Cave

Daenerys

Last week was not an easy time. The loss of two allies and no news from the Unsullied. Her frustration was reaching the boiling point. Instead she tried to immerse herself in day-to-day running of things on Dragonstone, although she felt she was always in the way of Tyrion and Missandei, and they both were too polite to say so.

The evenings became more pleasant than the rest of the day. She came to like Ser Davos. Some of the stories are really amusing and the rest is interesting. Through him she learns about that side of life in Westeros that she would never read about in the books written by Maesters. He is a good company but she also sees that he is trustworthy and loyal. She understands why Jon Snow relies on him so much.

As always she is the keen observer and Jon Snow slowly becomes less of a puzzle. She grudgingly admits to herself that she can clearly see why he inspired devotion from his people. And he finally started to call her 'your grace' without sarcasm. She likes his honesty, openness, straightforwardness and his smile. One thing she tries to avoid is looking straight into his eyes. She feels uneasy when she does. She cannot understand why. She stopped being shy and timid long time ago. Harsh life lessons taught her that. She may be wrong but she thinks she almost caught him many times looking at her intently. She is not sure what would be the reason, he does not look at her like other men did. Either with absolute admiration or distaste. Maybe he tries to get to know her better. Well, that is all right. The allies, as she is sure they will be some day, need to know each other. Sometimes she catches herself looking at him without any purpose, she wonders how he would look without this hair bun of his. But very quickly she snaps herself back to reality. It does not help for too long as she is almost haunted by his face when she tries to sleep. Her dreams are even more disturbing.

Both Davos and Jon Snow seem happier as yesterday they finally found the place where they can mine dragonglass. And this morning she was invited to see it for herself. She hardly sees the point but as she is bored she conceded.

As they walk towards the cave, Missandei mentions the Unsullied. Daenerys is pretty sure it is not the Unsullied themselves as Grey Worm Missandei is worried about. "He will come back to you," she tries to console her. "He'd better," Missandei replies.

Something in her voice made her stop. She asks if anything happened. "Many things," Missandei replies with a mysterious smile. Now she definitely needs some details. She always saw this bond building between Missandei and Grey Worm but apparently it just got tighter. They are interrupted by Jon Snow, so she makes a mental note to ask Missandei for details later.

They walk quite a bit along the beach, finally they reach the cave and after a few steps she goes into an enormous cave that glitters in the light of the torch held by Jon Snow. She breathes heavily now as she is amazed at seeing this. Nothing like anything she has ever seen before. Now she is glad Jon Snow took her there. He sounds very happy and he is actually smiling when he says that it is all they will ever need.

As she looks on the walls of the cave in wonder, he says that there is something else he wants her to see. He gives her the torch and points at the narrow passage leading out of the cave to the smaller cave. She goes first and now she sees signs carved into the walls of the cave, hundreds of them. Her breath becomes even shorter now as she sees the history presented in a simple way but history made by the Children of the Forest thousands years ago. The stories that she read just got real. She is overwhelmed.

"They were right here, standing where we're standing" she says under her breath. "Before there were Starks, Targaryens or Lannisters. Maybe even before there were men."

"No," he replies smilingly and goes further into the cave. Intrigued she follows. And then she sees the carvings of little creatures which she presumes are Children of the Forest and larger figures representing men.

"They were here together, the Children and the First Men," he says gently.

"Doing what? Fighting each other?" she asks.

She feels he is looking at her, then he comes closer and before she has time to react he gently touches her arm and directs her to the further wall of the cave. These carvings are more disturbing. They look like walking skeletons with spears and surprising blue eyes. Is that the Army of the Dead he was talking about?

