All Tomorrows Parties
"What's next Scamp?" Margaret grinned as Sam's adorable face scrunched up in concentration as he attempted to read the shopping list clutched in his hand whilst trying to manoeuvre his mini shopping trolley around a corner isle. He was determined to finish this operation on his own thank you very much. Sam, ever the keen and eager solider, had been dying to help with the party Margaret had offered to throw to celebrate Charles and Molly's engagement. Charles, taking advantage of his son's willingness to actually do some work, had put Sam in charge of scoff duty for "The Mini Platoon," a name given to Sam and the rest of Molly's siblings by Two Section whenever they were all together. Sam, taking the job extremely seriously, had liaised with Molly and even Belinda via Skype so he could get the Dawes' food preferences and check for any intolerances or allergies before he wrote his shopping list. Molly had certainly trained him well. He was a mini medic in the making these days.
"Ummm we've got the mini burgers, chips and pizzas. The sausage rolls are in the next isle over and then we need to go back to the fruit and veg to get the carrots, celery and cucumber for the dips. Ohhh and Jessie likes peanut butter with her snacks so we might gunna need some of that." Sam checked off the items on his list and peered into his trolley to check he hadn't missed anything. "After that, I need nibbles just like you Grandma, before we hit the drinks isle." Margaret raised an eyebrow in amusement at her grandson's strategic planning. Like father like son, Sam had everything planned to a T and treated the shopping trip as his dad would a military operation. "Well we'd better get a move on then. The lads are due in on the 7.30 train and the Dawes clan are due at ours in an hour." Margaret watched as Sam's face lit up at the mention of the impending arrival of Two Section. "Are they all coming? Do you think Kinders will bring his camera so we can see the Safari photos? I really want to see the video of Fingers' chasing those monkeys after they stole his hat from the jeep." Margaret laughed at the animated expression on Sam's face. "I'm sure if you ask him nicely he'll show you. But back to the job at hand my little soldier. We have a platoon to feed and we're on a tight deadline if we want to get back in time. How about a game of Supermarket Sweep to speed things up. Drinks and snack isles only."
"I know Grandma. How long do we have this time do you reckon?" Sam glanced down at his watch and set his stop watch ready. There was a lot at stake here. The last several times they'd played Margaret had been victorious, slowly closing the gap on Sam's early lead. The score was currently 4-3 to Sam. "Right Scamp. Lets say 10 minutes? Yes that's plenty. 10 minutes to get our snacks then we'll meet at checkout number 4 alright?" Margaret eyed Sam who nodded in confirmation. Maybe, if she was quick she could sneak across to the wine isle and add a few extra bottles of wine. She had a feeling she was going to need them tonight.
"Got it Grandma! 10 minutes, checkout 4. Can we go now?" Sam was practically bouncing as he gripped the trolley's handle with impatience. "Don't panic Sam. It's only a bit of healthy competition. Bonus points if we keep the food on the shelves and double points for any buy one get one free offers." Margaret couldn't help but wink at she drew her trolley level with Sam's.
"Yeah you won't be saying that when I win Grandma."
"Cheeky! Ok are you ready?" Sam nodded and focused his eyes forward. "On your marks. Get set. GO!" With that, both dashed off towards the snacks isle, completely oblivious to the disapproving looks from the other customers as various packets of crisps, nibbles and snacks came flying off the shelves as they dashed past. Shit that's four points down already. Margaret glanced over at Sam's loud giggles as he weaved skilfully in and out of the other shoppers. She couldn't help but laugh as he also dropped several bags on the floor. Ha! Now they were even! As Sam disappeared around the corner towards the checkouts with Margaret close at his heels, she knew it was going to be a very close race indeed.
Margaret sat on the patio steps and watched as members of the Dawes and James family mingled and chatted over drinks. Most of the family members had arrived, they were now just waiting for Two Section. Margaret had a sneaking suspicion that once they had arrived, the real fun and games would begin. When she had first broached the idea of hosting the engagement party she had been unsure about how Molly's family would take the idea. She had been afraid it would look like she was trying to take over. The last thing Margaret had wanted was for Molly's family to feel uncomfortable, or think that she felt she'd be able to do a better job than they could. Nan, never one to mince her words, had declared that Margaret was welcome to throw a good old knees up as they 'couldn't plan a piss up in a brewery." She'd also secretly confided in Margaret that having the party in Bath meant that it was highly likely Dave would be more inclined to actually make an effort and put some bloody pants on. What with Bath being 'well posh and that.' Speak of the devil. Nan appeared and handed Margaret a glass of wine. "'Ear, get that down ya."
