A/N: OMG, I'm SO so sorry I just „disappeared" and didn't go on posting the story. Real life is just really, really stressful for me right now (and also for my RPG-partner, so for both of us) and I literally forgot to update… I hope, I will be able to post at least weekly again from now on, but I promise, I'll do my best…
Thanks to SlyterinQueen for your message, that really meant a lot to us, and we're happy there's at least one person still wanting to read our story! :-)
Enjoy Chapter 48!
Alex Karev POV:
"I'm telling you, April, this is the best way to go" Alex said as placed an arm around her shoulders and led her towards the gynaecology wing. He knew that she didn't mind, and even kind of liked Hemsfield, but the man's rigid methods left Alex uncomfortable.
Looking up at him April nodded her head. "I just wish you let me know what's going on." She sounded nervous.
Returning her gaze Alex smiled down at the woman "It's good, I promise"
"I trust you" April told him and the words warmed Alex's body.
Walking up to an office at the end of the hall Alex gave two quick knocks and pulled April closer. Once the door was opened April's face beamed as she looked up to see Addison smile and greet them.
"Dr. Montgomery?" April said "What are you doing here?"
"Well" she started "I got a phone call from Alex here and he seemed pretty adamant that I make my way down here and when Alex is adamant about anything I find it a good policy to just go with it"
Alex gave an embarrassed laugh "They don't call me a bulldog for nothing"
"Come on in" Addison told the two and stepped aside to let them in "Chief Hunt has given me privileges so I can help you for as long as you'll have me"
April walked in and turned around "I hate to think I'm causing you to put your life on hold for me" she said and Addison gave a wave of the hand "Not at all" she told April "I was more than ready for a new environment and I'm getting to connect with some old friends"
"We really appreciate this, Addison" Alex said "Dr. Hemsfield is-"
"A fan of the old method" Addison responded "we used to get in our fair share of disagreements about the correct form of treatment. He's a great doctor, but he tends to rely on methods that are more than just a bit outdated"
"Exactly" Alex said "that was when I knew I had to call the best"
"Flattery will get you everywhere, Karev" Addison laughed "why don't you two take a seat and we can discuss our course of action?"
Pulling the seat out for April the woman took the chair offered as Addison went to sit behind her desk. Just as Alex was about to take his own seat he looked out and caught sight of Lewis standing out in the lobby and looking in at the 3. Alex knew immediately that the man was rattled.
"Can you two give me a minute?" Alex said to the women and after both nodded their heads he left Addison's office and made his way over to Lewis.
"Hey Babe...what are you doing here?" Alex asked and just as quick as lightning Lewis was pulling him down a hallway and into an on-call room and kissing him as if the man's life depended on it.
Something was definitely wrong. Alex wasn't that stupid, or that blind to not notice.
Lewis wanted to go home and the look in his eyes told Alex that Lewis needed this and although Alex wanted to know why, he loved Lewis too much not to be there for him.
"Can we just go...please?" Lewis practically begged.
"Okay, baby" Alex said as he leaned forward and gave Lewis a strong kiss "just let me settle things with April and Addison and I'll meet you in the lobby in 5, okay?"
"Okay" Lewis said and after they left the room Lewis made his way to the main lobby to wait while Alex walked back towards Addison's office.
"Sorry about that" Alex smiled, but he could tell it was off and Addison and April both knew him well enough to know Alex's mind was elsewhere.
"Everything good?" Addison asked.
"Yeah.. it's just-" Alex looked at April and he hated himself for having to leave.
"It's okay" April said "I can fill you in later."
"Thank you" he told her as he bent down and kissed her on the cheek "You're amazing" he added "I'll catch up with you later, Addison" he said and the woman nodded her head, but her face looked full of confusion and Alex became aware that he was nowhere near the kind of man she remembered from her own days working at Seattle Grace.
Once Alex got to the lobby he saw Lewis looking out of one of the windows in a daze. Grabbing his hand Lewis jumped "It's just me" Alex said as he brought it up to his mouth and gave it a kiss.
"You ready to go?" he asked Lewis.
"Beyond ready" and the two made their way to Alex's car.
They were halfway home when Alex decided to bite the bullet "So, are you going to tell me what that was about?"
"What do you mean?"
"I think I've gotten to know you pretty well, Lewis, and I know when something is wrong?" Alex told him "Is it Tyler?"
"No!" Lewis said instantly "Tyler is...no!"
"You know you can tell me if it is. You've been there for me with April and if this thing with Tyler is coming back I just want you to be honest with me. It would hurt like a bitch, but I just want you to be happy."
"I love you, Alex" Lewis told him "I want to spend my life with you and there is no thing with Tyler, he's just here to help Jackson, that's all."
Lewis sounded sincere "So what is it?"
"Everything" Lewis said "Jackson, Holt, I think it's finally starting to get to me"
Pulling up to their apartment Alex parked the car and getting out he walked over to Lewis and pulled him close "Let's see if we can't make this day better"
"I'd like that" Lewis smiled.
