Since my cousin won't let me play Trickster Online in peace, here's more of…

If you wish to hum the theme to Mission Impossible I won't stop you. I will however, give you very stern looks.

Naruto: Ninja Burger Chronicles
Scroll Eight, Part One: Special Delivery
By Kaori

Making their way to target area was not going to be easy, especially seeing as they had no transportation. Fortunately for them, the gods were feeling generous and they ran across a Samurai Burger delivery van in the process of being hijacked by Pirate Pizza employees on their way to terrorize some poor pizza delivery person.

While the two groups fought, Sasuke, Sakura, and Naruto took the opportunity to carjack the van, throw the contents out the window, and drive off.

Sasuke was driving the van while Naruto and Sakura were "tagging" it with Ninja Burger logos. During the drive it became more and more apparent that Sasuke was an even worse driver than Itachi (which is nothing to be proud of under normal circumstances), after running over two policemen, seven street performers, and a nun in thirty seconds. Unfortunately for Sasuke, he'd never get acknowledged for this since he shouldn't have been driving without a license.

Unfortunately, they soon discovered that driving all the way to their destination was going to be impossible.

"Why the hell is there a lake in the middle of the city?" Naruto demanded.

"Now I see why this is pirate territory." Sighed Sakura. "Water water everywhere...we're gonna need a boat."

"Not a problem, we'll just take that one."

Sakura and Sasuke looked over to where Naruto was pointing and whistled appreciatively. Their blonde friend was pointing at an impressive forty-foot yacht.

"I say, it's a splendid day for boating isn't it Muffy?" a gentleman in a very cliché sailing outfit said to the bored-looking teenage girl sunbathing a few feet away from him.

"If you say so daddy." Yawned Muffy. "I'd much rather be shopping with mother if it's all the same to you."

"You don't like spending time with your papa?" the man seemed to be on the verge of tears, and Muffy sat up in alarm. He sniffed. "WAAAGH MY DAUGHTER DOESN'T LOVE ME! I'VE FAILED AS A FATHER!"

"Oh no, no daddy I didn't mean it that way, please don't cry!" she hugged him and rubbed small circles on his back.

SPLASH.

"What was that?"

"Hm?" sniffled the man. "What was what dearest?"

"I thought I heard a splash." Said Muffy.

SPLASH.

"I definitely heard it that time."

SPLASH. SPLASH.

"I say, that is peculiar." The man said.

Things got even more peculiar when he was suddenly thrown overboard.

"YEEK!" SPLASH. Muffy joined him in the water. Looking around, it seemed that the crew and wait-staff had already been tossed into the drink.

"What is the meaning of this?" the yacht's owner sputtered. Three heads popped over the side of the railing.

"Sorry about this but we need to borrow your boat for a bit." The pink-haired one called from the deck.

"Here, have some coupons on us!" the blonde threw a small bag, which was caught by Muffy. "We're kind of in a hurry but we'll make sure to let the coast guard know you're out here. Bye!"

And with that the boat sped off towards the island in the centre of the lake.

"How come you get to steer?" groused Naruto.

"Because Sakura's reading the map and we don't trust you not to run aground or crash into other boats." Said Sasuke.

"This from the guy who drives like he's in a demolition derby?" Sakura threw a sextant at him. "OW!"

"Don't mock Sasuke-kun!"

Now, this being pirate territory, their little hijacking operation didn't go unnoticed. A dinghy full of pirates on their way to raid a pizza delivery witnessed the whole thing and came to the (incorrect) conclusion that the three kids were on their way to a make a delivery. This could not be allowed. This was Pirate Pizza turf, and no one but Pirate Pizza pirates would be making any deliveries in this area. And since they did not deliver burgers, the pirates decided that the ninja intruders would have to be disposed of.

"Sailing, sailing over the bounding main...OUCH!" yelped Naruto.

"Stop that singing!" yelled Sakura. "I can't concentrate."

"But I'm bored and you guys won't even let me see if there's anything cool to play with!"

"You want something to play with?" Sasuke deadpanned. Naruto nodded eagerly. "Then go play with them." And he pointed towards the starboard side of the yacht where a pirate ship was heading towards them. Naruto facefaulted. That wasn't what he had in mind.

Giving a long-suffering sigh, he got on deck and prepared to repel all boarders.

"There be the vessel, yaarggh." Quinn the Engorged, first mate of the pirate ship Anchovy. As the captain, Reeking Barney, was busy trolling for wenches Quinn was in charge of the attack on the ninja who dared to pillage ships in pirate territory. "Hard to port and prepare to board her!"

"YAAAAAAARRGGH!" roared the crew.

"Oi, Quinn. There be someone on the deck." Randal Cutler, one of the older pirates observed. "And it be the most hideous shade of orange at that."

"It matters not what colour it be, what be it is what I'm askin'." Spat Jack Brat the Younger. Jack Brat Senior, nodded.

On the deck of the yacht, Naruto was quietly freaking out. What the hell was he supposed to do against a pirate ship? He was going to die and his co-workers don't care! They sent him out here to die an ignoble death against a horde of pizza snatching, pirates! He could hear them yelling to prepare the cannons.

"Oi!" he heard a gruff voice call. "It just be some stupid looking ninja kid! Never mind about the cannons lads, it'd be a waste er ammunition!" That got a hearty laugh from the rest of the crew.

Stupid looking ninja kid? Surely they weren't talking about him. They can't possibly see Sasuke or Sakura from that position. Was someone else on the yacht?

"Daft brat be jus' standin' there. Bring the ship in close and I'll lop of 'is ugly 'ead!"

Naruto twitched as the ship came in close, the pirates throwing their grappling hooks onto the rails of the yacht laughing and jeering at him.

That did it.

The scene that follows is too graphic for this fanfic, so it shall instead be replaced by Team Gai doing the Macarena.

Five minutes later...

Naruto, looking dishevelled but otherwise fine, re-entered the cabin.

"Did you take care of the pirates?" Sasuke asked, not even glancing in the other boy's direction.

"Yeah, they won't be bothering anybody anymore." Replied Naruto.

Outside the Coast Guard was unhappily fishing pirate body parts out of the lake; this task was complicated by the fact that they had to separate quite a number of the body parts from other body parts and pieces of the destroyed pirate ship. The incident would later be known as The Five Minute Massacre.

Sorry for the delay guys, I was distracted by Air Gear and Soul Eater scanslations...