"Thanks."
They sat in comfortable silence as they watched the kids run around the garden as they dodged in and out of the marque as they engaged in an intense game of warfare with nerf darts. The two women watched as Jessie, Molly's younger sister, took aim and shot too darts in Sam's direction. Both missed their target, accidently flying towards Eleanor's wineglass, sending red wine spilling on to her new, and undoubtable expensive, cream silk dress. Both women held their breath as the kids paused and looked at her in horror as she sprang to her feet with a shriek. Margaret smirked in satisfaction. Serves her right the snooty cow. Margaret and Richard's sister had never seen eye to eye. Eleanor had always looked down her nose at Margaret, never believing she was good enough for Richard. She had adopted the same disapproving attitude with Molly when they had been first introduced. She had been highly affronted when she had learnt that Charles and Rebecca were to divorce as she had thought they were a match made in society heaven. Margaret was beginning to regret inviting her in the first place.
"Ay up, looks like Cruella de Vil is about to blow up at our Jessie. She's got a face like a slapped arse. Did her mother never tell 'er that if her face stays like that an' the wind changes she'll be stuck lookin like a constipated chicken for the rest of 'er miserable life? Who wears white to an outdoor party anyhow? Who does she think she is Princess Grace of Monaco?" Margaret sniggered at Nan's insults. She could see know where Molly got her sharp tongue and quick wit from. "Well if her face does change, it'll be a marked improvement I'm sure. Come on. Looks like the kids might need a bit of back up. Sam's been taking Karate lessons. I wouldn't put it past him to start practising his moves on her for insulting Jessie. You know how protective they are of each other." Sensing trouble brewing the two women made their way over to the Mini Platoon who had formed a protective circle around Jessie with Sam at the front his arms folded as he glared at Eleanor.
"Ahh Eleanor you're looking as young as ever. I was just telling Molly's Nan you don't look a day over 65." From the corner of her eye she could see Eleanor's affronted look. She'd celebrated her 60th just last year. "Yes well, I see you've pulled out all the stops as usual. It's a shame about some of the company you're keeping these days though."
"Ahh it was nothing really. Though it's still quite wonderful how you still have a knack for seeing improvement wherever you look. I never knew you had such reforming zeal."
"I take that as a compliment Margaret." Margaret saw Nan raise an eyebrow.
"Really? Oh dear I must have said it wrong then. Now please be a dear and leave the kids alone. They're only having a bit of fun. You might want to try it sometime. Heaven knows you might even enjoy yourself. Not that we'd be able to notice with your face. Tell me who is your doctor these days? I'd think about getting a refund if I were you." Nan sniggered as the kids looked wide eyed back and forth between the two adults as if watching a riveting tennis match.
"Well I always knew you never had any manners Margaret. I'd have expected better from you." Margaret gritted her teeth and smiled sweetly. You must not slap your sister in law Margaret.
Never one to keep quiet Nan piped up, "Show a bit of respect lady. Margaret's a better person that you'll ever be. Make no mistake. If ya insult her or one of my family again, I'll have ya blowing smoke out your arse before you can say La De Da!" Margaret let Nan's words sink in, before she added some of her own. "Eleanor you're family. I can't change that. But so help me if you cause a scene or do anything to ruin this party I won't hesitate to get Richard to throw you out. Sister or not. Do I make myself clear?" Throwing Jessie a last scathing look Eleanor turned and marched back towards the house no doubt in search of something to clean her dress with. Hearing Nan's low whistle Margaret turned to look at her. "Well I thought our family was crazy. It's nice to see you lot aren't as perfect as you appear. Though remind me never ta get on the wrong side of ya. You've got quite an arsenal of insults up your sleeve ain't ya. You dark horse you. I'll definitely drink to that." Margaret laughed. "I've been wanting to say that for years. I think the wines starting to go to my head." Catching the uncertain look Jessie sent her gave her a reassuring wink. "Don't worry about it sweetheart no harm done." Giving a relieved smile Jessie let the kids coax her away and back into the game.