The second the two men entered their apartment Lewis was all over him. His hands under Alex's shirt and kisses peppering his neck.
"Somebody's excited" Alex laughed
"Want to fuck you" Lewis said "want to be so far inside you I forget the world exists"
The words were already making Alex hard "I think we can do that" he told Lewis as he pushed the man on the couch and straddled his hips. Once Alex started to grind against Lewis' pelvis he heard the gasp of pleasure and it only made Alex work that much harder.
"I wanna ride you like this" Alex said "feel you buck up into me"
"Alex" Lewis whispered as he leaned up and pulled him into a kiss. Taking off their shirts Lewis reached for Alex's pants and started to unbutton them with an urgency that Alex hadn't remembered since their first night together. Once undone Alex stood and kicked off his shoes and socks and followed that with removing his pants and boxers. As he was doing that Lewis was removing his own clothing. Once both were nude they took their original positions with Alex once again straddling Lewis's waist.
Alex bent down and kissed Lewis and when he felt Lewis insert his first finger into Alex's opening he hitched his breath.
"Been thinking about this all day" Lewis said "nothing makes me feel as good as you do, Alex" and inserting another finger Lewis wormed his tongue into Alex's mouth and Alex massaged it with his own. Being lost in the sensations that Lewis was inducing it wasn't until he felt the blunt head of Lewis's cock at his opening that reality suddenly came back.
"Lewis" he said "I have a condom in my pants pocket let me-"
"I want to feel you, Alex" Lewis said as he sat up and caressed the man's face with his hand "all of you"
Alex loved Lewis. Completely and fully, but he had never thought about what it would be like to do it without that layer of latex that he had always been used to.
Even with April and Izzie he had always used protection. He wasn't sure if he was ready to take that step yet.
"I love you Lewis...it's just..." Alex didn't want to break what the two had going.
"I get it" Lewis said "and I'm sorry. I shouldn't bring this up at a time like this"
"We'll get there, I promise" Alex told him.
"No rush" Lewis said as he bent over and pulled the condom out of Alex's back pocket and opening it up he started to roll it onto his cock "as long as I get to have you I have more than I could ever ask for"
The words swelled Alex's heart and lightly pushing Lewis back down Alex raised his ass and lowered it onto Lewis' erection. It took a few moments to work his way completely down the man's shaft.
"God, Alex" Lewis said as he placed his hands on Alex's hips "you feel so amazing"
"You too" Alex told him as he slowly started to bounce up and down and with each passing moment the pain subsided and was replaced by a building sense of pleasure.
"Just like that, baby" Lewis said "ride that dick" and the words spurred Alex on and soon the sound of flesh slapping against flesh echoed throughout the room as Alex moved his hips and threw his head back as the feeling of euphoria started to make his brain go fuzzy. Feeling Lewis grip his cock and start to pump it in earnest Alex could feel his body start to react. Covered in a sheen of sweat his orgasm was fast approaching as Lewis' thrusts became hard and fast and looking down he saw Lewis, eyes closed and biting his lip, it was the hottest thing Alex had ever seen.
Leaning down Alex gave him a quick kiss on the lips "Open your eyes" Alex told him "I want to look in your eyes when you come" and doing as Alex told him Lewis' blue eyes went straight to Alex's soul.
"A-Alex" Lewis pleaded as his orgasm took over his body and he came while Alex still rode him hard. Pumping furiously Alex soon followed Lewis in orgasmic bliss and once spent Alex collapsed onto Lewis and felt the man starting to rub his hand up and down Alex's back.
"That was fantastic" Alex said "I think I needed this, too"
"I love you so much, Alex" Lewis said "I hope you know that" and something in Lewis' voice sounded...sad.
"Of course I do" Alex told him "I love you, too. Now let's say we gotta take a shower and see if we can't get round two started and spent the night watching bad movies and ordering from that pizza place you love"
"Sounds perfect" Lewis smiled as he pulled himself out of Alex and took the condom off and stood up "care to join me for a hot shower?" he asked Alex as he offered him a hand.
"More than anything"
Michael Holt POV:
Michael had been sitting on the bench for a while after Lewis had been long gone. He couldn't believe that their friendship was really over. That this was it. Just like that. He meant what he had just said. That he missed him. That he missed their friendship, because he did. He never thought it could end like that.
Why couldn't Lewis just let him be there for him when he obviously needed a friend?
Michael had seen him leave the hospital and he had noticed immediately, how rattled Lewis looked, and even though they hadn't been talking, he had known he had to go after him.
Which he almost regretted now, because by doing that he had given Lewis the chance to hurt him again. He was sure that had been Lewis' intention, though. To hurt him. To make him feel the pain he had caused Jackson.
Jackson.
With every passing day his dislike for Lewis' younger brother grew and now it was Jackson's fault he had lost Lewis completely. Just because he had done what Lewis wanted.
Okay, he hadn't stopped when Lewis had asked him to, he had to admit that, but he wasn't one to back off in the middle of something, other than Lewis obviously.
