This would have been done sooner if I hadn't acquired a ludicrous amount of writer's block for this story. That and my finding out just how addictive Patapon can be; DAMN YOU SONY!!

Naruto: Ninja Burger Chronicles

Scroll Ten Part Two: Instant Replay

By Kaori

Thanks to the wonderful device known as the high-speed camera, we are able to see just what transpired in the ridiculously short space of time. So without further ado here's the (abridged) footage.

After the sound of the gong, two thirds of the competition was immediately wiped out. The cause? A combination of a cayenne pepper cloud created by Gaara to traverse the tower on, Sasuke and Naruto (both wearing gas masks) using wasabi powder bombs, and Temari's Fan-the-Flames no Jutsu that she was using to literally rise above her competition.

The racers who survived the assault did so by either outrunning the powders (i.e. Lee and a ninja from the Kumogakure franchise), simply refusing to let it bother them (as in the case of Hinata, a ninja from Kusagakure franchise, and four ninja from Amegakure), or being used to such things (the six other ninja from the Sunagakure franchise).

Up the structure they all leapt. Well, with the exception of Gaara who didn't even bother trying to deliver his food and simply went to the top of the tower. Once there, he stripped down proceeded to get a suntan.

One of the Amegakure deliverators was the first to find his designated window. Or so he thought. The window he actually found had a simple illusion cast over it and upon entering he was immediately thrown out by a gleeful Mitarashi Anko.

Temari and Sasuke strangely enough had matching numbers and had arrived at their window at the same time. Immediately they got into a fight as to who would be the one to make the delivery only to be knocked off the tower by Rock Lee.

Lee dispatched quite a bit of the competition in this manner; preferring to search each and every window for the correct number, sticking his head in to confirm that he had a match and immediately run off when the person inside tried to grab him and throw him off the building.

Hinata, had spotted her window almost immediately thanks to her family's secret Spot-And-Drop Deliverator techniques. Basically, Neji was on the ground with a pair of binoculars and a wireless headset telling her where to go. She made her delivery and was climbing out the window within a minute and seventy seconds. Unfortunately, she was unable to dodge Lee when he suddenly passed her by.

Naruto managed to escape being knocked off the tower by Lee by diving into a nearby window...

...straight into the arms of the Ninja Resources bear inhabiting the room. He spent the remainder of the race being mauled.

Lee's remaining competition, Spaisu no Gaara, was perfectly happy sunning himself on the roof of the building and the only impediment he served was to almost trip the green-clad deliverator while he was making his way towards the finish line.

All of this took place in less than five minutes.

Gai was exceedingly happy about the result and grabbed Lee into a tight, asphyxiating hug when he results were announced.

Sasuke sulked about his loss while his fangirls attempted to kiss away his numerous boo-boos.

"I can't believe I lost to a hot sauce eating, thick-browed, unitard-wearing, freak." He growled.

"You can't believe it?" Temari, equally miffed, snorted. "I'm never going to hear the end of it from Kankuro."

"The same Kankuro who got his assed stuffed full of potatoes?"

"Ah, good point."

Neji patted Hinata on the head comfortingly. "Cheer up, at least you managed to make the delivery. In fact, you were the only other person to do so, so you got second place!"

"I...suppose." sniffed Hinata and then found herself crushed in heaving bosoms.

"Oh Hinata are you okay!" Kurenai cried. "Did Gai's barbarous student harm you?"

"Mmmphah!" gasped Hinata, freeing her face before she suffocated. "Kurenai-sensei, I'm fine, really."

"Thank God! If anything happened to you I'd never forgive myself! You're my only ray of sanity in this den of lunatics!"

Hinata didn't really know what to say to that. Thankfully the loudspeaker provided a distraction.

"Attention everyone. Will all participants competing in the Miss Ninja Burger competition please come to the staging area?"

"At last my time has come!" roared Sakura. "There is no way I can lose this!"

"Have you looked in a mirror lately?" Ino snorted. "You'll be lucky if they even recognize you're human with a forehead like that. You are human? Right?"

"Strange words coming from a farm animal."

"FARM ANIMAL? HOW DARE YOU, YOU FLAT-CHESTED WHORE!"

"TAKES ONE TO KNOW ONE! AT LEAST I DON'T STILL WEAR A TRAINING BRA!"

"OH THAT'S IT YOU ARE GOING DOWN!"

"BRING IT, SLUT!"

"This, is gonna be good." Giggled Gaara, startling everyone as they hadn't realized he had come down from the tower. Well that and...

"WOULD YOU PUT YOUR CLOTHES BACK ON!" screeched Temari.

Deliberately short chapter no jutsu! Next chapter is the start of the Miss Ninja Burger Competition? Who is the fairest one of all? Who will win the crown? And will Gaara put his clothes back on?