A/N: Thanks for not hating me too much after the last chapter.

Corinne, Thank you for always polishing Luke's Britishisms and for always being a constant support. xx

o~O~o
Chapter 32
Stitches and Setbacks
o~O~o

Beca threw herself on the bed. She hated that Jesse had the ability to ruin something so special with his crappy attitude and ugliness. She hated that his words could be so cutting and cruel. But what she hated even more was that she allowed his words to affect her so negatively. At that very moment she could admit that she hated her husband. She absolutely, positively, unequivocally hated him with every fiber of her being and that feeling scared her because that was the first time she had ever admitted that she hated him.

He called her fat!

But it wasn't about that. She knew she wasn't fat, she was comfortable enough in her own skin to know and understand that. Sure the jeans she tried to wear that day were more snug than usual and they were extremely uncomfortable when she buttoned them but she most certainly was not fat. She'd showered, put on her best perfume, curled her hair and all for what? A barrage of abuse and cruel insults. She now understood why wives suddenly snapped and put rat poison in their husbands favorite meals.

"Sorry, little one." Beca said as she gently rubbed her barely there pooch. "I don't know how or when, but I promise that I'll make things right with your Daddy… even if it kills one of us."

She had the perfect evening planned and blurting out that she was pregnant then calling him an asshole was not on her agenda. She had just gone to Dr. Kaiser's office to have it confirmed that afternoon after quickly taking a test when she got home after realizing what the date was when talking to Cynthia Rose at the grocery store. She could admit to herself that she was scared. She needed the sensitive part of Jesse to hold her and reassure her that the same bad shit wasn't going to happen again and that he would be by her side the whole time.

Dr. Kaiser had done her best to ease Beca's fears and said that they would be monitoring her more closely during this pregnancy and she would have more frequent appointments and ultrasounds. It hadn't alleviated all of Beca's concerns but after Dr. Kaiser had suggested a full medical work up, Beca felt a lot calmer.

She had thought Jesse would be shocked, surprised even, given the amount of time they'd spent apart in recent months but she didn't expect the look of horror on his face when she snapped at him. What was it going to take to make him happy? Beca honestly thought that once they were married things would get better but, with Jesse traveling two to three weeks out of the month, how could they? She had been a fool. Everyone tried to warn her. Everyone tried to tell her but as always, she knew better than anyone else and now, she was pregnant with a baby that Jesse didn't want or care about.

"What the fuck is wrong with me?" Beca sobbed, pulling a pillow towards her and crying into the feathery softness. "Why can't I just make my husband happy?"

o~O~o

Hours later, Jesse was nowhere to be found in the house, although Beca would admit that she didn't look in every single room. Finding no obvious trace of him anywhere, she cleared away the ruined dinner, put the dishes back in the cabinet and cleaned the kitchen. She played the dogs, who looked surprised to see her up this late in the evening. This was usually their time to settle in for the night. As she tickled their silky ears, Jagger whimpered, sensing his mistress was unhappy.

Beca, not knowing what to do with herself, gave each of the dogs a new bone, collected her phone and her car keys and headed out of the front door. As she backed out of the driveway and drove to the bottom of the hill, she intended to head to Luke's until she remembered he was away on business on the East Coast. Beca decided she would just drive for a while until she felt tired enough to go back home and rest but she soon found herself at Aubrey's house sitting in the driveway and working up the nerve to knock on the door.

She wasn't quite sure how she'd ended up at Aubrey's at two in the morning but when she saw the kitchen light come on, followed by the light in the family room, he knew Aubrey or Ben would be up with one or both of the babies. She hated the thought of disturbing the new parents but fished around in her purse for the pregnancy test she'd hidden in there that afternoon to keep Jesse from finding out her secret before she was ready to tell him.

Beca was still deciding about whether to go in or not, when the blinds twitched in the family room. Slipping out of the car, she walked slowly to the door, each step causing her to sob, angry that she was at her cousin's house in the middle of the night.

When she finally knocked, Aubrey immediately knew something was wrong as she pulled on the door and held it open just enough for her cousin to slip through. It wasn't like Beca to just show up without calling and Aubrey could see she was shaking as she guided her into the family room and passed Penny to her. Aubrey was still feeding Pru and knew Beca needed something to hang onto so that she looked less sick and worried. Her tearstained face was another dead give away that something was not right but Aubrey knew to tread carefully with her questions so that Beca would open up.