He still didn't understand why all of a sudden Lewis felt so much compassion for his younger brother when all Jackson had done over the years was hurt him.
Over and over again Jackson had broken Lewis' heart and over and over again Michael had been there to pick up the pieces, and still there Lewis was: feeling sorry for the pain he had caused Jackson through him. Jackson didn't deserve any of this.
But at least Michael had managed to break up Mark and Jackson, which had been his main goal right from the start, even though he had to lie to him. Even though he had to lie straight to his face, but he obviously was a good liar, because Jackson had immediately believed him when he had told him they had slept with each other.
Disgusted, Michael grimaced.
It wasn't like Jackson wasn't good looking - he was. Michael wasn't blind and he could see that, but he just couldn't get himself into doing something like that at all. He didn't think he was ever able to sleep with a guy at all. He had been straight all of his life, and he hadn't even ever wanted to try things with a guy, even though Lewis had offered once to show to him how it felt, but not even with him - a guy he trusted with his life - Michael was able to go through with it. He probably was the straightest guy of whole Seattle.
Sighing, Michael got off the bench and entered the hospital. He made his way back to his office, checking out some patient files and after one last round in the neurological section of the hospital, he decided to call it a night. His shift was over anyways and there was nothing else to do.
He was in no hurry to get home either, though. No one was waiting for him there, so why would he even bother to go home at all?
He was just about to reach the entrance when he heard a voice behind him.
"Doctor Holt!"
Immediately, Michael turned around, putting on a smile when he looked at Meredith Grey.
"Doctor Grey. What can I do for you? Something wrong?"
Panting heavily, Meredith needed a minute or two to calm down enough to be able to form a proper sentence.
"No... I mean... I just thought we could probably grab a bite to eat or something like that," she smiled.
Confused, Michael tilted his head. Not that this wasn't what he wanted from the moment he got here, but that it was Meredith who invited him for dinner still surprised him.
"You really think that's such a good idea?"
"Why not? Why can't two colleagues have dinner together? We're friends, right?" Meredith asked, looking up at him.
"Right!" Michael gave back, thinking about it for a moment, before nodding. "Okay... why not?" He offered his arm to Meredith and she linked arms with him.
They found a nice Italian restaurant and Michael really enjoyed Meredith's presence. She was still one of the most beautiful women Michael had ever seen and he still wanted her like crazy. But he wouldn't make that easy for her. He liked women to fight for him. Fight for what they wanted.
When they had finished dinner, Michael - of course - paid for it and guided Meredith outside, looking to the sky.
"What a beautiful night," he sighed, and when he looked down again, Meredith was really close to him all of a sudden, had approached him without him even noticing it.
"Yeah..." she whispered. "Thanks for the dinner..." With her hands in her coat pockets she looked up at him as if she was waiting for him to kiss her, but instead, he took a step back, immediately noticing the disappointed look on her face.
"You're welcome," he smiled. "See you tomorrow... good night."
"Good night!" he heard Meredith say, and then he turned around and made his way down the street to get himself a cab. He could literally feel Meredith's looks on his back, but he didn't turn around again. Instead, he got in a cab and told the driver his home address.
Soon, he was sure, soon, Meredith wouldn't be able to resist him any longer. Soon, Meredith would finally go for it, and then he would be there to just take it. Take her. And then he would have won against Derek Shepherd. He would have taken his wife and his job would be Michael's soon, too.
That night, Michael slept better than he thought he would, and when he entered the hospital the next day, he felt really self-confident.
He made his way towards Jackson's office and knocked, not waiting for an answer. Instead, he just entered and looked down at Jackson, who was sitting at his desk, looking pretty exhausted. All the things Michael had done to him had definitely taken his toll on Jackson, but he wasn't finished with him. Not yet. If someone could help him with his problem, it was Jackson.
"What do you want, Holt?" Jackson asked, barely looking up at him, and writing something down in one of his patient's charts.
"You have to do something for me, Jackson," Holt said with a sugar-coated smile.
"And what would that be?" Jackson asked sarcastically and Michael didn't like the tone in his voice. It immediately caused some kind of anger to bubble up within Michael's stomach.
"You need to talk to Lewis. He's still avoiding me and not talking to me for all the bullshit I put you through, and I want my best friend back." Michael gave back.
Jackson let out a laugh. "Are you fucking crazy?"
"No!" Michael hissed through gritted teeth. "You're gonna help me with this, or..."
"Or what?" Jackson interrupted him, getting off his chair and rounding the table. "What could you probably do to me someone else hasn't already done to me?" Jackson looked him directly in the eye. "Are you going to destroy my relationship with Mark? Oh, wait, you've already done that when you got me drunk and slept with me... you want to destroy my friendships? Well... you should control your checklist, because you managed to do that as well... there is not much you can still take from me. My job is already on jeopardy anyways, so if you have nothing better to do, feel free... go to Hunt and tell him whatever shit you want, so it's over and I lose my job. At least I won't have to see your face anymore then."
