A/N: I apologize for the wait, but this site has been troublesome for me these past few days - along with current festivities invading my life -. I did have this chapter done for Christmas, but I had other things to attend to that day, so I apologize yet again.

Reviews are welcomed

and happy holidays. :)

(Near P.O.V)

Christmas made its way around again, but it wasn't particularly my most favourite holiday. My sisters did leave me in a forest before said holiday, but it's what got me to the Wammy house so I couldn't complain too much.

Mello was out of the hospital wing of the house before Christmas, but he was tired most of the days that followed. Mainly due to the heavy drugs. Matt was there to help him though, and he didn't push me away when I tried to help, which made me happy. I'd like to think it was a Christmas miracle that Mello would actually accept help from me. But the day had only just gotten started.

As a treat, L's top three students – Mello, Matt, and myself – got to spend Christmas at his side the entire day. He did of course get us presents, but just being by his side would have been enough. Although, I'm almost too sure L favoured us over everyone else. A little more on Mello's side than mine or Matts. But there was still that brotherly love for all of us.

The day was spent mainly in Mello and Matt's room. Mello himself was too tired and sick from the drugs to really move around, so he stayed in bed. He didn't even care that I was in his vicinity, he just wanted to rest. He only opened one present, and that was the one Matt had gotten him; a chocolate bar bigger than his own ego. Matt seemed touched that Mello fought through whatever pain he was in just to open up his gift. Even I grinned at it.

I would never tell Mello this, but for a while I had been observing him and Matt's relationship. It would seem Matt cared more for the blonde than he would like to admit. It wasn't even considered "Brotherly" anymore. I'd even go as far as saying the red-head loved Mello. But, maybe I wasn't seeing things correctly. Maybe my jealousy was just over crowding my judgement.

Yes, I could admit it. I was jealous of Matt. He barely had to do a thing to get Mello's attention, whereas I had to make the blonde angry enough to yell at me for attention. It was frustrating some days, knowing I couldn't do anything to change how he saw me. But then… it was always frustrating. No one liked me at the Wammy house. No one but L and the other adults. And that's why I turned to Mello. He wasn't liked much either, so I thought it made us akin of sorts. Stupid me.

Mello was in and out of sleep at this point and Matt openly debated on drawing on his face with a marker. L had to stop his thoughts from becoming reality, a talent when dealing with Matt, but I stayed silent. I didn't like anything that had to do with pranks. Mainly due to my sisters pranking me in their own little ways. Lipstick while I slept, putting a black-light in my room so my hair would glow. And my favourite, neon pink in my shampoo. Lord how I hated pranks.

I decided to focus on Mello again. His breathing had slowed down to a steady pace, signifying sleep.

"He's really not feeling well, is he?" I asked.

"No," L replied. "I'm afraid he's not. I can't explain why, but he's definitely not well. That's why we're here. Just to make sure everything stays… calm."

Matt nodded. "I wish I could help."

"You've done all you can do, Matt. Just trust that everything will be fine. Now come on," he said as he stood up. "I need someone to help set up lunch for sleeping beauty here. I'd ask Watari, but I promised him the day off."

Matt stood, but I didn't. "You two go. I'm… too deep in thought."

L just walked away with a slight shrug, but Matt commented with, "Remind me to use that excuse next time I wanna stay in my room and play video games."

As they left, I heard a soft grumble come from the bed.

"Where are they going?"

I said nothing for a few seconds before gathering up the courage to speak. "To get you some food."

Mello shifted his hazy eyes toward me. There was no anger or resentment in them. Just exhaustion. "Okay then."

He closed his eyes again and we drifted into an uncomfortable silence. I had thought he'd fallen asleep again, until I heard him say, "You're too quiet."

I looked at him again to see his eyes on me once more. "I'm sorry?" I asked.

The blonde shifted his head to a more comfortable spot. "I'm not used to silence. Not when I sleep. Matt snores like an elephant on acid; stupidly loud. But even before him there was always something for me to listen to. It was mostly my father's drunken parties, but it helped me sleep. Don't know how though."

"Some people need noise to sleep to. It helps them feel secure. Like they're not alone in the world. I read about it in our psych course."

Mello hummed. "Makes sense. For me at least. I don't know what I'd do if I ended up alone."

Was this really happening? Was he… talking to me? No, it must have been the drugs. He probably didn't even know what he was saying… though I'll never forget it. "What do you mean? I'm sure you'd do fine on your own."

"Believe me, I wouldn't. I swear, if I lost Matt or L I would probably lose my mind. Even you mean a lot to me."

I was shocked into silence. Had he honestly said that? Why would he?

"Do you honestly mean that, Mello?"

He nodded lazily. "I mean, I don't like you. I don't think I ever will. But if I lost you, I'd lose the drive to become the best at Wammy's. So, despite everything I feel, Near, I truly do need you in my life. You're like… a little brother, almost. Smarter, and one I don't particularly like, but a younger brother, nonetheless."

I honestly don't know what came over me. I just jumped up and hugged Mello as close to me as I could. He didn't push me away either. He even hugged me back, as lazily as it was, and grinned a bit.

I believe that was the only time Mello ever announced his feelings about me. I knew they were the truth, drug induced or not, because of the way he looked at me. He didn't have anything that resembled an ounce of anger or hatred. Something in him just couldn't keep the truth from flowing.

Of course, he didn't remember a word of what he said. In fact, after that day, he returned to his normal, anger-driven, self. But I remembered every word. I still remember them. It was the best thing I'd ever had the pleasure to hear from the blonde.

Officially, it was the best Christmas gift I received.