A/N: Thanks for reading! Thanks to everyone who's taken the time to review. Another day with Gale.
Hells Teeth. I wish I could believe it was a coincidence I got the communicuff back at the same time I went along with hiding Peeta's interview from Katniss.
When they said she hadn't seen it, it seemed like it would be better for her not to know. What was the point in her knowing? We couldn't do anything about it. It would just hurt her. I felt bad for hiding it from her, but couldn't she understand why we did it? That we wanted to protect her?
She deserved to be angry at me, but it was as if my apology meant nothing to her. She just threw it back in my face. Fine - if she's still angry, well I don't need to talk to her either. At least not talking to each other I won't damage things with her any further.
I can't tell them that Katniss knows about the interview, or even that we're not on speaking terms, since that would raise more questions. So of course they decide we should film in district 12 today. As if I ever wanted to face those ashes and ruins again, to see my home burned to the ground. But Plutarch shows us the map of Panem, talking about how much a difference their propos have made, about how we've taken control in districts 11 and 3.
So I do it, for the rebellion. In district 12, I let them grill me about my past life, I even relive that night of the bombing, leading the film crew beyond the meadow and away from the remains of our district. It's almost the end of august, and I'm dripping in sweat before we've even reached the woods. Our woods. Katniss trails the film crew as I lead them to the lake. In my mind the lake still belongs to her, really. I had only ever been here once before the bombing. By the time we get there I'm drained of words to explain the devastation and terror we felt. How can anyone who wasn't there truly understand what it felt like, running for our lives in the midst of falling bombs, acrid smoke, and burning bodies. They've pulled it all out of me, there's nothing left.
While Katniss wanders off around the lake, I step into the little concrete house to escape the film crew. The walls and floor are cool to the touch, a welcome break from the relentless heat. This was where she told me about the rebellion, or uprisings anyway. Where I told her I love her. I kneel down to put my head in my hands, only to find I'm still holding the bent metal poker. It's about all that was left of my house in the Seam, the place I was raised. With a deep breath, I stand and prop the poker next to the hearth of this lost little house, absently fingering the handle. What would have happened, if I'd still agreed to run away with her? If I hadn't insisted on staying to help the rebellion. What a laugh that turned out to be. And yet here we are. I hear a familiar footstep in the doorway and turn, meeting her gaze. She doesn't say anything, so neither do I.
They've brought cheese sandwiches for lunch. Katniss is on the far side of the group, near Pollux.
As we eat, she starts singing to the Mockingjays, who fall silent and listen before repeating back the notes. As soon as it starts, Castor immediately starts recording. Katniss must not realize the cameras are rolling, though. She seems to be doing it for Pollux, the avox. Eventually Katniss gets up, wandering aimlessly away from us, singing that old song - the Hanging Tree. It's about a man, waiting for his lover. In a twisted way it reminds me of us. Only that guy's dead.
Plutarch thinks the whole thing is great. I know Katniss didn't mean for it to be filmed. I'm still a little shocked she didn't flip out when she realized it was being filmed. Just kept going.
Walking back toward the district, I can't help but feel uneasy with all the unnecessary noise the film crew makes. We're certainly in no danger, but it still feels wrong. When we reach the big mossy boulder, I unconsciously glance in the direction of our rock ledge, our old meeting spot. Katniss must have looked too, because Cressida asks what's there. She insists we show it to her, of course.
The blackberry bush is full of ripe berries, since no one has been here to pick it clean. It marks the place where we needed each other. But I'm not sure Katniss needs me anymore. Surreptitiously I watch her playing with a blackberry, rolling it between her fingers.
Katniss catches me off guard when she tosses a berry into the air, quoting Effie Trinket's old line from the reapings. A peace offering. She wants us to go back to the way things were, even if we can't erase everything that's happened. The way things were, when we were hunting partners. We were everything, and at the same time, nothing, to each other. I watch her as the berry arches high into the air, feeling the pain of losing her, knowing we can't go back. But I catch the berry, in my mouth, like I always have. We can't go back, but at least she's offered a truce. Maybe she realizes how hard today has been for me. After a pause, I finish the phrase, "... be ever in your favor" in that falsetto tone that I would always use to mock the Capitol's way of speaking. But the odds aren't in our favor, are they?
Cressida directs us to the rocks for an interview together. We talk about our past, our lives together before the games. Neither of us reveals any buried emotions. We speak almost robotically about those days, how we kept our families alive on the bounty of these woods. I ache for the ease we shared then. When Cressida asks about the bombing in 8, Katniss clams up. But Katniss wasn't here when those bombs went off. After that, I'd have done anything to get a shot to fight the Capitol. Facing those bombers ... well it was about time I was able to do something after they'd torn my life apart.
It's late afternoon by the time we're back in the village. Katniss has them film her at the bakery, or what's left of it. When Cressida asks if either of us have been tortured, I'm so tired of explaining everything that I don't even think about it. I just pull my shirt over my head to show them the scars on my back. Punished for keeping my family fed, and I probably would be dead if not for Katniss and Haymitch intervening. Katniss face goes green and she looks like she might throw up. Instead, she takes off toward the Victor's Village, the one thing left standing. I want to go after her but Cressida's not done with me. She asks me about the whipping, about the Peacekeepers' idea of justice here in 12. Finally she's finished with me. I volunteer to get Katniss and take off after her.
I find her sitting on the floor of her kitchen, filling a box with her mom's herbal remedies and other medical supplies. She doesn't see me at first, and I watch her, silently, as she empties out the last of the cabinets. Soundlessly I walk over to the table, the same table where they brought me after the whipping. Where Mrs. Everdeen packed my back with snow-coat and where my mother kept her silent vigil. I laid here in agony until the medicine took its effect and numbed my body. And I laid here while Katniss touched me, penetrating the haze of medicine. And I laid here, body torn to shreds, when she kissed me. My body has recovered, but the pain still haunts me.
A/N: Sorry it's another depressing Gale-Mockingjay scene. He had a very rough time in that book. I think he gets a bum rap sometimes. I'm going to try to change things up, though there's still space in his Mjay story I want to cover.