once I was done, I headed into the living room and turned on the TV. We had a new one, actually. Courtesy of some guy Mom had wooed several weeks back. Guess they came in handy every now and then. That was more than I could say about her most of the time.
My phone started ringing and I dug around in my pocket until I pulled it out, turning it right-side-up so I could make out the name. Frednub. Of course.
Sighing in frustration I through it at the chair next to the couch and tried to ignore the noise. I didn't want to hear from him. He probably wanted to talk or something, now that we were away from Carly. He'd likely thought about the kiss in some educated way and wanted to inform me of what psychological problem I had or let me know that he was sorry but he just didn't like me in that way. That was some great chizz, but I already knew he didn't like me. Maybe he didn't like Carly anymore, but he sure didn't like me, and I didn't need to hear him say it. And I didn't have any mental issues except for Pathetic Disorder, which hits those who fall in love with nubs. It's in the encyclopedia. Not that I've ever opened one.
Groaning, I turned up the volume and stared absently at the show playing in front of me. Even Girly Cow wasn't distracting enough to make me stop thinking about Freddie and what had happened. I never usually thought this hard. I wasn't dumb, but I wasn't an intellectual or whatever label was given to Carly.
After I'd watched the show for about five whole minutes, my phone rang again. With a sigh of frustration at the effort, I got up and went over to the chair, picking up my phone and looking at it. Freddie. Again.
I rolled my eyes and tossed it down once more. He wasn't getting any sort of confessions or admittances from me. I wasn't that weak or desperate. I was fine going my whole life and leading him to think I'd just kissed him for no reason at all. He would have to buy it because I wouldn't give him another option.
Just as I was sitting down, the house phone rang and I sprung up angrily, rather miffed at this whole scenario. My mom didn't pay for caller ID, but I could guess who was on the other side of the phone. Pressing the talk button, I lifted the phone to my ear and huffed, "what do you want, Benson? And how did you even get this number?"
"Carly's in trouble."
"What'd she do, give herself a time out for not beating her reading speed record?" I had no interest in talking to him.
"Sam, I'm serious, she's really in trouble," I could hear the panic in his voice, and I swallowed, growing worried. Carly was my best friend; I didn't want anything happening to her.
"What happened?" I tried to sound nonchalant.
"She's stuck in the elevator. Spencer came to my apartment and told me. Apparently the fire department refused to help because they've reached their yearly quota or something like that, and he's trying to figure something out, but my mom's at her book club and Lewbert hates us, and we need more help."
Before even listening to hear what else he might say, I hung up the phone and rushed out the door, not caring about anything but Carly at the moment. She'd been there for me and helped me in so many situations, and I couldn't imagine not doing the same for her when she needed it.
It hadn't taken long for me to get there, but running up stairs wasn't exactly my favorite activity. Still, I was in a rush, so I did it, bursting into the apartment without second thought. "What's going on?" I looked worriedly at Spencer, the only person I could see right now. He turned to face me from where he was crouched on his hands and knees, his face twisted in chaos and fear.
Freddie emerged from the kitchen with a spatula and handed it to Spencer, though when he looked up, I glanced away, feeling awkward, but more focused on saving Carly. "Hey Sam," he said, the worry still there.
"Freddie," was my only response as I still didn't make eye contact with him, moving over next to Spencer, instead, and dropping down to my knees. "How long has she been in there?"
"Twenty minutes."
My eyes widened and I turned to the elevator and yelled, "I'm here, Carls! It's me, Sam, I've come to help! How are you doing?" I didn't admit to being scared often since of course I rarely got scared, but at this moment, I was somewhat scared. I'd do anything for Carly, and right now I was determined to prove to myself just how true that was.
The only issue in that plan was that I had no idea what I was supposed to do in order to help.
There was a muffled shout, but I paid careful attention so I could make out her words. "Hey Sam! I, uh, I guess I've been better, but I'm still alive, so that's a plus!"
Did Carly Shay just attempt to make a joke? Wow, being in dangerous situations really did drive you to do crazy things.
"That's definitely a plus!" I called back, trying to sound as calm as possible. The school counselor had once informed my teachers that the calmer someone sounded, the calmer it would make everyone else feel. Well, that method hadn't worked when I'd gotten angry with them, because no matter how calm they were, I still wanted to have my way, but I was hoping it'd work now, because this was Carly's life we were concerned about.