Michael stared at him in shock. He hadn't expected Jackson to throw all those things at him, and it pissed him off big time.
"You played your part in it. I couldn't have slept with you if you hadn't literally thrown yourself at me."
"You know what? I don't care anymore. Just leave my office, okay? I'm not gonna help you with Lewis, because guess what? This is on you and only you. You should have listened to my brother, because then you wouldn't be in this position right now." Jackson literally shoved him to the door and out of his office, and before Michael had the chance to do or say anything else, Jackson had already slammed the door into his face, leaving Michael all pissed off and frustrated.
"Asshole!" he cursed, turning around and about to round the next corner, when he ran into someone.
Instinctively, he grabbed the person in front of him, keeping her from falling to the ground by it, and when he looked down he looked into the most stunning blue eyes he had ever seen.
"I'm... I'm sorry..." he stammered, just looking at the redhead in his arms.
The woman steadied herself, smiling at him. "No, I'm sorry. I didn't pay attention," she apologized.
For a moment, they just stood there, staring into each other's eyes, before the woman - obviously another doctor, judging by the lab coat she was wearing - started speaking again.
"You can let go again... I think I'm fine now... but thanks for keeping me from a very embarrassing fall to my backside."
"Right... sorry!" Michael replied, taking his hands off the woman's hips. "I'm Doctor Holt, by the way. Michael Holt. And I've never seen you here before, are you new?"
The Redhead let out a chuckle, and the sound was like music in Michael's ears. He was still pissed off at Jackson, but his mood was getting better with the second.
"Something like that," she replied. "I'm visiting old friends. Helping out with a case. It's most likely only temporary."
"Oh... what a shame," Michael gave back, smiling at her. "I hope I'll run into you again, then, Doctor...?"
"Oh, right! Sorry, I haven't even introduced myself. I'm Doctor Montgomery."
"Addison Montgomery? Do you happen to be related to an Archer Montgomery?" Michael asked, because he knew immediately, he had heard the name before.
"He's my brother," Doctor Montgomery replied. "You know him?"
"Kind of," Michael said, looking at her. "I can tell you over a coffee, if you want?"
"Some other time, okay?" Addison gave back. "I need to see Doctor Hunt, but I'm sure we'll see each other more often now. I think it might take a while to work on this case."
"I sure hope so," Michael replied, his eyes so glued to Addison, that he didn't even notice someone was watching them. He was sure this day was going to become a very interesting one, and he definitely hoped to see Doctor Montgomery again. Rather sooner than later.
Addison Montgomery POV:
Addison had no idea how much she missed Seattle until she had returned to the city. LA's sun and warmth was quite pleasant but there was something to be said for Seattle's rain drenched dewy mornings.
After her consultation with April she was really looking forward to helping the young woman out. She had to admit that Alex ending up with a woman as upbeat and perky as April came as quite a surprise. Maybe it was because of her own history with Alex, but she always imagined he'd up with a woman who was far darker than the bright light that Dr. Kepner had given off.
Somehow, Addison liked that Alex had grown up enough to find a woman who could bring out the joyful side that Addison had seen only in the briefest of moments.
If she was going to be here for the next few months she would need to talk to Hunt about setting up a proper office. The temporary one she had now was okay, but far from optimal for the kind of treatment April would require.
Making it to Hunt's office Addison knocked and waited until the man told her to enter before opening the door and walking in.
"Dr. Montgomery" Owen smiled "how are you?"
"Come on, Owen" she laughed " I think we've known one another long enough to drop the formalities. You can just leave it at Addison"
"Right, sorry" Owen laughed "this job kind of drills the formalities into your brain. What can I do for you?"
"I was wondering if you could grant me permission to spruce up the office you've lent me. The cold steel and grey is a good look, but it doesn't really represent me, ya know?"
"Oh, of course" Owen smiled "Until you decide otherwise that office is completely yours and whatever you wish to do with it is fine by me"
"Thank you, Owen" Addison said "something told me you would be good at this"
The blush came quickly to Owen's cheek "I try the best I can"
Addison felt like coming here was definitely the right move. She could see the possibility of raising Henry here and she didn't completely hate the idea.
Hitting the button for the elevator she waited a few moments until it reached her and once the doors open she looked up to see that only person was inside. The guy wore dark blue scrubs which told Addison that he was an attending, although a young looking one at that. With golden skin and short dark curls the guy seemed pretty attractive, but the moment he looked up at Addison and gave a small smile he went from pretty attractive to ridiculously gorgeous.
"Hello" he said and he took note of the women's lab coat "new recruit, huh?"
"Yes and no" Addison told him warmly "I used to work here a lifetime ago"
"Welcome back" the man told her and held out his hand to shake "Name's Jackson Avery" and taking his hand Addison gave him a strong grip "Addison Montgomery" and on an instant the man's eyes seemed surprised and nervous.
The tick was almost unnoticeable, but Addison had caught it and it reminded her of something, or someone, from her not too distant past.
