(Mello P.O.V)

It was a sunny day at the Wammy house that afternoon. We had all gotten let out for recess, but I wasn't too into playing with the others that day. Besides, some whiny kid threatened to tell Roger I hit him in the head with a football. Jesus, some kids were just kiss-arses. It was pathetic.

When I was alone near the middle of recess time, Matt had run up to me holding a camera. It kinda went downhill from there.

"Mels!" He huffed. Had he been searching for me? "I need your help."

I cocked an eyebrow. "I may regret this, but with what?"

"Well, you know how I'm in photography for my extra credit class, because L suggested it'd be better for me since all I do is play video games and…?"

"Yes, Matt." I interrupted. Dear lord, could that guy talk. "I remember."

He smiled happily. "Okay, so I was wondering if you'd let me take some photos of you. Ms. Karen says I need some profile photos to put in my portfolio to get a good grade."

I strode past him, a small grin playing at my face. "I don't think so, Matt. I'm not exactly photogenic. Why don't you ask Near?"

"Near's busy." He said as he followed me.

"With what, his toys?"

"… well… yeah. But that's not the point. Seriously Mel, I need these pics. Please help me, I promise not to make you look chubby or deformed in any way."

I rolled my eyes at him. "Matt, I already said no. Besides," I paused for a moment, "every photo I take, I look like a girl."

"You do not. You look like a Mello. Now come on and help me. I'd do it for you."

"Because you love the attention." I said as I turned to him. "Honestly, you've photo-bombed almost every picture taken at Wammy's. I'm surprised you haven't been caught yet."

"… That's not the point. The point is, help me! Or do you want me to fail and become an outcast in the orphanage? Doomed to be nothing more than a shadowy figment of everyone's imagination, and to forever wallow in the underscores of society, like trash that is to be never picked up. For, you know I'm there, and you will feel my presence, but no one shall ever recognize me as more than a…"

"Alright! For god sakes, I'll help you! Just stop with the overdramatic mental sequence."

"Good, because I haven't got a clue as to where I was going with all that. Now, SMILE!"

The first flash of the camera stunned me a bit, but the rest was easier to ignore. I had to shield my eyes a few times, but other than that I posed when asked, and smiled throughout the entire session. Of course, it helped that Matt was being… well… Matt.

"Dahling, you look fabulous! A real Star!"

I smiled at his attempt towards… whatever you call eccentric directors, as he moved around franticly in front of me. Turning his camera left and right, up and down, each second a flash of white burned at my retinas.

"Are you quite done?"

Matt cocked his head to the side. "Sweetie, I know you didn't just say that."

"Cut it out," I chuckled as I pushed him. "I swear, something is not right with you."

"Yeah, but you love me anyway. Besides, I got some great shots. Check it out!"

He pulled my head into his arms and started flicking through some pictures of me, but I quickly snapped away from him.

"Uh, I don't think so. Besides, recess is almost over. We should head back."

Matt only shrugged. "'Kay."

We walked side-by-side towards the orphanage. Yes, we got stares – and the occasional homophobic slur – But I ignored it. Well… I tried to, anyway.

I loved hanging around Matt. I loved being beside Matt, having him close to me, and having an actual bond with someone. But, I didn't like the teasing that came with it. I didn't like being called a fag because I had a male friend, or the rumours centered on our friendship. Most of them were started by the older kids, but it didn't help that the younger kids believed it.

I guess when you're fourteen, close to fifteen, you really had to pay attention to how you acted. Otherwise it was misconstrued as something indecent. Like, for instance, I had used to hold Matt's hand when I was younger – if anything, to make sure he was always beside me – but that had stopped when I turned twelve and I noticed people whispering about us. Matt hadn't cared… but I did.

Of course, it really didn't help when Torrik decided to be more vocal about it.

Like that same day, for instance.

Not even a second after we entered the room, he started up. "Jesus, guys! You gonna go at it again? Wasn't last night enough?"

"Go fuck yourself, Torrik."

