I don't own Marvel or any of its characters. If anything, they own me.
Unfortunately, our internet is being shut off; this will be the last update for quite a while, but I'll do my best to figure something else out. In the meantime, I thank you all for reading, and hopefully I'll be able to find another job and pay my damn internet bill.
Life after 'The Battle' was anything but normal. Not only were there now five immortals living in Stark Tower (five and a half, technically), now the truth about Tony's past with Loki had come to light and everyone was in a different stage of processing this.
Steve's world-view had been turned on its head—again. Not only was it difficult for him to understand the concept of two men together (born and raised before the Fifties, remember?), but it was even harder for him to understand Erika's conception (he was barely getting used to magic—shape shifting and gender swapping were light-years ahead of what he could handle).
Bruce remained a neutral party, understanding that it was Tony's business and nobody else's who he slept with. His only comment was a word of caution to Tony that the Loki he knew then probably wasn't the Loki he knew now.
Natasha had made no comment, but now she watched Erika like a hawk.
Speaking of hawks, Clint had made one or two inquiries as to whether or not Erika was even human; that didn't go over too well and it ended with Jormungand and Fenrir threatening to disembowel him.
Out of all of them, though, Thor was the worst. He didn't trust Jormungand, Hela, or Fenrir, and now that distrust was branching out towards Erika. Erika had really liked Thor—she'd been happy to have an uncle, even if he didn't know he was her uncle.
Having Hela and Jormungand around was nothing new, but showing Fenrir how everything worked was starting to wear Erika out. Every Midgardian thing she showed him was 'beneath him.'
Except for the Xbox.
Like his siblings, he took an immediate liking to it and demanded to be shown all of the games available for it (even the ones for little kids). It had taken Erika almost two weeks to finish Bioshock Infinite (and she'd had a head start, since she'd gotten it a week before its official release date), but Fenrir beat the game, found all the easter eggs, finished all the side quests, and unlocked all the achievements in thirty-six hours.
"Holy crap, you're one hell of a Gamer," she said after he informed her he'd beaten the game, and she worked on finding something else for him to play.
"Is this tower not inhabited by other mortals?" Fenrir asked one morning as he once again found Erika alone in the kitchen.
"Yeah, but I think they're kinda freaked out right now," said Erika, offering her half-brother a cup of coffee, which he gladly accepted (he preferred it black while Jormangund and Hela added sugar and creamer—the amount of CoffeeMate Jormungand used was insane). "Steve, Thor, and Natasha look at me like I might bite someone, Dr. Banner probably wants to run tests on me, and Clint won't even talk to me," she sighed.
Fenrir frowned slightly and Erika could tell he was trying to put those names with the faces of the people he'd met after the battle. "Don't hurt yourself," she said with a small smile, stirring her coffee and taking a sip. "Hopefully they'll get over it."
"Is it not better for them to fear you?" Fenrir asked, clearly confused. "Intimidation is an advantage, after all."
Erika snorted. "Believe me, I know; it only bugs me because . . . ." she trailed off, trying to find the right words. "I've been around these people for a while—they only started acting like I had two heads after the fight."
Fenrir tilted his head slightly and frowned. "Have you talked to Father about this?"
Erika shook her head. "There's not really anything he can do about it."
Their conversation paused as Dr. Banner came into the kitchen looking more tired than Erika had ever seen him. He didn't even acknowledge them—he just grabbed an apple from a bowl on the counter and sat down at the kitchen table, focusing his attention on the StarkPad he had with him.
Fenrir finished his coffee, placed it in the sink (one day she was going to get it through his thick skull to rinse out his own damn mug), and tilted his head towards Dr. Banner in a 'here's your chance' motion before leaving the room. Erika let out a huff of air and went to rinse out her and his mugs. She turned the water off and turned around, studying the doctor for a minute before saying, "Alright, cards on the table."
Dr. Banner looked up from the StarkPad. "Hmm?" he asked absent-mindedly, as if he'd only just noticed there was someone else in the kitchen.
Erika held open her hand and an apple disappeared from the bowl and reappeared into her hand—she was getting better at this magic stuff. "I know how scientists think, okay? I'll bet you're just dying to see what makes me tick."
Okay, she was being kind of a bitch, but to be fair almost a week of nobody talking to her was making her a little moody.
Dr. Banner looked confused for a moment, but then realization dawned on him. "You think that because I know you're Loki's daughter, I'll want to study you," he said in an 'ah-ha' voice, then turned fully in his chair and rested his elbows on his knees. He gave her a tired smile. "Erika, I think you're forgetting something," he said gently.
Erika's head tilted to the side.
"When I'm angry, I turn into when your father calls 'an enormous green rage monster,'" he continued. "Believe me; I've got no right to judge anyone."
Erika's gaze dropped to the ground and she bit her bottom lip. When she looked back up, she was smiling slightly. "The Hulk is pretty cool," she said.
"Well, to be honest, I'd prefer something a little more controllable." Yep, he was definitely looking a little more worn out than usual.
Erika sat down beside him. "Is everything okay, Dr. Banner?" she asked, concerned for the gentle doctor's health—for a good reason, too.
