Author's Note: This next chapter is being written on my brand new computer! :D YAY! It's all pretty and new! Enjooooooooy! :D
Rose's Point of View
We stopped in Alaska next. We were being delayed because of some snow. They apparently had to wait until it was safe to fly again. I just hoped it was before the sun went down. We didn't need the additional stress of worrying about Strigoi. I let out a sigh. I'd elected to stay on the place, mostly to avoid everyone; though it looked like they had stayed too. We had food, drinks and a bathroom to use, so I guess there was really no point leaving.
I glanced around, noting that Adrian was asleep. Lissa and Christian were deep in conversation, both laughing and smiling goofily at each other, and Dimitri sat alone, reading an old western novel. I smiled at that, though I didn't know why. It's not like it was something we had in common or anything. Personally though, I could see the allure of all those hot cowboys...although I doubted Dimitri was reading it because of that.
I let out a deep breath, glancing out the window.
When I turned back I was startled to realise my surroundings had changed. I could faintly hear Lissa and Christian talking. I could feel the seat beneath me...but I wasn't there. I sat in the gym back at, and my hands sat in Dimitri's. He'd bandaged them but was still holding them. I wasn't sure if he noticed. I certainly did. His were warm and large, with long and graceful fingers. Fingers which might have played the piano in another life.
I heard my voice, felt my feelings, kind of like the way I experienced Lissa's feelings while I was inside her head. I could feel my mood darkening as I thought of the rumours about Jesse. I looked down, away from Dimitri's eyes, "I know you heard what people are saying, that I-"
"I know it's not true," he interrupted.
His immediate, certain answer surprised me, and I stupidly heard my voice again, questioning it. "Yeah, but how do you-"
He cut me off again, "Because I know you." He said this firmly, "I know your character. I know you're going to be a great guardian."
A warm feeling formed inside me at his confidence. "I'm glad someone does. Everyone else thinks I'm totally irresponsible."
"With the way you worry more about Lissa then yourself..." He shook his head. "No. You understand your responsibilities better than guardians twice your age. You'll do what you have to do to succeed."
I thought about that, or past me did anyway while I intrusively watch the scene folding out in front of me. "I don't know if I can do everything I have to do."
He did that cool one-eyebrow thing. I'd always wanted to learn how to do that.
"I don't want to cut my hair." I heard myself elaborate. It was one thing I'd always worried about, but I'd never told anyone about it. It seemed superficial and vain worrying about my hair.
He glanced at me, puzzled, "You don't have to cut your hair. It's not required."
"All the other guardian women do. They show off their tattoos." My voice replied. I was shocked to see how...connected I seemed to be to Dimitri. It was like I trusted him as much as I trusted Lissa. I was confiding in him. I didn't do that very often.
Unexpectedly, he released my hands and leaned forward. Slowly, he reached out and held a lock of my hair, twisting it around one finger thoughtfully. I froze, both present and past me, and for a moment there was nothing going on in the world except him touching my hair. Suddenly he let go, looking a little surprised and embarrassed at what he'd just done.
"Don't cut it," he said gruffly.
Somehow, past me remembered how to talk again. "But no one'll see my tattoos if I don't."
He moved towards the doorway, a small smile playing over his lips. "Wear it up."
Suddenly he disappeared, and the gym around me did as well.
I cleared my throat, feeling effected by the memory. I'd loved him, even then. I could feel it in the memory. He had affected me more than any guy ever had. With him I felt a link, a connection...and it was...weird. I noticed suddenly that Dimitri was standing in the aisle next to me, an odd expression on his face. I realised suddenly that he'd probably been trying to talk to me.
"Uh," I shook my head, trying to rattle the memory away, "Sorry, I was...lost in thought."
He gave me a small, suspicious smile, "I asked if you wanted a drink."
"Yes, please," I attempted to smile back. I felt guilty for some reason, like I'd been caught doing something I wasn't supposed to be doing.
Dimitri returned with a coke for me and a glass of water for himself. He sat in the seat beside me, and my heart started beating a little faster recalling the way he'd made me feel in the memory. I tried to breathe without making it obvious. How could he have this effect on me now when just a few hours ago I'd been fine?
Ignorance is bliss. After discovering just how much I'd loved and connected to Dimitri before...well now I felt awkward being around him. I had no idea what had happened between us. I didn't know how far things went, or how many people knew about us; suddenly I was struck by the absurdity of erasing my memory. It might've take away the pain...but it just left me confused and completely unaware of everything that had occurred between us.
"So," Dimitri finally broke the silence which had quickly mounted between us, "How much have you remembered?" He gave me a knowing look when I went to deny knowing anything.
I let out a sigh, "A few things. Scattered memories." I didn't want to discuss this yet. I needed to remember more. What if something terrible had happened? I didn't want to talk to him now, and like him - or worse, love him - and then get my heart broken all over again when I remembered whatever it was he did.