"Oh watch out, troubles about." Nan nodded her head to the side where Two Section were making their way out of the house scanning the crowd. Spotting the two women they made their way over. "Alright Mrs J, lookin' as lovely as ever I see. Did I mention I'm still single?" Fingers joked as he waggled his eyebrows playfully as he lent forward to kiss Margaret's cheek in greeting. With an embarrassed chuckle she hit his arm playfully. "Oh get away with you, you old charmer."
"What can I say, I know a lovely looking woman when I see one. You know you won't be able to resist my charm and good looks forever. I know I'm beautiful me." Kinders shook his head at Fingers as he released Nan and came to greet Margaret. "Yeh beautiful on the inside maybe Fingers. You sure you weren't hit with the ugly stick at birth? It would explain a lot." The other lads burst out laughing at Kinder's comment. "Ohhhhh proper rinsed ay Fingers." Baz Vegas called out as Mansfield sent Margaret a wink. "Honestly boys. You're no better than a bunch of teenagers. Will you ever grow up?" She asked sending them an exasperated look as she fought not to smile at their cheeky looks.
"Ah admit it Mrs James. You wouldn't have us any other way. You love us just as we are. Ain't that right Nan?" Brains called out good naturedly, wrapping an arm around Nan's shoulders. She looked him up and downs before relying sarcastically, "Well I could do without the honk you lot make in the mornin's. Not to mention your farts are enough to make me eyes bleed. God knows how our Molls put up with you lot for 6 months on tour." Margaret laughed as the boys grinned at each other, perfectly used to Nan's sense of humour by now. "Right lads Charles and Molly are milling about somewhere. Last I saw they were doing shots with Jackie and some of Charles' old friends from Sandhurst so God knows what state they're in. They look like they could drink for England so you've got quite a bit of catching up to do." The boys gave a cheer as they started towards the Marque. Margaret watched them go but couldn't resist calling them back. "Oh and lads?" the boys stopped and looked at Margaret curiously. "If you feel so inclined please try and use the bathrooms and not my best vase to relieve yourselves this time alright? Molly spent ages growing those roses, it would be a shame if they were to die so soon." She shot a look in Mansfield and Brain's direction, the two having the grace to look embarrassed. "Yes Ma'am!" with a final salute the boys turned and marched off across the garden. Oh there was never a dull moment when the lads were around. She grinned at the thought of what mischief they might concoct tonight.
Margaret chuckled as she sat on the porch swing, as she watched everyone around her continue to enjoy themselves. With the party beginning to wind down, most of the family and friends had left, leaving just the Dawes clan, Jackie, Two Section and a few others behind. The lads, having lost the last round of drinking games, were currently sporting various items of fancy dress clothes and face paint thanks to Molly's now sleeping siblings. Mansfield, wearing a Tutu and tiara, was stood giggling next to Baz Vegas, who looked equally as lovely wrapped in old net curtains made to look like a wedding dress, as they used Molly's make up to give both Dave and Finders a makeover whilst they slept. The boys had pulled their chairs together and were carefully trying to place Fingers' head on Dave's chest as Belinda was stood with a camera. As Dave shifted in his sleep, his arm had come down around Fingers' shoulders and he pulled him into an embrace as he slept on, oblivious to the mischief going on around him. Belinda stood sniggering as she filmed Nude Nut drawing a penis on Dave's face in pen to finish off the look. It matched perfectly with the bright green and blue eye shadow, the clip on dangly earring and fake moustache they had given him at the start. It amazed Margaret how Dave had managed to sleep through it.
Dangle Berries, who hand managed to plug in an iPod to the speakers, was stood on a table with Jackie, Kinders and Katie, attempting to sing Good Golly Miss Molly in tune. Margaret looked on in amusement as Charles wrapped a feather boa around Molly's next and used it to pull her closer as he tried to teach her how to dance. Molly was giggling madly as Charles spun her around in circles, the beret and star shaped glasses he wore, slipping down his face as he spun her around in circles, both stumbling to find their feet as they allowed Jackie and Kinders to pull them up onto the table where they continued to sing along to the music as loud as they could. The lads pulled Molly into a hug as Katie placed a multi coloured wig on Molly's head.
