If Ren was annoying as a general human being, he was simply insufferable as a parent – or whatever it was he and Hux were posing as.

"She's not comfortable like that," he was telling Hux while removing his boots.

Hux had barely had the time to crawl out of the cold water and put on his pants that he'd found himself holding Aurel while Ren disrobed right in front of him.

On their way back to the ship, Hux had spotted a stream and hadn't been able to resist the urge to stop for at least a quick bath. This was the first clear water they'd seen in weeks, and even Ren had agreed to stop by. Being filthy and smelly wasn't something either of them was used to.

"And what position would be most agreeable to her majesty?" Hux retorted, trying to adjust the baby's head against his chest. He wasn't really cut out for this.

Stripped to his undergarments, Ren approached and manoeuvered Hux's arms into the right position. He was basically naked, and Hux was troubled by how little it seemed to disturb Ren to be standing so close to another man with nothing but undershorts on. Certainly, it troubled Hux enough for the both of them.

Ren was massive. His chest was twice as large as Hux's (and possibly more) and rippling with taut muscles, just like his arms, and waist and... everything, really.

As a wave of heat rose from his belly, Hux pried himself away from Ren's touch and obtrusive presence. "Take your damn bath and let's go back to the ship. It's almost sunset. I don't want to be out after dark."

Ren stared. Despite the discomfort, Hux somehow noticed for the first time that Ren's eyes were, in fact, not hazel as he had so far believed, but green, with a halo of brown around the pupils.

How quaint, he thought, the discomfort slowly turning into a weird flutter behind his navel.

He tried not to watch Ren walk into the water. He sat down under a tree, instead, and just listened to the splashing sounds of Ren's body diving in the stream. Out of the corner of his eyes, he caught just a glimpse of contracted shoulderblades disappearing under the surface of the water.

"What a peacock," Hux muttered, then closed his eyes and let his head rest back against the trunk of the tree. Aurel burbled and he took it as a sign or agreement.

He craked an eye open. "I know, right? Obnoxious."

Aurel burbled again. Hux gently tapped a finger on her nose: "You're a smart kid, huh? You truly like me better than him?"

Silver shards surfaced into Aruel's dark irises and glittered in the pale late afternoon light.

"Oh." Hux's finger froze halfway down her soft cheek. "Well, that is unexpected."

"Who are you talking to?"

Hux's head snapped up: Ren had climbed out of the water and was walking towards him, casually combing a hand through his wet hair. The scar on his face was longer than Hux had imagined: it stretched down his neck and collarbone in a white, uneaven trail, a thin red core between its rough edges.

"Nobody."

Ren's gaze lowered to Aurel for a moment, then returned to Hux's face. "She's hungry again."

"Is she?" Hux couldn't see any difference in her hair. "We need to find some milk. Or something to feed to her."

Ren, dripping water all around himself, pursed his lips. "How do you intend to pay for any of those?"

"You can use your Force tricks," Hux retorted, waving a hand in Ren's direction. "Can you Force-convince a bird to fly straight into your hands?"

"Stop talking about the Force like it's a game."

"Do you have a better idea?"

x

Ren's silencer was way too small for two people, let alone two people (one of which was Ren's size) and a baby. Especially because, surprisingly enough, the baby was the one taking up most of the available room.

Daleel had given them a couple of proper baby clothes and some nappies – which neither Hux nor Ren had learned how to correctly place. Hux didn't even want to think about what they were going to do when it would be time to wash those things.

"What time is it?" he groaned from the floor. Ren, slouched in the pilot seat in the cockpit, was snoring soundly.

Hux let his head fall back to the wall and huffed. So much for cooperation.

"I'm going to kill him in his sleep," he said to Aurel, whose tiny fangs were happily dipped into his right wrist. It was a funny feeling. Hux had thought it would hurt, but after the first moment it just sort of tickled.

Babies needed a lot of meals, according to Karelia and Daleel, so Hux and Ren had been taking turns with nurisng Aurel every two hours. All night long. What had seemed like a viable option in the first place – cheap and easy – was now starting to get slightly impractical: neither Hux nor Ren had anticipated how much blood Aurel would be able to drain from them.

It was Hux's third round, now, and he was starting to feel a little dizzy. How could such a small creature be so hungry all the time?

A minute later, Aurel finally – finally – let go of him and retracted her canines.

Hux sighed in relief. "It was about time, little lady." He checked the two purple dots marking the tender flesh of his inner wrist: the twin holes were already fading; Aurel's saliva probably contained something with healing-accelerating properties. Which was a blessing, because Hux couldn't afford any futher blood loss. He felt weak and light-headed, but Aurel, at least, looked happy and satisfied.

Hux carefully wiped the red smudges from her pale lips and resettled her to prop her against his bent knees. She was impossibly small, soft and feather-like under his hands. He studied her intently: she was a delicate little thing – pretty, as far as he could judge – and her eyes, with those ever-changing silver specks, were mesmerising. Had anyone ever thought such a thing about him? Had anyone ever looked at baby Armitage and thought he was anything good?

