I struggled with this chapter. Reviews are really appreciated.
The days were being counted down.
Two and a half weeks passed since Matt blew up over Facebook. Of course, Matt's Facebook page had been removed, much to Dave's and Matt's chagrin. Neither boy wanted it to happen, but they had no choice. Homophobia was, after all, homophobia.
Matt's parents turned out knowing they had a gay son well before Matt even knew. This is often the case, isn't it? Every gay person thinks they're fooling the world, only to have that come crashing down around them. Matt's parents welcomed their new gay son into their world and wanted to meet Dave. However, they told Matt they weren't ready for Dave to come to dinner. Matt didn't understand the difference, but was grateful nonetheless. Dave was ecstatic for him. And, for them.
But now, Dave stood in the locker room after the second of a two-a-day football practice. School was starting the following Monday and the football team was in a state of disarray – some were in pain, others were in towels after a shower, and still others were laughing, being ornery teenage boys.
But Dave had a pensive look on his face. Azimio couldn't help but notice.
"Sup." Azimio said, sitting beside Dave. Azimio was finishing tying on his shoes. Dave was already dressed.
"Sup." Dave mechanically replied.
Silence.
Neither boy said anything. Dave's head was slightly bowed towards the open door of his red locker. Azimio blinked a few times and suddenly snapped his fingers in Dave's direction. Dave jumped and glared at Azimio. Azimio simply smiled.
"Sweatin' school?" Azimio casually asked.
"Not really." Dave simply answered.
More silence.
Azimio and Dave had been friends since middle school. Azimio could read him pretty well by this point and knew something was troubling his best friend. Or, he thought he could read him.
"What's up, Dave?" Azimio asked, concerned.
Dave didn't answer nor did he look at him. Dave's thoughts were on many things in that second or two before he answered – Matt, his Dad, upcoming school, faking dates with girls and Matt knowing, Azimio, and finally, just Matt.
"Nothin'."
"Bullshit, nothin'."
"I gotta go, Az."
And with that, Dave left, Azimio looking after him, shaking his head a little, brows furrowed.
.
"Dad?"
Paul Karofsky looked up from his desk in his office. The office was a typical coach's office – three-ring binders all over the place, a computer monitor on the desk, a trophy or two mounted prominently. Institutional windows with standard horizontal white blinds adorned the walls. The office was white, which was the other school's color. That was convenient.
"Yeah?" Paul answered, returning to his office work.
"You comin' home late?" Dave hesitantly asked.
"Why? You got a date?" Paul answered, without looking up.
Dave thought for half a second. This was tempting. Dave, in fact, did have a date with Matt that night. Matt was going to come over and they were going to a small, intimate restaurant in nearby Findlay. Of course, teenagers being teenagers, they wouldn't only be eating.
"N-no," Dave began, "I just want to know if I should start dinner or not."
"Do what you want." Paul curtly answered.
Dave frowned and left.
.
"Dave, you can't expect this to be your fault." Matt said. He and Dave were at a nice restaurant in Findlay. The boys were eating a seafood and pasta dish. It was still early on a Wednesday evening and not very may patrons were there.
"Well, I just can't help that when my parents divorced, Dad stopped talking to me. And hanging out with me. And talking with me. And…."
Matt started to reach for Dave's hand, hesitated, and placed it on Dave's thigh instead, under the tablecloth.
"No. Absolutely not." Matt gently began. "Whatever is going on with your Dad, it has nothing to do with you. Your parents made choices. You did not."
"Easier said than believed, Matt." Dave replied sadly.
Matt sighed. There was no getting through to Dave when he was like this. When a teenager thinks something is his fault, it generally is. However, in this situation, this wasn't the case. Good luck getting David Karofsky to believe that.
Dave looked at Matt sympathetically.
"Look," Dave said, "I know you're trying to cheer me up-"
"No, I'm not." Matt said resolutely, "I'm trying to get you to see reason. Isn't that what that big, mathematicy brain of yours is supposed to do?" Matt finished a little teasingly.
Dave couldn't help but give a little eye roll, along with a half-smile.
The boys resumed eating their pasta dishes. Occasionally, Matt would look around the room a little, eying a wall hanging or chandelier, only to return looking back at Dave and realize that Dave was gazing at him, with a little smile on his face. Embarrassed, Matt would look down at his plate and resume eating. Then, the boys' roles would reverse – Dave would be looking around and, then he'd feel a slight bump to his knee. He'd look at Matt, only to see a devilish look in Matt's eyes.
Matt's blue eyes would then travel along Dave's throat, meaty pecs and thick arms, and then back to Dave's hazel eyes.
Dave, of course, had to follow suit. His eyes would hungrily roam over Matt's thin jaw line, along his slim throat, resting on his narrow but strong shoulders, and quite suddenly back to Matt.
The boys did this playful flirting until it became too much.
They left soon after that. They didn't go home right away.
.
Dave re-entered his house about fifteen minutes before curfew. Paul was sitting in a rocker, watching TV. Upon seeing Dave enter the house, Paul's cold, brown eyes eyed Dave carefully.
Dave noticed his Dad, said a few pleasantries, and made a dash through the living room towards the staircase up to his bedroom. Just as he hit the staircase, he heard his father call out.
"If you get a girl pregnant, you're paying for the abortion."
Oh, if you only knew, Dad.
.