Beca tried to bullshit Aubrey by saying that she had come to visit as she needed to sniff the babies and wanted some snuggle time with them. She even tried to convince Aubrey that she and Ben should go out to dinner and a movie while she stayed with the girls until Aubrey pointed out that it was the middle of the night. Aubrey made it clear that she wasn't buying what Beca was selling and fixed her best resting bitch face on her cousin until Beca began to feel uncomfortable. She knew her Beca like the back of her own hand and she also knew when something was wrong. She wasn't going to take any of Beca's bullshit excuses. This was one of those times that Aubrey knew Beca needed her to be stern and straightforward. There was definitely something rotten in Denmark and Aubrey was pretty damn sure that it started and ended with Jesse Swanson.

After giving Beca the equivalent of the Spanish inquisition for the better part of an hour and three cups of hot tea later, Aubrey was finally able to get Beca to stop shaking and start talking. Once Beca started talking she didn't stop until she spilled everything that had happened with Jesse that evening, her concerns about him since they got married and for the future… right down to the fact that she was pregnant.

"Beca, why do you keep doing this to yourself?" Aubrey asked, her voice full of concern as she laid Pru down in a pink, frilly, lacy Moses basket.

Beca had the decency to look somewhat ashamed. "Because, I love him Aub… I can't imagine life without him."

"I understand that but Bec… now there's a baby involved."

"And I want this baby more than anything-"

"-Yeah, you do… but what about Jesse? What does he want?"

Beca's eyes filled with tears. "... I don't know."

"This is going to sound extremely insensitive, but I'm going to ask anyway." Aubrey said. "Have you ever stopped to think that Jesse wasn't meant to be a father and that Bodhi died because Jesse is unfit?"

Beca gasped at Aubrey's harsh words. "Aubrey!"

"Jesse had a rough upbringing… right?"

"Yes, but what does that have to do with anything?"

"Beca… please don't hate me for what I'm about to say. Bodhi's gone… maybe he's gone because God thought Jesse wasn't fit and-"

"-Whoa… wait just one damn minute." Beca said, her hackles standing on end. "You think God punished me and my son because of Jesse? Where do you get off?"

"Beca…"

"Don't you dare 'Beca' me!"

"I'd rather drag my naked body through a mile of broken glass and end up in a pool of lemon juice then waste five more minutes of my precious time listening to you cry over Jesse." Aubrey said as she took Penny from Beca and placed her in the basket next to her sister. Pru instinctively reached out for Penny as Aubrey collected their tea cups and headed out towards the kitchen.

Sniffling, Beca looked up at Aubrey's retreating back. "That's a bit drastic… dontcha think?" She said following Aubrey to the kitchen.

"No, I don't. He continues to hurt you and I for one am sick and tired of it." Aubrey said, pulling open the dishwasher door and loading the dirty things into it. "Beca, I love you but I can't bear to see you in anymore pain. Your life has turned into a bad episode of the Dr. Phil show."

"Aubrey… you don't know everything he's been through."

"You're right and unless you tell me, there's no possible way for me to know everything." She said, closing the dishwasher and indicating for Beca to go back into the family room.

"Then please, don't judge him."

Aubrey turned around and faced Beca, who took a seat on the edge of the sofa, reaching over to pick up one of the twins who had started to whimper. "Listen Bec, I have to be honest, I don't care if he was abducted by leprechauns and whacked over the head with their shillelagh sticks, nothing gives him the right to treat you the way he has and continues to do. You are not his commodity or a play thing and..." Aubrey said very matter of fact. "... and you… you're a damn fool for taking it."

"You don't have any right to speak to me that way!" Beca said, standing up and walking threateningly toward Aubrey. "Keep it up and I'll knock you into the middle of next week."

"Then I will kick your sorry ass on Thursday!" Aubrey told her as she stood up and towered over Beca. She and Aubrey had had arguments before but they never took this type of turn. They had never threatened each other with violence, even if they had no intention of going through with their threats. "Now pull your head out of your teeny, tiny little ass and listen for once."