"They fought together. Against their common enemy. Despite their differences, despite their suspicions… together" he says. She knows he alludes to her and his people, she knows he emphasises 'together' for a reason. She finally looks at him. She looks into his eyes she was avoiding for some time. She knows he tries to convince her that he was telling the truth. But there is no need as she knows now and believes him. There is, however, this nagging thought in her head that this is as good opportunity as ever to convince him that she is willing to help on condition that he bends the knee. A politician in her dulls the charm of his eyes and the sparking atmosphere that surrounds them, that she is not immune to. She comes closer again as in the throne hall to get her point through. This is the closest they ever stood together, and she is not remiss of noticing how beautiful he looks but she steels herself to remind him that his pride is less important that the safety of his people.

She must have struck the chord in him as he looks at her as he had never before and for a moment she thought he was going to kiss her. But he did not. He looked down and did not say a word more. She is almost breathless now.

She knows that she can achieve nothing more at the moment so she steps back and hands him the torch. She does not understand why her blood is rushing through her veins and there is this strange knot in her stomach so she walks slowly back to the main cave where they left Missandei and Ser Davos.

She turns her head to check if he is following her. He is but his face looks different as if something momentous happened. She does not know what it was. He looks shaken and so is she but her years of training to look regal help her to regain her composure.

He does not look at anyone, he just walks on to the exit of the cave. There is this strange pull in her to be close to him again. She joins him in silence.

Jon

The instructions he got from Sam were somewhat unclear. Ah, Sam, 'mountain of dragonglass, near the beach, not far from the castle'. Well, the description covered a large area, especially as they were not exactly sure what they were searching for. A mountain of dragonglass. These cliffs were just cliffs, there was no actual mountain. By sheer accident Davos spotted a cave, no doubt the habit from his smuggling years, and they decided to investigate it. When they saw the dragonglass, Jon actually laughed out loud from happiness. He startled Davos, "I never thought you could laugh."

Then he saw the carvings and his immediate thought went to Daenerys. She has to see it. They arranged to show her the cave on the next morning.

And there she is, walking slowly down the stone stairs with Missandei, followed by a bunch of morose Dothraki. She talks to Missandei and she smiles a lot. He likes her smiling, unfortunately she rarely or almost never smile at him.

Suddenly she stops. He cannot wait any longer, he is excited as a child. "Your Grace!" he prompts her. She gives him a quick look, stops the Dothraki and finally continues down. He watches her every move and nods when she reaches him. "It's not very far," he assures them half way. He is impatient to get to the cave, they walk too slowly for his taste.

He can clearly see and actually hear her amazement at seeing the cave. She does not gasp but she breathes heavily and in this light, surrounded by sparkling walls, she takes his breath away too. It is beyond comprehension that even though he sees her every day, each day he is almost surprised how perfect she is. He cannot take his eyes off her but he reminds himself that there is so much more to see. For her eyes only, he wants it to be special, "There is something else I want to show you, Your Grace."

He gives her the torch, she boldly goes first. He hopes it means she trusts him now, she left her Dothraki guards behind, she left Missandei and she is alone with him. This is only the second time they are alone. When in company he often forces himself to peel his eyes off her, many times unsuccessfully, and many times he is caught by her to his embarrassment.

She sees the carvings and it is quite clear that she is fascinated by them. He is happy. She reacts almost the same way as he did when he first saw them. "Children of the Forest made these," he says and is relieved that she does not ask him what the Children of the Forest are. She read her books, just as she was reminding him before of Torrhen Stark bending the knee for Aegon Targaryen.

"When?" she asks breathily.

"A very long time ago," he replies.

Gone is her regal stance, she says exactly what she is thinking, impressed that they stand in the same place as the Children. She wonders if it was even before the First Men, so he shows her other carving further down the wall.

When she sees the Children and the First Men she offers her guess that maybe they were fighting each other.

She stands so close to him. He could touch her if he dared. He looks at her looking at the carving, from where he stands she looks almost unreal; when she turns to him awaiting his answer, the need to touch her even for a moment is stronger than him, he takes her arm gently and steers hers towards the carving of Others. When he touches her his heart is beating so fast and loud that he is almost sure that she can hear it.

