To The Journey
Disclaimer: If you recognize it, it's not mine. This is an AU story.
Chapter Fifty-Nine: Moving Forward
"Really, such a tragedy. We'll have to reschedule as soon as -"
"Lwaxana!" Tasha shouted finally, her voice echoing off the walls of the transporter room, forcing the Betazoid woman to stop mid-sentence. "Lwaxana, before you do anything, we need to talk."
She fixed Tasha with an odd look. "Okay. About what?"
The blonde sighed. "About Deanna. If you approach her like - well, like you were about to, I don't think it'll end well."
Something about the younger woman's expression made Lwaxana realize that whatever the situation, it was deadly serious. "Why? What's happened?"
"Sit down." She guided Lwaxana to the edge of the transporter pad. "How much were you told about what happened over the last few days?"
"They told me you were diverted to Romulus and then attacked by a crazed Reman." She gave an exaggerated shudder. "What did they leave out?"
"Lwaxana -" she hedged. "Are you aware that the Remans are a telepathic species?"
She gave Tasha a what-kind-of-question-is-that look. "Of course."
She swallowed hard. "I'm sorry, Lwaxana, there's no easy way to explain this. The same Reman who attacked the Enterprise also telepathically attacked Deanna."
The Betazoid's eyes widened. "Attacked her how?"
Tasha dropped her gaze to the floor, no longer able to look Lwaxana in the eyes. "He...he used his telepathy to simulate a sexual assault on her," she said finally. "There was no actual contact, but -"
"But it was real to her," Lwaxana finished in a pained voice. "My poor little Deanna."
Tasha reached out and gently squeezed the woman's shoulder. "She does need you, Lwaxana. If anything, she needs you more than ever. But she needs you to comfort and protect her, not to make a fuss over the missed wedding or anything else."
"Of course," she replied, her voice now soft with understanding. "Of course. Thank you, Tasha." She reached out to hug the younger woman, and Tasha let her. "And to think I once accused you of not caring enough about her. For a telepath, I certainly did a bad job of reading you."
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Deanna had no sooner opened the door to allow her mother access than she was swept into a warm embrace, held tight against her mother like a small child. Hurting as she was, she found she didn't mind. She felt safe in her mother's arms.
There, there, Little One, Lwaxana murmured telepathically to her daughter. It's all right, you're safe now. That awful man is gone, and I'm here.
What Deanna gave back in reply wasn't words so much as a jumble of thoughts and feelings. Pain...fear...shame...guilt...it all hit Lwaxana in a rush, just as her daughter buried her head in her jacket and burst into tears.
"Oh, my darling Deanna," Lwaxana whispered out loud, using the telepathic link to send a wave of love and comfort and protectiveness towards her. "No, no, none of this is your fault, Little One."
They stood there for almost an hour, Deanna sobbing for all she was worth, Lwaxana holding her and offering both verbal and telepathic comfort. Only when she had quieted did Lwaxana guide her exhausted daughter to her bed.
"Sleep now, Little One," she urged. "It's okay. You're safe. Mother's here."
As sleep overtook her, Deanna thought that she just might believe her mother.
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"You are angry with me." It wasn't really a question, but the android phrased it as one.
"I don't know what I am with you right now," his wife replied sharply. "But, yeah, angry is a good place to start."
He pressed his lips together slightly, a very human gesture he'd picked up mostly from Tasha herself. "I expected as much," he admitted.
"Why?" she asked finally. "Why did you do it, then, if you knew what it would do to me? You know full well how many times I've nearly lost you, and how I've reacted each and every one of them!" She paused a moment, swallowing hard. "But at least those times, I knew...I knew it wasn't your fault. You were a victim of circumstance and bad luck. But this time - you ran off to kill yourself, Data! How am I supposed to respond to that?"
"I cannot answer that," the android replied. "But I can tell you that what I did - what I meant to do - it was only because I felt I had no choice."
"To save the Captain," she said bitterly. "A life for a life. Don't you understand? You matter just as much to us as he does. And he didn't want you to do it either. You should've seen him. He was devastated at the thought that you had given your life to save his."
"It was not his life that I was concerned with."
That brought Tasha up short. "What?"
"If I had been alone, without family, then perhaps I would have given my life solely to save Captain Picard. But as it was, saving him was only an afterthought to me." He raised a hand to her cheek, caressing it gently. "We had no way of knowing if the Captain had succeeded. When the weapon continued the activation sequence, I feared that he had failed, that everyone on board the Enterprise would be killed. You are correct that I was willing to trade my life for another, but it was not the Captain's life that I meant to trade mine for. It was yours." He dropped his head, squeezing his eyes shut against a sudden rush of tears. "You and our child. More than anything, I could not let Shinzon kill you."
Tasha shook her head and let out something halfway between a laugh and a sob. "How do you do it, Data?"
"Do what?"
"Say exactly the right thing so that I can never stay angry with you." She embraced him. "I guess I didn't realize just how close it really was."
He buried his head in her shoulder. "And I am grateful just to be here with you."
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Ensign Jessica Marinette couldn't help but think that the entire situation was vaguely ridiculous. What exactly was the purpose of having a senior staff meeting with almost half the senior staff missing? But, she figured, as the lowest-ranked member of that same senior staff, she'd have to get used to being overruled as often as not.
As the ranking officer, her own supervisor Dr. Hill took the seat at the head of the table, and Jessica could tell that he felt a little ill-at-ease with this himself. "Okay, people," he said after a moment. "I know this is a little...unusual, but we're still the senior staff of the Titan, and it's our responsibility to keep things running smoothly regardless of the presence - or lack thereof - of the Captain and First Officer."
"I think this ship could practically run itself," the Operations Officer commented, "especially sitting here in drydock. All we're doing is routine checks and making sure nothing breaks down. Which it hasn't."
"That may be so, Mr. Mathers," the Chief Engineer, a dark-skinned Vulcan, replied evenly, "but it is still our responsibility to maintain."
"Besides," Jess added, "if what I know about Starfleet is any indication, there will come a time when we were back looking for things to do because we were so bored."
"Easy for you to say," he shot back, but he was smiling. "At least you've got routine crew physicals. I've spent entire shifts staring at a console, waiting for something to happen."
"Enjoy it while you can," a new voice said. "I guarantee we'll all have more work than we know what to do with soon enough."
"Captain!" Hill exclaimed, and everyone in the room jumped to their feet.
"As you were," he replied with a grin. "All except you, Mr. Hill. You're in my seat."
"Yes, sir!" the CMO replied, but he was smiling too, clearly used to bantering with the man who had become his Captain. Without a word, the entire senior staff moved down to allow space at the head for Riker and the two other officers who had followed him in.
"I'm Captain Riker," he said as he sat, "though I'm sure you all knew that. My first officer, Commander Dax, and Chief of Security Commander Worf. Our ship's counselor will be coming aboard in a few hours. Now, I believe Mr. Hill was about to ask for a status report from all departments?"
Things are starting to settle down for the crew, and it's about time, isn't it? One more chapter and then we'll move on to the sequel.
George Mathers is a character from the Voyager novel Pathways, in which he is Harry Kim's roommate. I considered creating a new character for the role of operations officer but it was easier to tell the story with one that had already been established.
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