Still in pain, but I'm not allowed out of bed. The only thing left to do is type until the medicine knocks me out. I'm sure that all of you are so upset by all of these updates, too.

I was better off dead.

Those weren't the words that usually sprung to the forefront of Eleni's mind whenever she woke, but the pair of violet eyes bearing down on her made her reconsider living. The thin chemise she'd been forced to wear wasn't exactly Eleni's choice of armor for this confrontation, either. In her mind, she had imagined telling her grandmother the truth under very different circumstances. Having her grandmother interrogate her, while she laid bandaged up in the palace infirmary after almost dying had not been a part of her original plans.

Eleni couldn't meet Alanna's stare. Letting out a frustrated sigh, she moved her head to the side, closing her eyes at the headache that had begun to build. "I suppose you're going to yell now?" It probably wouldn't serve as the best way to begin the conversation, but Eleni already knew the outcome. She'd be shipped home, no matter what the king and her grandfather said, especially after this debacle.

Alanna tried to ignore the involuntary wince her granddaughter gave her when she tried to smooth out her hair. "Well," she responded after a few moments of silence. "It all depends on your explanations, little one."

Three days of watching over her granddaughter and praying had brought Alanna clarity. There were many ways to go about the issue, but she would not commit the same errors she was guilty of when raising Alianne. She would listen to what Eleni had to say, her reasons for lying for so long. Maybe, there was some logic behind her actions. At least, she hoped there was some logical thought inside her little head.

"I didn't want to go through what Lady Knight Keladry went through." The response was quick and simple, something Eleni had spent the past two years perfecting. It was heartbreaking in its honesty. "There were too many things to weigh me down as a girl. Being a boy was easier," Eleni brought up her bandaged hands to angrily wipe away the unbidden tears. Fighting back sniffles, she continued, "And it was, Grandmother, it really was. There were some problems, because I was the Lioness' grandson, but I was usually just another boy." Eleni didn't refuse the handkerchief her grandmother offered. "It went well enough for you, when you did it. I thought that I could do it too." Her words trailed off, unsure of how to ask, beg, her grandmother to let her stay, to not send her back to the typhoon of rage that was Alianne.

"That there is a coward's way out, Eleni Crow." Alanna might as well have struck the girl, for all the damage her words did. "Do you know what made Keladry strong enough for knighthood?" She gave Eleni time to respond, although it soon becams apperant that she would speak. "Resistance, from courtiers, from her fellow pages, from common people who didn't know any better," she explained. "She had to fight to gain her shield, and she learned to value her shield because of those small battles. Training for knighthood was never meant to be easy, Eleni. You were cheating yourself if you thought a disguise and years of lying would get you anything."

"I'm sorry." She really could say much more beyond that.

Alanna ruffled Eleni's red hair and brushed it off her forehead. "Don't apologize, little, learn. That's all I'm asking."

Through the guilt and the tears, not to mention he shame of having been caught in her lie, Eleni had difficulty processing her grandmother's words.

"That's it?" she asked warily. "Nothing more?"

"Well," Alanna said evasively as she rose to her feet. "There is one more round in this gauntlet, little one." Eleni watched apprehensively as Alanna went to the door and spoke to someone. When the king entered, Eleni felt herself shrink into the blankets around her. "Jon said that he already knew about this, that George told him a long time ago." Alanna looked angry, but it was probably directed at her husband for keeping unnecessary secrets from her. "He has a few things to say to you, Eleni, dear."

When Eleni had first faced the king she meant to serve as a knight, she had been impressed by the grand man before her. This man and the man she remembered were not the same person. This man was broken, lost almost, suffering from a burden that he could barely shoulder, let alone move forward while baring it. All the same, despite the haggard appearance and weary look in his eyes, this man was Jonathan of Conte. Eleni could only wonder what had happened to make him deteriorate like this. If gaunt look to his face didn't make it obvious that he was exhausted, the way he collapsed on the recently vacated chair said it all. King Jonathan was tired out.