Jackson had scratched his neck and the second the elevator doors reopened Jackson gave her a quick goodbye and made his way down the hall.
Suddenly Amelia had come to mind and Addison had a wanted need to call her and make sure she was okay.
When she reached her office a smile came across her face as she saw Mark standing there waiting for her.
"I almost had you paged" Mark said with a laugh "you know how I hate to wait"
"Oh, believe me I know" she told him giving him a playful slap on the shoulder "come in and let me show you the office. I'm going to need some decorating advice"
"Not my forte" Mark said "but I'll do what I can"
"Are you kidding?" Addison asked "I've seen your apartment and it's better than mine is"
"True" Mark conceded "I am multi-gifted"
"And so humble too" Addison laughed which made Mark do the same.
"How about I take the tour later? I was wondering if you wanted to grab some lunch and I can catch up on how Seattle is treating you?" Mark said.
"I am never one to turn down a free lunch" Addison said "especially at that burger joint down the street that I like"
"Hey, I never said I was paying" Mark joked.
"It was implied, now let's go because I'm starving"
"Yes Ma'am" Mark said and looped his arm inside of Addison's and the two made their way back to the elevators.
One of the things Addison missed most about the city was the incredible cheeseburgers that Berman's Burgers made. Something so simple as beef and cheese was crafted into one of the best things Addison had ever tasted.
"So" Mark said after taking a bite of his burger "anything interesting so far?"
"Well, I've met with April and Alex and we started discussions about the best course of treatment and between me and you I think the two are almost borderline too adorable. It's not the kind of girl I would expect for Karev, but I have to say I kinda like it"
Mark gave a small grimace and looked down at his plate and Addison knew immediately that the man was hiding something "What is it?" she asked.
"What? Nothing"
"Maaark" she warned.
"It's not really my place to say" Mark told her.
"When has that ever stopped Mark Sloan before? And you know me, I'm going to get it out of you one way or another"
Mark looked at her and she could see he was debating with himself "The hell with it" he said "it's not like they hide their relationship"
"That's my guy" Addison smiled "now spill"
"Alex isn't with April" Mark said "he's been dating my physical therapist Lewis Avery for about 5 months now"
"That almost sounds like a guy's name" she laughed.
Another awkward look from Mark "That's because it is" and at the statement you could have knocked Addison over with a feather.
"You seem...perturbed" Mark said and Addison could almost swear she heard a note of fear in his face.
"No" she laughed "you know me, Mark. Love is love and anywhere you find it is good in my opinion, it's just.. unexpected I mean you know me and Alex had a thing for awhile there, but it's just the way he and April were with one another. They seemed so close and it's definitely still something there"
"It's very complicated from what I hear" Mark said "but both seem to have reached a good spot"
"I didn't know there were two Averys working at Seattle Grace" Addison said "he's not related to a Jackson Avery is he?"
Suddenly Mark's eyes seemed to bulge "You know Jackson?"
"We met in the elevator, right before I ran into you actually" Addison said "the guy is freaking beautiful"
"So I hear" Mark responded and looked back down at his plate "but yeah they're brothers"
Addison looked at her friend and she knew something was amiss "Am I missing something?"
Looking up Mark shook his head and smiled "No, it's just been a long morning"
He was lying and Addison knew it, but she also knew pushing Mark on a subject was always a bad idea.
"So, did I tell you that I got asked out for coffee?" Addison said.
"Already" Mark laughed "you don't waste time"
"Can I help it if I'm too alluring?" she joked "but it probably won't lead anywhere, still, he was pretty cute"
"Maybe you should give me the guy's name so we can have a discussion on how to be a proper gentleman over coffee" Mark said and it got a chuckle from Addison.
"Discussion, more like interrogation" Addison said "so for now I'll keep him to myself"
"Fine" Mark said "it's not like I can't do my own research"
"Try it and pay the price, Sloan" Addison said as she slapped his arm playfully "what about your girl, still complicated?"
The smile was wiped from Mark's face "Not so much anymore. Seems it's not as temporary as I thought" he told her "They've moved on"
"I'm sorry, Mark" Addison told him as she grabbed his hand and gave it a squeeze.
Shrugging his shoulders Mark tried to pretend as if it wasn't painful, but Addison knew it was. It was awful enough that he lost Lexie, now to possibly loose this girl that had been amazing enough to even get Mark to consider another relationship made her heart break for the man.
"Hey, you're back now so it's not all bad" Mark said.
"Yeah, it ain't all bad" she repeated. She just wished that Mark could believe it himself.
Addison wasn't one to butt into other people's relationships, but she loved Mark and if this girl made him happy it couldn't hurt if Addison could just talk to her and help her see the bad decision she was making giving up Mark so easily.
She had somehow become a sucker for love and the look in Mark's eyes told her that when it came to this girl there was nothing but love there.
Arizona Robbins POV:
Arizona couldn't concentrate on her work at all. The fight with Mark yesterday still totally got to her and even Callie of course had noticed that something was wrong with her, but after asking what it was, Arizona lied straight to her face. If she would have told her wife about her fight with Mark, she would have also had to tell her why, and she couldn't do that. She couldn't go behind Alex' and Lewis' and Eli's backs like that. There were already too many people involved.