"Ugggggggggggggggg," Spencer growled in frustration, standing up and shaking his hand in annoyance, the spatula in it. "This isn't working! Whoever made elevator doors too heavy to lift with spatulas has another thing coming for them." I'd never seen Spencer truly angry, and it wasn't something I wished to see again, though his protective big brother role was clear and something Carly must've been proud of him for.
I saw Freddie walk over to Spencer and take the spatula from him. "It's okay, Spencer. It's okay. We'll figure it out." I was a little jealous. Never in my life had I been big on the whole sentimental thing. I was not good at comforting or reassuring people, not good at admitting to most emotions, and not good at dealing those of others. It had just never been who I was. Sure, sometimes I comforted Carly when she was down, and there'd even been the rare times I'd cheered Freddie up a little, too. But beyond that, I was a rookie at these kinds of things. Melanie had definitely gotten those genes, and right now, because of it, I felt kind of useless. Carly was helpless in the elevator and Freddie was calming Spencer and I didn't really have a part to play in the whole thing. What kind of friend did that make me?
Not a very good one. That was what kind.
Hours had passed, and no progress had been made. Still, there was no way we were giving up. I would rip the door off of its hinges if that was what it took. The fact that it probably weighed as much as two couches was unimportant.
It was already the early evening, since it turned out I hadn't woken up until noon today. We hadn't even eaten the whole time, and for once, there was something else controlling my thoughts.
Suddenly there was the sound of metal scraping and a loud shriek from inside the elevator, and all of us jumped to full attention and watched as the elevator shifted upward. Carly calmed down a bit when she, too, realized what was going on. Our eyes focused eagerly on the elevator, though all too soon we heard the gears come to a halt. She still wasn't far enough.
"Hey look," we heard Carly's voice a bit more clearly now, but it was still muffled since she was on the other side of the elevator door. Then we saw her fingers peeking out under the crack that was between the door and the floor. "If I stand on my very tiptoes, I can touch the floor."
A smile of relief spread across my face without even realizing it, but before I could say anything of mild encouragement, Spencer started freaking out. "Carly Shay, get your fingers away from there right now! The door could drop on them and then you'd be stuck in an elevator and have broken fingers, and I can only fix so many things at once!"
Spencer was really freaking out at this point, and while all of us seemed to be in some state of distress, obviously he was handling this the worst, which was understandable, I figured, since he was responsible for her, and probably was feeling like a failure or something, which he definitely wasn't. In fact, his chaotic response only made him a better brother, I thought.
"Okay, okay," she said loudly, pulling her fingers back. "It'll be fine, Spence."
"Yeah," he said dazedly. "It'll be fine," he repeated, as if he was trying to convince himself of it.
Several more moments passed and we thought of and discussed methods of saving her, but none of them worked or were things we could logically do at the moment. I had thought getting a smashing ball and whacking out the side of the building was a pretty good idea.
"Hey," there was a voice somewhere. "Hey!" we looked up, realizing Carly was yelling to us.
"What is it, Carls?" I asked, moving closer to the elevator.
"It's iCarly night," she shouted.
"It's also save Carly from the elevator night," I yelled back. "What's your point?"
"We're disappointing a ton of people by not broadcasting tonight." Typical Carly, always wanting to please other people.
"Kid, you're stuck in an elevator. For one time in my life, I have to say I think safety is more important than fun."
Freddie and Spencer looked at me in shock, but I waved them off, not going to get sappy all of a sudden.
Carly let out a frustrated sigh and there was a noise from inside the elevator that sounded like she'd sat down or something.
"Are you hungry? I could maybe slide a piece of bread or a rib through that crack," I offered.
"I'm fine, Sam, but thank you. I'm more bored than anything."
Freddie cleared his throat and I glanced up, not going to stop avoiding his eyes yet. "We… we could do iCarly."
"I think getting Carly out of the elevator is a little more important than putting on a web show," I snapped, looking at the elevator. It was the second thing I said to him all day.
He sighed, "I know that, and I agree, but while we're trying to figure out, we might as well do iCarly, especially if it'd keep her entertained. Plus, maybe some of our viewers will have suggestions."
I rolled my eyes mockingly. It was a good idea and I hated that it was. Couldn't he have just been unhelpful for once?
