I feel I should preface this by saying that I am aware that everyone deals with things differently, and I am not saying that this is how someone should react etc, it is merely how these characters would.

And of course, if this is upsetting for some people for various reasons then I'm sorry in advance

Jess was simply staring forward at the white wall opposite her, a hand limply on her stomach over the papery gown she was wearing.

Since their worst fears had been confirmed she had sat, simply staring unseeingly at the wall as if it could make everything better.

Of course it wouldn't, nothing could.

Ana had dented her car in her hurry to get to the hospital when Gail had called her to tell her what was going on, and she was the only person that had managed to garner any type of response from Jess, standing beside her daughter as a doctor stood in front of her and told her about what was happening, and how they couldn't do anything.

Ana had seen the expression on Jess's face when the doctor muttered 'I'm terribly sorry' and knew that she was trying to stop herself from screaming and shouting at him. Instead she simply nodded and watched as he left.

Ana had placed a hand on Jess's shoulder and kissed her hair lightly 'I'm sorry I wasn't there'

Jess had looked up with a mix of genuine confusion and amazement, her voice quiet 'don't be. It wouldn't have changed anything'.

Ana had been well aware that the conversation was over as Jess looked back down at the floor, blinking o try and keep her tears at bay.

'Jess-'

'-I just want to be on my own… Does Caleb know?'

'I'll just be outside with Christian, he's rung Caleb… I'll be back in a few minutes, if you need me-'

'-I know'.

Ana had felt a lump in her throat at how completely and utterly broken her daughter looked before leaving to speak to Christian who was just outside the room, looking a state, his hair a mess, shirt half untucked, tie askew and he looked like he needed to vomit.

Grace was standing with her son, holding a beige folder with several pages of paper in it, looking gloomy as Ana joined them.

Grace kept her voice quiet 'I know that no one wanted to ask me but I checked her blood- she hasn't taken anything. Jess didn't cause this to happen, it was just nature'.

Ana sighed 'what do we do now?'.

'Medically? Nothing. She was very early on and the only thing we can do now is make sure that she doesn't have and complications etcetera, but that's unlikely at her age. She hadn't even come around to the idea of having this child and now it's been taken from her. It's important it's made clear that this is in no way her fault. She's going to need help, that is for sure, we can't see how this is going to go'

Christian ran his hand through his hair 'Caleb is on his way, I've had George drive him, he's not in any state to get behind a wheel… God… Jess… I don't have a clue what to do now or what to say…'

Ana touched his arm lightly 'we just need to make sure she's okay'.

It wasn't much later that Caleb arrived, looking fraught as he hurried into the room, where Jess was still looking blankly at the wall.

Christian could see through the crack in the door as Caleb walked in, though he couldn't hear anything they were saying. He saw Caleb say something and Jess nod in response as Caleb leant down slightly to say something directly to her face as she was looking pointedly away from him.

Jess barely responded and Caleb placed a hand on her hand, but Jess pulled her arm back, recoiling from the touch.

Christian felt the remains of his heart sink, feeling a flashback to how he was at that age, and felt sick that he'd let his own daughter get to that state.

Grace had made sure that Jess remained in the hospital for three days, making sure that her blood work and everything else was okay, and checking that medically she was doing alright.

There was no question that mentally Jess was pretty broken, after saying no more than a few words to Ana when she had first come in, no one had been able to get more than that out of her since, even a few words were hard to manage.

Jess had been kept away from Harry whilst she was still in the hospital, a Doctor and Grace had explained to Ana and Christian that she was in no state of mind to be looking after a child, and Harry would likely be scared by her cold, emotionless demeanour.

No one had missed the way that Jess recoiled or withdrew when anyone touched her, she was able to handle being touched but looked uncomfortable, twisting out of it as soon as possible.

Christian had tried to speak to her, Ana had, Caleb, Carrick, Grace, Elliot, Mia, Sawyer, George, Rose and even Taylor had tried to talk to her; but none of them had managed to garner any response from her. Jess had completely retreated into herself, but the nurses had told Grace that when Jess was left on her own, she would curl up on the bed and cry her eyes out.

After four days Christian and Ana finally took Jess back to Escala, driving in silence that was broken only by the radio which was playing between them all.

Back at the apartment Jess turned to them, her voice quiet 'where is Harry?'.

'He's with my parents, to give you a break for a few days so you can rest'.

Jess nodded slightly, looking grateful and Christian smiled kindly 'do you want a takeout, Chinese?'.

Jess managed a brief, weak smile and nodded 'yeah, thanks' before she sat down slowly on the sofa, looking exhausted.

Jess was still introverted and quiet though everyone seemed to think that she was slightly better, but Christian could see how false and forced everything was for his daughter, even making the most basic conversation was difficult for her.

A few days after she had returned to Escala Jess asked Ana to check on Harry for her, and she had dutifully driven over to the Grey House to check on her Grandson.

Christian had been in his study for two hours when he came out in to the main room, stopping dead at what he saw.

Jess was sat low in one of the sofas, a bottle of expensive wine lying empty on the glass table, the last remains dribbling out onto the glass to mingle with the remnants of food that was scattered all over the place.
In her hand was a large bottle of whiskey, that was over two thirds empty, and Christian recognized it from his drinks cabinet.

'What the hell are you doing Jess? You're on medication!'

Her eyes were dark and she looked annoyed 'leave me alone Christian'

He snatched the bottle out of her hand and slammed it on to the side table 'no- you are my daughter and I am not going to let you do this to yourself'

Jess was choked up as she stood up and shouted at Christian 'I am empty- I feel nothing, Christian- nothing. I'm not gonna apologise for trying to feel something'.

'You won't feel anything good if your looking in the bottom of a whiskey bottle'.
She rounded on him, tears in her eyes as she shouted 'I don't care what I feel anymore, as long as its something!'.

Christian faltered, recognising the same feelings he'd felt at her age, using alcohol and sex with Elena Lincoln to just feel something, to just feel anything.

'Jess, please, don't do this to yourself'

Christian watched as she balled her fists up and took a deep breath, evidently about to scream and shout at him again. Instead Jess faltered and her eyes filled up with tears, her voice cracking 'I lost my baby Dad, my baby'

Christian felt a lump in his throat and pulled her into a hug, holding her tightly as she cried into his chest 'It's no your fault Jess'

'I didn't want it, and now- now- it's my fault'

Christian pulled her back at arms length and looked her directly in the eyes 'no, it isn't. Nothing you could have done would have made any difference Jess, it was unavoidable, and you need to stop blaming yourself or you will end up as messed up as I am'

Please review and let me know what you thought x