To Save the World, Part 2: Act IV
Stardate 2264.115
Jim wasn't a fan of funerals.
Not that anyone ever was, but Jim's life could be codified and marked by the funerals he had attended.
Maybe it was that the first pictures his mother had of him were not with both of his smiling parents, but rather with various officers in their dress uniforms at the memorial service for the lost crew of the Kelvin. Fellow Starfleet peers had told his mother that Jim had been the most relaxed baby they'd ever seen at such an affair.
Death only followed him from there.
As a completely rudderless do-nothing in a town of kids going nowhere, Jim lost a number of friends before he even graduated from school. Then, his tenure in the Academy was bookended with the destruction of a good portion of the fleet and Vulcan by the Narada. At the time, he had thought nothing could be worse than the injured, the dead and the mourning.
And then he had to give a memorial speech for Chris Pike and countless other victims of Khan's mania. Jim had spent so much of his life hating the men who tried to tell him what to do, how to think, what he was capable of… Chris had been the first one to really punch through all that noise and reach him. Losing him had definitely changed Jim.
He was definitely not a fan.
So, when Diana asked him to transport Vanessa's body back to Themyscira on the Enterprise so that she could give her a proper Amazonian funeral, he had reservations. Not about the request itself, but what he would do when they arrived back in the system.
It had taken three days to travel back from Earth to the Eos System after the initial investigations with Starfleet had been completed. In that time, Bones had run considerable scans on Diana, himself, and then Vanessa's entombed body. From the best the doctor could tell, he and Diana now shared the same balance of chroniton energy, and the same cellular scans showed similar regeneration properties in Jim's cells. Athena hadn't been speaking in metaphor.
During the scans, he had found a moment to explain to Diana what had happened during his brief death. She seemed… perturbed by his description of what Athena had told him. He wanted to ask her why she seemed so upset but it wasn't a can of worms he felt like opening at the moment. For all he knew, she might have just been upset about the funeral.
That thought made the immediate joy of realizing that he would be with Diana for… longer than he could really comprehend at this point fade, and another one sink in.
There would still be more funerals in his future. And not just as a Starfleet captain.
Perhaps it was the weight of that, a desire to feel connected and grounded by Diana in the wake of that knowledge, that made him ultimately decide that when they reached the planet, he would go with her. She didn't say anything one way or the other, and she had never asked. But, he had offered. After all, Vanessa's death was a burden they would both share.
After that particular decision had been made, Jim turned his full attention as the captain towards his Engineering staff. Scotty and Jaylah, using their combined knowledge, combed through all of the sensor data from the initial mission. By the time they were done giving Jim the full briefing in Stellar Cartography with the transporter logs, atmospheric breakdown, effect of the Galileo's impulse engines and everything else, his head was spinning. Typically, he would have asked for the abbreviated version, but, he could tell that by letting Scotty and Jaylah talk through the whole thing, they could feel certain their method was sound. They couldn't risk breaking the atmospheric barrier again.
It turned out that without knowing it, Jim's actions on the Galileo had been the key. In beaming Chekov and Sulu back from his shuttle while in the middle of the atmospheric barrier, Scotty could find a way to beam signals through without interrupting the barrier's delicate balance.
Spock had agreed as Jim announced he would be beaming down to the surface with Diana and Vanessa. Admiral Kent, who had in fact agreed to come aboard, would remain on the ship. Spock's reaction was met with a mixture of relief and slight concern on his part, but he knew there was nothing to fear on the planet. The Amazons had been nothing but gracious to him and they loved their queen. And in reality, he was there for her. Not as a captain, but as her partner in everything.
Upon their transport down, Diana must have appeared as any queen returned from conquest. She wore her black cloak and her armor, nothing that they had associated with the queen's garb, he was sure. But, they still rushed to her.
Diana didn't give anyone much opportunity to ask about what had transpired since she left. Kal-El had been clearly relieved to see her, but the moment he recognized Jim and noticed a body on a repulsor lift, he had nothing but questions. They were questions she was not in the mood to answer.
Not even Menalippe was able to drag anything out of her, as grateful as Diana clearly was to see her old friend. Instead, the Amazon queen simply stated that she had need for the sacred shrine of Persephone to cleanse a sister fallen in combat and to prepare for a funeral. Offerings would need to be prepared.
With that solemn note hanging over their heads, no one spoke to anyone after that. Jim shifted the lift to be between himself and Diana so they could both walk Vanessa to the shrine. The sun had risen, casting an orange hue over the capital as they walked. As they did so, Jim saw faces that he knew probably recognized him better than he could place them. He was the newcomer who had taken their queen. And now, they had returned with a fallen Amazon.
Much like any number of structures on Themyscira, once the great wooden doors closed behind them, the bustle and activity, even the sunlight seemed to leave them.
James Kirk had not exactly spent a lot of time looking up funerary rites for other cultures, especially the ancient Greeks, and yet… he subconsciously seemed to know what would happen next.
When Diana lit the first candle in the shrine, then used it to light three torches over a ritual altar clearly for the preparation of bodies, he began to understand. It wasn't subconscious; it was Diana. She knew what had to be done. That sense of purpose, of ritual, was bleeding over to him in the same way that he had sensed her exhaustion days before and little moments since. It wasn't all the time, and it wasn't invasive. It just… was. As their new reality, he would learn to grow accustomed to it.
Truth be told, time passed without meaning once they entered the shrine.
They didn't speak, save for the occasional soft words of prayer Diana muttered in her ancient tongue as she began the process of ritual cleansing. He didn't know how much he could - or should - participate, so Jim remained at arms' length, watching her work in the dim firelight to clean the now pale silver that encased the woman. Over and over again, she took the same care, the same elegant motions. She would take the sponge in the sacred basin of glowing water that ran through the island's caves, wring it out, then work head to toe to wash her.
It wasn't until Jim found himself handing her a small vase of sacred oil - a lekythos - that he realized she had silently invited him to take part in some small way. From there, he worked as her assistant. As Diana continued the ritual, he retrieved items wordlessly, already knowing their true names in the Themysciran tongue, until Vanessa's body was prepared. A wreath of flowers had been set upon her head and the fare to pay Charon, the Ferryman, tucked into the silks they wrapped her in.