Beca knew Aubrey was right. She was being naive about everything but she wanted to believe in her husband and their marriage. Aubrey was right… they needed to talk about this. She needed a swift kick in the ass. She nodded her answer to Aubrey.

"Beca… is he drinking again?"

"No, I don't think so." Beca responded as she sat on the couch. She had to admit that Aubrey's question stirred something inside of her that made her wonder.

"You got rid of all of the booze in the house… right?"

Beca looked puzzled. "Yes, I did that a long time ago. Why?"

"Do you monitor his spending? Check his pockets for receipts? Look in the trunk of his car for tell tale signs that he's stashing booze in there?"

"No. I've never gone through his personal stuff. I would know... if... I would know if... something was wrong." Beca said, but the feeble tinge to her tone set alarms bells ringing.

"As much as I hate to say this, you need to start monitoring things like cough syrup, hand sanitizer, mouthwash, perfume and nail polish remover."

"Umm… why would I do that?"

"News Flash Beca… he's an alcoholic and he always will be. Rehab can't and won't change that. Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic."

"Yeah, I know but what are you getting at?"

"I've read up on alcoholism. There are a lot of household items that have alcohol in them and an alcoholic will stop at nothing for a buzz."

Beca's jaw dropped. She hadn't thought about everyday household things being a temptation for Jesse. She thought that by removing the booze that she was removing the temptation when in all actuality she was just causing him to turn to something else.

"Remember me telling you about Ben's uncle who would fill up any available container with alcohol and even soaked cotton balls in liquor and stored them in the freezer. Anything from prescription tubes, soap bottles, discarded-"

"-I have to go." Beca said abruptly.

"Beca… wait!" Aubrey called after her but it was too late. Beca was already out of the door.

o~O~o

Beca cried the entire drive home. Could Aubrey be right? Was Jesse being resourceful and drinking household items to get a fix? If he was, then he was a lot sicker than she or anyone else thought. Should she reach out to Donald, Jesse's sponsor, and find out if he had been attending meetings? Beca knew that alcoholism was a very slippery slope and she prayed that Jesse hadn't gone back to old habits. If he had, she knew there was no chance for them to ever make it, not as long as Jesse chose booze over her and their family.

When Beca got home, haphazardly abandoning her car in the driveway, she searched the house for Jesse but didn't find him. She grabbed a trash can and started going through every cabinet in the house to find anything that had alcohol in it. She noticed that the brand new bottle of mouthwash she bought the week before was almost empty as was the bottle of cough syrup the doctor gave Jesse when he was in the hospital. Looking at the pharmacy label closer, she noticed that all the refills were gone as well. Aubrey was right… Jesse was drinking again, even if it wasn't in the traditional sense.

In a very drastic move, Beca stopped reading the labels and threw everything out. All of it. She silently decided that she would give Silvana a monthly stipend to buy cleaning supplies to bring back and forth with her. Beca didn't want any of it in the house… not a drop.

Suddenly, Beca had another thought, if everything was gone, then Jesse would know that something was up. He would know that she was on to him. She knew the best way to get him better was for him to admit that he had a problem, not for him to be confronted by it all. Reluctantly, Beca put everything back, exactly how she found it and vowed to monitor everything in the house as best she could. She collected her phone and took photos of everything, hoping that would give her a good indication of what was being used on a daily basis and whether or not it was being used for the right reasons. She hated that she had to be like that but if it meant staying awake until all hours to do it, then that's what she'd do. She wasn't quite ready to accept that he was beyond help just yet. When she took her wedding vows, she meant every word she said and made a commitment to see Jesse through this latest setback.

She didn't sleep that night, just laid on her bed with her phone for company. She kept her bedroom door open so she could hear if Jesse was moving around in the house. As the dogs began to fuss downstairs, she slowly slid off her bed and went downstairs to let them out into the yard. She then called Sawyer, despite it being early, and told him that she needed to take some personal time. Sawyer could tell by the tone in her voice that something was up and told her to work at home for a week until she'd got things sorted.

For the next three days, Beca sat waiting for Jesse.

She waited...

… and waited.

… and waited.

There were no phone calls or texts. She checked her emails constantly and fended off Aubrey's attempts to reach out to her. She called her parents and told them she was ok but needed some space and Anne and Will had passed knowing glances over the phone at each other.