First day of school. Dave and Matt pulled into the student parking lot separately. They had a routine down – they would text throughout the day, maybe steal occasional glances each other's way, and hang out after school when they could. Weekends were theirs, unless otherwise noted. Finding time in autumn would be difficult – Matt had glee after school and Dave often had football practice.
Neither boy was ready to come out to the school. Especially Dave. Both boys had a lot to lose by coming out, but Dave's case could be pleaded more.
So, both boys were near each other, casually walking towards the school entrance. Of course, they noticed one another. They texted each other as soon as they arrived. They were walking about twenty feet apart from each other, very slowly coming closer and closer. Dave was really concerned that he wouldn't be able to keep his eyes off Matt's long, long body.
Of course, Matt knew what Dave was thinking. He toyed with Dave, walking a little faster, with just a little bit of a wiggle in his walk. Matt could've sworn he heard a strangled snarl from behind him, but he wasn't sure.
Homeroom. First period. Second period. Finally, third period. Third period world history was their only subject together. Dave arrived before Matt did, sitting with the other jocks. Soon, Matt appeared, crossed the room, and sat near the window.
One of the jocks sneered a little at Matt, which led to giggles from every jock except Dave. Dave just frowned, looking away. He knew Matt didn't deserve this treatment. A quiet, yet contained fury erupted in Dave's head.
But Matt took it better than Dave would've thought. The whole Facebook debacle just let the school know that Matt might be gay. Dave would be safe from that accusation.
"Hey homo!" one of the jocks announced, towards Matt.
Matt ignored him.
"Homo!" But this time, it was Azimio that stood up.
Finally, Matt casually turned his head towards Azimio. Azimio fired a huge wet paper wad, smacking Matt in the shoulder.
Azimio nearly fell back into his seat with laughter, chorused by the other jocks. Dave just frowned even more.
But Matt simply flicked off the wet notebook paper from his shoulder and winked at Azimio, which led to even more raucous laughter. The teacher decided to make an appearance right then. Students, who were watching what happened, just stared at Matt. Matt had pretty much outed himself.
Dave looked further away.
.
When world history class ended, Dave was surprised to get a text from Matt. The text simply read, "U OK?" Astonished, Dave replied, "Yea. U?" Matt took a while to answer, which worried Dave. Of course, Dave still wasn't looking at Matt even as most students had already left the room. His cell phone buzzed and he opened it up to read a new text.
"Look at me"
Dave finished reading that text and looked over at Matt. Matt was standing up, satchel over his right shoulder. The sunlight was behind Matt, which made his blonde hair shine even more. His blue eyes sparkled, and his wide smile gradually faded.
"That which doesn't kill us….." Matt said quietly, with a half smile.
Dave just looked at him. Dave was torn. He wanted to run up to Matt and shield him from the world. He also wanted to tear his eyes away and run the hell out of the room.
His hesitancy must've shown because Matt simply shrugged and walked out of the classroom without a second glance at Dave.
Shamefully, Dave looked at his most recent text from Matt – "look at me." He gently rubbed his index finger over the words, as if they could caress back. Dave had to fight back a tear of frustration and sadness.
If there was ever a time to talk to Matt, this was it. But he couldn't.
So, Dave sighed, got up, and left for fourth period.
.
At the end of the school day, Matt strolled into the choir room for glee rehearsal. Some students were returning from last year, but a few new faces appeared. One student he didn't recognize at all. But something about this new kid tantalized Matt.
This kid had a sense of style – he wore cute little sunglasses, dipped below his eyes to show bright blue eyes. He had dark blonde hair and a dashing smile. He had the same build as Matt and something about this kid told Matt that he would immediately like him. He dressed meticulously too, something which was very rare for McKinley High School.
That was, until, they made eye contact. Something passed between them – a little…hostility? Jealousy? Whatever it was, it made Matt feel uncomfortable. The new kid smirked.
Matt took his seat in the usual front row. He noticed this new, cute kid take a seat on the other side of the room. Matt couldn't help but feel stares. But when he turned, only the new kid was looking at him, abruptly smiling.
"Alright, class!" Mr. Shuester enthusiastically began, "A new year means a new year to defend our Regional trophy. But, that all starts with Sectionals in a few months."
Around the choir room, a few cheers went up along with a few groans. Whenever Mr. Shuester made statements like this, that meant rehearsal after rehearsal after rehearsal. Normally, Matt didn't mind, but when he got a routine down, which usually happened pretty quickly, he had to go on autopilot mode during rehearsals.
"I see a few new faces here." Mr. Shuester announced, "You have to audition for glee club here at McKinley. Which one of you would like to go first?"
"I will." The cute new kid said. Matt made a quick mental note of his voice and body language. Cocky, confident, and very cute. Something churned in Matt's stomach.
"Alright." Mr. Shuester began, "what's your name?"
"Sebastian Smythe. I just transferred here from…New York." Sebastian replied. Some of the club mouthed sounds of being impressed, but Matt narrowed his eyes. This Sebastian was up to something and Matt didn't like it.
"OK, Sebastian, do you have a song prepared?" Mr. Shuester politely asked.
"I always do." Sebastian replied smugly. Matt quietly scoffed.
"Well, then, let's hear it."
And with that, Mr. Shuester turned towards the piano and sat down.
"Hi, I'm Sebastian Smythe and I'll be singing Cold by Evans Blue."
Matt nodded at the song choice, impressed. Sebastian turned around and walked a few steps towards the whiteboard. Then, suddenly, he turned around towards the club.
"A Capella." Sebastian added, too smugly.
Matt rolled his eyes.
.