When it was done, Diana took a deep breath, bracing her hands on the altar. She had been working for hours, at least it felt that way, and the torches had only slowly begun to warm the shrine with its lack of airflow. When she exhaled, he could hear her shake. Silently, he stepped forward and reached out to rest his hand on her back. He could barely begin to understand what she was truly going through, even with their sense of connection.
Funerals were sterile, distanced affairs on Earth now. This was deeply personal.
Diana nodded, as if his own thoughts had reached her, reminding her that she had to be strong for the rest of the ritual. She turned to face him, then hugged him, burying her face in his neck for a long moment as she simply breathed. Jim held her tight. After all, what else could he do?
Vanessa was gone. She was honoring her sister the only way she could. But, it didn't mean that Diana would be in any less pain for her loss.
Once she had taken a moment to steady herself, Diana pulled away. The queen he had met months ago, stoic and ready to uphold the traditions of her mother, reappeared. She stepped back, then disappeared into a dark corner of the shrine before returning with a pair of poles. She handed one to him, then took hold of the other and made her way over to the altar stone where Vanessa's body lay.
It was only when she began to thread the pole through a loop of fabric that he realized Diana had performed her work on a litter that would be used to carry her. Jim followed in suit, then caught her eye. He was strong, but carrying a body was not an easy task.
Nevertheless, the two of them picked Vanessa up at once and began to march back out the shrine. Pausing for a moment at the door, Diana stepped on one of the stones on the floor. The doors unlatched, then swung open so that they could continue.
What Jim saw when he stepped out onto the dirt road took his breath away.
For as far as he could see, in a great path leading up to the cliffs… it seemed like every citizen of Themyscira lined up along the road. Refugees, former Kandorians, Amazons themselves, all stood at attention along either side of the path. They stood at attention, ignorant to the wind blowing around them.
The entire island had come to honor a woman many of them had never even met. And the ones who did know Vanessa… the Amazons were waiting at the end of the main road, weapons at the ready to salute. Spears, shields, swords, all were drawn and poised to honor their fallen sister.
Jim felt the weight of the litter adjust and turned to spot Kal-El at his side. His eyes were dark, mournful, somehow gentler than his son's and yet somehow older now. He took one of the poles from Jim as Menalippe also moved to assist Diana on her end.
From somewhere behind them, a drum began to beat. He understood the cadence. He knew a processional when he saw one, much less participated.
The foursome began their steady march down the road, heading towards the cliffs that were kissed by the sea and overlooked the great paradise that Kandorian technology had sent them to. No one spoke, but as the drums continued and they passed person after person dropping favors or throwing their first straight in the air in salute, Jim could feel his heart beginning to clench, throat threatening to close from the sheer weight of emotion around him.
Phillipus and Artemis waited for them at the end of the Amazons at attention. It wasn't until he noticed Kal-El handing over the litter that he understood that there were some duties that, even now, men could not have. He didn't blame them.
The Amazons had built their culture without men. They would bury their dead without them.
The litter continued forward and after a long moment, watching Kal for his cue, they followed after. Many of the people that Jim now knew to be descendants of misplaced refugees remained on the main road, never taking the trip up the hill. Yet, they were clearly versed in the culture they had assimilated into.
Jim could hear the cries to honor Vanessa Katalepis, Daughter of Euboea, Great Explorer, Great Scholar, over and over again from the crowd below as it caught on the wind carrying them up to the cliffs. Again, he swallowed down the grief that had begun to cling to him like the mist coming off of the sea down below.
Funerals just reminded people of the loss. Of the mistakes made, of the chances not taken. Yet, Diana was convinced.
As he reached the hill, the procession had come to a halt and the litter set down on what was clearly a recently prepared funeral pyre. He noted the amber glow beneath it. There were already coals, the fire was already started, only waiting for Vanessa.
When Diana started speaking, it honestly took him a moment to realize that his communicator had begun to translate from Koine. Belatedly, he found himself wishing he could hear her native tongue over the computer voice, so he reached into his pocket and turned the translation down to just a whisper.
After all, when a goddess spoke, he'd learned to listen.
"Hear me, Hera, O most powerful Queen of the Gods!" Diana began with a great shout, the words echoing in a way that suggested they would be carried off to the sky, to the gods themselves - wherever they were. Something told him that Athena, whatever, whoever she was… was listening. He wondered if she would be upset that Diana was still using the traditional queen of their people. After all, the Amazons didn't know. "Hear me, Athena, O Wise Patron! O Sovereign Patron! Hear me, Artemis, Great Huntress!" Diana raised her hands out to her sides, the black cloak billowing before her as if she could command the wind and seas herself. "Hear me, Persephone, Goddess of the Darkness! I am Diana, she who is Queen of the Amazons! Hear our most tragic suffering, our most pained grief for our fallen sister, for we have no words to describe her loss! Hear how our hearts bleed for her!"
Something started around him, something… truly extraordinary.
Jim had been present at ritual displays of grief. They tended to be more for the sake of ritual, more theatrical. But, around him…. Around him began a great wail. Amazons all around him began to wail, sobbing and keening. The sound began to swell, then carried back down to the capital below, ripped from the collective breast of the Amazon people. Their cries, raw and devastating, were returned on the wind, only serving to heighten the tide of emotion. They beat their chests with their fists, gripped a fistful of their hair and tugged, as if Diana's words had been true that their hearts bled and they were in pain.
But, of course they were. The Amazons all saw each other as sisters. And Vanessa was one of the youngest.
Jim found himself unable to swallow down that well of grief when he caught the silent tears falling from Kal's face. Blinking, Jim knew he couldn't bring himself to the kind of raw grief they felt, but…. He didn't bother to stop his own tears from falling.
"We pay the Ferryman for Vanessa Katalepis, O Gods! Prepare the way, and know that Cerberus himself will tremble!" Diana shouted into the winds. The ritual wasn't just rote memorization for her. She knew the words, she believed the words. "Hippolyta, welcome your subject! Antiope, welcome your pupil!" Diana's voice caught for a moment, but Jim couldn't see her expression to know precisely what she was thinking. She took a deep breath, then held her fist up to the sky. "Euboea, she who was first to die in Man's War to End All Wars -welcome your daughter!" The seas below seemed to rage in time with her with a sonorous crash against the cliffs. Salt and foam were cast over them all as if to baptize them. "Behold! An Amazon comes to Elysium this day!"