She sat in the house in radio silence wondering where he was and what he was doing. She wasn't hungry but knew she had to keep eating for the sake of the baby she was carrying. Picking at food, she jumped up every time she heard a noise in the house but it was usually one of the puppies messing around. She reorganized the hallway closet, polished all of the mirrors in the house and got the stain out of the hallway rug that had been there for a couple of months. She thought about Jesse constantly and wondered where his head was and where she'd gone so wrong that her marriage had fallen apart before it even started. Beca was beating herself over potentially missing the signs. She really wasn't all that surprised. He didn't talk to her about anything lately. He had told her once before that he wasn't good at talking or communicating. His walls were so high and impenetrable that Beca didn't know what to do to get through to him. She found herself wondering what she had gotten herself into and on the afternoon of the third day, began to question whether it was all worth it.

Frustrated with the entire situation and needing something else to do, Beca took the puppies out in the backyard and sat on the morning porch with a glass of milk and a handful of cookies. She sat with the sun on her face and as she watched the puppies wrestle around in the grass, she noticed something in the bottom of the pool and went down the steps of the porch to have a better look.

Upon further inspection, she realized it was Jesse's cellphone and couldn't understand how it had ended up in the deep end of the pool. Immediately, her thoughts turned to fear as she realized something really bad might have happened to Jesse. Looking around for any more clues, she couldn't see anything amiss. When she turned around to get the pool net from the side of the guest house, she noticed that the front door of the guest house was ever so slightly ajar. She immediately became concerned that someone had broken in and was squatting in her guest house. Pulling her cell phone from her pocket and calling the puppies to follow her, she cautiously walked toward the guest house, trying not to trip over Roxie as she ran straight in front of her with her tail wagging. The closer she got, the more she wondered if she should have called the police, her dad or Luke, who had recently returned from his business trip.

The guest house was dark and as Beca slowly pushed the door open further, she called out. "Hello?" When no one answered, she slowly walked in and turned on the light. Beca looked around the room and was pleased to see that nothing looked broken, or out of place... until she looked down towards the floor. There were empty whiskey bottles on the counter, coffee table and the floor, alongside a couple of smashed glasses and one of the kitchen knives. She gasped at the sight in front of her and that's when she saw him lying on the floor between the sofa and the coffee table.

"Oh my God… Jesse!" She screamed as she ran over to him. She pushed the coffee table out of the way and dropped to her knees as the puppies began to bark at her outburst.

Jesse was sprawled out on the floor, with a deep gash on his forehead and cuts on his left hand. He was lying in a pool of blood and vomit with his right cheek pressed against the cold tiles. Beca reached over, pressed her fingers to his neck, tried to ignore the fact that Jesse's skin was cold to the touch, and felt for a pulse. While very weak, he did have a pulse so that meant that he was still alive… but judging by the fact that the blood and vomit were dry, he'd been there awhile.

She kept her hand on him the whole time so that he would know she was there and quickly called 9-1-1, breaking down on the phone as she requested an ambulance. They assured her they were on the way and she called the gatehouse to let them know that she called for the paramedics. They asked if she needed immediate assistance and after she whimpered out a yes, said they would be sending one of the security guards to come and unlock her front gate. Beca then called her parents who immediately collected their keys and were on the way before Beca hung up on her Mom to call Luke. He told her to try and get Jesse on his side and that he'd be there as quickly as he could. She remembered that the 9-1-1 dispatcher had said not to move him as something might have been broken when he fell. Kneeling beside him, she tried calling Casey as well but apparently he changed his cell number and Jesse hadn't given it to her.

"Jess… hang on baby, help is on the way." She told him, trying to rouse him by rubbing his face. "Wake up Jess… I'm here."

The puppies were taking turns climbing all over Jesse and licking the side of his face they could reach. They wanted to play and thought that he was ignoring them. At one point, Jagger began pulling on Jesse's shoe laces and growling while Roxie barked and bounced around. Beca tried to shoo them away but that made them play all the more.

As Beca silently prayed that she had found Jesse in time, she could hear the wail of the sirens as they got closer to the house. She got up suddenly, realizing that she was going to have to let the paramedics in as security didn't hold a front door key. Giving Jesse one last glance, she herded the puppies towards the house.

