Since my cousin won't let me play Trickster Online in peace, here's more of…

GIVE ME YOUR SOUL!

Naruto: Ninja Burger Chronicles

Scroll Seven, Part Three: In the Boom Boom Room.
By Kaori

"Weapons Research and Development?" parroted Sakura. "But, we're in the fast food business..."

Yari and Myoko, who had returned with a large table on wheels covered with an even bigger sheet, shook their heads in unison making tisking noises and wagging their index fingers at the rosette.

"My dear girl," Kitadake said, in a tone usually reserved for teachers scolding particularly dense children. "we are ninja first and purveyors of fine fast food second. Anyone who tells you different is a damn liar!" he paused and then added. "And probably a samurai." He shook his head in disgust. "But on to more pleasant topics of conversation..." he then nodded to his two assistants who pulled the sheet off with a flourish, revealing an assortment of potentially lethal devices.

Naruto eagerly skipped over to the table, his two compatriots following him more cautiously.

"Hey, do you think I could get some of those Wasabi Powder Specials?" he asked eagerly.

"Oh Naru-honey we've got something even better than that!" smiled Myoko, picking up a black ball the size of an orange from the table. "Say hello to the Wasabi Powder Special Mark II!"

"I thought we agreed on calling them Super Sneezies." Pouted Yari. Myoko ignored her.

"We've added ten percent more gunpowder, thirty percent more wasabi powder, and put in a touch of horseradish for extra kick."

"Ooh! Gimme fifty!"

"I'd love to, but you're only authorized to carry fifteen."

"Who's gonna know and since when do you care?" pouted Naruto.

"True. So that's fifty WPSM IIs..."

"Super Sneezies!" corrected Yari and was again ignored.

"..for you, what about your teammates?"

"I'll stick with the fifteen." Sakura said.

"I'll take fifty." Sasuke nodded, and picked up what looked like a feather duster.

"Careful with that." Kitadake warned. "That's no ordinary feather duster."

"Looks like one to me." Snorted Sasuke.

"Oh? Yari, would you give the boy a demonstration?"

Yari deftly snatched the feather duster out of Sasuke's hand and walked to the only open space in the lab; Myoko set up a test dummy in front of her sister and hurriedly got out of the way. With a bored expression on her face she started "dusting" the air in front of her. Suddenly a cyclone whipped the area in front of her and threw the dummy into the wall with enough force to leave it embedded in the reinforced steel wall.

"That dummy weighs two hundred and fifty-five pounds. Still think it's just a feather duster?" Sasuke shook his head, while Sakura rushed to get the tornado generating feather duster from Yari.

"We originally developed that for the janitorial detail, but since then it's been given to ninja who have to disguise themselves as maids to make deliveries." Shrugged Myoko. "It's not nearly as impressive as our mustard bombs."

"What's so special about a sock full of mustard?" blinked Sakura, confused.

"Not that kind of mustard bomb!" Yari rolled her eyes. "Sheesh, what do you think this is, summer camp?" She picked up what looked like a bright yellow bowling ball. "This is a mustard bomb."

"The contents only looks like mustard though." Myoko pointed out. "You have no idea how hard it is to get hydrochloric acid to have the color and consistency of normal yellow mustard. It's guaranteed to burn the hell out of anybody it lands on!"

"Oooh! Gimmegimmegimmegimme!" Naruto jumped up and down.

"Not so fast, boy." Kitadake said. "It's still in prototype phase. We haven't figured out how to avoid getting caught in the explosion. No one's taking that out of the lab until it's safe to use...relatively speaking. Now come on, we still have to get you properly outfitted."

In the end, each of the young deliverators were given fifty WPSM IIs, garrotte wire, two pirate cripplers (stolen from the Precious Roy Home Shopping Network warehouse).

Naruto had also taken the liberty of stealing a few extra things on his way out.

"All right, company picnic here we come!" he cheered.

Next chapter: walking the plank, swinging from the yardarm, keelhaulin', and other such piratey nonsense.