The wails turned to the most ferocious battle cry Jim had ever heard in his life. The sound that tore from the chests of each of those warriors sent a shiver down his spine as they began to beat their shields and weapons together, screaming with the kind of ferocity that he had once seen centuries ago on the beaches, as Antiope led her forces on horseback against a foe they had never learned to retreat from.
The battle cries continued as Diana and Menalippe simultaneously reached out and gently pulled the poles from the litter. Vanessa's body dropped into the already glowing, stoked fire and disappeared.
The Amazons continued their cry, hoping their fury would terrify even the gods from interfering with Vanessa's paradise.
Vanessa Katalepis was truly home. No Borg, no Starro, no Cale, no more pain. She was honored. She was loved.
And the Amazons would be sure the gods knew as much.
Diana truly hoped that the gods had heard the battle cries of her fellow Amazons, of the beautiful coalition of new and old Themyscirans that had rose their voices as one to honor Vanessa. She hoped that their cries echoed through the cosmos until they reached Apollo's ears at his hidden temple on Delphi and Persephone herself visited Vanessa in the shared Elysium of great heroes.
After all, in many ways, Vanessa had been more of a hero than Diana had been for a time. She had not been an exceptional soldier, great diplomat or peacemaker. She had simply been willing to explore, to take a journey with people that were different, to use science and wisdom to temper man's passions. And for a time… it had worked.
Diana wondered what Starfleet's historical logs would say about her now. Would she be condemned to be a footnote in their archives with a simple note that she had become a foreign agent? She laughed a little to herself. More likely, the records would be full of redactions that made it impossible to read what had happened to her after the Argentum Cygnus went missing.
Just as well.
Let the world remember Vanessa for who she had been, not what she had been forced into. That was how Diana had last seen her in Elysium, and it would remain so. She would forever be able to ride the crystal seas of those shores, much like the same sea Diana was now watching slowly roll out.
The Temple of Athena had been her mother's crowning achievement. Its columns rose towards the sky and the grounds went right to the cliffs. The goddess's statue overlooked the city as Diana now watched the sea. It had been a place of worship, of hope, for Diana for so many years, yet the goddess had never made herself known to her.
Diana frowned as she kept her eyes on the water ahead, but directed her words to the goddess in question. "I prayed to you for guidance and wisdom. For two hundred years, I kept your fires lit myself. I tended your sacred birds, I made offerings, and I prayed to you. Every day." Diana had sensed the arrival of the Goddess of Wisdom, but did not turn to face her until she could be sure that her anger was tempered. It was not truly anger that she felt against Athena, rather sorrow. "Now, the moment I have stepped back on Man's World, seen what they were brought to, and finally ended Circe's manipulations… now, you return."
Athena stood before her statue, yet somehow, she seemed greater and even more graceful than the marble twice her size. Her owl was perched on her shoulder, heather gray and sea blue robes billowing in the wind. She looked just the same as the last time Diana had seen her, back on Man's World in the 2040s. It only served to remind Diana that her anger and her sorrow were not misplaced.
"You could have stopped that war. I could have stopped that war, if only you had come to me. I would have found a way to leave, to stop them from slaughtering millions and destroying everything the League worked for." Diana's voice caught for a moment as she realized Athena looked her in the eye, seemingly unfazed. Had she grown so deaf to the plight of mortals? Even if she had…. "What did I do for you to abandon me? To wish to see it all burn? How is that the goddess that my people call Patron?"
Athena's eyes, grey as the stormy seas, finally softened at Diana's more plaintive tone. When she finally spoke, there was the hint of a sigh, as if it hadn't occurred to her that Diana wouldn't naturally know her reasoning. "Sister… I could not have stopped that war. It was not to abandon you, but rather for mankind's greater purpose. There is wisdom in failure." Diana's stomach twisted as she recognized that in her newfound divinity, that had the ring of truth… but it felt sour. Knowing the Truth would not always be a comfort. "That conflict would have always come to pass, even if you had been there. And we could have lost you forever."
Diana's frown deepened. So, it had been true. Athena had moved the gods from Olympus, abandoning humanity to their own folly. "You don't know that. I could have - "
"I am the Goddess of Wisdom, but I am also a goddess of War." Athena rose a hand quickly to silence her. An Amazon first and an Olympian second, Diana's protests died on the wind as she found herself obeying the goddess. Standing straighter, Athena's spear summoned itself from the ether into her hand. In her other hand… the very sword of Athena that Diana had assumed was lost in the fires of Starfleet Headquarters. Her robes blew aside to reveal the aegis, the sacred goatskin shield adorned with the snakes of a gorgon from ancient conflict. "My aegis has been scarred by swords, taken the blows of spears. So, yes, I do know when man's passions will end in conflict. And in this case, it was necessary. That is why I did not come to you, Diana. You would have wanted to stop it, or help them rebuild in the aftermath. But, you could not be the one to create their new world. Only they could."
"Then the Justice League meant nothing?" Diana spat, only to realize that she did not like the acidic edge of her own tongue. She took a deep breath, shaking her head in apology before she continued. "Forgive me, Athena, but… you abandoned them. For a new people. And that was not Zeus's machination, that was yours. Apollo stated as much. And that is all the more puzzling, because he was the one I would have expected it from. But, not you." Diana swallowed thickly as she thought of the scars Conner would carry with him in his heart for the rest of his lives. "The very goddess who asked me to become the Champion of the Gods… Never you. "
Athena's sword and spear disappeared as quickly as they arrived. Instead, the goddess approached her, reaching her hands out to Diana. When she didn't immediately move towards her, she sighed and instead motioned for her to join her at the small bench overlooking the water.
They had spent many years in such counsel. Athena had always said she preferred to speak to Diana as an equal, not a supplicant. It seemed that had not changed. And for the first time, Diana felt perhaps that was for the best. Maybe she would finally get answers.
"Diana…" Athena said softly, her name a sigh as they looked out at the tide pulling further out. "I wish I had the words to make all of this easier. But, I do not, for this was no easy choice. I can only tell you why I made the choices I did and hope that you will understand."
"Not just about humanity," Diana turned to face her, brow still furrowed with her troubles. "What you have done to Steve… to Jim…. that was not your decision to make. You had no right - "
"Have you become one of the Fates in my absence, Diana, that you so well know how the shears must cut?" Athena asked with more than a hint of amusement. In that moment, Diana found herself blushing with embarrassment. It had been a long time since she'd been shamed by her patron as well. "Steven Trevor was a good man, cut down before his time, in service to you. Neither of you knew your true heritage, but he knew that he could make the sacrifice you should not." Diana noted Athena's careful turn of phrase, one that Diana had thought herself. It wasn't that she couldn't have gotten on that plane… but, she could not be everywhere at once. "You do not like to receive gifts because you feel that you are not worthy. And that is admirable, but largely untrue."