The next ten minutes passed in a blur as Beca took the paramedics out to the guest house to show them where Jesse had fallen. Luke arrived, unshaven and dishevelled, having just woken up when Beca called him. He took charge of the bounding dogs and locked them in the family room with some food and water to keep them out of the way. He then joined Beca as she waited just outside the guest house door.

"What happened?" He asked, immediately putting his arm around his best friend.

"I don't know." Beca said, melting into Luke's side as he held her close. He peered through the door and watched as the paramedics fixed a collar around Jesse's neck. "I haven't seen him in three days and found him just like that."

"It smells like a brewery in there." Luke commented, trying to carefully choose his words.

"It's ok, you can say it. He's clearly fallen off the wagon again." Beca admitted. "It's all my fault."

"Hey, don't say that." Luke said, hugging her a little tighter. "This is all Jesse's decision and if need be, we'll get him some help again."

"We?" Beca asked.

"Well, the two of you clearly can't be trusted on your own, can you?" Luke said and Beca looked up at him, a ghost of a smile on his lips. "Did you two have a barney?"

"Not really. We had words but not enough to send him out here by himself."

"What did you fight about?" Luke asked and for only the third time in their friendship did Beca consider not telling him the truth.

"I told him he was going to be a father again."

Luke didn't say anything, just wrapped both arms around Beca and held her tight. Beca nuzzled into his chest and felt comfort the first time in days. They both watched as the medics moved Jesse onto a spinal board and then onto a gurney to take him out to the waiting ambulance.

Following closely behind, Luke told Beca to get in the back of the ambulance with Jesse and that he would speak to her parents and tell them to go directly to the hospital and meet them there. Luke said he'd lock the house up, sort out the puppies and call Amy to come over to dog sit in case they'd be a while. Beca appreciated his direction and climbed in the back of the ambulance with Jesse.

The drive to the hospital was mercifully short and within a few minutes Jesse was being unloaded and taken straight through into the ER. Beca was sent to the front desk to give them Jesse's information before she took a seat outside of the cubicle he was in. She pulled her phone out of her pocket and sent Luke a text to let him know where she was.

She'd never been so happy to see her Mom and Dad than when they swept into the waiting room, full of support and determination and held her as she broke down for the first time. Aside from the early questions about how Jesse was doing, they sat in silence as the minutes ticked by.

"Do you want anything to eat?" Luke asked after an hour had passed. Beca shook her head despite the deep growling in her stomach which could probably be heard all around the hospital. "Well, at least come with me while I go and get something for all of us."

"What if Jesse needs me while-"

"-We'll call you if you need to come back." Will said and Anne nodded in confirmation beside him.

Reluctantly, Beca got up and took Luke's hand as they left the waiting room. She was cold, having left the house without a jacket. Luke noticed her shivering and took off his sweater, slipping it over her head despite her protests.

"Stop being a hero." She muttered, her head still inside the sweater as she sought solace as the smell of her best friend's clothes gave her familiar comfort.

"Stop being a brat then."

"Knob jockey."

"Such language from a pregnant lady." Luke said, tugging down the fabric over Beca's face after she failed to do it herself. "Seriously, you can't even dress yourself."

"Thank you for being here." Beca said, taking his hand again as they walked towards the cafeteria.

"It's cool."

"I know you hate Jesse and-"

"- I don't hate him." Luke interrupted. "I think he's a pillock but I don't hate him. He's the father of your child and... congratulations by the way."

"What if he doesn't get to see his baby?"

"Becs, Jesse is a fighter. He's hardcore and he's tough. Don't write him off before he's been given a chance."

"You almost sound like you are defending him."

"Yeah, well, don't get used to it. I'll be kicking his scrawny arse when he gets home."

"Thank you." Beca said as they walked up to the counter. "Thank you for coming to my rescue again, thank you for not judging me or him and if you are being judgemental, thank you for keeping it to yourself. You are always by my side when I need you."

"I didn't have an elsewhere to be."

"I'm glad."

"What are you going to have?" Luke asked, sweeping his hand in front of the glass chiller cabinets in an effort to change the subject.

"I'm really not hungry. I-"

"-Ham or turkey?" Luke said, ignoring her protest as he looked at the meagre offerings.