When she sees the pictures of White Walkers he tries to say it loud and clear that they fought together against their common enemy. She looks at him now and he knows she listens very carefully to what he is saying. "And we need to do the same if we're going to survive. 'Cause the enemy is real. It's always been real."

Now when he said what he wanted to say, he awaits her judgement. She looks at him for a long while. He swallows hard. It is only her and him now, she needs to decide.

"And you say you can't defeat them without my armies and my dragons?" she asks.

There is no time for word games, he needs to speak the truth, even if it is painful. "No, I don't think I can." He is at her mercy.

She steps closer to him. He is suddenly afraid but of not what she is going to say but of her being so close again and staring directly into his eyes. He holds his breath.

"I will fight for you," she finally says. "I will fight for the North…"

The wave of emotions sweeps over him. She believed him, she will help with the fight against the White Walkers. He is trying to find the words of gratitude. He could almost kiss her now.

Then she finishes her sentence, "…when you bend the knee."

He is crushed. He expected too much; she still does not realise how dire the situation is, his fealty is still the price for her help. He is too weakened by all those emotions within a short moment to fight her. The fight seems hopeless to him.

"My people won't except a southern ruler," he tries to explain gently. "Not after everything they've suffered."

She comes even closer to him, he can now smell her foreign perfume, it is intoxicating and he can hardly breathe.

"They will if their king does," she almost whispers, her voice makes him feel dizzy. "They chose you to lead them. They chose you to protect them. Isn't their survival more important than your pride?"

It is a shock to his whole body. He recognises his own words to Mance Rayder. Words fails him and he just looks at her in astonishment.

He has to break the eye contact, he looks down. Thoughts are just buzzing in his head. He said the exact words to Mance. Mance did not bend the knee. Mance kept his honour intact. His people did not see him kneel. But Mance is dead. As many of his people.

She leaves the cave and he follows her. But he is unable to gather his thoughts. He just walks towards the exit.

She surprises him as she joins him. And they walk very close to each other, in unison, in silence. It seems strange but the thought of them walking together gives him comfort.

Only when they see Tyrion and Varys on the beach, they quickly look at each other. He thinks some bad news is coming and wonders if she thinks the same.

Daenerys

Those two! They always seem to bring her bad news these days. She is furious now. How could this all happen? She had the biggest army Westeros has ever seen. She has three dragons. She has the smartest Hand of the Queen. She has the best Master of Whispers. And yet her own army loses men for no real reason, to get an empty castle. Her fleet is attacked again. And no one notices a huge Lannister army marching through Westeros on High Garden. What is the use of Varys?

Ser Davos offers that maybe they would rather discuss the things amongst themselves. Tyrion apparently agrees but she has had enough of this. "You'll stay!" she almost barks an order. "All my allies are gone. They've been taken from me while I've been sitting on this island."

Tyrion tries to persuade her to commit further to the plan as this is the right plan. She nearly explodes at this. "The right plan?!" she stops and faces Tyrion. " Your strategy has lost us Dorne, the Iron Islands and the Reach.

Tyrion mentions underestimating our enemies but she interrupts, "Our enemies? Your family, you mean. Perhaps you don't want to hurt them after all."

In silence that engulfed everyone, she hears her children crying in flight, she looks towards them, as do others except Tyrion, for once not looking at them admiringly.

"Enough with the clever plans," she says. "I have three large dragons. I'm going to fly them to the Red Keep."

Tyrion tries to intervene again but at the moment she is beyond listening to him. She needs advice. Her gaze finds Jon.

"What do you think I should do?" she asks him in a calmer voice. He tries to extricate himself from the situation, but she interrupts him, "I'm at war. I'm losing," she says walking towards him. She asks him again. He does not reply at first. She looks at him pleadingly. He seems to understand.