Diana opened her mouth to protest, but Athena simply rested her hand on her arm to stop her.
"You know I speak Truth. You are the authority on such things now, so you must learn to be more honest, even in your humility." Athena's amusement faded as Diana's expression did not change. She was still waiting for an answer. "I made the choice I did because humanity did not need us. They were destined for a greater purpose. The Justice League was a noble beginning, but you cannot expect the weakest to raise themselves higher if the paragons they trust never make them. And they barely knew of our existence. They knew you, Diana, but the League was the new pantheon. When we left, their belief in us had already begun to wane. But, there would be no new moon to restore us. And Zeus would not listen."
Diana caught the dark edge to Athena's voice at the mention of her absentee father, even when he was alive. She recalled what Jim had told her of his dance with death. "You told Jim that you were now Queen of the Gods."
Athena nodded. "Zeus believed that humanity would believe in him once more, if given enough time. But, he did not want to interfere with their affairs. When Themyscira vanished, it greatly weakened him." It made sense. The Amazons still believed in him, even if they did not respect him as much as the goddesses. "I led the rest of the gods to new peoples, in the hope that we could extend our time. But, he could not adapt to the changes. I do not know if he lives, but I do know he abdicated to me. And I have since led the gods in our efforts across the stars to coach new races, nurture them to their potential."
Diana thought of Khitomer and the last god she had met. "So, you gave the Klingons Ares to deal with?"
Athena chuckled, shaking her head. "Ares has made his own bed. I do not control what my brother does, nor should you." It was the bitter chuckle of a woman who knew the same truth as Diana - one did not kill Ares… they outplayed him in the gambit for peace. "But, this was all done for a reason. I could see that humanity would outgrow gods. Eventually, those who were exceptional would need to be integrated into society, not held above them or demanding to rule." It was clear that they both knew who she meant. Diana hoped that wherever Khan had been sent to, he would never return. Cale's legacy would end after this. "Sometimes, Empires must fall for new Republics to rise. And as I told James, you do not need to rule above them, Diana. You do not need their worship, you will never know its pull as we have." Athena reached out and rested her hand on the other woman's arm. "You can continue to be one of them. That is what they need. They need a peer who will guide their hands and hearts. You and James can do that now."
Diana took a deep breath, trying to process what the goddess was trying to tell her. On the one hand, it was so… profoundly Olympian and god-like for Athena not to tell Diana her plan until its completion. It also meant that on some level, Athena had always hoped for Zeus's power. "What have you done to Jim… exactly? I know what he told me, but… I must hear it from you." She turned to look at her. "You made him Champion of the Gods."
"Yes, but in truth, he is champion of one god: You. Diana, the Risen Goddess of Truth." Athena smiled. "You will perform wonders, Diana. You will lead them to a new horizon, past even greater enemies than Circe or Cale. But…" Standing, the goddess strode from the seaside viewpoint to face the city below. Diana followed. "I knew that your destiny would be a lonely one. And loneliness… it changes us. You knew it yourself. Here, on Themyscira, among your people, you never let yourself love, to have an equal partner that knew you in a way even Kal-El could not." Athena pointed a singular finger down towards the ground. To Jim, who was talking with Menalippe, clearly explaining some tale of their exploits. Somehow, even her stern advisor and old friend was amused by the tale. "He has complimented you in every way that you need. And this time, I could ensure that he would lead a life more in a land of milk and honey than of rocks and bramble."
"He lost his father at birth," Diana said, voice heavy. "That is not a land of milk and honey."
"'Life kills life all the time. So, the goddess kills herself in the sacrifice of her own animal,'" The words were well-known to Diana. They were inscribed on the Sword of Athena. "Life must pay for life. Guinan told you the same."
Guinan's cryptic warning on the bridge of the Enterprise had followed Diana for months, but she had never let herself wonder what that meant. Now, she understood. "George Kirk. Christopher Pike. Vanessa." She glanced over at Athena. "Every time Jim was… altered by the gods, you took the life of another to forge him into a new man."
Athena held her hand up to correct her. "The Fates had already chosen that their threads would be cut. I did not ask them to spin those moments into James's life, nor could I. I am not omniscient, Diana, and neither are they. But, it was not in vain. Do not look at life in terms of those lost. Think of those who are yet to come, who will see what good you can bring."
Diana glanced down at Jim, still smiling and genuinely amusing her aunt. It had been so long since Menalippe had truly smiled, yet… she seemed as if a weight had been lifted somehow.
"You see it now, don't you?" Athena simply breathed, clearly watching him as well. "He is in need of no power, Diana. He needs only to be himself."
The thought made Diana scoff, albeit in genuine amusement. "Doctor McCoy and I would both agree that is more dangerous than giving him Zeus's thunderbolt."
Athena laughed softly. The sound, coupled with the new understanding of his fate, began to finally help Diana come to grips with the events of the past. It was true: mortals died. Sometimes, there was no way to save them. She had never met Chris Pike or George Kirk. Yet, their impact on Jim was more profound than she ever could have expected. She wondered if Guinan knew from her knowledge of those… possible timelines, decisions made differently, if Diana ever would have met Jim had those two not set him on the course of a young, adventurous and devil-may-care captain.
"Let yourself be happy, Diana. Enjoy the gift of the gods, enjoy the life you wanted to live with James Kirk. I cannot bring any of those lives back, but I can honor Vanessa's..." Athena's voice seemed to carry on the wind. Diana could sense what was occurring, and turned to look.
"How?" Diana's question died on her lips.
Athena was already gone. Of course.
Sighing, she turned her attention back to the courtyard down below, wondering what next mystery she would be presented with.
She wasn't sure if it was better that instead of a mystery, Menalippe had caught sight of her and was waving her down. There were still two more matters that had to be resolved before she could turn attention back to the galaxy at large.
Diana made her way down from the Temple with ease. As she did so, she pulled her communicator and asked that the bridge send down the remaining crewmember she had requested. Now that the Enterprise knew how to tap into the subspace relays on the planet, communication had come through quite clearly.