He and his buddies lifted their hands in defence. "Whoa, no need for that! It's not our fault you two weren't silent enough last night."

I rolled my eyes. "Seriously? Do you guys have nothing better to do than to make shit up about us?"

"Make it up? Please! Just come out of that closet, Mello. I heard all the bumping around and giggling last night. Seriously, you may wanna tone it down."

At that moment, I really wanted to glare at Matt. Had it not been for him and his stupid pillow fight…

I sighed. "Whatever. You losers can go suck ass for all I care. You aren't worth my time."

I strode away from them, catcalls and vulgarity becoming more distant. When I knew I was out of their sights I lowered my head. I hated the teasing, and I knew it would all stop if I ditched Matt. But I couldn't bring myself to even entertain the idea of losing him. He was my best friend.

"I'm sorry." I heard the red-head say quietly.

I turned as I stopped. "For what?"

He shifted his feet a bit. "I know they pick on you because of me. I also know you'd be better off without me…"

"You know, there are days I want to hit you for being so stupid." I interrupted. "Matt, we're best friends. Nothing they say or do will come between us, I promise you that."

His goggles fogged up a bit. A very clear sign he was crying. "It already has, Mel."

I took a step back. "What? That's ridiculous…"

"Mel, we used to hang out twenty-four/seven, were partners in every gym class, and always sat next to each other. Now, I barely see you outside of class, and anytime I do you try to get away from me. I know my presence bugs you, and I know it's because of me that you're getting teased. So, just say it. The two of us being friends is nothing more than a problem."

Had I really been ignoring him? Was I really pushing him away from me? No, not him. I couldn't… I wasn't…

But I had.

I'd been slowly pushing him out of my life because of all the teasing. Because even I was afraid of our friendship. How could I have been so stupid? Oh god, and Matt! I'd been unconsciously hurting him and not noticing. God, I was such a moron!

I suddenly felt his camera being placed in my hand. At my curious look, he explained.

"I lied. I didn't need a profile photo for my class. I just… wanted to spend some time with you. That's all. Sorry."

'Quit apologising! This is my fault!' I thought as Matt turned from me, wiping away a few tears under his goggles.

"I'll… I'll go away."

He took a step but I grabbed his hand to stop him. When he looked at me, I almost cried.

"Please don't."

I hugged him so suddenly and tightly, he hadn't had time to react. He simply stood there in shock.

"I know I'm not the best guy to be friends with," I began, "but I need you in my life, Matt. I'm sorry for ignoring you, I promise to stop that. Just please, please, don't ever go away."

He took a long time to answer me, but when he did…

I felt warm arms wrap around me lovingly. "I promise, Mel. I'll always be there for you."

I hugged him tighter, I smile on my face. I loved Matt with all my heart. Had I had let him walk away… I didn't even want to think about it.

When my mother had forgotten me, when she replaced me… I felt so torn. The one person who had made me happy in life, the woman who had loved me and made the pain disappear, had forgotten me. I felt so beaten up by that, that I felt like I was slipping away.

Then… Matt brought me back.

He reached into the depths of hell and took my hand, bringing me back into a safer world. And soon, it was just him that I needed. He had become my anchor, the one person I loved more than anyone or anything. To hell with my mother! She wasn't half of what Matt was! Matt was everything to me… and I never forgot that.

Once our hug ended, and I was back to my old self, I grabbed his hand and started walking to our next class.

"Mel, people might stare." He whispered.

I looked back. "So let them."

His smile was like sunshine to me. For once, I set aside my pride to make him happy. Besides, I missed holding his hand.

We were a few steps away from our class, when Roger suddenly appeared, Near right beside him. The look on his face spoke dread and sadness. I really did not like that look.

"Roger? What is it?"

"Please come with me, Mello. There is… important matters to speak about."

My heart dropped. His voice… it was so cold. So sad. He'd never sound like this before. I think even Near heard it as well.

I looked at Matt, then back again. "Alright." I let go of his hand, but leaned in to whisper. "I'll tell you back at our room."