Margaret was relieved to see that the boy's sense of fun and good humour had not been drowned out and lost amongst the noise of war. They'd experienced so much together as a group, it was hard to believe that the majority of Two Section were still under thirty. You only had to look at them interact with each other to see that the bond they all shared was unique. Margaret knew it was rare to find a platoon that remained so close after so long. They'd gone beyond being just a bunch of work mates. They had become more like a family. They were always there for each other, supporting each other at their best and worst times. Although they often took the pissed and acted like a much of excited school kids, Margaret knew that the members of Two Section would walk over fire for each other if it came down to it. They remained as fiercely loyal and protective of each other now as they'd ever been.
Margaret was drawn from her musings by Richard's loud laughter as he and Nan started shimmying, swinging and twirling around as they replicated moves Margaret hadn't see Richard attempt since the seventies. Even then he had been uncoordinated and had dropped Margaret onto her arse. She only hoped Nan had more luck. When the song changed to Mr Bright Side by the Killers everyone gave a cheer and started jumping and throwing their arms in the air as they sang along as a group. Nan and Richard retreated over to Margaret. Maybe it was time to leave the dancing to the cool kids. Mansfield handed both Molly and Charles a glass and the crowd started chanting for them to down it. Molly sent Charles an uncertain look as she stared dubiously at the glass in her hand. Knowing the vast amount of alcohol they had brought, God only knows what was in it. With a slight shrug Molly's gaze met Charles' the challenge evident. "On three Dawes?"
"On three Bossman. Ready 1,2, 3." As they started to drink the lads and Jackie started cheering as Katie shook her head in disbelief. When they both finished they had identical looks of disgust on their faces. "Shittin 'ell boys. That was well rank." Molly declared as she downed a shot to try and drown out the taste. Charles started laughing as he tried to coax the boys to try it. They stared jostling one another as they tried to escape so nobody noticed as the table gave a groan in protest before collapsing sending everyone, and their drinks, tumbling to the ground in a heap. Margaret, Nan and Richard rushed over to check they were all alright. Thank fuck for plastic glasses. The group of soldiers remained in a heap, too stunned to move. With a groan Charles called out "I think I might gunna need a medic." Dangles called out,
"You ain't the only one Boss. Fancy givin' us the once over Molls? Jacks? I do love a medic me." Molly, tangled underneath Mansfield and Brains, attempted to flip Dangles to bird but was unable to as her arm was trapped under Mansfield's chest. "Ahh shit Brains your knees digging into me back." As she sat up she noticed she still held her empty glass. "Well that were a waste fine alcohol." The lads laughed as they set about trying to untangle themselves. Jackie reached down and helped Molly to her feet. "Looks like I was right about you ay Molly Dawes." At Molly's raised eyebrow Jackie continued, "Trouble seems to follow you everywhere you go." With a laugh Molly turned to Nan who was watched the scene in amusement. "Well Molls. That gives a whole new meaning to the game Twister don't it." Margaret laughed as she watched Charles and Mansfield try to stand only to fall back down in the fit of giggles. Oh dear that concoction had clearly gone to Charles head. It was like watching Bambi try to walk for the first time.
"Right lads, ladies. I think it might be time to call it a night don't you. Before someone really does need a medic." A few of the lads stared to protest but as they turned to survey the damage done to the garden they all agreed calling it a night might be a good idea. "Well lads it looks like you're all going to be on latrine clean nice and early tomorrow doesn't it." Margaret muttered cheerfully as everyone groaned. "Now which one of you gents are sober enough to help me put this one to bed." Kinders laughed as he and Baz Vegas moved forward to haul Charles to his feet.
"Up we go Bossman. Time for bed." Charles shook his head and sent a stern look at Kinders. "I hate to break it to you Kinders but I don't swing that way. You'll just have to share with Nude Nut and Baz I'm afraid." Margaret and Nan doubled over at the look of sheer horror on Kinders' face. Bless the man. The last thing he expected was to be propositioned by his ex-boss at his engagement party no less. Still chuckling, Margaret led the lads through the house with Charles stumbling between them as they tried to get him up the stairs. Molly, Jackie and Katie followed behind giggling as Richard was left the daunting task of trying to wake both Dave and Fingers. 'Ear Margaret are you sure this is a good idea. Ain't it like three flights? Couldn't we just leave him on the landing outside the bog?" Margaret laughed at her suggestion. "Well if he snores like he normally does when he' s drunk, no doubt Molly will kick him out onto the landing."