"My queen," Menalippe said with a smile, saluting her for a moment. Whatever story Jim had been telling was no longer of interest, but he seemed to take it in stride. Behind the other amazon, he simply smiled at her and motioned to the approaching Kryptonian on his right. "I had hoped that your counsel with Athena would have eased your mind."
Diana tilted her head from side to side, as if debating that very conclusion. "I'm not sure it eased my mind, but I have the answers I seek."
"That's good to hear," Kal chipped in as he reached them. "I'm just sorry you returned under such circumstances. Captain Kirk has been giving us the cliffnotes version of what you've gone through. Sounds like quite the adventure."
She nodded. "It has been." Biding her time, she motioned to a scroll in Kal's hand. "Is that what I think it is?"
Kal handed it over to her with a curt nod. "It is. Vanessa's cremation is complete, and we've taken the metal to Io for crafting. She's going to mold it into her pillar and imprint that on the front."
Raising an eyebrow, Diana unrolled the scroll so she could see the work of their master blacksmith. A swell of emotion struck faster than she was able to compensate for it, her eyes warming, but not with grief. Instead, it was in relief and gratitude for her sisters. "This is beautiful…" She breathed. "And will honor her well." Amazon customs dictated that the cremated remains of the fallen be placed into an amphora and buried. Then, a funeral pillar would be set upon it.
Jim was the one to finally speak to the design, the slight smile on his face indicating he understood its value as much as she did. "A swan… At least, it can be a symbol of her salvation, not her downfall."
She looked up at him, smiling a bit as he took the words right out of her mouth. She could see what Athena meant, although she suspected she always had known it. Jim Kirk was her equal now, and the two of them had countless opportunities to learn how this even more in depth connection would work. How many sentences would they finish for each other? How many jokes would they try to beat each other to?
Menalippe seemed to sense the moment, though, and couldn't help but interject with the question she had expected all along. "Now that the funeral rites have been attended to, will you be staying?"
"No, my friend." Diana reached out to rest her hand on her mentor's shoulder. She had been her best companion on Themyscira, but she had never wished for more than the protection of their people. She would understand best of them all. "I must go back. The galaxy… has grown much larger since we were once a people of Earth. And Themyscira will eventually play a part in all of that. I would rather be out there, representing our people while you and the Senate continue here." She glanced over to Kal. "With your help."
Kal frowned, crossing his arms over his chest. They had had the argument countless times before, but now, she would not take no for an answer.
Even if those were the first words out of his mouth.
"No, Diana. I told you, it's not the place for me anymore." Kal grumbled.
Behind Jim, she heard and saw the transporter shimmer. "I thought that would be your answer, and your wife wanted me to tell you for a fact that it was time to stop running." She glanced back up at him. "But, in case you needed a reminder…" She reached out and slowly took Kal's arm, guiding him to turn. "There is someone who would very much like to see you."
Conner Kent stood in his Admiral's uniform, but looked more like the young boy she'd watched grow into a hero in his own right. With one hand stuffed in a pocket, he waved with the other. The yellow sunlight he had exposed himself to in his armor had given him years back. Finally, the father and son looked as they should.
Kal's voice actually trembled when he breathed. "Conner?"
Conner smiled. "Hi, dad." Taking a few tentative steps closer, he held a hand out as if to shake. "I was hoping we could catch up."
With a burst of speed Diana hadn't seen in years, Kal-El was gone from her side. And he was holding his son's face in his hands, looking him over with the biggest "farmboy" grin she had seen in centuries.
Oh, thank you, Diana… Lois's voice struck her so hard that tears fell.
As the sound of Kal hugging his son filled her ears, babbling a million things he'd left unsaid for years, Diana wiped her eyes and allowed herself to smile.
You are very welcome, sister, She thought, knowing that somehow, in that paradise she had briefly touched, Lois was watching.
She caught Jim's eye for a moment. He was watching her with that same expression she'd noted over two lifetimes. It was that look that said, Well, if she's smiling, then everything will be fine.
And he was right. Everything would be fine.
Captain's Log, Stardate 2264.116
After what has proven to be an enlightening and emotional experience for Ambassador Prince, Admiral Kent and the people of Themyscira, the Enterprise has concluded her rendezvous with the planet. We put one of their people to rest and have gained a new passenger for transport back to the Yorktown.
It is not lost on me that when we first came to this planet months ago, I thought the trajectory of my career and our deep space mission seemed set. The rhythm I had so desperately hated had become a comfort. My only worries would have been what I planned to do after the mission was over. Would I be given command of the Enterprise again? Would some admiral or commodore start pushing that I move into the Vice Admiralty position I'd flirted with?
Now, if I am to believe the impossible, my career is going to be a lot longer than I thought. How much longer, I can't say, but learning there's no expiration date on one's life tends to get the mind moving.
I've never professed to be a man of faith. As a general rule, I have faith that my gambles will pay off, that my luck will hold out, that my crew will come through. My faith in Diana… that's been something else entirely.
I never thought I'd find something that would give me pause, make me wonder what happens beyond the chair. I had flirted with the idea, allowed my melancholy to dictate my actions, but with the help of a few well-placed words of wisdom, I've come through that. But, if I'm truly… immortal - it's hard to even say now - then I guess the real question is…. What does this mean? Who is Jim Kirk going to be fifteen years from now or fifty?
While I have a whole host of new quandaries to consider, I have nothing but time to do it. And I know one thing: there is no part of this equation that doesn't include Ambassador Prince.
Not exactly the most professional note to end a Captain's Log on, but nothing about the last few months has been impartial or stoic. Guess I'll just have to get used to it.
By the time Jim Kirk finally breezed back into his quarters, he was both pleasantly surprised and nervous to find Diana already there. Not that she made him nervous, but this conversation had been long overdue, and Jim had been hoping he could have started it off the way he planned.
Naturally, his crew had other priorities than their captain's love life for the moment, especially since as far as all of them were concerned, he had no reason to rush.
Given how she was seated on his couch, though, he had a feeling she had only recently arrived and was deep in thought.
"Sorry I'm late," He said as he crossed the distance between them and leaned over to kiss her on the head. The moment she turned to face him, that smile of hers he loved so much appeared. He practically floated to the couch instead of his normal flop. "Bones was determined to run at least one more scan before we left orbit. He's greatly put out by the very notion that Athena thought I was "wise" enough to warrant immortality." He shook his head, chuckling at the lecture he'd literally walked out of in order to make it back to his quarters. "If I took him more seriously, I'd think he was personally offended."