"Ham." Beca sighed, knowing full well it was pointless to argue with a Brit.

"I'll get a few in case your folks want anything." Luke offered, looking down at Beca who nodded, her eye catching something that did appeal.

"Maybe a donut?" She said quietly, looking over at the creme filled pastries.

Luke grinned as he collected a few things. Beca patted her pockets and was about to say to Luke that she had no money on her when he looked down at her and grinned. "I have got this, all right? What would you do without me huh?"

Beca couldn't answer that.

o~O~o

Six hours later, a doctor finally came into the waiting room to speak with Beca. She had long since sent her parents and Luke home, promising to call them as soon as she knew something and assured them she was fine on her own. Luke said he'd go to the house and wait with the puppies as he hadn't heard back from Amy. Her parents offered to wait with her but Beca said she'd call them as soon as she heard anything. There was really no sense in all of them sitting around waiting in an uncomfortable waiting room for Jesse's test results. It was only after she'd kissed her parents goodbye that she realized she'd not told them about the baby but somehow, it hadn't seemed like the right time. She laid down, pulling Luke's sweater around her and rested her head on a stack of magazines. It wasn't the most comfortable position but she'd barely slept for three days and was exhausted.

Dr. Nelson found where Beca was curled up sleeping and took the seat next to her. "Mrs. Swanson…" He said gently. "Mrs. Swanson…" He repeated as he tapped her on the shoulder.

"Dr. Nelson… I'm sorry." Beca said, as she quickly sat up and clutched her chest as the shocking start from her vivid dream caused her heart to beat fast. She'd been dreaming that she and Jesse were driving in a sports car along the highway and Jesse was driving way too fast. She was yelling at him to slow down and he wasn't listening to anything she was saying. The doctor had awakened her just as they ran a stop sign into a crowded intersection. "How's Jesse?"

"Jesse's is…" He took a deep breath and looked down at the small stack of notes in his hand. "... very sick. There is no easy way for me to say this. When he arrived, he was running a dangerously high fever, he was and still is severely dehydrated and suffering from alcohol poisoning. His blood alcohol level is currently 0.45 which is 0.37 over the legal limit. He has severe central nervous system depression and is currently in a coma. There is a very strong possibility of death due to respiratory arrest."

Beca suddenly wished that she hadn't sent everyone home and pulled Luke's sweater down over her hands. She was feeling overwhelmed and very alone as the doctor's words began to sink in. Dr. Nelson continued to talk, using words Beca couldn't understand. It was all too much for her and soon there was a strong wave of nausea that sent her in search of the nearest trash can. She wretched until there was nothing left in her system and just when she thought she was going to be ok, the dry heaves started. Her first thoughts weren't of her husband and his current condition but of her unborn baby. She couldn't lose another baby, she just couldn't.

"Mrs. Swanson… are you ok?" Dr. Nelson asked, his voice full of concern, as he came to find her clutching a wad of tissues in his hand.

Beca reached for a paper towel and wiped her mouth before walking toward the kitchenette for a glass of water. "I'm fine." She said a little too abruptly.

Dr. Nelson wasn't convinced. "Before we continue, I'll have one of the nurses come in and check you over just to be sure." He turned to head over to the nurses bank.

"I'm twelve weeks pregnant." Beca finally confessed as Dr. Nelson was about to walk out. "I'm twelve weeks pregnant, I lost our first baby in February and now I'm going to lose my husband. I can't lose this baby too." She said before slowing lowering herself into the closest chair and weeping.

"Mrs. Swanson, please make no mistake, we're doing everything we can to save your husband's life but a lot of the work is up to him. As hard as this will be to do under the circumstances, you need to rest and relax as the stress will do you and the little one no good whatsoever. Jesse has a long road ahead of him. He'll detox over the next week to ten days, which will be very hard to witness. Symptoms may be as mild as a headache or nausea but could be as severe at delirium tremens or DT's marked by seizures and/or hallucinations. Regardless of the severity of the symptoms, the detox process requires roughly the same amount of time. Has Jesse ever been to a rehab facility?"

Beca heard everything that Dr. Nelson had said but she was still trying to process all of it. She shook her head, to clear her thoughts. "Yes… yes, he's been to rehab. Last year around this time actually."