He nodded, then walked into class. He looked just as worried as I did.

Roger then led us down to his office which was a few doors down the hall. Each step felt colder than the last. Almost like I was being led to my death. I felt sick and tired, but full of worry. Something wasn't right… and I worried for the worst.

We finally entered his office, the eerie silence making me even more ill. Near quietly sat on the floor contentedly, but I stared at Roger as he sat at his desk. His eyes were heavy, full of sorrow. Something wasn't right. I felt it. I felt the cold essence of dread hang over us.

My heart gave a jerk. "What is it, Roger? Why are we here?"

I hadn't prepared for this news. Not in a long shot.

(One hour later)

I had completely destroyed my room. Nothing lay unbroken. Not even Matt's stuff. The only thing I hadn't broken was his stupid games, and that was only because it was too difficult to do so. How could this have happened?

He promised me. HE PROMISED ME! That Kira would be caught, that he'd be executed. But he's dead! He died! HE WAS KILLED! MURDERED! WHY HIM!?

I threw another of my things at the wall. I wanted to scream and yell and make the whole orphanage aware of my pain. Unfortunately, I was too angry to even do that. I was angry that L was dead, that's he'd been killed, that he hadn't chosen me as his successor, and that I had given up an opportunity to catch Kira. In short, I was furious.

I heard the door open. "Holy fuck, dude!"

Matt. Guess I did tell him I'd talk to him there. I didn't put all this into account though.

"He's dead." I said bluntly.

Matt looked at me. "Who?"

"L, dipshit!" I yelled at him. "L's dead! Kira murdered him!"

He took a step back. "What? But he's… no, he can't be. He's never…"

"He is." I said more calmly now. "And he hadn't chosen a successor, so I let Near take over. It was either that, or work with him. And…"

'And even though I promised L I'd take care of him… he still broke his own promise. Why shouldn't I break mine?'

Matt made his way over to me, careful not to step on anything. I suppose he noticed my pack off to the side. "Why you got that out?"

I looked right at him. "Because I'm leaving, Matt."

"What? Why!? Where are you going? Why do you…?"

"Because I have to. I can't stay here, Matt. I need to be somewhere else, and just… figure stuff out. Please try to understand."

Matt suddenly kneeled down. "I'm coming with you…"

"No, Matt. I… I need to do this alone."

"But Mel…!"

"I'll come back. I promise you that. But, for right now, I think it would be best that I just… leave. Wammy's has too many memories for me right now. Too many memories of L. And I need time away from it all.

"Please… please try to understand."

His goggles fogged up a bit. "I'll… I'll try. But please come back. If you don't…"

I leaned up and pulled him into a hug. "I promise. I'll come back. If not, then I'll contact you. We'll be together again. But, for right now, I need to be alone."

He nodded. I could feel in the tenseness of his body that he was holding back tears. This was going to be the first time I'd truly left his side. And we didn't know how long it would be until we saw each other again. Truly, this was a hell on wheels for both of us.

I didn't stay to clean up the mess I'd made. I simply grabbed my stuff – clothes, books, small but important things – then headed for the door. Matt followed me until I hit the gate. It was then that I hesitated, not wanting to leave Matt, but I swallowed my fear and ran for it. I didn't even look back at my red-headed friend. I was too afraid I'd break down and cry. I needed to get this over with. To rip it away like a band aid.

But that hurt worse.

I left Matt that day. Alone. Friendless. Sad and scared. I knew all this, and yet I kept running. I prayed that he would break his promise. That I'd look behind me and see him following close behind. But once I was a mile or so away, I realized the sad truth; I was alone.

Once again,

I was painfully…

Alone.

A/N: Well, there you have it. Now, I've mentioned before about making this a two-parter but, then again, the rhythm of this story is nice. I would like an opinion on whether or not to continue on from here, or to make a second part. Seriously guys, I can't make decisions like this (I'm kinda useless) So, an opinion would be nice.

Well, other than that, enjoy the chapter.

Reviews welcomed :)