She chuckled and leaned back a bit so she could face him more. "Maybe he's just put out that now you have ample excuses to ignore his medical advice when he tells you not to go on away missions."
The two of them hadn't had many quiet moments like this since they'd left Earth for Themyscira. He found himself thinking of their drinks on the observation lounge. He was pretty sure he'd started to fall for her then, long before he knew what that would mean for him. Everything about her carried weight, carried purpose and grace.
Like usual, Jim felt like he didn't know how he'd gotten here.
"That is such a turn on, you know that?" He finally blurted, only to realize from the arch of her brow that he had given no explanation for his inner monologue. "Just… the way you talk about the impossible as it's already yesterday's news, or standard protocol. Nothing ever fazes you."
Diana smile grew warmer, clearly amused by him. "Believe me, I've been fazed before. If I had not been in the midst of…" She hesitated, as if the words still seemed foreign to her. "Attaining my godhood, I would have been beside myself that you were gone."
"So, I pale in comparison to cosmic power, is that it?" He teased.
Diana patted his cheek gently, as if to scold him. "Of course not. But, I could still sense that you were connected to me. It was something that I'd begun to feel over the months, but never to that extent. I simply knew you would return."
"So did Athena. The only one who didn't know was me, apparently." Jim said as he was reminded a little more forcefully of his conversation with the goddess. His stomach turned a little as he realized they were already heading into the territory he knew he needed to discuss with her, but didn't know how she'd take it.
"I mentioned my displeasure to Athena as well, that she was taking both of our lives into her hands and dictating them," She said, an edge of annoyance back in her voice. "But, as she pointed out, I do not accept gifts from the gods very often."
"To be fair, I apparently asked." He conceded. "I just didn't remember."
"Oh, good, so we agree it's your fault." Diana teased him before he could walk back his statement.
"Okay, now, see, that's not fair - " He began.
"No, no, it's your fault." She said, laughing as he tried to pull her closer. "You've admitted it now, so I have until eternity to tease you over…" Diana's laugh faded a bit as the elephant in the room came back up again. "That."
Silence fell between them. It would probably be a while before they could joke about what had happened without being constantly reminded of the price it took.
"Look, I want to ask you something, but…" Jim slowly pulled free and stood. "I think we need a bit of a pick-me-up before I get serious." Diana tilted her head and made a move to follow him. "No, stay put. I'll be right back."
When he returned, his nervousness that Diana had already scoped out what he'd planned disappeared from the look of sheer glee on her face. "Ice cream!"
Grinning, he set two bowls of clotted cream ice cream down in front of her on the coffee table. "I would love to take credit for getting this because I knew we were about to have a rough week, but I'd actually just been trying to get this requisitioned for a while. But, ice cream from the United Kingdom requires that we can pick up on Earth."
Diana's eyes widened as she took the bowl. "Are you saying this is…"
"Devon clotted cream ice cream." Jim said, a bit proud of himself. "Took me about a month to remember what flavor you had at that train station."
She looked from him to the bowl of ice cream, then back up to him as she went to get a spoonful. "You didn't have to - "
"Yes, I did." He simply replied. "That's one of those memories that I have been able to hold onto all this time." To think, he'd been trying to take her to get ice cream every single time they'd been on Yorktown station, even before he had known just how deep their connection had gone. If he was going to dump his concerns on her, the least he could do was make sure she had something to make her smile in spite of it.
Diana took a bite and moaned softly, leaning back in the seat. "It's just like I remember…" She breathed, lost for a moment in the nostalgia.
After he realized he'd been watching a little too long, he smiled. "Good, because if I had been wrong, this would have been a bit awkward..."
She went to take another bite, but hesitated. Like usual, she could see right through him. "Right now, the only thing I find awkward is that you're clearly dancing around something. Just ask me, whatever it is. Don't start holding back now."
He sighed, nodding as his stomach rolled a bit unpleasantly. "You're right. I just…." He found himself thinking back to why Athena had kept everything from him until he had literally died protecting Diana. "I know this whole… immortality thing is normal for you, but it's not for me. And I'm already starting to realize what Athena meant when she said that it came with a burden."
She set her ice cream aside, leaning forward towards him. "The funeral." She simply stated, cutting to the heart of the issue with ease.
Jim nodded as he reached up to massage the back of his neck, although out of nerves or habit he wasn't sure. "I've always expected I'd go before anyone else. Even my mom. The job isn't without risks - hell, we just proved that. But… at some point, I have to... " Jim trailed off as he thought of Bones, of Spock, of Uhura… they'd been with him for years, through the academy. He'd never considered what his life would have been like without them. "I have to say goodbye." He finished in a rush.
Diana reached out to rest her hand on his, but he pulled back a little, aware that he was a bit too keyed up to really accept comfort before he got his worries off his chest.
"And don't - please don't misunderstand, Diana," Jim said, pressing his hands together in front of him as he tried to make sense of what hardly an easy question. "I am not saying I regret this, or that I'd rather you shoulder this burden alone, but... " He reached up to brush an errant lock of hair out of his eyes as he looked up at her. "I am terrible at losing people. I thought you were gone for a hot second and I nearly lost my mind. If Scotty hadn't shown up when he did, I probably would have panicked. Because, that's what I do. I panic, or I lash out, or I make decisions to try to reorient everyone else in my life so they won't leave. But, that's not really an option anymore, is it?" He scoffed. As if controlling others' lives had ever really been an option. "I don't know how to do this part. I am…" This time, when Diana slipped her hand to his cheek, he didn't fight it. Being able to voice the concern, like so many other demons, seemed to help take away the power it held. And her touch was helping ground him by the moment. "I am so grateful that I can be with you forever, because we fit. But… I don't know how I'm supposed to handle saying goodbye to everyone and everything eventually."
Diana's other hand came up to cup his cheek, thumbs brushing against his cheekbones with delicate, fluttering touches. "Jim, having practice doesn't necessarily make it any easier for me, either. This is why I never would have asked this of the gods. It's one thing to ask for a physical reward that doesn't affect anyone, but this… this absolutely effects you."
Jim leaned into her touch, feeling even more like a tool for complaining at the slightly guilty tone in her voice. "I swear, I am not trying to be ungrateful and I am not about to trade eternity with you just so I can sleep a little better at night…."