"Fine, but no one will be able to see her, and it's not iSam." Crossing my arms, I looked at Spencer, not caring if Freddie knew I was purposefully not looking at him. Weirder things had happened. Like the fact that I kissed him two nights ago. But I needed to stop thinking about it. Unfortunately the world didn't seem to want to let me.
There was a pause. Finally Freddie spoke up, "I can get a modem and see if I can feed a small camera through the crack and get it to dangle down to capture her-"
"Enough of the nerd talk. Can you figure it out nor not?"
He didn't complain. Desperate times called for desperate measures. "I can do it."
"Then go, boy, go! We don't have all day, the girl needs to get out!" I was even less patient right now, if that was possible.
"I'm going, I'm going," I saw him throw up his hands out of the corner of my eye. "Shoot," he muttered as he pulled open the door. Spencer and I turned to him in confusion. "My mom has the car."
"I'll drive," Spencer shouted in his panicky voice. Soon the two were gone, the door slammed (luckily with Mrs. Benson out, there was no one yelling at us for that), and Carly and I were alone.
"Well that was sudden," she said. I couldn't quite make out how she felt about it, but I supposed she was just as fine as she was going to be, considering she was stuck in an elevator.
"Yeah. So, um, Carls… how's it going in there?"
She chuckled softly. "Just peachy, thanks. This is how I wanted to spend my night, really."
"Seems like a blast," I remarked sarcastically.
"I know you're jealous."
"I'd say yes, but you have no meat in there."
"True." There was another pause. The minutes ticked by and we sat in silence. There wasn't really much to say at this point. All of us were worried and Carly had told me time and time again that after the initial fear, pointing out that you weren't sure how to handle a situation didn't make it any easier. Plus, Sam Puckett didn't admit to weakness, mostly because she never felt any, of course.
I wasn't sure if seconds, minutes, or hours were passing at this rate. How far did Spencer and Freddie have to go?
Just as my mind was starting to wander into annoyance, I heard a small voice. "Sam?"
I sat up again and kneeled next to the elevator, "yeah, Carls?"
"I- I know I'm hoping for the best, and I hope you are, too, but just in case-"
"Don't talk that way, kid. You're going to make it out of there, I promise. I'll set fire to the entire building if that'll get a fireman to come save you."
She laughed again and I realized that was part of why I was saying what I was. I really meant what I was saying, and she knew that was something I'd do, but I also just wanted to cheer her up, and somehow I managed to do that.
"Please don't set the apartment on fire. But thank you. I just- And don't cut me off this time. I just want you to know that if anything happens, and I don't make it out of here, I love you. You're my very best friend in the whole world and I don't know what I'd do without you. If I make it out of here, I promise to bail you out of juvy every time, even if I am trying to run a household with my husband and our three children."
"Three?"
"Yes, I'm going to have a boy and then two girls."
"I don't think you can plan those things."
"Maybe not but I did do excellently in biology."
"Fair point."
"Anyway, as I was saying, in the event I don't make it out, thank you for everything, Sam. You've always been my best friend, and your craziness has saved me from being an entirely boring person, and I just want to make sure you try hard in life and try to make something good of yourself because I know you can and I know you deserve that and I wish you would see that."
I bit my lip. I didn't do sad emotional moments, and yet, as much as I would never admit it, what she was saying was somewhat… touching.
"Carly, you're going to make it out of there."
"I hope so, but I just feel like you need to hear this."
"I heard it and it was depressing and reminded me of why I need you so much," I groaned.
"But you've come so far, I've only guided you along the way, and I just don't want you to give up. Try to make sure you don't steal all of Spencer's food and try not to kill Freddie."
She had no idea. The nub still irked me all of the time, but I definitely wasn't going to kill him, and not only because it was my best friend's dying wish.
"I promise I won't eat all of Spencer's food, and I also promise not to kill Frednub. At least not on purpose."
"Sam," she said, her tone threatening even on her fifth hour of being stuck in there.
"Fine, I won't kill him," I smiled to myself. I just won't ever look at him again so I don't need to face my mistake. Should be nice and simple.
"Thank you," she said. Then, as if we hadn't had enough of them already tonight, there was another pause. "Sam, what if I actually don't make it out of here?"
"That's nonsense, I know you will, you have to. I'll make sure of it."
"I don't know what I'd do without you."