Dr. Banner took off his glasses and massaged the bridge of his nose. "Your . . . . Loki's been letting Tony and I run some tests, to see if there's a way around Odin's spells that are binding his magic, and so far that magic is prevailing over science." He slid his glasses back on. "What I don't get is why his powers never came back—Thor told us about how he was banished here, and how sacrificing himself for that little town restored his powers. Loki essentially sacrificed himself for Tony, but he's still powerless."
Erika shrugged. "Maybe it was because he did it for a selfish reason. At least, I think sacrificing yourself for love is selfish."
Dr. Banner's eyebrows lifted. "And why is that?" he asked, and Erika could almost taste his curiosity.
She shrugged again. "Love is a selfish emotion—you do things for love because you want to protect them, and that's your only reason for doing it. Thor was protecting an entire town—Loki was only protecting someone who meant something to him."
Dr. Banner let out a small 'huh' and typed something into his StarkPad. "So, in theory, if her were to protect someone for purely non-selfish reasons, he'd get his magic back."
"Only in theory, but unless he's put into a situation where he has to save people, I don't think that's gonna happen."
The wheels in Dr. Banner's mind were turning—Erika could practically see them. "A situation where he'd have to help people . . . . ." He said thoughtfully, and then he said a quick goodbye and hurried out of the room.
Erika blinked. "Nice talking to you too," she muttered to the now-empty chair.
"You want Loki to join the Avengers," Tony deadpanned. "Yeah, that's real funny, Brucie, we're all busting a gut here," he said, turning back to his monitor.
"Tony, I'm serious," Bruce pushed. "He's still got his strength and he's trained to fight—he could help."
"'He' is still in this room and would appreciate it if others did not pretend otherwise," Loki spoke up, still hooked up to one of Tony's machines from their previous tests.
Bruce gave him a quick apology before focusing on Tony again. "It would be protecting people for non-selfish reasons—exactly what Thor had to do to get Mjolnir back." He put his hand on Tony's shoulder. "This could work."
Tony sighed. "You're the last person I'd expect to hear this from—the first person being myself—but I know better. Loki's not exactly a team player." He turned to Loki. "No offense," he added.
Loki did not look offended, so Tony took that as a good sign. He turned back to Bruce and asked the Million-Dollar question: "What made you think of that, anyway?"
Bruce hesitated and glanced back towards Loki, then back at Tony. "It wasn't my idea; only someone with your mind could think up something like this," he said quietly, then gestured to Loki. "Well, your mind and his," he added.
Tony looked confused.
"For a genius, you can be incredibly dense," Loki commented.
"Hey, nobody asked you," said Tony, frowning at the taller man. "And what the hell is that even supposed to mean?"
Loki rolled her eyes. "It seems as if Dr. Banner had been conversing with our darling daughter," he said dryly.
Tony's eyebrows shot up. "Erika gave you the idea," he asked Bruce flatly. Bruce nodded. "Okay, obviously that kid hasn't spent enough time with her mother to know that's a terrible idea."
"Why is it so terrible?" Bruce questioned. "Nobody has to like him in order to fight with him—he doesn't even have to fight," he insisted. "How many times have we needed someone with that strength to rescue civilians from a turned-over bus, or from a collapsing building?"
Tony stared intently at Bruce. "You're seriously considering this, aren't you?" he asked.
Bruce nodded.
Tony scrubbed a hand over his face, then turned on his heels and gave Loki a half-smile. "I guess it would be polite to ask the man in question himself, so here goes nothing—How would you like to be an Avenger?"
Loki frowned. "Do I have a choice?"
"Yep."
"Will you actually acknowledge my choice if I choose not to?"
"Probably not." Now that Bruce had said something, the idea of Loki as an Avenger wasn't leaving him alone and wouldn't leave him alone until he saw said idea come to life. "Bruce has a point—everyone here already tolerates you, and that's better than how this team started out. Plus, you kicked some major Chitauri ass last week," he added.
Loki thought about it for a few silent moments, and then opened his mouth to give Tony his answer.
Steve, Clint and Natasha were not happy the next time Tony spoke with them. They were beyond not happy, in fact, especially Clint.
"Are you seriously saying you offered that fucker a spot on our team?" Clint asked incredulously. "Because if you're serious, I may just have to punch you. Did you forget what that little shit did to half of Manhattan—"
"While having his mind controlled by his own Glowstick of Destiny, if I'm not mistaken."
"—Not to mention what he did to Coulson—"
"Who is alive and well on his way to a speedy recovery."
Clint took a deep breath through his nose. "Stark, if you say one more word I'm going to punch you in the throat," Clint warned.
"Wow, you're seriously not letting the whole 'mind-control' thing go, are y-hrrk!" Tony gagged and doubled over, coughing and clutching his throat while Steve restrained Clint.
"That's enough, both of you!" said Steve. "Now, look—we've had a lot going on in the last six months, and we're all still on edge from the fight last week. Everyone just needs to take a deep breath and calm down."