Brendol Hux had never shown any love to him. Armitage had been his son and had taken his name just bacause they shared the same blood. Simple as that. Shallow as that. Despite how desperately he had wanted it, Hux had never felt like a son to Brendol. He had never been held the way he was now holding little Aurel. Nobody had ever talked to him in a low, sweet voice to sing him a lullaby.

With a pang in his heart, Hux suddenly realised that children could be orphans even with a name and a family.

No, he thought after a second, casting a brief look at Ren's slumbering figure. Not just children.

That much he knew about Ren: a foresaken child. A rejected child. Worthless to his family as much as Hux had been to his own.

Five tiny fingers closed around Hux's thumb and a wave of warmth washed over him out of nowhere. He almost smiled at her. "Welcome to the pity party, missy," he whispered, and the warmth around him intensified.

"What time is it?" asked a sleepy voice.

Hux looked up, feeling inexplicably guilty. Ren was rubbing his face between his hands, the first light of dawn rising from the mountains behind him.

"I asked you the same question moments ago, but you were too busy snoring to consider me."

Giving no sign of having heard anything Hux had just said, Ren stood from his seat and walked to him with a shadow concern on his face. He looked very tired, with blue shades under his eyes and a greyish undertone to his white complexion.

"Give her here," he said, holding his arms out. "You look terrible, you need some sleep."

Hux arched a brow. "Look who's talking! You look worse than Snoke after you killed him."

Ren's arms retreated slowly. He towered over Hux, a hundred questions flashing through his eyes. It seemed to take forever to him to finally say: "You know."

Hux made a face. He hadn't meant to blurt that out like that – he hadn't meant to blurt it out at all. But that didn't really matter, now. Not anymore. "Of course I know! Why did you think I was about to kill you back in that bloody throne room?"

"I guessed it was just because you hated me."

"Yes, well," Hux reached out to accept the hand Ren was offering and let him pull him up. "That was one of the other reasons."

Ren took Aurel without taking his eyes from Hux's. He clearly hadn't expected Hux to be so transparent about his intentions that night. The fragile balance they had miracolously managed to maintain so far was now threatening to tip.

"Don't look at me like that," said Hux tiredly. "I'm not going to kill you. Snoke is dead, the First Oder is dead, and so are my aspirations. You and I depend on each other to survive, now. Let's make this work."

"You mean until we have enough money to part ways and disappear forever."

Hux frowned, straightening his back. "Of course. That's what I mean."

Ren nodded. He was absently stroking Aurel's head with a thumb; his hand was large enough he could nestle Aurel's whole body into it.

Hux refused to look him in the eye. He felt... bewildered. This was not the man he knew. There was a tenderness in that gesture – a humanity Hux had never seen before. Not in Kylo Ren.

"If you're alright with her," he said, turning away. "I'll try to rest before Karelia comes to check the ship."

Understandably, Karelia had demanded to see the silencer before starting to look for buyers. She had also demanded, also understandably, half of the profits for herself and Daleel – a condition both Hux and Ren had accepted immediately, since the job was risky and they wouldn't be able to fulfil it without the two women's help.

When Hux finally slumped down into the pilot seat, he felt like he had aged ten year overnight. His bones and joints pulsed with a dull ache, his whole body sore from too many nights spent sleeping on the ground. Even Ren's seat was uncomfortable, but still better than the cold, hard floor.

Hux gradually drifted into sleep, rocked by his own exaustion and by the distant echo of a lullaby hummed in the break of daylight.

x

Karelia showed up midmorning, riding a gualaar that looked just as dangerous as she did. Hux instinctively stepped back when he saw her dismount with a confident jump. He could swear the massive beast was glaring at him.

"Don't be afraid of Rowdy," said Karelia with a wink. "He's a good boy. A little lethal, if you piss him off, but a softie inside. Right, darling?"

The gaulaar huffed loudly and rubbed his giant muzzle against his mistress' shoulder. Karelia returned the affection with a couple of pats on the side of the animal's neck. "See? Mama's good boy."

"Keep that thing away from us," Hux warned, stepping behind Ren with Aruel clutched to his chest. If that beast decided to eat their most valuable possession, it would be the end of all their hopes.

Karelia gave him an infuriatingly knowing look and muttered something to the gualaar, who stood perfectly still as she approached the ship. It was official: Hux now had a new least favurite person.

"This beauty is very well kept," Karelia said, after circling Ren's silencer for the second time. "If you had more time, I could– "

"We don't have more time," Ren cut in. He was jittery: he wasn't keen on the idea of giving up his ship, but he had no other choice. He and Hux would soon be found it they continued using such a noticeable transportation. Plus, they desperately needed money.

"Fence this rubbish as soon as you can, as best as you can," Hux added. "We only deal in cash. If I have to spill one more blood drop to feed Aurel, I swear I'll pass out."

Karelia stopped in the middle of her examination of the silencer's bodywork to blink at Hux: "You gave her your own blood?"