Arizona hated it to keep secrets from Callie, and she hated it even more to keep this special secret from her, but mostly she hated that she had to lie to Mark because of it.
Mark loved Jackson from the bottom of his heart and he should know the state Jackson was in. If it was her and if it was Callie who would be using, Arizona was sure she would want to know, but Lewis was probably right. It could throw Mark back a whole lot. He would be cleared for surgery in a couple of days. She had to wait at least that long, even though it wasn't easy.
"You okay?" a male voice asked from behind Arizona that put her immediately out of her daze.
"Yeah... I think so..." Arizona gave back, turning to Alex Karev.
"What about you?"
"I'm okay..." Alex replied, but the way he said it, made it more than clear for Arizona that he hadn't forgiven her yet, either, after the fight they had in Lewis' office. She hadn't seen Alex since then and felt like he was avoiding her, but he was coming to her now, so that was a sign, right?
"Alex... are... are we okay?" she asked concerned, looking up at him.
"Why wouldn't we?" Alex tilted his head, looking directly into her eyes.
"Yesterday... in Lewis' office... you have to believe me, that we're all on the same page here..." Arizona commented.
"Are we?" Alex bit back. "Because I remember you all thinking about reporting Jackson to Hunt and that is not the right way to help him."
"Alex, please," Arizona begged, grabbing Alex' arm. "If we're now also fighting, it won't help Jackson either. We all love him and want the best for him. You have to believe me, I'm just really worried about him."
Alex let out a sigh. "I know... and you're probably right, so yeah... we're okay."
A small smile appeared on Arizona's lips. "Really?"
Alex smiled back. "Really... besides... I don't think I'm the one you should try to make up with."
"What are you talking about?" Arizona asked, confused.
"Mark... Lewis told me about his fight with Mark and he mentioned that you might have had a fight with him before as well..." Alex replied, looking down at her. "Listen, I don't think it's good to keep him in the dark. He loves Jackson, and if it was me, I wouldn't want people I love and trust to have those secrets from me."
"What do you suggest? That we just tell him?" Arizona raised an eyebrow. "Believe me, I don't feel good lying to him either, but maybe Lewis is right. If we do this now, a week before he gets back to work, it could mean a relapse. Do you think Jackson would want this? And do you really think Jackson would want Mark to know about his... problem?" Her voice had become more and more quiet with every word she was saying.
Alex nodded. "Yeah... maybe you're right... still I don't feel really good about keeping him out of this."
"Neither do I... but for now it's for the best..." Arizona said, grabbing one of the patient's sheets on the counter and reaching it to Alex. "Ready for our first patient for the day?"
"Our?" Alex smiled. "That means Team Awesome is back on track, right?"
"Exactly!" Arizona chuckled, grabbing his arm and leading him towards one of the patient's rooms. She was relieved that at least Alex and her were on a good note again. It wouldn't be that easy with Mark, that she knew.
Arizona was just on her way out to get some lunch nearby when she saw Mark and Addison Montgomery entering the hospital. When Mark saw her, he immediately stopped in his tracks, not even bothering to look at her.
"Listen, Addison, I have to be somewhere. Is it okay if I leave you alone here?"
Addison let out a laugh. "I think I can manage the rest of the way, yes. See you later?"
"Yeah!" Mark replied. "See you later."
Mark turned around, about to leave the hospital, and that was when Arizona knew she had to do something. She had to hold him back. She passed Addison by with a quick greeting and then went after Mark, grabbing his arm, before he could get away any further.
"Mark! Please stop!" she breathed out, and when Mark turned around, there was this really cold look in his eyes that sent uncomfortable shivers down Arizona's spine.
"What do you want?" he asked distantly,
"Please... can we just... talk?" Arizona asked back, looking up at him.
"Okay... let's talk," he replied, burying his hands in the pockets of his black leather jacket. "You're ready to tell me what's going on with Jackson?"
Arizona twitched. Mark had never been someone to hold his anger back, but coming to the point directly, startled Arizona quite a bit.
"Mark, please... this is not on me to tell you..."
"No? I thought we're friends and can talk about everything, and if there's something wrong with Jackson, I need to know... he's my... he was my boyfriend and I still care for him..." Mark said bitterly. Arizona could tell that he was still really pissed off with everyone for keeping a secret about Jackson he didn't know.
"I know... but we're just worried about you," Arizona tried to convince him, but without much luck.
"You know what, Arizona? Save your breath for someone who's actually interested in hearing what you have to say. I don't want to hear your lame excuses if you don't mean them." Mark shook his head, a disappointed look on his face.
"But I mean it. I love you and I hate for us to fight. I can't stand it not being able to talk to you... Please, Mark. Don't hate me." Arizona pleaded, hoping it would have any effect on Mark.