"The feeling's mutual," I muttered, slumping down again.
For a second, I could swear I heard her chuckling. I don't know what she found funny about her impending death. "Are you laughing?"
"Kind of. I mean, think about it. If I'm going to die in here-"
"You're not."
"But just, hypothetically, if I was going to, this could be my last conversation, and we're not even being our lighthearted Carly and Sam selves. I know we get serious sometimes, but we might as well make the most of this."
There was the Carly I knew, finding some sort of positive in every scenario.
"So how do you suggest we change that?"
"I don't know," she sighed. "I guess, if this is it, I should probably tell you a secret I was waiting until we were old to let you know."
I raised my eyebrow, despite the fact that she couldn't see it. "Been keeping secrets, have you?"
"Doesn't everyone?" she asked, and I could tell she was trying to not feel guilty.
"Absolutely." Some of us are keeping ones we didn't wish existed.
"See? I'm not just keeping secrets from you."
"Are you going to tell me?" I was curious. What had Carly been up to that I didn't know about?
Another pause. "I once cheated on a test. It was an accident, I swear, but last year in history I saw the answer to the fourth question on the second page of Hannah's test and I knew it was the right answer but I still feel icky for seeing it and not confessing."
If this wasn't such a serious situation, I probably would've laughed. Okay, maybe I did laugh a little. "No one's going to strike you down for that, don't worry. And I promise it's not a big deal. Plus you're a smart girl and I'm sure you would've gotten it right, anyway."
"Still, I feel icky."
"Don't freak out about it. And it's not like I haven't done worse things."
"True, but I still feel icky about it. And I know about all of your bad endeavors, seeing as I'm the one who gets you out of most of them."
"Not all of them," I muttered. But apparently I wasn't quiet enough to keep her from hearing me through the elevator door. Dang crack between the door and the floor.
"What do you mean? Did you get arrested and not tell me? Sam, what did you steal?"
I groaned. For a minute I considered making something up.
"And don't you lie to me, woman, because if this elevator plummets downward, you're going to have to deal with the fact that the last thing you said to your best friend was a lie"
Why was she always so good at this guilting thing? It really wasn't fair. Then again, I was rather good at it, too. But that was beside the point.
"I didn't steal anything."
"Then what did you do? Did you vandalize something?"
How was I supposed to evade this? I couldn't lie to Carly. Not now.
"Didn't do that either." I would drag this out as long as possible. I didn't care if I was stubborn.
"Sam, will you just tell me, please? Unless you killed someone, it's not going to be that bad. You're not a bad person."
"You should've told me that two days ago."
"On your birthday? I spent your birthday with you and I thought you were having fun and not doing bad things."
"I was. But that was earlier in the day."
"What are you talking about?"
"I did a bad thing, Carls."
"Yes, I know that, but I'm asking you what bad thing you did."
"It's too horrible. It'll corrupt your innocent little ears."
"Sam Puckett, would you just tell me already?! And my ears aren't that small…"
Oh Carly, defending her ear size. "Better than looking like Dumbo."
"That's a good point." Another pause. By now I was openly welcoming them since they were delaying me from having to say anything. If only she wasn't stuck in there and I could distract her with doing something else.
"I have those once in a while."
"Sam."
"Carly."
"Tell me."
"No."
"Are you afraid I won't like you afterward or something? Because I promise I will. You're my best friend and that's not changing. Unless I-"
"The elevator's not going to plummet."
"I hope not."
"It won't."
"Just tell me."
"I'm not worried about you hating me, I'm more worried I'll have to deal with reality since I already am mad enough at myself."
"That was rather deep."
"Eh."
"Don't beat yourself up over it."
"If you knew what I did, you might rethink that statement."
"Well then tell me what you did and I can confirm what I meant."
"Nice try."
"Please?" her voice grew sad. That's what I couldn't handle. I couldn't deal with Carly being sad. It made me sad and I hated being sad.
"I kissed Freddie," I mumbled.
"What?"
Leaning my head back against the elevator door from where I sat, I screwed my eyes shut as if it'd keep out the yucky feeling and fight off the memory. My voice still wasn't very loud. "I kissed Freddie." It was more of a groan than anything.
"You, what?!" there was a string of surprised noises and some incoherent babbling.