Hux blinked back and turned to Ren, then back at Karelia: "Isn't that what we were supposed to do?"

The woman shrugged. "Feeding your own blood to your baby is the exact Damantine equivalent to human breastfeeding. I didn't peg either of you as the breastfeeding type."

Hux knew his ears were going red. He knew that, and he hated himself for that, because he didn't want to give that insufferable woman the satisfaction of seeing him blush like a pansy.

Hux wanted to reply with some snarky comment he would positively regret, but a soothing touch in his mind made him refrain himself.

Hux. It was Ren's voice. It was flowing in his head like fresh water, washing away his anger and frustration. Calm down. We need her help.

Then, outside Hux's head, Ren's voice added: "She's just saying that it's what establishes the bond between the baby and the parent, and we probably didn't look ready for that." He met Karelia's eyes and she let out a snicker.

"That's an understatement, buddy." Karelia approached Hux and Ren with a scary glint in her eyes. "You're going to have to learn to actually care for that kid if you really want to pass as loving dads."

Hux faltered. Was Karelia insinuating they were a fraud? They made a perfect family picture. How dare she?

Ren glared at her with an outraged frown: "It's new to us. You're right: we have no idea what we're doing. She's only been with us for a few days." He turned to Aurel, and Hux thought the affection in his look was impressively convincing, so much Hux almost believed him.

"We'll learn," he said breahlessly. He searched Ren's face and received a nod of reassurance.

"We will," Ren agreed. He was stiff, his whole body as tense as a bowstring. If Karelia suspected they were hiding something from here, they were in trouble. Big, big trouble.

In confirmation of Hux's fears, Karelia put her hands on her hips and shook her head disappointedly. "Look, guys: I'm playing along with your little lovebirds charade, here, but I'm not a fool. You two are not in love. If there's any mutual feeling between the two of you, that's barely tolerance."

Hux was ready to kill her, if he must. He considered her bare throat, tender and easy to slash with a simple knife as the one he had hidden in his boot. His fingers flexed, preparing to reach down, but something stopped him. It wasn't Ren's touch, this time; it was the memory of Daleel's kind smile, and Kahli and Bejen's laughter filling the house.

Hux shifted Aurel against his chest and cursed himself. What's wrong with me?

But Karelia wasn't done: "Don't worry," she helpdup a finger before either of them could argue. "It's none of my business if you and he are lovers or murderes or whatever, and I frankly don't give a damn. Just take this piece of advice from a friend: if you want to pretend to be a happy married couple, you're going to have to put a little more effort into it."

So maybe she wasn't entirely wrong. Hux and Ren weren't exactly warm to one another, but that didn't mean anything. Not all couples were cheesy romantic clichés. Hux opened his mouth to deny, to display all the indignation he was capable of, but Ren put a hand on his arm and said, instead: "We appreciate the feedback."

Hux was flabbergasted: Ren had just blown their cover, just like that. To a perfect stranger.

Aurel whined against Hux's shoulder and he bounced her with gentle pats her back.

Karelia watched the scene with yet another irritating little grin. "Awful boyfriends," she commented. "Not so bad as parents, though."

"Oh, shut up!" Hux snapped, turning Aurel away from the woman's patronising look. "You know we're not her parents."

Karelia addressed him one of her terrifying shark-like smiles: "I said you're not lovers," she clarified with the tone of an adult trying to reason with a toddler. "That doesn't automatically rule you out as parents."

"Please! You know we're lying and your father was a slaver. You must know what we were planning to do with her."

The shark-smile widened. "I do indeed."

Hux hated her. Her mere presence made him want to throw himself off a cliff. Ren, however, seemed to like her. Like her, as in enjoy her. He averted the conversation to the ship and allowed Hux to get away with Aurel while they discussed business.

Aurel was very intrigued by Karelia's beast – what was his name? – and the animal seemed to intercept her interest, because he looked up and, to Hux's horror, abandoned his spot to trot towards them like he had been called.

"Did you do this?" Hux asked Aurel, half stunned, half admired. "Did you just– " The gaulaar's wet snout nudged Hux's hand over Aurel's back. The baby uttered something surprisingly similar to a giggle. Hux felt that absurd warmth all around himself again.

When Karelia finally left, with a promise she would find a good buyer very soon, Hux watched her and her ride disappear among the trees with such relief he deflated like a baloon.

"Why did she look so smug?" he asked Ren, following back into the silencer.

Ren stopped halfway along the ramp. He turned to Hux and gave him a long, sullen look.

"You said she must know what we were going to do with Aurel."

Hux huffed impatiently. "So?"

Ren's eyes were dark and glossy behind a curtain of black locks. Hux felt like he was being searched within.

"Were. Past tense."

Oh.

Oh.

Notes:

I swear, I have no idea how this story is getting so long. I started out as a one-shot idea, something clearly went wrong. I'm not satisfied with this chapter, but I couldn't linger on it any longer or I would never update. Take it as it is, and sorry for the usual typos. Reviews are welcome. Seriously, literally they fuel inspiration.