"I don't hate you... I just hate the fact that you all think I'm too fragile to take the truth. Newsflash: I'm not... I survived a plane crash, I survived not only one broken heart, I will survive if Jackson has a new boyfriend..." Mark blurted out.
Startled, Arizona took a step back. "What?"
Mark rolled his eyes, annoyed. "Don't think I'm stupid, Arizona. I've seen him with this Ty guy... and it all makes sense now... you all in Lewis' office... Lewis obviously knows the guy, and he told me himself he's an old friend of Jackson... and he obviously doesn't only want to work here but get back into Jackson's pants..." he explained. "Yes, it hurts, but I can take it... because I'm stronger than any of you give me credit for. But you wanna know what disappoints me most? That neither of you believes in me. That all of you think I'm weak and will get a relapse just because my boyfriend has a new lover. Guess what, I won't... I'll be back at work next week, no matter what, and if Jackson is happy with this Ty guy, I'm gonna support him no matter what."
Mark turned around, taking a few steps away from Arizona, who was still way too stunned to react in any way.
"See you tonight, when you bring Sofia over... I really have to go now..."
And with this he was gone, and Arizona felt like someone had hit her on the head. Hard. Her mind started spinning around and she stumbled a few steps until she was back inside the hospital, where she found a bench to sit down.
Shit!
Mark had completely misinterpreted anything and everything and Arizona didn't even have the chance to make anything right again. Maybe she should have just told him that he was right, and then they would have been good again. Mark would have forgiven her for now.
But it would have made everything even worse once he found out the real truth, right?
Arizona's hands were shaking and she was sure she had to look pretty pale right now. She needed to talk to someone, because she just didn't know what to do anymore. She was on her wit's end, feeling a deep desperation rise within her. She needed to make things right with Mark. Not only for her own sake, but mostly for Callie's and Sofia's. It had been difficult enough in the beginning when Mark and her didn't get along, and she didn't want to put Callie through something like that ever again. And she really loved Mark and cared for him. She just had to make up with him, she just didn't know how without being able to tell him the whole truth.
Eli Lloyd POV:
Eli had spent most of his day distracted. So distracted that he had almost missed Arizona as he made his way back to the main lobby to recheck a patient's admittance form.
He had been heading on his way when he saw her sitting on one of the steps located at the far end of the hall, her head in her hands.
"Arizona?"
Looking up the woman appeared both shocked and slightly embarrassed "Oh, hey Eli" she tried to smile "I didn't see you there"
"I gathered" Eli told her "everything okay?"
Arizona was quiet for a moment "It's Mark" she said "we just had an argument. He's pissed off that it seems like everyone is lying to him."
"Everyone is lying to him." Eli responded "But it's for the greater good"
"Is it?" Arizona asked "We're all trying so hard to do what we think is best for Jackson, but the man is only getting worse every day and Mark knows something is wrong and the people he trusts; us, we're keeping it from him and he knows it. I'm lying to my wife and trying so hard to convince myself that it's worth it, because when all is said and done we can have Jackson back again, but I'm starting to think I'm just fooling myself"
With an empathetic sigh Eli took a seat beside Arizona "Nobody can ask you to put yourself through this, Arizona. It's not fair to you"
"I can't just ignore what's happening with Jackson" Arizona said "he's had such an awful 6 months and I'm just scared that he won't be able to pull himself out of it"
"Do you think Mark could help?" Eli asked "maybe he'll be able to take hearing about Jackson without relapsing"
"He thinks Jackson is sleeping with that Tyler guy" Arizona said bluntly "and I didn't correct him" she wiped another stray tear away "he was angry, but it looked like he could handle it and I started thinking that maybe it was better to let him believe that and avoid him feeling like he had failed Jackson in such a horrible way"
Grabbing her hand Eli gave it a light squeeze "You did the right thing" he told her "I know it doesn't seem like it, but I truly believe that once Jackson is better Mark is going to understand"
Turning her head she gave a smile to Eli "I hope so" and squeezing his hand back she stood up and pulled Eli up with her "I want to go talk to Tyler. See how far he's gotten. You think you can come with me?"
"Of course I can" Eli said "I just have to make a quick stop first and I'll meet you at Lewis's office in 20 minutes"
"Sounds good" Arizona responded "and thanks, Eli. It's nice to have someone to talk about this with"
"That's what friends do, right?"
"Right" Arizona said warmly and turning around she made her way back towards the main lobby.
Eli hadn't spoken to Jackson much in the past few weeks. Not that Jackson had spoken to many people at all, but Eli feared that one look in his eyes and Jackson would know that Eli was aware of his drug problem.
He didn't want the man to shut him out as he had done Alex and Arizona so, cowardly as it may have been, Eli had simply avoided him, or more accurately, let Jackson avoid him.
Now, there was no choice. Time was getting slim and with Mark returning more sooner than later they had to face this problem head on.
Standing outside of Jackson's office Eli took a deep breath before knocking.
"Who is it?" Jackson asked from the other side of the door.