Before I had the chance to say anything, the door swung open and I hurried to my feet, watching as Spencer and Freddie entered, talking animatedly. "We got the piece!" Spencer exclaimed, Freddie holding it up behind him.
"We are not done with this conversation!" Carly yelled from down in the elevator.
I looked at the ground anxiously, trying to cover up. "If you need to brush your hair for iCarly, I can try to slip one under for you, but quit complaining, I'm sure you're the most attractive captive ever." Then I looked at Spencer, "took you a while."
"The first store we went to was sold out," he explained as Freddie got to work setting up all sorts of techy things I didn't care to understand.
"Are you gonna get her that hairbrush?" Spencer broke me out of my thoughts.
"Oh yeah," I disappeared upstairs, though before grabbing a hairbrush I pulled at my hair and cursed at myself. I'd done all of this damage and now I was left to deal with the chizz. I didn't like dealing with things. So I was avoiding them.
iCarly ended up going pretty well, or at least as well as it could with us standing near each other but only visible one at a time. Spencer even made a guest appearance and did some magic trick that didn't make any sense. It was amusing, I had to admit. Carly also used the word 'secret' a bit too many times for my comfort, but I was still doing well with the not looking at Freddie thing.
Sam: 1 Reality: 0
As we were wrapping things up – or, more accurately, I was drinking lemonade while Freddie put away cords and all of us tried to think of how to free Carly from the elevator of doom – a message popped up on Freddie's laptop.
"Hey guys, look at this." With an aggravated sigh I stood up and walked next to Spencer.
"What, Frednub?" I asked impatiently.
"Casey from Idaho sent us a message, and said she started a petition to get the fire fighters to come free Carly."
"That's fine and dandy, young Fredward," Spencer placed a hand on the boy's shoulder. "But we've already reached our quota for the year." He glanced back at the kitchen with a knowing look.
"I know, but it's garnering so many votes that maybe it'll make a statement. This isn't just a cooking accident, this is Carly's life."
There was some brief arguing, but a knock at the door broke it up. I ran over (unusual effort, I know) and opened it. Miraculously, standing right in front of me were three fireman. "Holy crab."
"Are you Miss Puckett?"
"Why indeed I am."
"We heard about the situation with your friend. Is she still in there?" They glanced around the apartment.
"Right this way, gentlemen," Spencer said, walking over and gesturing.
"Thanks."
After about twenty minutes (it could've been three hours for all I knew) the door was lifted and Carly was hauled out with the help of the firemen and Spencer. Then there was a bunch of hugging. I hugged Carly, Spencer hugged Freddie, Freddie hugged Carly, Carly hugged Spencer, Freddie and I avoided hugging by awkwardly looking away (wouldn't be the first time), Carly hugged me again. As I said, lots of hugging.
I was so happy Carly was safe. She hadn't plummeted to her death, which was definitely a good thing. I definitely would've ended up in prison in Uruguay or something if she hadn't made it out.
Now I just had to avoid talking to her alone for… the rest of our lives.
Easy enough. Right?
The rest of the night was spent celebrating, with snacks and juices and all sorts of craziness that Carly said was probably a result of over exhaustion and all of the effort we'd used.
As we were sitting around, practically falling asleep, I saw Carly look between Freddie and me and then give me a questioning look, but I just ignored it, looking away and laying down, stretching out and trying to fall asleep. Maybe I could just sleep away my mistakes. My list could be updated tomorrow. Carly was safe and my life is going in a downward spiral because feelings are stupid.
Sam Puckett wasn't cut out to be in love. And yet, she was. Is. Whatever.
Soooo now Carly know about this kiss, too! And in other exciting news, I'm already working on Chapter 25, and I'm really hoping to get it up this week. The next one will have a lot more Sam/Freddie interaction than this one did, but I felt it was pivotal to show how awkward things were afterward, and how hard Sam is trying to ignore everything.
Also I know a lot of you support my inclusion of the Carly/Sam friendship (they are best friends), and I wanted to make sure that was in there. :)
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE tell me what you think, and again, I'm terribly sorry it's been so long, please have a bundle of hugs.
In addition: I HIT 300 REVIEWS (which just goes to show how much I love all of you) and so I'm a bit behind in replying to them, which I'm very sorry about. BUT, if you have any special requests/ideas for something special I could do in order to say thank you for all of the amazing support, then please just say so in your review. THANK YOU!