"Steve's right," said Bruce, and that made Clint take a few more deep breaths—nobody wanted the Other Guy joining the conversation. "Clint, I know you still have trouble coping with what happened to you, but I thought you were adjusting," he continued.
"Yeah, I was adjusting to having that bastard living in the same building as me—nobody said anything about having to work with him!"
"Did just fine last week," Tony wheezed, his voice rough. "Christ, Barton, that hurt." He coughed again. "What, so it's okay for you to make a different call, but nobody else can?"
"At least when Natasha joined S.H.I.E.L.D it wasn't because I was fucking her!" Clint spat.
Tony should've kept his mouth shut, but his mouth said, "You sure about that?" before his brain could stop it, and he ended up with a bloody nose.
The conversation was put on hold due to Tony's broken nose and Clint's storming out of the room, followed by Natasha.
Tony was cleaning the last of the blood from his face when Loki found him. The taller man took the washcloth from Tony's hand and finished wiping the last few specks of blood from Tony's upper lip. "Barton will burn for this," he murmured.
"S'not my first bloody nose," Tony muttered. "I can deal."
Loki laid the washcloth down and carded his hands through Tony's hair. "He will not get away with harming what is mine," he said before capturing Tony's mouth in a bruising kiss. Tony melted against him. God, he really needed to get laid; he hadn't had sex in months, not since Pepper—
Pepper.
Shit.
Tony tensed up and broke the kiss. "I can't," was all he said, shaking his head slightly and taking a step back. "Loki, I can't."
The look on Loki's face was a mix of hurt, confusion, and anger. "Do you not remember the relationship we had?"
"No, I remember, I just—"
"Do you no longer desire me?" Loki interrupted, his voice raising in pitch.
Tony gave a humorless laugh. "No, that's not . . . . No. In fact if I didn't, this would be a lot easier," he sighed, gesturing for Loki to sit down, and when Loki didn't move Tony sighed again and said, "For Christ's Sake, Loki, just sit the fuck down and let me try to explain!"
Loki still made no move to sit.
Tony raised his arms in defeat. "Alright, fine, don't sit—whatever." He closed his eyes and took a deep breath.
"You were gone a long time. Things change. People change, sometimes for the worse." He looked at Loki then. "When you . . . when I thought you were . . . dead—"
"But I am not dead," Loki interrupted. "I'm here, and if you care at all for me as I still care for you then I see no problem in—"
"I'm trying to tell you why it's a problem!" Tony persisted.
Loki frowned; he was confused and he did not like being confused. "Explain, then," he demanded.
Tony groaned in frustration, taking a few steps back and scrubbing his hands over his face. "I'm trying!" He took another deep breath. "I fell apart after I lost you, okay?" he admitted. "There! Is that what you wanted to hear? I drank myself numb and I started smoking again, and I didn't take care of myself." He paused, ashamed of his next confession. "I wasn't there for Erika. I gave her everything in the world, but I paid her about as much attention as my old man paid me." Tony swallowed the lump in his throat. "It hurt to look at her and see your eyes, so I stopped looking. I was in a dark place, especially after I was abducted and nearly killed in Afghanistan, and this woman—this beautiful, brilliant woman pulled me back up. We've been together for a few years now; it's the most stable relationship I've had in years, and I can't just . . . . I can't . . . ."
Loki shook his head. "I don't understand," he said quietly.
Tony swallowed. "You were gone a long time, Loki. Hell, I thought you were dead."
"But I am not," said Loki, just a little hysterical at this point. "What happened then, what I had to do—none of it matters now because—"
"Because what?" Tony snapped. "What, just because you're here now, ready to play one big happy family with us lowly mortals, until you get bored and decide to leave again?"
"Odin demanded that I leave you, there was nothing I could do!"
"Oh, don't even pull that crap with me! What, just because Daddy tells you to—"
"That man is not my father!" Loki practically screamed.
"Well then, that's just so much better! I'm really glad to know that we meant so fucking much to you! Well guess what—too little too late! I'm in a healthy, stable, normal relationship, and I'm not giving that up just because you decide you wanna pick up where we left off! Cards on the table, what's the worst that could've happened if you'd refused, huh? A slap on the wrist? Grounded for a few centuries?"
"He would have killed you!"
Silence fell. Loki continued, not even bothering to hide the tremor in his voice. "Had I not done as instructed and altered your memories, the Allfather would have killed you, and had he known about Erika he would have either banished or killed her; the choice was mine—either leave you behind, or watch you die." He shook his head, moving quickly and capturing Tony's face in his hands before Tony could move away. He swallowed, tears flowing freely down his cheeks as he brought Tony in for another kiss, this one softer. They broke apart and Loki swept his thumbs over Tony's cheeks.
"Due err minn skuldalið, min blóð ok hjarta. Ek elska due, Anthony Edward Stark, eða ek am trauðr við missa due."
Tony let out a shaky breath. "I have no idea what you just said."
Loki kissed him again. "You are my family, my blood and heart. I love you, Anthony Edward Stark, and am unwilling to lose you."
Tony's breath caught in his throat and for once, he had nothing else to say.
Translated using this website:
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