"Too right!" Molly called from the bottom of the stairs as the girls dissolved into giggles again. At the mention of Molly's name Charles broke into a rather enthusiastic rendition of Good Golly Miss Molly, though in his inebriated state, he couldn't remember all the words so ended up repeating the same line over and over again. "Oh for heaven sakes Charles! You'd think after being in the Army so long you'd be able to hold you're drink but noooo. Ladies and Gentleman my son Captain James the Lightweight." Kinders couldn't help but snigger at that as they finally manoeuvred him into his room. "Ohhh I like that one Mrs J. Can we use it on him when he's sober? I think it's much better than Captain Stern Face."
"Be my guest love." Depositing Charles on the bed the lads moved out of the way to give Margaret and Nan room to wrestle Charles out of his shoes and socks. The lads couldn't help but snigger as they watched Charles attempt to undo his buttons in his uncoordinated state. Giving up Charles clambered unsteadily to his feet and started towards his wardrobe. Staring at Nan with a raised eyebrow Margaret watched her son in fascination as Charles started to climb into his wardrobe, completely oblivious the rails of clothes in his way.
"Umm Charlie Boy whatcha doin' mate?" Looking over his shoulder Charles grinned at Nan.
"I'm going to the bathroom, I really need to pee." Margaret looked to the ceiling in exasperation as the lads fought to hold in their giggles. "Sweetheart that's not the bathroom, that's your wardrobe love." Charles started in confusion at the wardrobe before his face suddenly lit up in excitement. Oh dear lord what was he thinking? "Oh. Hay mum?" Margaret eyed her son cautiously as he started to knock on the inside panels of the wardrobe. She knew that tone in his voice. It was the same tone he used as a child when he was hit by an idea for a game that was sure to lead to trouble. "Yes love?"
"Do you think if I climbed into the wardrobe and shut the door, I'd end up in Narnia? I've always wanted to go." Margaret shut her eyes and counted to five as the lads behind her fell into hysterics. Don't laugh Margaret. Do. Not. Fucking. Laugh. "Hay maybe we could get married in Narnia? Do you think Molly would like that Nan?" Nan looked up from her phone, no doubt videoing the exchange to use for later. It was probably best she wasn't giving a wedding speech.
"I don't think so mate. Our Molls much prefers the sun. Why don't you hop out an' ask her tomorrow then you can both come back and find Narnia together. How does that sound?" Charles paused as if contemplating the idea before nodding and climbing out of the wardrobe. "I think that's probably best Nan." Giggling to herself Margaret let Charles over to the bed as Nan herded the still giggling lads out of Charles's room. Margaret pulled the duvet over Charles as he rolled over with a yawn. She moved into the bathroom and poured a glass of water and placed it on his bedside table, with some Asperin. Something told her he was going to need it. Closing the door behind her she turned to an amused looking Nan. "Ear, you know that coat stand you've got in the hall?" Margaret and the lads eyed Nan curiously. "Yes, what about it?"
"Well I was thinkin it don't half look like that lamp post from the Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe. What do you say we play a little trick on Charlie boy for in the morning?" The lads both high fived as they ran down the stairs to get it. Oh the Boss wouldn't know what hit him.
The next morning Margaret was in the kitchen handing out mugs of tea when Charles came shuffling into the kitchen looking the worst for wear. "Morning," he greeted everyone as he dropped a kiss on Molly's head as she lay slumped in her seat, her head resting on the table in an attempt to stop the room from spinning. As he moved to place a Rosabaya pod into the machine, Nan, Margaret, Belinda and Kinders watched Charles expectantly over their mugs. As he turned Margaret noticed Charles' expression shift to one of uncertainty. "Hay Mum?" hiding her smirk behind her mug Margret tried to school her face into a neutral expression. "Yes love?"
"What is the coat rack from the hall doing in our room? More to the point, why the fuck is there a sign on the wardrobe saying 'this way to Narnia?" There was a hush in the room as the occupants tried hard not to meet each other's eye, none of them wanted to be the first to crack. Suddenly Nan gave a snort and threw her head back in laughter, the rest of the room following suit. Charles stared at everyone in confusion, clearly aware he was missing something. "What the fuck is goin on?" Catching her breath Margaret gave a chuckle as she wiped her eyes. "Ah son what do you remember about last night?" Charles' face became alert as he eyed everyone in the room. With a sigh he sat at the table and wearily ran his hand through his hair.
"What the fuck did I do this time?" his only answer was more laughter.
A/N: So sorry for the delay. Here's an extra long chapter to make up for it. Enjoy