"I never thought the dragons would exist again," he says calmly after a while. "No one did. The people who follow you know that you made something impossible happen. Maybe that helps them believe you can make other impossible things happen. Build the world that is different from the shit one they've always known. But if you use them to melt castles and burn cities, you're not different. You're just more of the same."

She knows he is right. She does not know him well but somehow she trusts him to give her a good advice. Both Jon and Tyrion react badly to her original plan. She needs to make a new plan. Herself. As she did in the past, she listened to options and she came up with a third one, her own, the one that worked.

She looks again at her children and then she walks slowly back to the castle, deep in thought, followed by others in silence.

Jon

He thought previously that he had seen her angry. He had not. This is angry. She is fuming, almost screaming. Well, she is the dragon after all. She is so tiny, so delicate, yet nearly everyone trembles in fear of her. Despite the circumstances he cannot help himself admiring her spirit. He is just glad her rage is not directed at him. Usually always in tune with other people feelings, Davos tries to make her let them leave but, oh boy, did he pick the wrong time. She orders everyone to stay.

Jon just looks at Davos as if to say 'not a word more', he feels very uncomfortable. It is like listening on the family quarrelling. Tyrion attempts to calm her down but he is shot down immediately and perfunctorily.

When she stops, everyone freezes; she is so ferocious that Jon even takes a step back. He understands her anger, many a time he lost his temper and he knows it is better to wait it out, as the sudden anger quickly subsides and dies down, but if you stir it up, it burns even brighter. Tyrion stirred it up. Now she is talking of burning the Red Keep. It is not going well.

Then she asks angrily, "What kind of a queen am I if I'm not willing to risk my life to fight them?"

"A smart one," Tyrion replies.

'Well, that's me told, I suppose,' Jon thinks. But he is stunned again, this is frighteningly similar to what he said to Ramsay Bolton to challenge him. And this does not escape him.

This is the third time she says almost exactly the words he had already uttered. First, in the throne hall, she asked not to be judged by the sins of her father, then she quoted him word for word in the cave, and now this. 'Are we so alike?' he asks himself. Well, she is definitely prettier. Even now, raging, she is beautiful, terrifying but beautiful.

Just as he thinks he might have underestimated his understanding of her anger, she startles him by directing the question at him. He quickly looks at Tyrion who is very unhappy at the moment, to put it mildly. Thus his response is partly reconciliatory, "I would never presume to…" He is interrupted by her. She walks towards him, looking very earnestly into his eyes. "What do you think I should do?" she asks again in her normal voice. This time he pays attention and he clearly sees the plea in her eyes. The thought that she even considers consulting him because she evidently trusts him, she lets him see her vulnerability, ties a knot in his stomach.

He gives her his honest opinion and even if it is essentially the same as Tyrion's, she listens to him. He can see it, she listens very intently. She seems to accept what he is saying. She looks again towards the sea and her dragons. She looks desperate and strangely very alone. Even if he just saw her rage, his heart goes to her. He sees her dilemma. Cersei can do whatever she wants because everyone already thinks she is mad and cruel, Daenerys must find a longer route to avoid herself being judged just because her father was the Mad King.

Daenerys

Tyrion was not happy with her plan but he reluctantly agreed that it is the smart way to go. She thinks he felt punished by being forced to go with the Dothraki on the ships. In a less than a week they should get to the Reach and start their pursue of Lannister forces. She looks at the ships leaving the island from her window in the War Room. She is alone. For once.

She hears the steps approaching and she sighs. Not a moment of peace. She takes a sip of her wine.

"Your Grace?" the deep voice of Jon Snow makes her turn. She is not entirely annoyed by this interruption. "The ships have left but Missandei said you were not there. Did you change your plans?" he asks gently.

"No. I'll join them later." She is surprised at herself that she shares the strategy with someone who is not an ally yet.

He looks like he does not understand, "You are joining them after the battle?"

"I am the battle, Jon Snow," she says and smiles quickly seeing him speechless. "I'm flying on Drogon later." She turns back to look at the sea. She is aware that he still stands there yet he is silent. He is looking at her, she knows it, his eyes are almost burning her skin.