"It's Eli" and hearing the man curse he heard a lot scuffling and it didn't take a genius to know Jackson had been doing something he didn't want anyone to know about.
"One minute" Jackson said followed by more movements and then Jackson swung the door open. Eyes dilated and face sweaty and the sight broke Eli's heart.
"What do you need?" Jackson asked, voice shaky.
"I need to talk to you, can I come in for a minute...please?"
"I'm really busy right now Eli and-"
"Please"
Relenting Jackson stepped to the side and let the nurse enter his office and the first thing Eli took notice of was the traces of white powder that Jackson wasn't able to wipe clean.
It was so much worse than Eli had thought.
"What is it?" Jackson asked as he scratched the back of his neck.
There was no room to tiptoe around the subject "You have to stop this, Jackson"
The man looked silently at Eli and then narrowed his eyes "Stop what?"
"You know what I'm talking about" Eli said "it takes one look at you to know what that powder on your desk means" and with wide, scared eyes Jackson rushed over to his desk and wiped it clean.
"Mark will be back in less than a week" Eli said "do you think he won't figure it out the instant he catches you like this" he added while waving his hand towards Jackson' desk.
"I guess that's another one" Jackson responded as his hands twitched "I should've known with seeing how close you and Dr. Robbins have become… She and Alex tell you this? Said that I had some problem because I don't want to be Alex's friend anymore?"
"Of course not" Eli said "look at yourself, Jackson. Do you not see how bad off you are right now?"
"What I see, Eli" Jackson told him "is this trend to constantly tell me what a fuck up I am. I hear it from Lewis. I hear it from Alex and Holt, then Dr. Robbins and now you"
"We aren't saying that Jackson we just care abou-"
"You just care about me and want what's best. You're worried and think I've changed" Jackson said "you all sound like the same broken record and I'm beyond tired of having to defend myself to you people so I'm not doing it anymore"
Eli noticed that with each word Jackson was becoming more erratic "Do you really think I don't mean it?" Eli asked "I remembered the way you were when you first came to this hospital and how upbeat and happy you were and to think that you're not that person anymore is...I miss that, Jackson"
The words had obviously had an effect and he expected Jackson to yell and scream. To shun him like he did with Arizona or punch him like he did with Alex, but surprisingly Jackson just looked hurt.
Before Eli could stop him Jackson had rushed past him and stormed out of his office. Leaving Eli standing there alone.
How could Eli even begin to fix something that was so broken?
When he finally reached Lewis' office he saw that the door was closed, but the closer he got the louder he heard the voices inside.
He didn't bother to knock and walking in he could see Tyler, Arizona, Alex, and Lewis having a very tense conversation.
Turning around they looked at Eli and after acknowledging him they all turned back.
"I just want to know if you made any progress" Alex asked Tyler.
"It's not that simple" Tyler told him "he's not just going to tell me what he's doing and if I try to confront him with it all he's going to is shut down, or get angry"
"We can't let him do surgery" Arizona said "I love Jackson, but we can't put patients, or this hospital, at risk"
"Don't you think I know that?!" Tyler responded angrily "I'm trying, but this man's life has been shit for the past half year and me piling on to it isn't going to accomplish anything"
"We're not saying that, Tyler" Lewis spoke to him softly "we're all just worried and we know that if there's any hope it's in you"
Eli watched as Tyler turned and walked across the room "We don't have a choice anymore" Eli said "I just came from Jackson's office and he... he.. he was using cocaine"
The room fell into an unbearable silence "We have all tried our hardest, but this is it and it's not even about the hospital. It's about keeping him alive"
"I know Jackson seems hopeless, but we've been here before" Tyler told the room "I just need to make him understand"
"You have two days" Arizona said "then we have to go to Hunt and hopefully he can force him into some kind of treatment"
"No" Alex said "Jackson could lose his job"
"I'll talk to Owen and try and make him understand" Arizona told him "but what happens if he tries to go perform a surgery?" she asked "what happens to him then?"
Tyler ran a hand through his short blond hair and Eli felt bad for putting so much onto him.
"I-I just need some air" Tyler said and walked out of the room.
"I hate this" Arizona said "I hate it" and the anger in her voice was so uncommon that it surprised the 3 men.
"I'll go talk to Tyler" Lewis said and before he left the room he grabbed Alex's hand tightly and the two exchanged a smile before Lewis left.
"We don't want to do this Alex" Eli said "I know what telling Hunt could mean, but Jackson is killing himself with each passing day"
Alex looked down and Eli could tell he hated that Eli was right.
"We've taken so much from him" Alex told him "this job is all he has left"
"He has us" Arizona said "and maybe Tyler can still help and reach him and if not I think it's time we do an intervention and let him know that we all love him too much to let him slip through our fingers"
"Where we all write him notes telling him how much his actions are hurting us?" Alex asked sarcastically "I'm sure he'll take to that very well"
"No" Eli told him "where we make him see that he has a family that will do anything to make him better"
"Exactly" Arizona said as she looked back and gave Eli and smile "we're his family and we refuse to let him destroy himself"