"Hello, again, Eleni." Despite his appearance, he tried to act as if few things had changed in the past few days. "It seems your grandmother found out our little secret." The attempt at humor was weak, but Eleni appreciated it all the same. "I know we didn't specify what would happen if you were discovered, but given the circumstances," Jon trailed off. He really didn't want to do this, to do as he had promised. Things would never be easy for her after this moment, and Jon would have preferred to spare her the troubles to come. "I was convinced to let you remain for the duration of your training."

The decision had been taken from him, and now he only hoped that they wouldn't come to regret it.

The sparkle that returned to Eleni's violet eyes spoke of gratitude, but Jonathan wasn't too sure. How long would it be before the young girl would lament her choices in life, before she regretted that her elders hadn't stepped in and made the choice for her?

A knock at the door brought the king back to the present and away from his thoughts of the future. There were a few visitors that had insisted on seeing Eleni, and they had already waited most patiently. If nothing else, it showed the king and his champion that not everyone would shun the fiery girl on the bed. There were still some people who cared for her, and that might be what made the biggest difference. They both knew that the people who stood at your sides were the people who mattered.

"Eleni," her grandmother's words had turned gentle. She'd already chastised her grandchild, done her duty as an adult. Now, it was time to become her friend, to be the overindulgent grandparent the opportunity presented. "A few of your friends have been waiting to speak to you."

She was more than a little afraid, but Eleni lifted her chin defiantly and grinned. "I would hope so, Grandmother." She wouldn't grovel or beg, because that would accomplish nothing. The truth would be calmly explained, and hopefully they would remain friends. If not, then she would find strength from her solitary existence.

If the overjoyed rabbled that gleefully entered the room when Alanna opened the door was any indication of how her friends felt about her, then Eleni had few worries. Jon and Alanna left without another word, knowing how important it was for the friends to reassure each other. As they walked away from the infirmary, the aging king reached out for his friend's hand. After so many years and trials, they both both remembered how vital it could be to have a companion to lean on.

Happily surrounded by her friends, Eleni enjoyed the feeling of being accepted. The last two years had been spent fretting over how they would receive the news when she chose to reveal herself, but it seemed so easy now.

Kyle refused to let go of her arm, apologizing over the whole ordeal, although, he had nothing to be sorry for. Devin, thinking that all women were the same, had brought her flowers. They'd all enjoyed a good laugh at that poor attempt to follow Lord Padraig's advice on how to treat women.

The happy reunion didn't come without a few harsh words, however. Varrick would have killed her himself for being so reckless, but Warren kept him at bay. They were only worried, and perhaps a little upset, that she hadn't chosen to confide in them. Simon said that he understood her motivation, his father having trained with Lady Knight Keladry. Eleni wasn't completely wrong in wanting to avoid the petty fights and bigotry that came along when a girl chose to train for knighthood.

Schuylar was a little detached, wary even. He had thought that he had known Myles of Pirate's Swoop well enough, but it turned out that he was very wrong. He had been fooled, cleverly so, but it didn't bother him the slightest. That it didn't bother him disturbed him. Shrugging off the feeling, Schuylar decided that he might not have known Myles, but that he certainly did know the person in front of him. That was all that mattered, and he would just begin to learn more about Eleni Crow.

Eleni almost managed to relax, to feel at ease with her friends. It worked, until she realized that one person wasn't there to see her. She couldn't blame him, but she was going to begrudge him his petty sexism.

Alexander of Tirragen could burn for all that Eleni cared, because he obviously didn't care about her. Who needed pretty distractions anyway?

Please, don't be angry! Alex can't forgive things so easily, and their friendship had a rather shaky foundation. I promise that all that is wrong with the world will be corrected in due time!

Also, the poll on my profile page is still open! Please, vote on it, because it will come in handy later.