"Stay safe, Your Grace," he almost whispers and leaves the room.

Once again she turns her head to look after him.

She finds it dangerous to look into his eyes for too long.

Jon

She flies away on a dragon. She flies. He looks at the quickly disappearing figure in the sky. He does not know what he was thinking earlier but when he saw her on the dragon his mouth flew open. He does not know why but he is afraid of something. Being close to her in the cave disconcerted him a lot. He thinks about her way too much. At times he seems to forget why he came here in the first place. This is dangerous, she is dangerous. He steels himself to stop thinking of her and focus on his purpose. It is quite sunny day here on Dragonstone again, and he shudders when he imagines what weather is now like at Winterfell. Sansa wrote about her plans to gather resources. He had his share of disagreements with her but now he appreciates she is there, preparing the North for the Long Night. At times he is desperate when he thinks of the things to come.

"Have you seen enough, Your Grace?" Davos asks.

"Yes, let's go," he replies grumpily, avoiding Davos's smiling eyes very carefully. He is afraid that Davos sees too much.

Once again they are on the bridge as they are heading towards the cave where the mining is in full swing.

"What do you think of her?" asks Davos.

"Who?" Jon knows exactly what Davos means but he tries to deflect as much as possible. He is not a match for Davos though who sighs tiredly.

"I believe you know of whom I speak."

"I think she has a good heart," Jon offers.

"A good heart?" Davos challenges. "I've noticed you staring at her good heart."

He likes and appreciates Davos immensely but at this moment he would have preferred Davos not being that straightforward. Especially as he just promised himself not to think of her again. "There's not time for that," he says brushing the stubborn thoughts aside. He cannot lie to Davos. He needs to convince Davos and mostly himself that all he thinks about is his mission. "I saw the Night King, Davos. I looked into his eyes. How many men do we have in the North to fight him? Ten thousand? Less?"

"Fewer," corrects Davos.

"What?" he asks confused.

But Davos is already on a different or rather previous track of mind, "And speaking of good hearts, Missandei of Naath."

Is it his imagination or Davos took an extreme liking to Missandei?

As she addresses him 'Lord Snow', Davos tries to correct her but he is doing it so inefficiently that Jon has to interrupt.

Then the conversation about bastards and customs ensues which he thinks it is better to interrupt again. "Why did you leave your homeland?" he asks Missandei.

She explains that she was a slave, because she was stolen from her island. Jon feels uncomfortable that he asked. As there were no slaves in Westeros for ages this concept hardly ever crossed his mind.

Unperturbed, Missandei explains that Daenerys bought her from her master and freed her. 'She does have a good heart' Jon thinks. He is reminded of what Tyrion said to him about her, that she protects people from monsters. He thinks that he really underestimated her. Missandei is, like the Unsullied, grateful for her freedom. Is this it? They follow her out of gratitude?

For some reason Davos challenges Missandei, implying that although she was freed, she now serves her queen now. Missandei's reaction startles him, she is adamant in saying that she serves because she wants to serve and she believes in her queen. Surely she would prefer to go home. "And if you wanted to sail to Naath tomorrow?" he asks.

"Then she would give me a ship, and wish me good fortune," she replies calmly.

This is all too good to be true, surely. "You believe that?" he asks incredulously.

"I know it," Missandei replies with conviction, staring hard at Jon as if he offended her queen and she is not happy with the fact. "All of us who came with her from Essos, we believe in her. She's not our queen because she's the daughter of some king we never knew. She's the queen we chose."

Well, that is some other type of queen then. He thinks that he really does not know much about her apart from what he saw himself. This testimony of a loyal, dedicated and fierce protector of Daenerys is worth thinking about. But then he promised himself not to think about her anymore.

Not an easy task. His dreams are full of her. 'She is your battle, Jon Snow,' he tells himself.

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