"Can you have those records sent over to me?"

"Yes, of course." Beca said. "Dr. Nelson… where do we go from here?"

Taking a deep breath Dr. Nelson looked at Beca and could not only see her pain but he felt it as well. "Well… I'll wait to make a definitive decision until after I see Jesse's rehab records, but I think that after he has fully detoxed, I'm going to recommend a forty five day outpatient program. In the meantime, we'll begin a regime of vitamin B1 supplements, along with folic acid and iron supplements to boost Jesse's overall health. Once he's conscious, he will also be given herbal teas and broths to gently maintain his hydration. If necessary, I may prescribe medications which can help to reduce his cravings and diminish the perceived pleasure of alcohol consumption."

"No!" Beca said very adamantly. "No, medications."

"Is there something else I should know about?"

Beca was embarrassed about what she was about to tell the doctor. "I just recently discovered that Jesse has been consuming household products and abusing medication that contain alcohol."

"What types of products and medications?"

"Nyquil, mouthwash, a bottle of my perfume is missing and some cough syrup… I can't remember the name of it. Anyway it was prescribed a few weeks ago when he was here for bronchitis."

Dr. Nelson wrote everything in Jesse's chart. "Ok… no, medications. Anything else?"

"The gash on his head?" Beca asked. "And what about his hand?"

"We had to debride all the wounds to make sure that there was no glass or dirt. We've stitched up his forehead. It was done in such a way that there will be minimal scarring. His hand has also been stitched up."

It was Beca's turn to take a deep breath. She wasn't entirely sure that she had fully absorbed all of the information Dr. Nelson had given her. "Ok… when can I see him?"

"I'll walk you back now."

Beca collected her phone before following Dr. Nelson out of the waiting room. As they began the long walk to the ICU where Jesse had been taken to after his initial assessment, Dr. Nelson continued to talk to Beca about Jesse. He questioned her as whether Jesse was displaying any other symptoms such as personality changes, loss of appetite, bruises, fatigue or itchy skin. Beca admitted that she had noticed all of those things but thought it was all due to the bronchitis, stress from getting the album finished and the general worries of life getting in the way. When Dr. Nelson explained that these were all very serious and that the nursing staff would continue to keep a very close eye on Jesse during his stay.

Beca noticed that the walls in all the ICU rooms were all glass so that the nurses could see the patients from the nurses station. There were curtains that could be pulled across when family was visiting or while the medical staff was in the room with the patients. She understood the need for the lack of privacy but wondered how Jesse would react once he'd woken up.

When they arrived at Jesse's room, Beca gasped. The room was very dimly lit and Jesse looked awful. He was lying so still. She hadn't expected to see all of the machines or hear all the beeping in what would otherwise be considered a quiet room.

Dr. Nelson patted her on the shoulder and said "Go on. If you need anything, hit the call button."

"Thank you." Beca whispered. She slowly walked in and dropped her phone on the chair next to the bed. Beca had to keep herself from slapping Jesse again instead she asked, "Why can't I be enough for you? Why?"

Beca sat quietly for hours, occasionally dozing on and off throughout the night, waking to get updates from the nurses as they came into the room to check Jesse's vitals. The night was long and exhausting. Beca couldn't get comfortable and all she really wanted to do was kick the living shit out of Jesse.

"What had he been thinking?"

"Why had he turned back to drinking?"

"Why didn't he talk to her about it?"

"Why didn't he call Donald when he first felt the urge to drink?"

She woke shortly after six thirty feeling stiff from sleeping in the chair all night. She was desperate for a good night's sleep and something hot to eat. After one of the nurses walked in to check on Jesse, bringing a cup of tea for Beca to enjoy while she watched the sunrise over Los Angeles, she was ready to leave. She was tired and stiff and beyond fed up. The longer she sat in the room with Jesse, the angrier she became. She needed to leave before the stress got too much. She picked up her phone and tapped out a message to the one person she knew would forgive her for the early morning wake up text.

"Please tell me you're awake."

"Morning sunshine. You ready to go home?"
"YES! Please come get me… NOW!"
"Be there in ten minutes."
"Just so you know... I'm done with Jesse."

A/N: Is Beca really done? Stay tuned to find out.