"We mourn the loss of people because of their impact in our lives. When I lost you the first time, it had a profound effect on everything, just as losing Antiope did." Diana continued on, not in the least bit discouraged by his melancholy. "And then came Charlie, Etta, Samir… I started to grow more used to the idea that people do not stay with us forever. But, I tried not to see it as a final endpoint, rather as when friendships take divergent paths. That is how I prepared for it." She gently steered his head up until he was forced to open his eyes and look at her. "But, I can tell you that until my brush with death… I never felt any sort of peace. I had to take comfort in the knowledge that my loved ones no longer suffered, and even then, that feels like a hollow promise."
He sat up a little straighter. "But, you went through that funeral, you tortured yourself trying to prepare Vanessa - "
"Because I wanted to honor her." Diana smiled a bit, as if she was recalling a memory he unfortunately knew nothing about. "She was already in Elysium. I saw her there before I ascended. Being there, seeing everyone, knowing that they are truly not gone, not just taking it on faith, it finally brought me comfort." He felt her fingers slip down to his arm, then to find his hand, lacing their fingers together easily. "The funeral rites are not there for the dead, Jim. There are there to honor their impact among the living. But, we don't need to mourn them."
Jim tilted his head, trying to take all of that in. "What are you… I'm not sure I follow."
"I know things," Diana squeezed his hand gently. "I can do things that I couldn't before. While I have been able to steady and control some of that new awareness, I know it's still there, simmering within. And you and I have both seen the wonders of the Nexus, seen that the soul is truly everlasting in a timeless place after death. We won't be alone. We will know they are in Elysium, and with time… I think I could reach the Nexus as Apollo did."
Jim's eyes widened, mouth slightly agape as he realized what she was telling him. "You think you can… visit the Nexus. When you want to."
"We can." Diana said softly.
Without thinking, Jim found himself thinking of Athena's words regarding the unique way his immortality had been earned. "Right. Because where you go, I go."
She smiled, pulling him closer. "Yes. And I'm going to hold you to that now more than ever…" Before Jim could offer a snappy comeback, Diana stole a kiss, leaving the lingering flavor of cream and sugar on his lips.
It was a remarkably domestic thing, not exactly where he thought his life as a Starfleet captain would have taken him. He could feel the love in her touch, each caress. His worries melted away as he was profoundly reminded that when it came to Diana, loving her would always be more than enough.
He could definitely enjoy more domestic things, wholly unexciting and without interruption.
Jim's communicator chirped in his pocket. I jinxed myself… he thought as the two of them pulled away enough for him to pull the device free.
"Kirk here," He said, even as he gave Diana a sidelong, suffering glance.
"Captain," Spock began, impassive and stoic as always. "We have spotted an unusual stellar phenomenon and are dropping out of warp to perform a brief astronomical survey. Admiral Kent had no objections regarding his timeline."
Jim didn't bother to hide the massive roll of his eyes at his First Officer checking the ranking Admiral's schedule before even bothering to let him know he wanted to stop the ship. "I'm glad you checked the admiral's timetable, Mister Spock." Jim shot back in a not-so-subtle jab. "I suppose a pitstop won't hurt. What have you found?"
"We're not entirely certain, however, we have a number of theories. Ensign Jaylah has calculated that the most aesthetically pleasing vantage point of the phenomena will be from the starboard observation lounge, should you wish to view it without all of the scientific apparatus."
Genuinely amused by what he could sense was at least one backhanded mention of the new scientific equipment that Spock had still never fully tested out, Jim winked at Diana before he replied back. "Well, if Ensign Jaylah took the time to map out what's aesthetically pleasing, who are we to argue? Thank you again. Curious as to what you find. Kirk out."
Flipping his communicator closed, Jim had just long enough to put it away before the ship dropped out of warp and the bubble outside his windows was replaced by a starscape.
"What's that about?" Diana asked as Jim stood.
"I haven't the slightest, but we're about to find out." He said quickly, reaching out to help her up, if she desired. "Ready to go see?"
Diana took his hand and let him swing her to her feet, but her attention was immediately back on the coffee table. "You know, I think I want to take my ice cream - "
"Ooooh, no." Jim said with a grin, pulling her closer to him so she didn't go grab for it. "I'll put it back in the freezer."
"The observation lounge is a perfectly fair place to eat ice cream," She protested, but made no move to get out of his grasp.
"Sure, if I knew it would just be the two of us." Sidestepping away, he grabbed the bowls and made his way back over to his captain's galley. "But, do you have any idea the kind of hell I'd catch if we brought ice cream and didn't have enough for everyone else?" He returned in time to grab Diana's jacket at the couch and hand it to her. "They're like a bunch of kids at summer camp."
"Then, you already have an adequate understanding of what it will be like to teach at Starfleet Academy, I imagine." She said as she shrugged her jacket back on and zipped it up. "As I'm sure you'll be asked to do that after the next tour or so."
Jim was sure to give her a sufficiently insulted look before he followed her out the door. "How dare you. The day I teach in one of those stuffy classrooms is the day you take me to Atlantis."
"Deal." She said, never missing a beat as they headed to the turbolift.
Jim couldn't help but smile as he watched her walk ahead of him.
"I love you," He said, clearly amused by her.
Diana glanced back and flashed him a grin that made him temporarily forget where they were going. "And I love you. Forever."
Forever was going to be nice.
As it turned out, they had not been the only ones to receive Spock's recommendation for viewing the stellar phenomena. When Diana arrived in the lounge, Jim in tow and still teasing her as they traded what they thought would be the most boring jobs they could have in Starfleet, she spotted Conner and Kal at the bar, the two of them talking softly and chuckling over some anecdote they were sharing.
"Kal…" Diana said warmly, walking over to pat his back affectionately. "I've hardly seen the two of you since we arrived back on the ship. I trust that you've had a good time?"
Kal glanced over at her, smiling that dopey farmboy grin that she had grown to miss so very much. "This is a ship of dreams. And Conner and I have had a lot to catch up on, so… sorry I haven't been terribly social."
"You don't have to apologize, Kal." She said with a smile. "You've had to wait a long time to see each other. I'm just glad you came aboard."
"So am I." Jim piped up from behind Diana as he reached across the bar to pull a bottle of scotch and two highball glasses. "The Admiral's been far less of a sourpuss since the two of you reconnected."
Conner's unenthused look Jim's direction made the whole group laugh, but he simply replied with, "Be careful I don't demote you, Kirk."
