*explicit language, depression, panic attacks, verbal abuse, hints of owner/pet relationship, past child abuse, self-hatred, self-doubt, self-harm, emotional/psychological abuse, emotional manipulation, mind manipulation, night terrors, suicide attempts, suicide, blood and dust, detailed violence, dirty jokes, etc.
You have been warned. Enjoy yourself, mate.
Flowey couldn't understand life anymore. He didn't know why he kept this angry facade up. He didn't know what to call himself. He didn't know why he kept waiting here as if they would actually come.
He just didn't know anymore.
How long has it been since _,_,_,_,_ went on their rampage anyway? A month? three? six? A year? Two years? He didn't bother keeping track of the time, he had stopped trying a long time ago, even before the resets started. It was just too tedious to try anymore. (hah, look at him, thinking like that smiley trashbag.)
What was he?
This unwelcome question made him pause in the anxious bouncing on his stem, his faux smile slipping into an uncertain grimace. That made him realize something, unnerving and perhaps pathetic: he didn't know what he was anymore, he didn't know who he was anymore. Was he still Asriel? Or was he just Flowey? Perhaps he was neither, perhaps he's just a soulless husk of a creature.
The reminder that he was soulless brought in a new pang of bitter anger and- wait, was that loneliness he felt? He was soulless, he can't feel anything! He wasn't supposed to feel anything! He wasn't... supposed... to... feel... emotions... but?
Flowey looked down at the grass around his stem, and to his shock, he realized that his eyes were wet. He was crying. But he was flower! He wasn't supposed to feel emotion!
"H- huh?!" he jolted when he heard the voice, and he looked up. It was another human... And damn, she was tall. Or maybe it was just how small he was that made him think that.
"Howdy!" he faked a grin and began to bounce on his stem. "I'm Flowey, Flowey the flower! You're probably pretty confused, buddy, but don't worry; I'll be your guide!"
Despite his disbelief, he felt something he hadn't known for a very long time.
"Okay!" the human immediately accepts his help, and Flowey's shocked. He hasn't gotten such an easy compliance since Frisk... Who was this weirdo?
Maybe it wasn't hopeless, maybe he wasn't doomed to be soulless forever, maybe they can all have a happy ending after all.
"Alrighty! Ready?"
"Yes, mister Flowey!" huh. Nobody called him that before. Interesting.
...Hah, what a joke...
He initiates a fight and begins his explanation as the world turns black 'n white. "Your soul-"
"I know about souls and ENCOUNTERS, mister Flowey!" the human- he was finally able to distinguish her as a female- declared, and he found himself surprised again.
Flowey summoned some bullets. "Then you probably know what I'm about to do, don't cha?" the girl winced, but she nodded and got into a defensive position.
The flower laughed numbly at himself. He was an IDIOT to think he of all creatures could ever have a happy ending. There was no happy ending. Just like Fr- Just like the fallen angel, this human will turn sour and kill them all. Then she'll reset. Then she'll kill them all again. Reset. Kill. Reset. Kill. Reset. Kill. Reset. Kill.
DODGE.
Over.
DODGE.
And.
DODGE.
Over.
DODGE.
And.
DODGE.
OVER!
-19.
Finally! Stars, this kid is even harder to strike than _!
He thought back on the monsters he had stalked- Ew! Not stalked, observed- while he summoned some pellets to end the pitiful human's life.
He wondered how the smiley trashbag was faring. He hadn't visited Snowdin since the very last reset. Even HE felt pity for that pathetic bundle of bones. _ had treated Sans... really unpleasantly. Flowey shuddered when he remembered the things he saw the small skeleton endure. Yeah, he was definitely checking on that stupid smiling trashbag later.
...He didn't care! Don't even suggest that he did. He felt pity, nothing more!
He heard a gasp and saw something flying at him from the corner of his eye, and without needing to look at who his attacker was, he slunk into the ground and retreated from the area.
He then thought about Papyrus. Did he ever get into the royal guard? He kind of doubted it; Papyrus was way too soft for something like that. Then again, he reluctantly admitted to himself, that stupid pacifist was actually pretty damn strong when he wanted to be. During the time he talked to the skeleton, he also learned that Papyrus knew more than he let on.
He popped up in an area nearby to watch them interact, and he realized that the human had fainted. How peculiar...
The fish lady and her crush suddenly stormed in his thoughts. Had those two lovesick idiots confessed to each other yet? Is Undyne still captain of the royal guard? Had Alphys told anyone of her, ah, "failed experiments"?
Flowey watched as the former queen scooped up the human and began to carry her away, and he bitterly smiled at the concern in those red-tinted eyes.
Then, for whatever stupid reason, Mettaton and Napstablook came to mind. Did Mettaton finally get the hell OVER HIMSELF? Did he finally get that "fabulous" body he wanted? What about Napstablook? Did that self-depreciating ghost finally accept himself? He doubted it.
Flowey found himself thinking about his family as he followed the goat lady. He though about Toriel; his loving and punny mother. About Asgore; his fluffy pushover of a father. About Chara; his sibling and very best friend.
He missed them so much...
Bitter tears stung his eyes, and he hastily wiped them away with his leaf. He wasn't weak. He wasn't weak! He was soulless, he shouldn't think about them! He couldn't love them anyway.
What's the point in remembering them when you can't feel anything for them?
He snorted at his own stupidity. He was such a fucking idiot, even more so than this stupid, merciful human. Flowey looked up, and cursed when he figured out they were long gone.
He really needed to stop getting lost in thought. He was the god of HYPERDEATH!
... He's got his father's sense of creativity, doesn't he?
For the first time in a while, Flowey was filled with HOPE.