"Like what?" He pried. He seemed genuinely concerned.
"A plane ride," I provided, "The maze; and a conversation about my hair." I shrugged, as if these memories were insignificant somehow. Truthfully my mind was reeling. They were each so different. I didn't know when they had happened, I just know they did; and Dimitri had been in each of them. That meant the person chasing me through the maze had been him.
Dimitri sighed, a small smile tugging on his lips, "I remember that conversation." His voice was low, and his Russian accent faintly coated his words. I felt my heart rate increase once again. Four words, so simple, yet when he said them they held so much raw emotion that it was...just wow. His eyes locked with mine, and once again I could see the depths of his love for me.
"I'm jealous, you know." Dimitri continued; his voice low and husky. He leaned closer to me, "I wish I could forget everything that happened between us like you did." I was a little surprised, and oddly offended, at his words. I knew he'd done something bad, and I knew I'd erased him from my mind, but it hurt thinking he'd want the same. I still couldn't believe I'd actually done that.
"Why?" I found myself questioning. I was sure I didn't want to know, but I asked before my mind could register the words leaving my mouth.
"Because," He smiled, keeping his voice low, "Then I could fall in love with you all over again." My heat seemed to lurch. I was lost for words. I felt like if he just reached over and touched me; my whole body would explode from the tension building between us.
I turned away, feeling a blush creep upon my face. This guy was…intense. I didn't know whether that was a good or bad thing yet.
I think we were all relieved when we finally landed in . We still had to travel some more though, but it was good to finally get out of the plane and be able to move again. Lissa kept casting me worried looks, like she thought I'd drop to the ground any second. Everyone seemed tense, actually. Even Adrian, who usually had a carefree attitude about everything, kept glancing at me like I was a bomb waiting to explode.
I almost scoffed when I realised they were waiting for me to remember everything and fall apart. I'd clearly fallen apart when whatever happened occurred, and now they thought I'd fall apart all over again. I thought I was stronger than that; when I remembered I would be fine, even if I had to fake it. And if worse comes to worse, Adrian could always just take away the memories all over again; he could keep doing that forever...then I'd never have to remember a thing.
We were walking to the train station.
Dimitri was pointing out building after building and we all got wrapped up in the beauty of it all. The architecture here was so amazing and colourful. Buildings were like works of art, and I could have looked at them all day.
"They're pretty." I smiled, stopping next to Dimitri.
"No," he looked utterly serious, "They're beautiful."
Something about the way he said that sounded so familiar. I glanced at him in confusion, and suddenly, like on the plane, everything and everyone around me disappeared. Everyone except Dimitri.
He was suddenly closer to me. One of his hands moved up the back of my neck, twining his fingers in my hair and tipping my face up to his. He brought his lips down, barely brushing them against mine.
I felt myself swallow, and then my voice spoke, sounding distant to my ears, "Do you think I'm pretty."
He regarded me with the utterly serious expression I'd seen on him moments ago, "I think you're beautiful."
"Beautiful?" My voice questioned, sounding small.
"You are so beautiful, it hurts me sometimes." He replied. His lips moved to mine, gentle at first, like the kiss on the plane. The kiss turned hard and hungry. His hands on my arms slid down, down to my hips, all the way down to the edge of my dress. His strong hands gathered the fabric and began to push it up my legs. I felt myself tremble; melting into his touch, into his kiss and the way it seemed to burn against my mouth. His hands kept sliding up and up, until he'd pulled the dress over my head and tossed it on the floor.
"You...you got rid of that dress fast," I said between heavy breaths. "I thought you liked it."
"I do like it." His voice replied, husky; his breathing was as heavy as mine. "I love it."
The memory faded, leaving me gaping and red-faced in front of the buildings in . I couldn't believe what I'd just seen, or experienced...remembered. As far as I knew I was a virgin; did I have sex with Dimitri? I felt embarrassment was over me as Dimitri noted my expression.
"The lust charm?" He questioned, eye-brows raised in amusement.
I flushed. Did he really know me that well? Or had I been reciting the lines of the memory along with my past self. I gave a curt nod before quickly turning away. I couldn't even meet his gaze now after seeing that memory.
"How far did...it go?" I questioned, not meeting his eyes.
"Not far." He answered. I could hear a smile in his voice.
"Did we...ever?" I forced myself to ask. I had to know.
"Yes." He replied, "Once."
Once. That was odd. If I'd loved him so much, and if he'd felt the same way about me, then why was it only once? Maybe it had been horrible...horrible enough that I wanted to forget him and everything that had ever happened between us. I almost asked why, but then I realised I so didn't want to know. I'd had sex! I had sex with a Russian god and I had no recollection of it.
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