"You'd never do that, you don't want to have to find my replacement." Jim said, never missing a beat as he poured a couple of drinks.
"You're right. Besides, dad and I will need to figure out how to trade off with the suit again." Conner said with a pointed glance at Diana. "Seems silly that the world should only have one Superman."
Diana turned to look at Kal, honestly speechless. For centuries, he had been unwilling to go home, to reclaim the legacy he had made. And now, both of them were ready to usher in a new age. Together.
The doors to the lounge opened behind them once more. Diana turned, wondering who else was joining them, only to find that it was majority of the senior staff. Doctor McCoy, Lieutenants Uhura and Sulu, Ensign Jaylah and Commander Spock.
The new arrivals were not lost on Jim, either. Narrowing his eyes at the group, he motioned between them and simply asked, "Is there anyone on the bridge right now?"
"Chief Engineer Scott requested a brief turn at the conn for the purposes of this survey," Spock replied. "I saw no harm in granting the request."
"Really?" Jim chuckled. "Well, good for him." Now that there were others in the lounge, he was now retrieving and filling more glasses for those who were interested. Without trying, an impromptu social gathering had cropped up, even though Diana still didn't know what precisely they were there for.
"Jaylah," Diana asked, going directly to the source. "What are we about to see?"
She had clearly just been waiting for the opportunity to say what she had found. Quickly, she made her way over to the viewport and motioned to the bright mass to everyone's left. It was covered in a haze of what seemed to be space matter of some kind. "Any minute now, it should finish burning off the excess."
"What is burning off excess?" Jim asked as he followed Diana and Jaylah to the viewport.
"What Ensign Jaylah is trying to hold back for dramatic tension is that you are witnessing the birth of a star, Captain." Spock said, stealing the thunder from the younger ensign much to her chagrin.
Yet, Diana was enthralled. Of all the wonders she had seen in her life, she had never bore witness to the birth of one of the greatest cosmic forces in the universe.
The haze burned off around the bright light and the viewport immediately compensated by shading the windows.
"It is now a star." Jaylah said with a grin. "We could have been flying all our lives and never seen this."
"That does seem like a one-in-a-million kind of thing," McCoy said, although Diana could tell he wasn't sure if he liked those odds or hated them.
"So, if we saw it first, that means we get to name it, right?" Jim asked the room as he sipped his drink.
"I believe so, although you may find yourself arguing for the position with Mister Scott," Spock said wryly.
"I don't he'll object to it." Casually, Jim slipped his arm around Diana's shoulders and pulled her a little closer. "Given where we are right now, we're on a pretty direct trajectory for Messier 29, right?" He glanced back at Spock. "My stellar cartography is kind of rusty, but that sounds right." His first officer nodded, but Diana found herself wondering what exactly he had up his sleeve. "Then, it would be part of the constellation of Cygnus back on earth." He glanced down at Diana. "So, Vanessa would be a good name, don't you think?"
Diana's eyes widened as she considered his proposal. She nodded, trying to figure out how to thank him, but she found her throat had closed up again. It wasn't necessarily because of his suggestion, but rather the way he had come to it.
The gods had honored great heroes in many ways over the centuries, but there was one honor as sacred as the right of godhood itself.
Thank you, Athena…
Vanessa had received the blessing of the gods. She would be forever immortalized in the heavens, as Orion or Heracles themselves.
As Jim hugged her a little tighter, Diana leaned against him and allowed herself to take stock in those blessings she had received. It was true, she had always sought to be worthy of the blessings from the gods, of the gifts she received.
But, now, more than anything, she was grateful for them.
All those years ago when she had rescued Steve Trevor from the wreckage of a German biplane, she had no way of knowing the great destiny she had been set upon. She had only been a princess helping a spy to save people against a war. Since then, she had been many things: teacher, civilian, hero, soldier, leader, and Queen. But, she had always done so without her family, without Steve, and over time, without the friends that had pulled her out of the shadows.
For the first time since leaving Themyscira in 1918, with Jim's warm embrace and the mutually astonished voices of the crew around her, Diana was no longer alone.
And she never would be again.
Author's Note:
We have officially reached the conclusion of Star Trek: Age of Wonder and I can't believe it's here. When I came up with this concept, it was after having seen Wonder Woman about 5 times and falling in love with the crazy idea that Steve Trevor's reincarnation could be none other than James T. Kirk from the Kelvin timeline. As a lifelong comics fan (DC and Marvel), as well as having been raised literally from birth as a Trekkie, this was just going to be a fun labor of love for me to write a few episodes and play in this world. But, I realized very quickly this wasn't a small project, and I don't know if you've noticed, but in 6 months, I've written over 300,000 words, the volume of 3 books.
And I certainly would never have gotten this far, or been able to finish it without the amazing support and love from all of you readers. And I also want to thank my wife, who was both my beta and my story collaborator. A lot of what you guys love she helped me tie together and allowed me to talk her ear off for hours as I worked through how precisely Cale survived the Eugenics War and how to drop hints of Cale's involvement in Starfleet, up to and including kidnapping Jaylah, without giving it all away too soon. So, thank you, Kris, I love you and you're awesome for indulging me on the insane manic pace and schedule I held myself to make sure I never missed a day I wanted to publish and never got off-track.
Also, thank you, Patty Jenkins, Gal Gadot, Chris Pine, Simon Pegg, J.J. Abrams, Karl Urban and the rest of those involved with Star Trek and Wonder Woman for making me want to write this. I haven't taken on a project this big ever and I feel amazing for it. And thanks, creative commons licenses for existing so I can write fanfiction.
As of right now, I'm prepping a small follow-up to this fic that will be known as Ambassador's Logs: Supplemental. When that goes up, you'll be able to find missing scenes, extra stories and maybe even a full episode or two. That won't have a timed schedule, but you can always expect a random surprise of me dropping fun stuff from this and from beyond. I have some new ideas for my next fics, but I don't know if anything will ever be as long or make me quite as proud as this fic has.
If you've never left me a comment, please drop me a line when you finish, even if it's a just a quick wave. I'd love to know you read it, if you liked it, and tell me what you liked. Or scream at me in keyboard smash, I'm fine with that, too.
I hope you all enjoyed entering this Age of Wonder.
I know I did. I was happy to be allowed to play here for a while.
Thanks.
- Cassie (Tumblr: RobinsGirlWonder)